The Week in Summary

Facebook F8 2018

Facebook's democracy salvage effort tilts scale in Mississippi primary

In its effort to prevent election meddling, Facebook has ended up meddling in an election.
Thomas Claburn, 25 May 2018
corpse
1

IBM's Watson Health wing left looking poorly after 'massive' layoffs

IBM has laid off approximately 50 and 70 per cent of staff this week in its Watson Health division, according to inside sources.
Iain Thomson, 25 May 2018

Epyc fail? We can defeat AMD's virtual machine encryption, say boffins

German researchers reckon they have devised a method to thwart the security mechanisms AMD's Epyc server chips use to automatically encrypt virtual machines in memory.
Shaun Nichols, 25 May 2018
3

Remember that $5,000 you spent on Tesla's Autopilot and then sued when it didn't deliver? We have good news...

Tesla has reached a court settlement over its alleged "essentially unusable and demonstrably dangerous" Autopilot system.
Kieren McCarthy, 25 May 2018
ship
8

International Maritime Organisation turns salty gaze on regulating robotic shipping

The International Maritime Organisation has woken up to the notion of robot boats – and is now pondering whether to regulate them.
Gareth Corfield, 25 May 2018
panic
12

GDPRmageddon: They think it's all over! Protip, it has only just begun

The big day has finally arrived, Europe's General Data Protection Regulation is now in force – but as the calendar flicked over last night, those breathing a sigh of relief will be sorely disappointed.
Rebecca Hill, 25 May 2018
NASA tech inspects MOMA
2

Toaster oven-sized boffin box bound for Mars to search for life

A team from NASA's Goddard Space Flight Center gathered last week to bid farewell to a mass spectrometer as it began its journey to the red planet via an assembly plant in Italy.
Richard Speed, 25 May 2018
Garmin Vivoactive3
15

The great wearables myth busted: Apps never, ever mattered

Analysis Whoever predicted that fitness bling-flingers would struggle to survive should take note of the latest numbers on the wearable market from Canalys.
Andrew Orlowski, 25 May 2018
Called a bum bag in uk though it is worn over genitals, not bum, and fanny pack in the US. Waist purse
1

Unclip your pager and bag from your belt: We need to make room for a battery-powered 1TB HD

VR folk who feel they haven't got enough gear strapped to their bodies will be please to know Seagate has developed a strap-on portable drive and battery combo for HTC's Vive Focus virtual reality headset.
Chris Mellor, 25 May 2018
Max Schrems
69

Max Schrems is back: Facebook, Google hit with GDPR complaint

Max Schrems, the thorn in Facebook’s side, has returned to launch the first challenges under the EU’s new data protection laws.
Rebecca Hill, 25 May 2018
Autophage Engine
22

You've heard that pop will eat itself. Boffins have unveiled a rocket that does the same

Scottish boffins, along with colleagues in Ukraine, have developed a "self-eating" rocket engine that could affordably fling a cubesat into orbit.
Richard Speed, 25 May 2018
The Essential Phone
10

Android daddy Andy Rubin's Essential axes handset, is 'actively shopping itself' – report

Andy Rubin's quixotic smartphone startup, Essential Products, has cancelled a handset and is looking for buyers, according to a Bloomberg report – just a month after opening its doors in the UK.
Andrew Orlowski, 25 May 2018
Repairman in orange overalls threateningly wields tape measure
84

BOFH: Their bright orange plumage warns other species, 'Back off! I'm dangerous!'

Episode 9 I'm already in a bit of a foul mood when the Boss calls me into his office for "a quick word". The office Health and Safety enthusiast is there too so I know the meeting will be neither quick nor a single word.
Simon Travaglia, 25 May 2018
Police search
26

MPs slam UK.gov's 'unacceptable' hoarding of custody images

The UK government's approach to deleting custody images of innocent people – in that it only scraps them on request – is unacceptable and possibly illegal, MPs have said.
Rebecca Hill, 25 May 2018
Man looks into his cellphone/mobile - which looks back at him
56

Is your smart device a bit thick? It's about to get a lot worse

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Hooded eyes are following my keystrokes. Hidden ears are analysing every shuffle.
Alistair Dabbs, 25 May 2018
36

UK Home Office's £885m crim records digi effort: A 'masterclass in incompetence'

The UK government's digitization of its Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) – a system for checking criminal records – is "a masterclass in incompetence," according to a damning report by the government's spending watchdog.
Kat Hall, 25 May 2018
163

US websites block netizens in Europe: Why are they ghosting EU? It's not you, it's GDPR

Folks trying to read the NY Daily News, say, or the Chicago Tribune – the third-biggest US daily newspaper – online from a location within the EU have been blocked from visiting the websites due to new data protection laws.
Rebecca Hill, 25 May 2018
Trying to catch money in a net
33

Can't pay Information Commissioner's fine? No problem! Just liquidate your firm

The UK's data protection watchdog has recovered only about half the value of fines doled out to dodgy data controllers, and those handed to spam marketing firms are the most likely to remain unpaid.
Rebecca Hill, 25 May 2018
Square contactless Reader
7

It's hip to be Square: Twitter founder Jack Dorsey's other firm targets White Van Man

Profile Ever wandered into a bank on weekday morning and marvelled at length of the queue? In a supposedly cashless era, it's the sight of a nation of shopkeepers depositing its cash.
Andrew Orlowski, 25 May 2018
Bank vault
55

Police block roads to stop tech support chap 'robbing a bank'

On-Call Welcome again to On-Call, The Register's Friday reader-contributed tales of tech support jobs gone wrong.
Simon Sharwood, 25 May 2018
Lady  standing on a hand with a megaphone shouting into mans ear
29

Welcome to your sci-fi dystopia: Sonic firewalls to crumble inaudible ad-tracking phone cookies

Boffins in Austria have developed a defense against acoustic cookies, a form of ad tracking by which smartphones can send and receive data using sounds people can't hear.
Thomas Claburn, 25 May 2018
Shutterstock brick wall by StockStudio

Cisco admins: Hold that IOS XR update while you get new firmware

Eight Cisco NCS 6000 line cards need firmware upgrades, after Switchzilla learned they could be bricked by an IOS XR upgrade.
ORDNANCE SURVEY MAP STACK WITH COMPASS AND PENCILS
12

Tufts boffins track device location without GPS or towers

Tufts University boffins believe the combination of 5G and the Internet of Things will make it impossible for networks to track the expected tens of billions of connected devices.
Hammer, spanner and screw
8

Electron patches patch after security researcher bypassed said patch

In an update last week, the developers of Electron – the toolkit used to craft widely used apps from Skype and Slack to Atom – shipped a patch to their January patch, and now, an infosec researcher has explained why.
16

Zimmerman and friends: 'Are you listening? PGP is not broken'

ProtonMail has weighed into 2018's worst branded-bug PR disaster, EFAIL with a simple statement: “PGP is not broken”.
NBN Co fixed wireless antenna
12

Waiting for 100 Mbps NBN on wireless? Errr, umm, sorry about that

Households hoping to one day access 100 Mbps fixed wireless services on the National Broadband Network got a hard let-down last night, when CEO Bill Morrow said the rollout would not proceed.
Uber self-driving car on a transport truck
97

Uber robo-ride's deadly crash: Self-driving car had emergency braking switched off by design

One of Uber’s self-driving cars killed a pedestrian crossing the road at night because its emergency braking systems were turned off, according to an investigation by the US government's National Transport Safety Board.
Katyanna Quach, 24 May 2018
red iphone
21

Samsung loses (again) to Apple in patent battle (again). This time to the tune of a mere $539m

A US court has yet again ruled that Samsung copied Apple's smartphone design patents, and this time the Korean electronics giant is on the hook for $539m.
Shaun Nichols, 24 May 2018
Elon Musk
117

As Tesla hits speed bump after speed bump, Elon Musk loses his mind in anti-media rant

Elon Musk is having a bad week.
Kieren McCarthy, 24 May 2018
Comet 67P/Churyumov-Gerasimenko
5

Comet 67P's cute rubber duck shape perfect for causing eruptions

Scientists have found that the jets of ice and dust wafting from comet 67P are down to the way sunlight beams hits its unique rubber ducky shaped surface.
Katyanna Quach, 24 May 2018
File photo of Police in Seattle, Washington
50

Trio indicted after police SWAT prank call leads to cops killing bloke

Three men were this week indicted for their alleged roles in a fatal police "swatting" of a home in Kansas, USA.
Shaun Nichols, 24 May 2018
Facebook issue ad
21

New Facebook political ad rules: Now you must prove your ID before undermining democracy

Facebook has rolled out its promised disclosure regime for political and issue advertising, heralding a new age of transparency and civic responsibility. Or so Facebook folks suggest.
Thomas Claburn, 24 May 2018
FBI
9

FBI agents take aim at VPNFilter botnet, point finger at Russia, yell 'national security threat'

The FBI says it is taking steps to stop the spread of the VPNFilter malware and botnet, warning that it's a national security issue.
Shaun Nichols, 24 May 2018
Person hides face in shocked anticipation of something horrible. Photo via shutterstock
181

You know that silly fear about Alexa recording everything and leaking it online? It just happened

Updated It's time to break out your "Alexa, I Told You So" banners – because a Portland, Oregon, couple received a phone call from one of the husband's employees earlier this month, telling them she had just received a recording of them talking privately in their home.
Kieren McCarthy, 24 May 2018
staff in business suits thrash each other with ring binders
148

Ongoing game of Galileo chicken goes up a notch as the UK talks refunds

The Galileo "Yo Momma"-style war of words got angrier today with the UK threatening to recover its investment in the EU's space satellite project if the nation is booted out post-Brexit.
Richard Speed, 24 May 2018
12

Brit doctors surgery fined £35k over medical data fumble

Bayswater Medical Centre (BMC) in London is licking its wounds after taking a not insignificant punch to the wallet for discarding highly sensitive medical information in an empty building for a year and a half.
Paul Kunert, 24 May 2018
41

Mobile app devs have, oh, about 9 hours left to decide whether to stay on Google's ad platform

Android app developers have hours left to decide whether to change their business models or leave Google's ad ecosystem because of its stubborn stance on the EU's new Global Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) regulations, due to come into effect tomorrow.
Andrew Orlowski, 24 May 2018
Drinks party at M3 day one
3

AI and robotics legend Joanna Bryson to kick off MCubed

Events We’re are very excited to announce that Dr Joanna Bryson will be one of our keynote speakers at MCubed.
Team Register, 24 May 2018
Quick fix - worker running while carrying a wrench
38

Microsoft patches problematic OS to deal with SSD woes

A chink of light has appeared in the wall of Windows 10 update woes in the form of a patch that should address the SSD problems plaguing the OS.
Richard Speed, 24 May 2018
Lady  standing on a hand with a megaphone shouting into mans ear
5

UK's spy auditor: What should we ask when reviewing super-slurp warrants?

The body formed to audit Britain's spies has asked non-government bods what its team of judicial commissioners should consider when handing out warrants for bulk data-slurping.
Rebecca Hill, 24 May 2018
5

Dell EMC 'years behind' in everything from flash to cloud, hoots NetApp CEO

NetApp has reported full-year revenues for 2018 of $5.91bn, an increase of 7 per cent over fiscal 2017 and the first annual growth it has seen since 2015.
Chris Mellor, 24 May 2018
Royal Navy frigate HMS Richmond, Type 23. Crown copyright
112

UK's Royal Navy accepts missile-blasting missile as Gulf clouds gather

A Royal Navy frigate is to sail to the Far East while carrying the newly accepted Sea Ceptor anti-missile missile system.
Gareth Corfield, 24 May 2018
man contemplating /meditating in silhouette against sunset
101

Church of England will commune with God for you via Amazon's Echo

Technology worship has ascended to a higher spiritual plane with the Church of England now offering the faithful daily voice-activated prayers from Amazon's smart home kit, Echo.
Kat Hall, 24 May 2018
Roadworks: fibre optic cable being laid
14

TalkTalk plans to sell family B2B jewel to Daisy Group for £175m

Beleaguered telco TalkTalk has swung to a net loss of £79m in preliminary results for fiscal '18 ended 31 March, and is preparing to saw off its B2B division in a planned £175m sale to Daisy Group.
Kat Hall, 24 May 2018
Penguins argue
106

Welcome to Ubuntu 18.04: Make yourself at GNOME. Cup of data-slurping dispute, anyone?

Comment Ubuntu 18.04, launched last month, included a new Welcome application that runs the first time you boot into your new install. The Welcome app does several things, including offering to opt you out of Canonical's new data collection tool.
Parade of dancers in costume at  London's Notting Hill carnival.
43

London's Met Police: We won't use facial recognition at Notting Hill Carnival

London cops will not use controversial and inaccurate facial recognition technology at this year's Notting Hill Carnival – in a departure from the trend over the previous two years.
Rebecca Hill, 24 May 2018
kids drink milkshake
124

Microsoft gives users options for Office data slurpage – Basic or Full

Microsoft is rolling out an update to Office products to introduce Windows 10-style telemetry data slurping. Or rather the software business has made it very clear to users it is doing so and they cannot opt out.
Richard Speed, 24 May 2018
watching_648
14

Oracle nemesis MariaDB tries to lure enterprise folk with TX 3.0

Open-source database biz MariaDB has upped the ante in its war against Oracle, promising enterprise customers better compatibility with – and easier migration from – Big Red.
Rebecca Hill, 24 May 2018
Cloudy server conceptual illustration. Photo by Shutterstock
7

Microsoft and boffins cook up hardware-secured database

At the IEEE Symposium on Security and Privacy in San Francisco, Calif., this week, researchers from Imperial College London and Microsoft presented an experimental database engine called EnclaveDB that aims to keep data and database queries secure even when the host system has been compromised.
Thomas Claburn, 24 May 2018
End of the line (train line). Photo by Shutterstock
10

Doc 'Cluetrain' Searls' privacy engine project is just the ticket for IEEE

David “Doc” Searls, coauthor of 1999's cyber-utopian Cluetrain Manifesto, has persuaded the IEEE to launch one of two new projects seeking to inject a dose of ethics and privacy awareness into the world of technology.
Shutterstock soft serve ice cream

OpenStack had a summit, so everyone's talking about it

Juniper Networks announced a tie-up with Red Hat integrating Red Hats OpenShift Container Platform and OpenStack Platform into Juniper's Contrail Enterprise Multicloud.
cloud
2

Open Source MANO Release FOUR lands

The European Telecommunications Standards Institute (ETSI) has dropped the latest iteration of its open source management and orchestration (OS MANO, or OSM) environment.
Enigma machine Shutterstock
38

US Senator Ron Wyden to Pentagon: Encrypt your websites

As if trying to buy a flying fleet of F-35s wasn't enough, now the Department of Defense is being asked to secure its Websites.
Someone using a copying machine
10

Servers crashed and burned. So, Qualcomm's back to Ctrl-C, Ctrl-V'ing Arm cores into phones

Following its Centriq server processor implosion, Qualcomm has dusted itself off, and today presented to the world another smartphone processor: the Snapdragon 710.
Chris Williams, 24 May 2018
Lab tech with urine sample - Shutterstock
25

Oz sports’ pee-samplers outed buying Cellebrite phone-crack kit

Australia is ramping up its use of phone-cracking technology to crack serious criminals: its peak sports anti-doping body has taken a Cellbrite licence.
38

Hold on. Here's an idea. Let's force AI bots to identify themselves as automatons, says Cali

A law bill that would require AI bots pretending to be humans to identify themselves as such is progressing through California's Congress – but has hit opposition from the Electronic Freedom Foundation.
Kieren McCarthy, 24 May 2018
Someone in an Uber ride
50

Uber jams Arizona robo-car project into reverse gear after deadly smash

Uber has confirmed that it's shutting down its self-driving car operation in Arizona – without waiting for the conclusion of the official investigation into the death of a pedestrian in the US state in March.
Iain Thomson, 24 May 2018
child browsing on tablet outdoors. pHOTO BY SHUTTERSTOCK
39

Kids and the web latest: 'Won't somebody please think of the children!' US Congresscritters plead

US Congress is pondering a bipartisan measure to expand the Children's Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) – the law that, well, protects children's privacy online.
Shaun Nichols, 23 May 2018
3

Lawyer warned FCC of Securus phone-tracking risks 10 months ago

Some ten months before Sen. Ron Wyden would request the FCC examine legal concerns over the service, a US lawyer had alerted the agency to potential problems with the Securus THREADS database.
Shaun Nichols, 23 May 2018
109

EmDrive? More like BS drive: Physics-defying space engine flunks out

The "impossible" EmDrive may be just that, though don't count it out just yet.
Thomas Claburn, 23 May 2018
rao
5

Intel's latest promise: Our first AI ASIC chips will arrive in 2019

AI Dev Con Intel announced a range of machine learning software tools and hinted at new chips on Wednesday, including its first commercial AI ASIC, the NNP-L1000, launching in 2019.
Katyanna Quach, 23 May 2018
Putin
32

Advanced VPNFilter malware menacing routers worldwide

A newly-disclosed malware infection has compromised more than 500,000 home and small office routers and NAS boxes.
Shaun Nichols, 23 May 2018
Donald trump tweeting
102

President Trump broke US Constitution with Twitter bans – judge

Donald Trump has broken the United States Constitution, a New York district court ruled Wednesday, putting the US president in legal hot water.
Kieren McCarthy, 23 May 2018
Image by gyn9037 http://www.shutterstock.com/gallery-691846p1.html
22

Brit Attorney General: Nation state cyber attack is an act of war

Hostile states targeting essential infrastructure and services in Britain should be dealt with in the same way as any other attack against the nation, the UK Attorney General said today.
Kat Hall, 23 May 2018
63

Swiss sausage sizzler 4.0 hits 200 bangers per hour

With a bank holiday looming (in the UK and US at least) thoughts are turning to barbecues and the traditional burning-of-the-meat.
Richard Speed, 23 May 2018
Pure_Storage_//X90
2

Forward-slash flash: OG upstart Pure Storage shows off fresh models

Nine-year-old flash firm Pure Storage flung out a slew of products to ward off legacy and newbie rivals at its Accelerate event in San Francisco, including – as you'd expect – faster, denser and cheaper arrays.
Chris Mellor, 23 May 2018
Cookies
12

Top UK court to rule whether 4.5m Brit iPhone fanbois can sue Google over cookies

A former director of consumer rights group Which is trying to extract “somewhere between £1bn and £3bn” from Google on behalf of 4.38 million Brits over the naughty placement of advertising cookies.
Gareth Corfield, 23 May 2018
25

UK.gov's use of black box algorithms to decide stuff needs watching

Increased use of algorithms in decision-making risks disproportionately affecting certain groups, MPs have said, urging the government to boost transparency and tackle bias - but not forget the value of public data.
Rebecca Hill, 23 May 2018
Vintage Macintosh SE/30
62

Finally: Historic Eudora email code goes open source

The source code to the Eudora email client is being released by the Computer History Museum, after five years of discussion with the IP owner, Qualcomm.
Andrew Orlowski, 23 May 2018
Micron_5200_pro
3

AI servers will need much more memory. And you know who's going to be there? Yep, big daddy Micron

Analysis Micron has started to separate from Intel in NAND production, just days after whipping the veil off its 7.68TB QLC SSD, and CEO Sanjay Mehrotra and pals are keen to chat up analysts about their vision of the coming "New Micron".
Chris Mellor, 23 May 2018
Phiip Hammond, photo via Shutterstock
42

UK chancellor puts finger in air, promises 15 MEELLION full fibre connections by 2025

The UK's chief purse-strings-puller Philip Hammond has pledged 15 million premises will receive full-fibre broadband by 2025, in an apparent bid to boost Britain's fortunes post-Brexit.
Kat Hall, 23 May 2018
michael_jackson_tilt
90

Boffins: Michael Jackson's tilt was a criminally smooth trick

New research from India into Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal tilt has concluded that, yes, it is physically impossible and dancers should really stop trying to recreate it because Achilles tendon and spinal injuries are not fun.
Richard Speed, 23 May 2018
53

'Clive, help us,' say empty-handed ZX Spectrum reboot buyers

Customers of Retro Computers ltd, the ZX Spectrum themed reboot firm, have now set up a website asking Sir Clive Sinclair to intervene in the non-delivery debacle.
Gareth Corfield, 23 May 2018
22

Machine learning for dummies: You needn't go back to uni to use it

Artificial intelligence and its sub-domains look set to be the next major growth area for software developers, programmers, hackers and just about anyone who has anything to do with software.
Andrew Cobley, 23 May 2018
Raised hands vote
14

DXC UK chops more customer-facing service staff

Frankenfirm DXC Technologies is again looking for front-end customer support staff who are willing to leave with a redundancy cheque, according to an internal document.
Paul Kunert, 23 May 2018
htc U12+ PICS
46

HTC U12+: Like a Pixel without the pratfalls, or eye-watering price tag

Hands on It may be news to you that HTC is still with us, but the fact it's here is good news for phone buyers.
Andrew Orlowski, 23 May 2018
Saturn_rings
14

Astroboffins, get in here and explain Saturn's odd-shaped balls

A trio of physicists reckoned they’ve figured out why some of Saturn’s moons are so oddly shaped, with some looking like giant floating ravioli and others imitating stubby baguettes.
Katyanna Quach, 23 May 2018
Zuckerberg photo Facebook
70

Zuckerberg gets a night off: Much-hyped Euro grilling was all smoke, absolutely no heat

Analysis The European stop on Mark Zuckerberg’s Facebook apology tour on Tuesday amounted to little more than a live read-out of Facebook’s well-rehearsed platitudes and tired PR lines.
Rebecca Hill, 23 May 2018
Wray
44

FBI's flawed phone tally blamed on programming error. 7,800 unbreakable mobes? Er, um...

The FBI apparently gilded the lily in its long campaign against consumer cryptography, telling the world it held more locked phones than it did.
42

Big bimmer bummer: Bavaria's BMW buggies battered by bad bugs

A security audit conducted by Tencent's Keen Security Lab on BMW cars has given the luxury automaker a handy crop of bugs to fix – including a backdoor in infotainment units fitted since 2012.
man with finger pressed to lips
51

Google listens to New Zealand just long enough to ignore it

New Zealand courts are asking Google to take down content associated with current criminal proceedings, to the usual and resounding “No” from the Chocolate Factory.
Shutterstock Turtle
4

Grilled over failed DoE project, Turnbull's Transformers turn turtle

Australia's Digital Transformation Agency (DTA) appears unable to explain its involvement in a failed AU$20m Department of Education IT project that was cancelled last week.
3

ACCC grabs pliers, extracts AU$1.5 million from Optus

Already out-of-pocket by way of customer compensation, Optus has been hit with an AU$1.5 million fine from the Federal Court over its National Broadband Network transition processes.
man in suit clutches briefcase full of cash. Photo by Shutterstock
17

HPE: Hell yeah, those job cuts worked out great… for our investors

Hewlett-Packard Enterprise is crediting the success of its Next corporate remake – as in, who should we fire Next – in helping it top expectations in its latest financial quarter.
Shaun Nichols, 23 May 2018
Cat in tupperware image via Shutterstock
3

VM-container chimera Kata Containers emerges from lab

The open source Kata Containers project, an effort to combine the security advantages of virtual machines with the deployment and management advantages of software-based containers, hit its 1.0 milestone on Tuesday.
Thomas Claburn, 23 May 2018
dentist
4

Can you handle the tooth? AI helps dentists design fake gnashers

Artificially intelligent software has found the next industry to potentially, as the kids say, disrupt – dentistry.
Katyanna Quach, 22 May 2018
Facial recognition
18

Folks are shocked – shocked – that CIA-backed Amazon is selling face-recog tech to US snoops, cops

Analysis The American Civil Liberties Union on Tuesday expressed dismay that Amazon Web Services has been urging US government agencies to use its Rekognition API for state-sponsored facial recognition.
Thomas Claburn, 22 May 2018
16

One year late, US senators act on fake net neutrality comments that drowned the FCC

Two US senators say they were among those whose identities were forged to file bogus comments on the FCC's net neutrality process.
Shaun Nichols, 22 May 2018
arms
79

GDPR for everyone, cries Microsoft: We'll extend Europe's privacy rights worldwide

Microsoft has said it will extend new privacy rights that become law in Europe this week to all its users worldwide.
Kieren McCarthy, 22 May 2018
31

ISP TalkTalk's Wi-Fi passwords Walk Walk thanks to Awks Awks router security hole

A years-old vulnerability continues to menace the security of some home Wi-Fi networks in the UK.
Shaun Nichols, 22 May 2018
kennedy
27

Senator Kennedy: Why I cast my Senate-busting vote for net neutrality

The shocking lack of choice and competition in America's ISP market is why Senator John Kennedy crossed the aisle and voted for a repeal of the FCC's efforts to end net neutrality rules last week.
Kieren McCarthy, 22 May 2018
toast
13

Tintri shares reformatted by investors: 85 per cent plunge in mere weeks

Troubled Tintri admitted it may run out of cash within the next six weeks and go broke – and its shareholders are bailing out fast.
Chris Mellor, 22 May 2018
Falcon 9 on the launchpad (pic: NASA/Bill Ingalls)
20

Through many dangers, toils and snares.... SpaceX to send amazing GRACE to spaaaaace

Because ride-sharing is caring, SpaceX will send the next batch of Iridium NEXT satellites into orbit along with a pair of NASA gravity monitoring orbiters, GRACE-FO.
Richard Speed, 22 May 2018
Tesla Model 3
81

Braking news: Tesla preps firmware fling to 'fix' Model 3's inability to stop in time

Tesla is to issue a firmware update before the weekend for its Model 3 to deal with a critical brake weakness that was highlighted by US website Consumer Reports.
Paul Kunert, 22 May 2018
 staffer looks on in horror as update takes effect
168

About to install the Windows 10 April 2018 Update? You might want to wait a little bit longer

Updated The troubled Windows 10 April 2018 update is facing another issue, with some users losing access to their desktop after installing the new code.
Richard Speed, 22 May 2018
Arm's object detector core at work
54

Within Arm's reach: Chip brains that'll make your 'smart' TV a bit smarter

Processor design house Arm has emitted a few more details about the AI brain it's trying to persuade chip makers to pack into their silicon.
Chris Williams, 22 May 2018
This was built as an adjuct to Jodrell Bank
22

It could be you: National Lottery hands £16m to England's Jodrell Bank

Jodrell Bank is to receive £16.1m in UK lottery and government funding for a gallery dedicated to astronomy.
Kat Hall, 22 May 2018
business guy whispers something to his unimpressed colleague
42

UK digital committee fumes: You didn't answer our questions, Facebook. (Psst. EU. Pass 'em on)

The latest missive in an increasingly tense written battle between the British Parliament's digital committee and Facebook has seen MPs accuse the data-slurping giant of dodging questions and skipping the specifics.
Rebecca Hill, 22 May 2018
bouncer
39

Brit water firms, power plants with crap cyber security will pay up to £17m, peers told

Plans to fine Britain's national utilities and infrastructure providers £17m for shoddy cyber security will be at the forefront of industry's mind once everyone "gets over" GDPR, peers heard at a House of Lords committee.
Kat Hall, 22 May 2018
Geeks Guide book on coffee table, photo The_Register
76

Presto chango, crypto buyo: You're travelling like El Reg's gang of nerds

You were with us when we chucked our backpacks in the boot and drove up the M6 to Jodrell Bank in 2013 and five years on, you're still reading our travel series on UK locations that are covered in scientific or engineering glory.
Gavin Clarke, 22 May 2018
91

Hitler 'is dead' declares French prof who gazed at dictator's nashers

A groundbreaking study of toothbrush-tashed Nazi dictator Adolf Hitler's teeth has confirmed that the late, unlamented Fuehrer is still dead – and, more to the point, definitely died in Berlin in April 1945.
Gareth Corfield, 22 May 2018
Finger pushes power button
6

Pure: Let's be direct about attached storage. Hyperconvergence is not for us

Pure Storage posed widened losses of $64.3m in its Q1 ended April 30, up 12.5 per cent from $57.2m at the same time last year, while it saw an upswing in all-flash array sales.
Chris Mellor, 22 May 2018
39

You've got to be kitten: Vet recruiter told to pay £1k after pinching info from ex-employer

A vet recruitment consultant who squirrelled away the personal details of almost 300 people from his former employer was today slapped on the wrists by the UK's information watchdog.
Rebecca Hill, 22 May 2018
terminators_648
34

Military brainboxes ponder 'UK needs you' list of AI boffins

Rise of the Machines The Ministry of Defence wants to compile a list of AI boffins with UK security clearance that can be hired to help build Britain's inevitable robotic military future.
Gareth Corfield, 22 May 2018
Man weighs himself on imperial scale. photo by shutterstock
16

The great Dell EMC storage slimdown: Giant to trim off product bloat

Dell EMC is hitting refresh on its bloated storage portfolio to simplify the number of lines on sale, and one of the early examples, say sources close to the matter, will be the merger of ScaleIO and XtremIO.
Chris Mellor, 22 May 2018
man dabs in front of DAB radio
202

The future of radio may well be digital, but it won't survive on DAB

Radio in the UK passed a significant milestone on 17 May. For the first time, more than half of Brits now access radio digitally.
Nigel Whitfield, 22 May 2018
sledgehammer reduces cement block to powder
2

Primary Data says stop, Hammerspace, Innodisk cooks some SSDs, and Fujitsu goes blockchain

As ever, it has been a heavy storage week. Here's our curated collection of goodies, goings-on and glitches.
Chris Mellor, 22 May 2018
Cash register, photo via Shutterstock

OVH prepares not-discounts to not-match AWS, Azure, et al

OVH’s wave of global expansion is nearly done and the company will soon follow other public cloud operators’ leads by cost-cutting for customers.
Simon Sharwood, 22 May 2018
Facebook Hello
191

'Facebook takes data from my phone – but I don't have an account!'

Anyone who uses the Facebook phone app knows what a toll it can take both on your mobile data and free time to be plugged into the social network through your device.
Shaun Nichols, 22 May 2018
Typhoon Soudelor photographed from the International Space Station
77

Astronaut took camera on spacewalk, but forgot SD memory card

An International Space Station astronaut took a GoPro camera for a space walk last week, but forgot to bring any memory.
Simon Sharwood, 22 May 2018
Battleship by Darwin Brandis from Shutterstock
25

Router admin? Bored? Let's play Battleships using BGP!

Playing Battleships over the Border Gateway Protocol probably wasn't a scenario considered by the standard's authors, but UK blogger Ben "Jojo" Cox has explained how to do it.
Camouflage WiFi logo
21

EU considers baking new norms of cyber-war into security policies

The European Parliament has been asked to adopt a new set of “norms” about online conflict.
Simon Sharwood, 22 May 2018
DDOS
16

Summoners of web tsunamis have moved to layer 7, says Cloudflare

Attackers have noticed that the world is getting better at fending off massive distributed denial-of-service attacks, and are trying to overwhelm application processes instead.
OpenStack
2

OpenStack makes Zuul continuous delivery tool its second indie project

The OpenStack Foundation has launched its Zuul continuous delivery and integration tool as a discrete project.
Simon Sharwood, 22 May 2018
trolley_shopping_648
5

Adobe acquires Magento to go B2B2C and beyond

Adobe has announced it will acquire Magento Commerce, and fold the gobbled business's platform into its Experience Cloud.
Simon Sharwood, 22 May 2018
Facebook-style hands shake
1

Qualcomm readies 60GHz goodies for Facebook's Terragraph

Qualcomm has backed Facebook's plan to take over the mobile network with its Terragraph project: the chip-designer has revealed it's prepping silicon for backhaul systems using today's 802.11ad and 11.ay in the future.
Dunce
4

Victoria's educational apps-for-students let creeps contact kids

Updated Google and the Victorian Department of Education have set parents, students, teachers, and the Office of the Australian Information Commissioner a poser: at what point does a feature become a vulnerability? Or just too creepy to put in front of kids?
30

Undocumented alien caught stealing orbits in our Solar System

Scientists have discovered the first “interstellar immigrant” living among our Solar System's matter.
Katyanna Quach, 22 May 2018
iPhone 6S battery
24

Good news: It's still legal for Apple to keep its MacBook, iPhone batteries from melting

Apple has had a lawsuit, filed by notorious patent holder Uniloc over safety electronics in notebook and phone batteries, thrown out.
Shaun Nichols, 21 May 2018
Smartphone showing Chinese flag
7

Apple tells app makers to strip VoIP toolkit from iOS software in China

Developers of iOS apps distributed in China have started to receive notifications from Apple that they are required to remove CallKit, a software UI framework for integrating VoIP calling services, from their apps.
Thomas Claburn, 21 May 2018
hurricane_patricia
30

Boffins detect antimatter thundering down from Hurricane Patricia

A team of scientists today reported observing beams of antimatter firing from a ferocious hurricane on Earth for the first time.
Katyanna Quach, 21 May 2018
Couple of slow-coach snails
205

IPv6 growth is slowing and no one knows why. Let's see if El Reg can address what's going on

Analysis Stop us if you've heard this one before: the rollout of IPv6 is going slower than expected.
Kieren McCarthy, 21 May 2018
A blowtorch burning a computer board
90

Microsoft, Google: We've found a fourth data-leaking Meltdown-Spectre CPU hole

A fourth variant of the data-leaking Meltdown-Spectre security flaws in modern processors has been found by Microsoft and Google researchers.
Chris Williams, 21 May 2018
Big bill
18

Fella gets 2.5 years in the clink for coughing up cell numbers in $50m junk text message scam

A bloke armed with a fistful of cellphone numbers has been sent down for 30 months for his role in a scam that fleeced folks out of $50m in bogus monthly charges.
Shaun Nichols, 21 May 2018
Woman singing her heart out
6

NAND I... will always love you, says Micron as it emits 7.68TB QLC SSD

Micron has whipped out the 64-layer 5210 ION SSD – apparently the industry's first QLC NAND flash drive – opening a new front in the SSD-HDD marketing war.
Chris Mellor, 21 May 2018
Photo by Kaspars Grinvalds / Shutterstock
25

Tesla inches toward GPL compliance in low gear: Source code forcibly ejected into public

Following five years of hectoring, Tesla has released a portion of the open-source code it's obligated to provide under the terms of the GNU General Public License (GPL).
Thomas Claburn, 21 May 2018
40

On 20th anniversary of Microsoft antitrust, US Treasury Sec calls for Google monopoly probe

US Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin has added his voice to a growing number of government officials calling for large tech companies to be investigated for potential antitrust violations.
Kieren McCarthy, 21 May 2018
vulnerability
3

Penetration tester pokes six holes in Dell EMC's RecoverPoint products

Infosec outfit Foregenix has uncovered six vulnerabilities in Dell EMC's data protection platform RecoverPoint, three of which have been fixed.
Chris Mellor, 21 May 2018
22

Brit reseller Aria PC mounts appeal against £750k taxman VAT fiddle ruling

Computer parts reseller Aria Technology, which trades as Aria PC, is appealing against a ruling that it defrauded the UK taxman out of £750,000 of VAT.
Gareth Corfield, 21 May 2018
Illustration of someone's privacy being invaded
34

High-end router flinger DrayTek admits to zero day in bunch of Vigor kit

Taiwanese network kit maker DrayTek has 'fessed up to a vulnerability in a large number of its routers which could allow miscreants to hijack internet traffic or steal personal data.
Kat Hall, 21 May 2018
Theresa May glass of water photo via Shutterstock
43

Slurp up patient data for algos that will detect cancer early, says UK PM

The UK prime minister has been wooed by the promises made by proponents of artificial intelligence, today pledging more use of algorithms and data-crunching in the health service.
Rebecca Hill, 21 May 2018
Dan Dare
65

RAF Air Command to take on UK military space ops

The Royal Air Force (RAF) is to take on command and control of UK military space operations, including a possible UK-based alternative to the EU's Galileo satellite constellation.
Richard Speed, 21 May 2018
Graduation ceremony with class clown
17

Greenwich uni fined £120k: Hole in computing school site leaked 20k people's data

The UK's Information Commissioner has slapped a £120,000 fine on the University of Greenwich after a security cockup by its computing and maths school compromised the data of almost 20,000 individuals.
Kat Hall, 21 May 2018
2

Reduxio gets head transplant as co-founder and other execs hit highway

The board at storage startup Reduxio has hired a shiny new CEO amid a wave of senior exec changes, sources have told El Reg.
Chris Mellor, 21 May 2018
Cygnus CRS-9 (pic: NASA/Aubrey Gemignani)
19

Orbital ATK launches another Cygnus without anything blowing up

Orbital ATK's Cygnus freighter launched from Wallops Island, Virginia, this morning carrying supplies, spares and science to the International Space Station.
Richard Speed, 21 May 2018
Street musician busks for coins. Photo by Shutterstock
52

You know me, I don't know you: Hospital reportedly raps staff for peeking at Ed Sheeran data

Two UK hospital workers have reportedly been disciplined for accessing Ed Sheeran's personal details after he was admitted following a bicycle accident.
Rebecca Hill, 21 May 2018
33

Xiaomi the way: Hyped Chinese giant begins its battle for Britain

Analysis Xiaomi's entry into Europe is as feared as it is anticipated. With its vow to keep profit margins on hardware below 5 per cent and make the rest up on services, er, somehow, the Chinese firm threatens a consumer electronics price war that goes way beyond phones. But it might be harder than pundits think.
Andrew Orlowski, 21 May 2018
verity stob portrait
34

The harbingers of Doomwatch: Quist is quite the quasi-Quatermass

Stob "Plastic-eating bugs [...] could help solve the global plastic pollution crisis," was the Guardian's rather chirpy take on this story, triggering the recollection of a childhood nightmare. I inhaled my mouthful of coffee. The office youngsters couldn't understand my panic. "It's the Doomwatch scenario!", I coughed. "The skies will soon be falling!"
Verity Stob, 21 May 2018
Altair 8800 -
26

Now that's old-school cool: Microsoft techies slap Azure Sphere IoT chip in an Altair 8800

Hidden away among the interminably long keynote speeches at Microsoft's recent Build event was a project to delight the retro enthusiast.
Richard Speed, 21 May 2018
Cortana
30

Your parents love you, Cortana. That's why we bought you an upgrade

Microsoft's decided its Cortana speech assistant needs a bit of buffing to survive in a world where Google AI can book restaurants and a parrot can turn the lights off with Alexa*, so the company has acquired a conversational-AI startup called Semantic Machines.
Typing error
128

Sysadmin hailed as hero for deleting data from the wrong disk drive

Who, me? If the thought of another week at work has you down, worry not: The Register has another instalment of “Who, me?” for you to read, so you can enjoy another tale of errors made by someone other than yourself!
Simon Sharwood, 21 May 2018
No swearing WTF?
98

10 social networks ignored UK government consultations

Just four of 14 social networks asked to consult with the UK government on regulation of social media attended the talks, so ministers have revealed plans to require rapid removal of abusive and objectionable material and substantial fines for not doing so.
Simon Sharwood, 21 May 2018
steampunk-looking robot smokes pipe. pic shutterstock
78

Das blinkenlights are back thanks to RPi revival of the PDP-11

Always wanted a PDP-11, but don't have space for the iron? Good news: an obsolete computer enthusiast s offering beta tests of a kit designed to recreate the famous Digital Equipment Corporation box on a Raspberry Pi.
Test image from  image from one of the four cameras aboard the Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite
30

NASA’s new exoplanet-spotter survives sling past the Moon

NASA’s exoplanet-spotting Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite (TESS) has successfully manoeuvred around Earth’s moon.
Simon Sharwood, 21 May 2018
Australia with ethernet cable
13

Telstra's mobile networks go TOESUP* in national outage

Updated Telstra's mobile network experienced a nationwide outage on Monday morning, May 21st, 2018.
LG logo on box
22

LG chairman Koo Bon-moo dies, aged 73

LG chairman Koo Bon-moo has died, aged 73.
Simon Sharwood, 21 May 2018
CCTV camera trained on a garden. Photo by Shutterstock
17

Signal bugs, car hack antics, the Adobe flaw you may have missed, and much more

Roundup Here's your guide to this week's infosec news beyond what we've already covered.
Shaun Nichols, 19 May 2018
frog peers around plant... pic by shutterstock
15

How Google's Smart Compose for Gmail works – and did it fake its robo-caller demo?

Roundup Hello, here's our weekly AI roundup. We have more information on how Google's sentence prediction in Smart Compose for Gmail works, as well as some questions about its Duplex robo-caller system. Also, decision trees to classify the mating calls of frogs and toads to study climate change.
Katyanna Quach, 19 May 2018

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