Top stories

Q. What's today's top language? A. Python... no, wait, Java... no, C

Just learn them all and stop worrying about the popularity contest

DeepMind says it's given AI an imagination. Let's take a closer look at that

Google's machine-learning gurus see promise in simulated creativity

Intel is upset that Qualcomm is treating it like Intel treated AMD for years and years

Chipzilla takes number, joins queue to kick Snapdragon biz in the ball arrays

Silicon Valley IT biz boss cops to lying about Cisco H-1B jobs

Personal Tech

Judge uses 1st Amendment on Pokemon Go park ban. It's super effective!

County had hoped to protect land from gamer stampede
65 Comments
22 Jul 13:08
Bootnotes

Fan of FBI cosplay? Enjoy freaking out your neighbors? Have we got the eBay auction for you

Get this retired surveillance van for all your totally legitimate above-board activities
23 Comments
21 Jul 23:28
Personal Tech

The Italian Jobs: Bloke thrown in the cooler for touting Apple knockoffs

Feds made Naples man an offer he can't refuse
16 Comments
21 Jul 22:14
Personal Tech

Intel is upset that Qualcomm is treating it like Intel treated AMD for years and years

Chipzilla takes number, joins queue to kick Snapdragon biz in the ball arrays
20 Comments
21 Jul 21:55
Artificial Intelligence

DeepMind says it's given AI an imagination. Let's take a closer look at that

Google's machine-learning gurus see promise in simulated creativity
17 Comments
21 Jul 21:06
Personal Tech

China censors drop the soap operas, sitcoms

AnalysisThat's the bad news. The good news is they've banned Bieber, too
44 Comments
21 Jul 20:29

Don't miss Alphabay shutdown: Bad boys, bad boys, what you gonna do? Not use your Hotmail...

Personal Tech

Andy Rubin's overhyped and underdelivered Essential phone out 'in a few weeks'

At this point does anyone still care?
24 Comments
21 Jul 19:38
Business

Silicon Valley IT biz boss cops to lying about Cisco H-1B jobs

Consulting firm fibbed about hirings to import more workers
17 Comments
21 Jul 19:13
Policy

Google, Amazon, Apple, Facebook blow massive amounts lobbying Trump administration

You know what they say: Money makes the world go round
17 Comments
21 Jul 18:32
Storage

Pull on yer wellies and let's wade through the week's storage news

But Muuuuuum...
21 Jul 15:04
Policy

Legal boffins poke holes in EU lawmaker's ePrivacy proposals

Recommend amendments on privacy, tracking and encryption
21 Jul 14:08
Storage
Pinky and the Brain

What is this – some kind of flashy, 3-bit consumer SSD? Eh, Seagate?

Nytro new PC disk replacement line of SSDs
12 Comments
21 Jul 13:27
Security

But how does our ransomware make you feel?

Psychology of ransomware threats unpicked
10 Comments
21 Jul 12:58
Artificial Intelligence

Why you'll never make really big money as an AI dev

Artificial Intelligence? How the future was back in the '80s
22 Comments
21 Jul 12:23
Personal Tech

I've got a verbal govt contract for Hyperloop, claims His Muskiness

World+dog: Oh no you haven't!
58 Comments
21 Jul 12:04
Business

Vodafone reports sliding revenues but customers don't hate them as much

And India still a mighty struggle
15 Comments
21 Jul 11:38
Business

Dump X of your crew, DXC Technologies UK told. Hundreds face axe AGAIN

Exclusive'Please stop leaking info to The Reg,' says UK boss
34 Comments
21 Jul 11:26
Artificial Intelligence

Shut up and take my money! AI luminaries go gooey for Graphcore's smart chip tech

Investors shove another $30m into Bristolian startup's mitts
21 Jul 11:03
Bootnotes

Volterman 'super wallet': The worst crowdsource video pitch of all time?

The cringe is strong with this one
55 Comments
21 Jul 10:29
Personal Tech

Virgin Media broadband latency headaches still not fixed six months on

Promises firmware fix for superhub 3/Intel's Puma 6 'shortly'
38 Comments
21 Jul 09:58
Geek's Guide

Reg reader turns Geek's Guides to Britain into Geek's Map of Britain

Too lazy to plug GPS co-ords into satnav? Fear not, gypsythief has saved you
36 Comments
21 Jul 09:27
Software

Ten new tech terms I learnt this summer: Do you know them all?

Something for the Weekend, Sir?Let's assume you've already heard of 'clickbait headline'
131 Comments
21 Jul 09:11
Software

You can't DevOps everything, kids. Off the shelf kit especially

CommentWaterfalling for the, er, 'boring' stuff
10 Comments
21 Jul 08:34
Software
Footprints sand photo via Shutterstock

The lady (or man) vanishes: The thorny issue of GDPR coding

The Devil is in the enhanced data model
37 Comments
21 Jul 08:03
Business
Pizza and beer - friends forever

User filed fake trouble tickets to take helpful sysadmin to lunches

On-CallReg reader was shouted at for a problem the customer created, but won his respect and apologies
108 Comments
21 Jul 07:33
Emergent Tech

Boffins back bubbles for better bonding with beautiful belongings

AKA how to watermark 3D printed stuff with air bubbles
14 Comments
21 Jul 07:01
Software

Q. What's today's top language? A. Python... no, wait, Java... no, C

Just learn them all and stop worrying about the popularity contest
139 Comments
21 Jul 06:29
Bootnotes

Burglary, robbery, kidnapping and a shoot-out over… a domain name?!

When transfers go really, really wrong, allegedly
23 Comments
21 Jul 06:02
Security

Moneysupermarket fined £80,000 for spamming seven million customers

Go compare the original opt-out request, firm told
33 Comments
21 Jul 05:32
Bootnotes

Authorities go hard on coffee maker for stiff Viagra-powered brew

Is that a DIMM in your pocket or have you been at this banned bean again?
33 Comments
21 Jul 05:03
Virtualization

Microsoft finally allows hosted desktops on multi-tenant hardware

Windows 10 enterprise licences to gain virtualization rights, plus roaming to personal devices
10 Comments
21 Jul 04:02
Networks

Bluetooth makes a mesh of itself with new spec

Up to 32,000 nodes without routers in the middle and battery life measured in years
10 Comments
21 Jul 02:58
Business

ServiceNow stops over in Jakarta on its journey to AI-land

SaaS-y business process simplifier adds security chat rooms, cloud management and more to new release
21 Jul 02:04
Cloud

They say we're too mean to Microsoft. Well, how about this... Redmond just had a stonking year. And only 8% tax. Whee!

Paid -17% tax rate for Q4 despite making $72m every day
50 Comments
21 Jul 00:58
Security

So, FCC, how about that massive DDoS? Hello? Hello...? You still there?

UpdatedLike trying to get blood out of a stone
20 Comments
20 Jul 22:27
Security

US Homeland Sec boss has snazzy new laptop bomb scanning tech – but admits he doesn't know what it's called

Fscking nerds, Secretary John Kelly sighs
44 Comments
20 Jul 22:01
Security

Alphabay shutdown: Bad boys, bad boys, what you gonna do? Not use your Hotmail...

Analysis...or the Feds will get you ♪
49 Comments
20 Jul 20:28
Emergent Tech

Death to strap-ons, says Intel, yet thrusts its little AI stick into us all

Behold, the neural network gizmo Chipzilla will quietly kill in two years, like its wearables
11 Comments
20 Jul 20:14
Software

Second one this month: Another code bootcamp decamps to graveyard

'Unable to find a sustainable model' complains crashed programming crash course
13 Comments
20 Jul 19:48
Security
phishing

UK uni warns students of phishers trying to nick their tuition fees

♪ You shall have a phishy on a little dishy when the hack comes in
13 Comments
20 Jul 19:18
Artificial Intelligence

Huawei reckons it can strong ARM its way into AI world with new chips

We're assuming Chinese giant will use ARM in ML processors. It probably will, right?
20 Jul 18:32
Business

Toshiba's spat with WDC over chip biz is now a song of strife and ire

Court orders only prolong bid process, and winter is coming
20 Jul 16:33
Servers

White boxer is a white racker: Supermicro touts Rack Scale Design

VBlock-like converged systems
20 Jul 16:04

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