Personal Tech News and Views for the World • The Register

Microsoft sparks up Ignite with fresh Azure, Office 365 features

You'll never guess what NetApp's new E-Series flash box ca... Yes. It's faster and stores more

IETF doc seeks reliable vSwitch benchmark

What's in this Monday morning storage BLT? A 12TB WD HDD, wars of words – and more

After Microsoft calls out HP Inc over stalled Windows 10 logins, HP bounces back with a fix

Hortonworks aims to entice enterprise with simple data management service

Red Hat pledges patent protection for 99 per cent of FOSS-ware

Ah, good ol' Windows update cycles... Wait, before anything else, check your hardware

Brit broke anti-terror law by refusing to cough up passwords to cops

CBS's Showtime caught mining crypto-coins in viewers' web browsers

Sensitive client emails, usernames, passwords exposed in Deloitte hack

Insteon and Wink home hubs appear to have a problem with encryption

HMRC scoops up Microsoft veep for CIO role

So you're already in the cloud but need to come back down to Earth

A big ask for any nerd, but going outside (your usual data sets) can be good for you

So much data, so little time: How to not flip your wig processing it

Facebook U-turn: React, other libraries freed from unloved patent license

Java SE 9 and Java EE 8 arrive, 364 days later than first planned

Puppet plays puppet master, gobbles up automation firm Distelli

GitLab freezes GraphQL project amid looming Facebook patent fears

More than half of small firms plan on using Privacy Shield – survey

London Mayor backs talks with Uber after head honcho's apology

SAP gobbles customer identity management startup Gigya for $350m

Compsci grads get the fattest pay cheques six months after uni – report

Fresh chips from Intel (yay?) at 14nm (awww)

iPhone 8: Apple has CPU cycles to burn

Want to keep in contact with friends and family without having to sell your personal data?

Super Cali goes ballistic, Gatorade app is bogus: Even the sound of it is something quite atrocious

Geek's Guide

Hotter than the Sun: JET – Earth’s biggest fusion reactor, in Culham

Don't panic, but.. ALIEN galaxies are slamming Earth with ultra-high-energy cosmic rays

Hurricane Maria leaves Arecibo radio telescope damaged and dark

Sputnik-1 replica used to test the real thing goes under the hammer

Microsoft: We've made a coding language for a quantum computer that may or may not exist

Sigfox doesn't do IP and is therefore secure, says UK IoT network operator

AI in Medicine? It's back to the future, Dr Watson

Wanna get started with practical AI? Check out this chap's Rubik's Cube solving neural-net code

Verity Stob

Limp Weiner to get 21 months in the hole

Kebab and pizza shop owner jailed for hiding £179k from the taxman

You forgot that you hired me and now you're saying it's MY fault?

Quebec takes mature approach to 'grilled cheese' ban

Personal Tech

Intel 8th Gen Core chips

Fresh chips from Intel (yay?) at 14nm (awww)

Intel has unveiled a new line of Coffee Lake 8th gen Core processors, this time aiming for the gaming and creative crowds.

Shaun Nichols, 25 Sep 2017

iPhone 8: Apple has CPU cycles to burn

While the iPhone 8 retains the same unremarkable design for the fourth year running, the internals are a different story. Thanks to extraordinary improvements in semiconductor design, it has been able to shrink the capacity and size of its battery pack, while opening up a significant performance lead over Qualcomm and Samsung.

Andrew Orlowski, 25 Sep 2017

Want to keep in contact with friends and family without having to sell your personal data?

ReviewThen Loop – or, at least, a future version of it – may be for you

Super Cali goes ballistic, Gatorade app is bogus: Even the sound of it is something quite atrocious

And who's going to stand up for the Arnold Palmer?

If you need to replace anything other than your iPhone 8's battery or display, good luck

And things are looking even worse for the X

Crap cracked fat-attack Pact app chaps slapped in pact backtrack infract

US watchdog raps breach-of-contract brats for retracted transacts

Attention adults working in the real world: Do not upgrade to iOS 11 if you use Outlook, Exchange

Kiss your Microsoft email goodbye, for now, if you update

Android slingers tout mobes with customized baked-in big-biz configs

Chocolate Factory pushing enterprises' corporate settings right out of the box

Falling apart at the seamless: Inside Apple's LTE Watch fiasco

AnalysisKludge takes shine off ever-improving Watch

Register Lectures tackle war and power... in the digital world at least

LecturesMists? Mellowness? Not at these talks...

GNOME Foundation backs 'freedom-oriented' smartphone

Librem 5 will run only open-source code, PureOS and feature radio kill switch

Bill Gates says he'd do CTRL-ALT-DEL with one key if given the chance to go back through time

Gives two-fingered salute to IBM designers for forcing us to use three-fingered salute

Mobe reception grief turns LTE Apple Watch 3 into – er, a dull watch

Plus: You can't switch off Wi-Fi and Bluetooth on iOS 11

Amazon wants to be king of the nerd goggles

Glasshole Bezos sees no shame

Itching to stuff iOS 11 on your iPhone? You may want to hold off for a bit

Apps are gonna break. Plus of course, Apple always screws up the first iteration

Sprint, T-Mobile US reignite mega-merger talks (again)

You want more competition, America? Here's another all-powerful telco monolith

Samsung's Galaxy Note 8 is hot, but not much more than the S8+

First fondleIt's stylish, but the stylus doesn't add a lot

HP Inc's EliteOne all-in-one PC

What do you call an all-in-one PC that isn't? 'Upgradeable', says HP

Screens-on-a-stalk and replaceable HDD and RAM may not a revolution make

Jabra evolve 80 noise canceling headphones

Noise-canceling headphones with a DO NOT DISTURB light can't silence your critics

Ears-on testJabra's Evolve 80 will hush your office, but the red warning ring is mere bling

Car on Monopoly board. PHOTO BY Kamira, editorial use ONLY VIA SHUTTERSTOCK

Google sued by Gab over Play Store booting

'Free speech' Twitter alternative alleges antitrust foul

Opinion

News

Essential's Rubin coy on mysterious Plan to Take Over the Universe

One home at a time

Why the Apple Watch with LTE means a very Apple-y sort of freedom

Caveat emptor: It's not what you think

'All-screen display'? But surely every display is all-screen... or is a screen not a display?

Something for the Weekend, Sir?Sounds like a good idea but looks can be deceptive

Facebook posts put Pharma Bro Martin Shkreli in prison as a danger to society

Nope, not over the securities fraud, or the drug price hike

Apple's 'shoddy' Beats headphones get slammed in lawsuit

Claims of sweat resistance and durability are lies, litigious customers contend

Sacre bleu! Apple's high price, marginal gain iPhone strategy leaves it stuck in the mud

CommentSamsung has little to fear

Samsung mobile launches bug bounty program

Crack a Galaxy or bash Bixby and score US$20K to $200K

Apple: Our stores are your 'town square' and a $1,000 iPhone is your 'future'

Steve Jobs Theater fittingly opens with cult-like showcasing of overpriced gear

Mobile industry begrudgingly accepts impacts of Apple, Google et al

Mobile World CongressBut holds out hope that self-driving cars, smart homes and VR can change that

Five ways Apple can fix the iPhone, but won't

We've got a little listicle... of missing, must-have features

Massive iPhone X leak trashes Apple's 10th anniversary circus

Any point turning up? Not now

The new, new Psion is getting near production. Here's what it looks like

World ExclusiveClamshell QWERTY has a few unique tricks

WiFi outage

RIP wireless laptop docks as Intel bins WiGig parts

Chipzilla thinks fast short-range wireless is good for VR, where desks are always tidy

London Tube tracking trial may make commuting less miserable

Fascinating detail on how people move around the system

我的天啊! China gives Weibo users a week to use their real names

Nothing at all wrong with this

Stuff the movement of celestial spheres, let's sit down and watch Bonnie Tyler on TV

Something for the Weekend, Sir?If someone filmed it, it must be real

A stack of Oreo cookies

Google rushes to curb Oreo's massive appetite for your 4G mobile data

Android 8.0 bug runs internet traffic over LTE rather than Wi-Fi

Huawei P8

We don't need another hero: Huawei overtakes Apple – even without a big-hitter

All we want is life beyond the iPhoneDome…

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