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Ralph Wiggum as Hamlet, ready to stab

What's it like to work for a genius and Olympic archer who's mates with Richard Branson?

On-Call Welcome back to On-Call, our Friday glimpse at readers' tales of being asked to fix the ridiculous. This week, reader “Alien8” shared a story about “One of the worst jobs I ever had” doing “IT support at a fulfilment house.” The big problem here was his boss, the IT manager, who Alien8 says just made stuff up all the time. …

Swiss rolls into HPE: Micro-Veeam clone Trilead gobbled

HPE has bought Switzerland-based Trilead, according to Trilead's home page. Trilead's VM Explorer is a backup product for VMware's ESXi and Microsoft Hyper-V users. It comes in Free, Pro (£520.00 / US$790), and Enterprise (£990.00 / US$1,460) editions. The latest release introduced automatic backup testing, cloud backup, a …
Chris Mellor, 5 Feb 2016

Rkt container runtime leaves the launchpad

CoreOS has decided that rkt, its open source container, is fit for production purposes and therefore ready to fly as version 1.0. Rkt is an alternative to Docker's file format and runtime that, as we wrote at its launch, tries to knock off Docker's rough edges with special attention to security while making it possible to run …
Nile_Delta

Yes or no: D@RE is a bonkers name for EMC's enterprise encryption

With ECS v2.2, EMC has improved its storage efficiency, searchability and security, we're told. EMC's ECS (elastic cloud storage) is a software-defined, object-based cloud storage platform that can scale up to exabyte levels. The company launched ECS, previously known as Project Nile, in May, 2014. ECS 2.2 adds three things …
Chris Mellor, 5 Feb 2016
Screaming kid

Teradataaaaargghh! How to go from years in the black right into the red

Data warehouser and analyzer Teradata is suffering still. It's made a full-year loss as fourth-quarter 2015 revenues continued a multi-quarter tumble. Sales were $719m, down 6 percent year-on-year, and full year revenues of $2.53bn were down 7 per cent year-on-year. The fourth quarter net income was a profit of $41m, 65.3 per …
Chris Mellor, 4 Feb 2016

Flash array biz Tegile swings axe on staff

Exclusive Today we learned hybrid and all-flash array supplier Tegile has sacked half its staff in the UK, and all its staff in the Netherlands. It had only just recently opened its Dutch office. Rob Commins, Tegile’s veep for marketing, told El Reg: “First and foremost, we had an excellent fiscal 2016 that we just wrapped up on January …
Chris Mellor, 4 Feb 2016
Off_shore_drilling_rig

The fracking oil price drop whacked Panasas – who's next in energy IT?

NAS appliance maker Panasas was forced to restructure after falling oil prices caused its customers in the energy sector to spend less on its technology. That's why executives fled the building, and why other staff have been let go. CEO Faye Pairman said Panasas has a long-standing strategy of diversifying into vertical …
Chris Mellor, 4 Feb 2016
Phoenix

Druva shows us its DRaaS and it's full of BADness

Druva is adding Disaster Recovery (DR) functionality to Phoenix, its converged cloud-based data protection system for enterprises. Phoenix provides backup and archival of both physical and virtual server environments direct to the (AWS) cloud. It can now provide backup, archive and DR all at once. A differential backup is …
Chris Mellor, 4 Feb 2016

Xitore slings 4 million IOPS box under its arm, strides out into the light

Flash DIMM startup Xitore is exiting stealth before it has raised a dime and is looking for funding. The company was started up in March 2014 by CEO Mike Amidi and CTO Hossein Hashemi. Amidi has worked at STEC, SMART, Netlist, and WD, where he was director of the program management office in the Solid State Storage BU. At …
Chris Mellor, 4 Feb 2016

How a power blip briefly broke GitHub's boxes and tripped it offline

Exactly how a momentary power failure managed to trigger a two-hour GitHub outage has been revealed in full today. The popular and widely used source-code-hosting service fell off the internet last Wednesday, and soon after blamed the downtime on a "brief power disruption at our primary data center" that "caused a cascading …

Barracuda kills CudaDrive and Copy cloud storage services

Barracuda Networks' financial woes look to be biting, as the company has announced it is killing its cloud storage services, CudaDrive and Copy.com, and focussing resources on stuff that really matters. The company has blogged the news, with Rod Mathews - veep and general manager of the company's storage business – saying …
Computer with dead bug, Stacy Brunner CC2 license

Cisco splats Nexus, APIC, and security manager bugs

Grab the Cisco-branded fly-swatter, it's time for your weekly bug-splat. Top of the list are four high-severity bugs, in Nexus 9000 switches, security managers, and application policy controllers. The Nexus 9000 ACI Mode Switch has an issue in its ICMP implementation, remotely exploitable to cause a denial-of-service. An …
Parallels remote application server bringing windows server to a Mac

Parallels opens new Windows with app virtualistion upgrade

Early in 2015, junior virtualiser Parallels acquired a remote application delivery company called 2X software. This week, 2X's assets have landed in the 15th and newest version of Parallels' Remote Application Server. Combining the two products means Remote Application Server is now far better at delivering apps and desktops …

Cisco borgs IoT outfit Jasper Tech for US$1.4 billion

Internet of Things service platform outfit Jasper Technologies has fallen into the maw of Cisco for US$1.4 billion. Twelve-year-old Jasper started life as a machine-to-machine wireless comms specialist (Jasper Wireless) before changing its name in 2014. According to Cisco's blog post about the acquisition, Jasper has 3,500- …
Business people move through revolving door. Photo via Shutterstock

All is not well on Mount Panasas: Five execs eject amid refocus

Exclusive Panasas – the privately owned hybrid scale-out NAS appliance supplier – has suffered exec exits and is refocussing, but so far won't say what its new strategy is. We contacted the firm after hearing rumors from a senior industry source about IP sales, but it was unable to respond until February 4. We did pick up hints of some …
Chris Mellor, 3 Feb 2016

Google licks its lips at sight of Qualcomm's 64-bit server ARM chips

Google is reportedly about to give a conditional thumbs up to Qualcomm's 64-bit ARM chips for servers. San Diego-headquartered Qualy showed off prototype 24-core ARMv8 processors in October. At the time, Qualcomm's Anand Chandrasekher said the chips will try to balance "performance, acceptable power-compute density, and cost …
Pentaho_chord_visualisation

Big daddy HDS shows off fruits of Big Data slurpee Pentaho

A refreshed HSP 400 series, HDS’ scale-out analytics appliance, has native integration with the Pentaho Enterprise Platform. HDS slurped up Pentaho in February 2015 to acquire big data integration and predictive analysis technology. The software amalgamates multi-source data from, for example, Hadoop (Cloudera, Hortonworks and …
Chris Mellor, 3 Feb 2016
Wall St bull image via Shutterstock

NetApp Hitz out at critics over the flashy SolidFire buyout deal

Comment NetApp co-founder Dave Hitz has blogged about the closing of the Solidfire deal and castrated any misleading bull* about NetApp’s flash strategy. Hitz says he admires Solidfire’s architectural design, writing: “SolidFire’s architectural choices are elegant and made for a reason. (This is the geeky paragraph, so skip on if it …
Chris Mellor, 3 Feb 2016
ioSafe BDR 515 Stock Image

ioSafe releases x86 server for the 'we don't have a geek with a screwdriver' crowd

Review ioSafe, which you may remember from a delightful prior experiment in which I set one of its storage units on fire has launched a new product. This delightful new device, the BDR 515, is based on a dual core Intel i5 platform with 16GB of RAM and runs a full version of Windows Server 2012 R2 Standard. BDR in this case can be …
Trevor Pott, 3 Feb 2016
Mike_Munoz

PernixData scoops new head of sales from Nimble

VMware distributed hypervisor cacher PernixData has recruited Mike Munoz to run its sales organisation as Chief Revenue Officer.* Munoz is stepping into a hot seat vacated by Ted Stinson back in July 2015, and he has a great CV: VP Sales at Nimble Storage – Feb 2010 - Nov 2014 Divisional VP Sales, Data Domain – 2004 - 2010 …
Chris Mellor, 3 Feb 2016
Satan in Hell from South Park

Cisco slings speedier SAN switches

Cisco's taken the whip to the FibreChannel horse, shipping a bunch of kit ready for the next iteration of the venerable storage area network (SAN) standard. In the kind of cutesy marketing-speak that makes people want to set fire to blog posts, The Borg reckons its 32G-ready, 768-16G-port MDS 9718 Director is called “the beast …
Welcome to Amazon Workspaces

A virtual phone inside a virtual cloud desktop is now an actual thing

Amazon Web Services has tweaked its Workspaces cloudy virtual desktops service, adding the ability to voice-over-internet-protocol (VoIP) software. The company says it's now possible to take audio from whatever client device you use to run Workspaces' client app, then pipe it Skype, Lync or WebEx running on the cloudy virtual …

Japanese wireless boffins demo 56Gbps fibre replacement*

Come close. No, closer. Much closer: Fujitsu and the Tokyo Institute of Technology have demonstrated millimetre-wave transmissions operating at an eye-watering 56Gbps, over a far-less-impressive 10cm. Probably more impressive is that they did it with a CMOS transceiver that puts the "broad" into broadband processing: the chip …

International Trade Commission pens patent love letter to Cisco

The International Trade Commission has handed Cisco another gun to fire at antagonist Arista, finding that the latter violated three Cisco software patents. The patents in question cover router management (US 7,162,537), and private VLANs (US 6,741,592 and 7,200,145). Since Cisco reckons Arista's in violation of twelve …
Sydney Harbour Bridge in the cloud

A tech conference without corporate yadda yadda? Yes, it exists

Dozens of conferences ask you to take a day out of your busy schedule, then don't do much more than bore you with derivative disruption-speak delivered by suits. VMware User Group (VMUG) Conferences are different, because VMware's users pick the content and look for material that interests real IT pros. So instead of a day …
Team Register, 2 Feb 2016
ABC logo

ABC storage project adrift in 'brown ocean'

A project to replace storage underpinning edit suites and video storage at the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC) is not going smoothly, with newly-acquired storage systems shelved before user acceptability testing. The Register understands that Hitachi Data Systems (HDS) is the main player in a four-company consortium …
DVD it in many colours

IBM's Spectrum Scale gets see-through cloud tiering

IBM's Spectrum Scale parallel file system offering is going to support direct integration of Cleversafe, SoftLayer cloud, and Amazon S3 object storage. Cleversafe, SoftLayer and S3 become target stores for Spectrum Scale data in the same way, IBM says, as any local disk store. It's at pains to stress that this is not a gateway …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
suicidal_clown_shutterstock_ORIGINAL SIZE_DO_NOT_USE

See that fist punching through the clouds? That's Veeam's, that is

You've got to have sympathy for Veeam's competitors. Ratmir Timashev's storage upstart pulled off another slam dunk quarter to close 2015. As Barracuda looks for a sale, Seagate sells off EVault, and Veritas flails helplessly, Veeam rockets on, telling everybody it has: A 22 per cent increase in total bookings revenue to $ …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
Sunset in Niger, a tree silhouetted against a sunset in the Sahara desert. Photo via Shutterstock

IBM blesses Catalogic's ECX copy data management

Catalogic has finally managed to get IBM on board its in-place ECX copy data management train. Big Blue and Little C are saying that the following IBM arrays are supported with ECX: Storwize hybrid arrays SAN Volume Controller FlashSystem V9000 SoftLayer – with ECX helping to reduce wasteful and redundant data storage in …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
Cloudian Samurai

Cloudian's better at Amazon S3 than anyone else, apparently

Comment Object storage startup Cloudian says it's the most S3-compliant of all object-storage vendors, and this really, really, really matters. We had our ears bent by Cloudian's sales VP, Jon Ash, about this, after asking why on Earth it mattered. First of all, it needs pointing out that there is no industry standard for Amazon S3, …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
storage arrays superimposed on cloudy sky

Embattled Barracuda Networks looks for buyer – report

Barracuda Networks, with its back against the wall after a string of poor quarters and collapsing stock price, is reportedly looking for a buyer. According to Bloomberg, Barracuda engaged with Morgan Stanley to look for a buyer some months ago. The company provides data protection and security products for small and medium …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
Gridstore HCA

Backers fling cash at Gridstore for Hyper-V hyper-converged development

Gridstore, the Hyper-V-focused hyper-converged appliance startup, has snagged a $19m funding C-round. It also has a new chairman of the board and director plus three execs to help it push ahead. The funding comes after an $11m B-round in 2013 and comes from Atlantic Bridge Capital along with current investors: Acero Capital, …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016

Lawyers cast fishing nets in class-action Seagate seas

Hear that siren? It's an ambulance chaser. Seagate is facing a class-action lawsuit from lawyers representing one pissed-off Barracuda disk drive user – and they want more people to join in. Acting on behalf of one Christopher A. Nelson of South Dakota, the lawyers say the drives failed more often than they should have been …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
Battleship broadside

Syncer and (flash) shipper feeling chipper: We're going great guns

Private equity-owned file sync 'n' sharer Syncplicity and flash array shipper Kaminario both say they are doing well. Syncplicity was sold off by EMC to Skyview Capital last June, and focuses on enterprises and their mobile device users, paying attention to security needs. CEO Jonathan Huberman says Syncplicity's new bookings …
Chris Mellor, 2 Feb 2016
ExaNeSt Logo

Exascale project wants machine with TEN MEEELLION ARMS

Europe's ExaNeSt project is looking behind the couch for ten million ARM processors, to support its exascale supercomputing project. As well as a bucket of processing, what it's calling its “straw-man prototype” will use liquid cooling, Flash memory in the processor fabric, and will use “innovative, fast interconnects” to …

Google adds lots of cloudy flash, no sign of saviour

Google's a laggard in infrastructure-as-a-service: Amazon Web Services moved first and set agendas, then along came Microsoft with an unusually strong version 1.0 product that's just kept growing and adding features. IBM bought SoftLayer and is building cloud products at speed. The Alphabet subsidiary’s now third or fourth in …
NASA's Mike Krainak with the silicon-photonic chip

NASA preps silicon-photonic modem for space laser internet test

NASA's preparing the next step of its lasers-in-space optical communications strategy, announcing the development of a silicon photonic modem for space applications. The agency's engineering team is getting ready to build the modem, which integrates electrical and optical signalling and processing on a single chip. The news …
EMC Cork's DSSD D5 unit

We've just stepped out of our time machine, and we can reveal ... EMC's new kit for early 2016

Analysis EMC has new storage products coming in both external shared array form and in its converged and hyper-converged systems lines of products, using new VSAN capabilities. These will be announced over the next two quarters and will change the shape of EMC's product lines. We think we now have an overall view of what the mainstream …
Chris Mellor, 1 Feb 2016

How Symantec scuppered Veritas sell-off six ways to Sunday

A champagne bottle's crack, a splash, and cheers rang out as the good ship Veritas was launched on the banks of Symantec's river – sent off to steam the data storage seas own with a new owner: the Carlyle Group. It's had an inauspicious launch: Symantec had to cut the price tag for Veritas by $800m due to "uncertainties" and a …
Chris Mellor, 1 Feb 2016
Dandelion, image via Shutterstock

Oracle hires cloud 'success' pushers, denies EMEA customers are floating away

Oracle is expanding its platform-as-a-service cloud team in Europe, but denied it is a move to revive renewals. The database giant confirmed it is hiring 150 people across EMEA to join the firm’s Customer "Success" programme under Carmen Romero. Oracle told The Register the move is in response to growing customer demand and …
Gavin Clarke, 1 Feb 2016
Mangstor NX6320

Here's to Hu: QLogic beats expectations as it waits for new CEO

Storage connectivity card and ASIC supplier QLogic had a much better third quarter than expected as interim CEO, also chief financial officer, Jean Hu delivered higher revenues and a profits recovery. The revenue number was $122.7m, 18.6 per cent more than the previous quarter, and higher than the guidance issued for the …
Chris Mellor, 1 Feb 2016
virus_1_648

EU agency warns of cyber risks from using big data tools

Businesses that use software and systems to collect, analyse and use data are increasingly vulnerable to cyber risks, according to a new report. The European Network and Information Security Agency (ENISA) urged companies to embrace "the security-by-default principle" to better safeguard data and systems against privacy and …
OUT-LAW.COM, 1 Feb 2016