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The award for worst ISP goes to... it starts with Talk and ends with Talk

Microsoft and Facebook's transatlantic cable completed

Cloud washes Dell off perch atop storage market

Cisco puts UCS director on death row, to be replaced by cloudy 'Intersight'

Red Hat pledges patent protection for 99 per cent of FOSS-ware

Ah, good ol' Windows update cycles... Wait, before anything else, check your hardware

Behold iOS 11, an entirely new computer platform from Apple

More are paying to stream music, but YouTube still holds the value gap

Don’t fear the software shopkeeper: T&Cs banning bad reviews aren’t legal in America

Want to get around app whitelists by pretending to be Microsoft? Of course you can...

Aw, not you too, Verizon: US telco joins list of leaky AWS S3 buckets

NBD: Adobe just dumped its PRIVATE PGP key on the internet

HMRC scoops up Microsoft veep for CIO role

So you're already in the cloud but need to come back down to Earth

A big ask for any nerd, but going outside (your usual data sets) can be good for you

So much data, so little time: How to not flip your wig processing it

Facebook U-turn: React, other libraries freed from unloved patent license

Java SE 9 and Java EE 8 arrive, 364 days later than first planned

Puppet plays puppet master, gobbles up automation firm Distelli

GitLab freezes GraphQL project amid looming Facebook patent fears

For Facebook, ignorance is the business model: Social net is shocked – SHOCKED – that people behave badly

UK.gov lays down rules for cross-Whitehall data slurps

Microsoft reveals details of flagship London store within spitting distance from Apple's

How Apple is taming the ad biz. Just don't expect Google or Zuck to follow

Super Cali goes ballistic, Gatorade app is bogus: Even the sound of it is something quite atrocious

If you need to replace anything other than your iPhone 8's battery or display, good luck

Crap cracked fat-attack Pact app chaps slapped in pact backtrack infract

Attention adults working in the real world: Do not upgrade to iOS 11 if you use Outlook, Exchange

Geek's Guide

NASA, wait, wait lemme put my drink down... NASA, you need to be searching for vanadium

Ducks ding dongs in face of stiff competition

Boffins discover tightest black hole binary system – and it's supermassive

NASA Earthonauts emerge from eight-month isolation in simulated Mars visit

Silicon brains ready to plug into London

Has science gone too far, part 97: Boffins craft code to find protesters on social networks, rate them on their violence

Chatbots: A load of hype or fancy lifehack for the lazy IT person?

Baidu-backed fund has a BEEELLION quid for 100 self-driving projects

Verity Stob

Kebab and pizza shop owner jailed for hiding £179k from the taxman

You forgot that you hired me and now you're saying it's MY fault?

Quebec takes mature approach to 'grilled cheese' ban

Programming in the Middle Ages: Docker makes a lovely pair of trousers

Software

Patents, image via Shutterstock

Red Hat pledges patent protection for 99 per cent of FOSS-ware

Red Hat says it has amassed over 2,000 patents and won't enforce them if the technologies they describe are used in properly-licensed open-source software.

Simon Sharwood, 22 Sep 2017

Smashed computer

Ah, good ol' Windows update cycles... Wait, before anything else, check your hardware

SponsoredWindows 10 means a major shift in how IT operations should perceive and manage Windows and their hardware estate. The most significant is the move away from Big Bang version launches in favour of a subscription model with much more frequent updates.

David Gordon, 21 Sep 2017

Behold iOS 11, an entirely new computer platform from Apple

ReviewIt's a massive and ambitious upgrade for iPads, but older hardware can't cut it

More are paying to stream music, but YouTube still holds the value gap

Demand's there; compensating artists is another issue

Google Cloud's API knows the sort of thing you like to look at

And now has creepy 'entity' sentiment analysis too

Chap tames Slack by piping it into Emacs

And then filtering out all the stuff he doesn't need to read

macOS High Sierra more like 'Cry Sierra' for Mac-wielding beta testers

Early issues arise with new version of OS X 10.13

Black screen of death after Win10 update? Microsoft blames HP

OEM factory images create 'incorrect registry keys'

Microsoft Office 365 Exchange issues for users across Europe

UpdatedExpect problems and delays

Linux 4.14 'getting very core new functionality' says Linus Torvalds

Memory management wonks, this release is for you. And also you Hyper-V admins

Google to kill Chrome autoplay madness

Sorta, kinda, well not really

HP users moaning over 10-minute login lag during 'Win 10 update'

Like watching a black screen dry (literally)

Python explosion blamed on pandas

Data science fad just won't die

Unloved Microsoft Edge is much improved – but will anyone use it?

We saw what you did there, Windows 10 web browser bods

Windows 10 Creators Update will add app-level privacy controls

Enterprises can lock down Telemetry a little more

Get out your specs: Java EE's headed to the Eclipse Foundation

Yes, we meant specifications... and think up a name, would you?

Slack re-invents the extranet and shared Notes databases with cross-company teams

Everything hip is new again

Cows walk on green field in front of silos

Government lab that gives a crap pushes open source

Boffins reveal code for turning cow pies into cash

Nerd in shower photo via Shutterstock

Linus Torvalds' lifestyle tips for hackers: Be like me, work in a bathrobe, no showers before noon

Also be curious and constructive by working on Linux instead of breaking it

F1 2017 game

Microsoft fixing Windows 10 'stuttering' bugs in Creators Update

Insider build aims to address glitch spotted by gamers

Opinion

News

BlackBerry admits: We could do better at patching

Still the most secure Android? It won't get last year's update

Everyone loves programming in Python! You disagree? But it's the fastest growing, says Stack Overflow

It's a grower not a, er, yeah...

F-35 firmware patches to be rolled out 'like iPhone updates'

'I see you're trying to land. Please reboot the flight control system to continue'

Atlassian releases 'Stride', because HipChat isn't hip enough to whack Slack

New collaboration tool is 'recommended upgrade' to HipChat, beats it on price

You are the one per cent if you read Firefox's privacy spiels

So Mozilla's going to give them their very own Tab, perhaps ahead of opt-out slurping

Google puts the last coat of polish on Chrome 61

WebUSB, WebShare, JavaScript Modules and more due any day now

Must go faster, must go faster! Oracle lobs Java EE into GitHub, vows rapid Java SE releases

Plenty of life left in this dinosaur

What's your flava? Ooo, tell me what's your flava... of Ubuntu

The options when 17.10 drops

WhatsApp irons a shirt, dons a suit, prepares business services

Slackers beware, Facebook-owned messaging platform thinks it can charge for chat

Facebook promised to open up its log storage system

LogDevice: how to make sense of 10 hyperscale data centres

Linus Torvalds passed a kidney stone and then squeezed out Linux 4.13

SMB 1.0 also deemed better out than in, as TLS makes it into the kernel

HPE wraps up $8.8bn Micro Focus software dump spin-off

Newly minted software giant formally begins operations

Microsoft's Terry Myerson, speaking at Build 2015

Microsoft sets the date for Fall Creators Update

After Lenovo leaks the details

OpenStack

OpenStack Pike release bites hard on microservices and scale

Project tries to move on to lifecycle management rather than initial setup

Privacy-focused search engine DeepSearch slinks out of hiding

New web crawler from TSignal doesn't care who you are

Google ARCore

Google ARCore brings augmented reality to relatively small audience

At least it doesn't require a bleeding-edge PC and costly goggles

Microsoft's fix for web graphics going AWOL? Disable your antivirus

Or stop using Internet Explorer 11, of course

Sunset

MongoDB quits Solaris, wants to work on an OS people actually use

Says users are migrating away, criticizes Oracle's roadmap and ends builds and support, effective ASAP

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