Darth Vader mounts defence of doomed empire
'We shall double our efforts,' gasp worried Dixons staff
Dixons Retail is turning to the dark side this Christmas by hiring jackbooted camp war mongerer Darth Vader to star in a marketing campaign.
The parent of Currys and PC World wants to make hard-pressed shoppers aware of improvements in customer service at its chains, though Vader is a strange choice as he couldn't muster his troops to secure one Death Star from rebel raiders nor finish building a replacement.
The Reg was told the marketing drive kicks off this Saturday, with the first ad scheduled for evening peak time – during The X Factor.
The ad, which will run for three weeks, will retell the classic scene from Return of the Jedi when Vader flies to the Death Star to check build-time SLAs – however Dixons version will be set at a Curry's store in Thurrock, also home to all manner of other world creatures.
Dixons marketing manager Andrea Silver said: "We have invested a huge amount in our staff training and development."
Last year, the retailer recruited R2D2 and C3PO, who were "amazed at the brilliant technology on offer" after breaking into one of its megastores … so that's where England's rioters got the idea.
George Lucas will clearly not be sat in the director's chair so the ads could actually be more meaningful than the last generation of Star Wars films he made. ®