Danish Sith Lord fined in Galactic Republic rumpus

Disturbance in the peace in far-flung Jutland

The Vulture Central Star Wars Saddometer maxxed out at 10 today at the news that Danish police rushed to a house in Jutland over the weekend to break up a heated argument between two teenage lads regarding the exact strength of the Galactic Republic.

According to The Local, cops rolled up at the premises in Fredericia at 5.10am on Sunday morning, following reports by neighbours of a right rumpus.

Police spokesman Peter Balsgaard explained: “We did indeed encounter two people who were yelling and screaming at each other. It turned out to be two people who knew each other but were in an extremely drunken state.”

He elaborated: "And the thing they were so loudly discussing were their differing opinions on the strength of the Republic in Star Wars."

Officers decided to settle the matter by fining the gobbiest participant for disturbing the force peace, but he at first refused to give his earthly name, preferring to identify himself as "Count Dooku".

However, the police used unspecified techniques to persuade him to reveal his true identity, at which point he was fined.

Happily, that appears to have been an end to the matter. Those readers wondering just how bad disagreements over works of fiction can get are directed to the 2012 case of the Long Island man who shot his girlfriend in the back for disagreeing that a Walking Dead-style zombie apocalypse might become a reality. ®


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