Paul Kunert

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Paul Kunert is the editor of Channel Register
Call centre worker looks frustrated and unhappy. Photo by Shutterstock

Lloyds Banking Group to hang up on call centre staffers

Call centre staff at Lloyds Banking Group (LBG) are to be axed in the latest expenses purge, company insiders have told us. El Reg understands 95 people based at the Pendeford Business Park in Wolverhampton have been put at risk of redundancy. Pendeford is one of nine call centres the bank operates across the UK. Sources told …
Paul Kunert, 23 Mar 2017
Surprised cat photo via shutterstock

Softcat purrs as customers buy early to dodge Microsoft hikes

Microsoft UK price rises that kicked in at the start of this year weren't bad news for everyone in the country – IT reseller Softcat saw software sales swell as customers purchased licences early to avoid the hefty hike. Back in October, Microsoft said the cost of on-premises and cloud services would rise by 13 and 22 per cent …
Paul Kunert, 22 Mar 2017
IBM REDUNDANCY PROGRAMME BACCARAT - CARD GAME . pic by shutterstock

Calling your redundancy programme Baccarat? Immense Bummer, Management

Word reaches us of Project Baccarat*, IBM’s latest redundancy programme for staffers in the Infrastructure Services Delivery division. In mid-February, Big Blue asked for volunteers among the UK ISD workforce to leave the business with a statutory minimum pay-off, but after a 30-day consultation, the requisite 30 heads had not …
Paul Kunert, 22 Mar 2017

Now UK bans carry-on lappies, phones, slabs on flights from six nations amid bomb fears

The UK has banned airline passengers on direct inbound flights from six countries in the Middle East and North Africa from taking a range of electronic devices into the cabin due to fears of a terrorist attack. The decision, which mirrors a ban by the US Homeland Security from today and which was also based on intelligence …
Paul Kunert, 21 Mar 2017
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Wang, bang, thank you, mang: Acer exec off to sell PCs for Lenovo

The wonderfully named Marco Grieco Wang-Andresen, number two EMEA exec at Acer, is floating across to run rival PC maker Lenovo's ops in the same territory, El Reg can confirm. The latest hire fills the shoes of Francois Bourbons, the previous COO who was last week slotted into the top job in EMEA, following 15 months of …
Paul Kunert, 21 Mar 2017
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Outgoing HPE workers stripped of gym cards and cushy remnants

HPE is ensuring that no unpleasant memories linger for Enterprise Services staff being booted to DXC Technology by informing them they are no longer entitled to membership to the employee discount scheme. In a mail to the great unwashed, HPE UK chief of staff Amanda Hill, said the firm is making "adjustments to the various …
Paul Kunert, 21 Mar 2017
A hand holding an axe in shadow

Safe, staffers? We'll let you know

Staff at Safe Computing - Britain’s nearest equivalent to Workday - are feeling anything but secure about their livelihoods after reading a proposal by their new owner to axe some jobs. Safe, which writes HR, payroll, staffing, financial and background screening software and employed just shy of 200 people across offices in …
Paul Kunert, 20 Mar 2017
Hand pulls on a latex rubber glove (disposable). Photo by shutterstock

FCA straps on rubber gloves, eyes Redcentric's accounting mess

The Financial Conduct Authority is to probe the accounting screw-up at Redcentric that was made public last autumn when the firm admitted to overstating assets and understating net debts by millions of pounds. The London Stock Exchange-listed MSP said it made multi-year number crunching errors that saw net assets exaggerated …
Paul Kunert, 20 Mar 2017
man crying, image via Shutterstock

Fire brigade called to free man's bits from titanium ring's grip

Dublin’s fire brigade - armed with a hand-held angle grinder - were called to the aid of a man that was unable to remove a titanium ring that he’d miraculously slipped over both his meat and two veg. In yet another example of when choking of the bishop goes wrong, the unnamed male presented his problem member to doctors at …
Paul Kunert, 16 Mar 2017

IBM could have made almost all the voluntary redundancies it needed

IBM UK could have almost filled its quota for voluntary redundancies in the Technical Services Support division given the number of folk that had put their hands up to leave, but will make some compulsory cuts instead. An Employee Consultation Committee was created for TSS staff last month, with 47 positions or roughly 10 per …
Paul Kunert, 15 Mar 2017
recruitment_hired

Lenovo EMEA wakes up after five quarters of sliding sales, adds CEO

Lenovo EMEA has dropped its top ops man into the CEO chair following five quarters of shrinking turnover and recent operating losses. Francois Bornibus, charged with igniting the sales engine, will continue to report to president Luca Rossi, who will still hold “overarching” dual responsibility for the region and Latin America …
Paul Kunert, 14 Mar 2017
gushing fire hydrant, photo via Shutterstock

Lawyer defending arson suspect flees court with pants on fire

Following the heat of a courtroom battle a lawyer defending an alleged arsonist was reportedly forced to flee proceedings temporarily after his own pants* caught fire. Miami-based legal eagle Stephen Gutierrez was in the midst of contending that his client’s car had spontaneously combusted and had not been deliberately set on …
Paul Kunert, 10 Mar 2017
man in suit is trapped in a box, Photo by Shutterstock

Vodafone gets less flexible on flexible working Ts&Cs for own staff

Exclusive An April Fool's Day joke has come early for Vodafone teleworkers, who are facing a clampdown on their own flexible working conditions from the start of next month. The telco sells the Better Way of Working (BWOW) “solution” to customers - a mix of tabs, remote access and device management systems. This is supposed to make …
Paul Kunert, 10 Mar 2017

Tesla 'API crashes' after update, angry rich bods complain

Over the past few days Tesla punters from different corners of the globe have claimed an update borked their acess to the iOS app, preventing them from connecting to their electric dream wagons. The thread of complaints first started on Tesla’s online forum on Monday and had continued into today, with customers based in North …
Paul Kunert, 08 Mar 2017
Redundancy

Q: How many IBMers need to volunteer for corporate guillotine?

IBM UK is looking to chop the Technical Services Support team within the Global Technology Services division by up to 10 per cent, according to company insiders. An Employee Consultation Committee, comprised of management and employees elected by their peers to act as workforce reps, was formed last month as the latest expense …
Paul Kunert, 06 Mar 2017
Files in manager's desk drawers: manila folder marked "Redundancies". Image via shutterstock

MP brands 1,600 CSC layoffs as the 'worst excesses of capitalism'

The British government must wake up to service delivery implications of the latest mega-layoff scheming at CSC given the number of sensitive public sector contracts held, and work with the business and others to "root out the worst excesses of capitalism". Or so Toby Perkins, Labour MP for Chesterfield, argued during a House …
Paul Kunert, 06 Mar 2017
Comically sad tearful man doing fake-looking wail of despair. Photo by Shutterstock

Blighty floods with techies' tears as Capita boss Parker quits

Capita chief Andy Parker is stepping off the executive merry-go-round after the little loved outsourcing company today reported financial results that showed a crash in profits - the worst in its corporate history. The London-listed business told the City that costs related to contract delays and weak trade in the technology …
Paul Kunert, 02 Mar 2017
I quit

NCC Group top dog steps down after latest profit warning

Yet another senior exec has fallen on his sword at cybersecurity and managed services outfit NCC Group, just weeks after the latest profit warning. This time around it was CEO Rob Cotton. The Manchester-based business, which also sells software escrow and verification, issued a profit warning on 19 January due to the …
Paul Kunert, 01 Mar 2017
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Fiscal '17 was a record year for us, says Workday CEO

It was a record-breaking year for finance and HR cloud purveyor Workday for all the right and the wrong reasons: sales reached a new high aided by Oracle’s disruptive buy of NetSuite, but losses soared too. Revenues for the firm's fiscal 2017 ended 31 January were $1.569bn, up 35 per cent year-on-year, including subscription …
Paul Kunert, 28 Feb 2017
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IBM UK: Oh, remote workers. We want to be colocated with you again

Exclusive IBM is clamping down on its remote workers in Britain, with the Global Technology Services team being centralised in one of a number of as yet unnamed “colocation hubs”. Tosca Colangeli, IBM’s UK veep of GTS, warned employees in a recording, seen by The Register, that a “big feature” of 2017 is a “desire to be colocated …
Paul Kunert, 28 Feb 2017

Fujitsu staff will strike from midnight over pay, pensions and layoffs

Unionised staff at Fujitsu are downing tools for 24 hours from midnight in protest over cuts to jobs, pay and pensions. It appears the conciliation service ACAS failed to find a common ground that suited all parties. Trade union Unite was unable to say how many of its 1,200 members employed at Fujitsu will be on the picket …
Paul Kunert, 27 Feb 2017

Can you fly with the Vultures? The Reg news desk is hiring

The Register is looking for an experienced reporter to join its lively London news desk. The successful candidate will have a proven track record in building contacts and breaking original articles, and should demonstrate a strong understanding of the tech industry. The Register is renowned for breaking exclusive news stories …
Paul Kunert, 24 Feb 2017

IBM: Voluntary redundo offer? Ticked. Min stat terms? Ticked

Exclusive IBM is hoping to lighten monthly payroll costs by, er, dangling minimum statutory redundancy terms in front of UK staff who volunteer to cut short their career at the creaking tech titan. As El Reg revealed yesterday, Big Blue told staff in the Technical Services Support unit it was forming an Employee Consultation Committee …
Paul Kunert, 23 Feb 2017
Woman packs up contents of desk. Image via shutterstock

IBM to UK staff: Get ready for another game of musical chairs

Exclusive IBM is about to fling another bunch of Technical Services Support staffers down the redundancy chute, internal documents leaked to The Register reveal. In a letter to permanent employees in UK and Ireland, Paul Simmonds, director of TSS, part of Global Technology Services, confirmed the formation of yet another Employee …
Paul Kunert, 22 Feb 2017
Sheaf of £50 notes poised on the rim of a toilet bowl as toilet is flushed. Collage of two photos sourced from Shutterstock

Capita swallows £50m blow after writing down historic contracts

Everyone's favourite cuddly outsourcing corp Capita is writing off a cool £50m worth of assets related to certain deals with customers after a "comprehensive review across its major contracts" base. The listed firm today told the London Stock Exchange that top brass had decided to "impair, at the year end 2016, a number of …
Paul Kunert, 21 Feb 2017

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