Got to dash out for some rubber johnnies? Amazon has a button for that
God help humanity if Wi-Fi goes down
Running out of bog rolls or prophylactics and can’t be bothered to hot foot it to the local shops? Fear not lazy 21st century human, for Amazon has found a solution to a problem that - for most of us - doesn’t exist.
The almighty US retailer has imported the Dash button to the UK, Germany and Austria: a Wi-Fi connected plastic device that allows consumers to order a specific household product at the touch of a... you’ve got it.
There are around 40 buttons at launch including one for Ariel, Nerf, Olay, Playdoh, Kleenex and Durex.
Orders take 24 hours to be delivered so customers entertaining some love-making that evening will either need to pop to the shops to buy condoms in the traditional way or take a cold shower.
Further still, Amazon has confirmed the availability of the Dash Replenishment Service, a cloudy thing that lets home appliance makers allow their connected devices to automatically reorder stuff using APIs.
A button for Finish tabs can be stuck to a dishwasher, Lenor to a washing machine and Durex, er ... a bed post or something else (answers on a post card please readers).
“We’ve all experienced the frustration of running out of something we need - Dash Button and Dash Replenishment Service are designed to make that moment a thing of the past,” said Daniel Rausch, Amazon Dash director.
That is, until the bleeding Wi-Fi goes down and pathetic humans are forced to brave the sunlight and risk coming into contact with others.
"Wonder what happens when a product's button's battery expires and you don't check for an order confirmation email?" said one Reg reader. Well, quite. ®