Data Centre > BOFH

Two beer glasses clash and splash frothy beer into the air. Cheers! Photo by Shutterstock

BOFH: Free as in free beer or... Oh. 'Free Upgrade'

Episode 10 Episode 10
Simon Travaglia, 22 Jul 11:00
Smiling man wears VR headset against backdrop of city. Photo by Shutterstock

BOFH: I found a flying Dragonite on a Windows 2003 domain

Episode 9 Episode 9
Simon Travaglia, 15 Jul 09:05
Man shreds documents. Photo by Shutterstock

BOFH: Follow the paper trail

Episode 8 "We were wondering.. what you were doing with... the storeroom?" the Boss asks.
Simon Travaglia, 17 Jun 09:01
Techie wields circular saw while standing over the innards of a workstation. Photo by Shutterstock

BOFH: What's your point, caller?

Episode 7 Episode 7 "Well I'm... pretty sure I didn't get it!" the PFY says, motioning his mouse aimlessly around the screen for a bit while lazing back in his chair. "Have you tried rebooting your machine?"
Simon Travaglia, 03 Jun 09:33
Ozzy Osbourne performing live with his bassist Blasko in 2013. Photo by Harmony Gerber,  Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic

BOFH: Thermo-electric funeral

Episode 6 Episode 6 "So all I need is the data from yesterday and maybe the day before," the Boss says, handing over his pride and joy.
Simon Travaglia, 22 Apr 11:02

BOFH: If you liked it then you should've put the internet in it

Episode 5 "Wah wah wah wah wah..."
Simon Travaglia, 15 Apr 11:01
Angry man yelling on phone while reading vintage printer paper report. Photo by SHutterstock

BOFH: Sure, I could make your cheapo printer perform miracles

Episode 4 It's yet another one of those Fridays where ALL I NEED TO DO IS MAKE IT TO 4pm..
Simon Travaglia, 08 Apr 11:15

BOFH: This laptop has ceased to be. And it's pub o'clock soon

Episode 3 Episode 3 You know what it's like. The Boss asks you some technical question, you give him a non-technical answer and he suddenly thinks you're lying to him – or worse – that you don't know what you're talking about.
Simon Travaglia, 26 Feb 14:19
Kevin Steen hitting Adam Cole with a superkick at the Ring of Honor tapings held at the Ted Reeve Arena in Toronto. Pic by Tabercil, licensed under CC 3.0

BOFH: In-depth IT training needs a single-malt distillery

Episode 2 Episode 2
Simon Travaglia, 29 Jan 12:00

BOFH: I want no memory of this pointless conversation. Alcohol please

Episode 1 Episode 1
Simon Travaglia, 22 Jan 14:11

BOFH: Taking a spin in a decommissioned racer? On your own grill cam be it

Episode 18 Episode 18
Simon Travaglia, 04 Dec 11:34

BOFH: How long does it take to complete Friday's lager-related tasks?

Episode 17 Episode 17
Simon Travaglia, 27 Nov 10:02

BOFH: We're miracle workers. But you want us to fix THAT in 10 minutes?

Episode 16 "What do you mean 'why's it not working'," the PFY asks.
Simon Travaglia, 13 Nov 12:58

BOFH: I'm not doing this for the benefit of your health, you know

Episode 15 Episode 15 "Is he still there?" I ask the PFY, maintaining direct eye contact with him so that I can truthfully claim that I didn't see the Health and Safety guy hanging around the hallway to Mission Control like a bad smell.
Simon Travaglia, 25 Sep 11:39

BOFH: Press 1. Press 2. Press whatever you damn well LIKE

Episode 14 Episode 14 "You're the one who wanted it," I tell the Boss in response to his fuming.
Simon Travaglia, 18 Sep 12:25

BOFH: Power corrupts, uninterrupted power corrupts absolutely

Episode 13 Episode 13 "THE POWER'S OUT!" the Boss shouts, blundering into Mission Control like a robotic vacuum in super-random turbo mode. "THE TRANSFORMER DOWN THE ROAD HAS EXPLO... hey, why are your lights still on?"
Simon Travaglia, 04 Sep 11:57

BOFH: An architect and his own entirely avoidable downfall

Episode 12 Episode 12
Simon Travaglia, 28 Aug 12:57

BOFH: Why, I LOVE work courses. Please tell me more, o wise one!

Episode 11 Episode 11 "... and so we thought that you might like to attend this two-day workshop in effective leadership techniques," the Boss burbles, rounding off the professional goal-setting exercise that company policy obliges him to do with me and any other contractor with a contract that's rolled over for more than five years.
Simon Travaglia, 14 Aug 13:01

BOFH: Knitting bobble hats on the steps of the guillotine

Episode 10 Episode 10 "Good news!" the Boss blurts, rocketing into Mission Control in a frenzy, “I’m going to be heading a new working party to improve website usability."
Simon Travaglia, 07 Aug 13:01

BOFH: My diary is MINE and mine alone, you petty HR gimps

Episode 9 Episode 9 "Wow, that's like the Matrix!" the Director's PA gasps.
Simon Travaglia, 31 Jul 11:38

BOFH: Don't go changing on Friday evenings, I don't wanna work that hard

Episode 8 Episode 8 "It's just a small change!" the Boss whines.
Simon Travaglia, 26 Jun 11:38

BOFH: Step into my office. Now take a deep breath

Episode 7 Episode 7
Simon Travaglia, 05 Jun 15:21

BOFH: Getting to the brown, nutty heart of the water cooler matter

Episode 6 Episode 6 "..and so we just mix all the ingredients together like this, tip it out onto a surface like so, and roll it into a roughly cylindrical shape. Now we just push in the extras and then pop it into the freezer for a few hours till it's nice and hard and easy to handle. And we're done," the PFY says with a flourish.
Simon Travaglia, 15 May 13:58

BOFH: Explain? All we need is this kay-sh with DDR3 Cortexiphan ...

Episode 5 The PFY has crossed the line. Even though he knows better, he's attempted to explain something technical to management.
Simon Travaglia, 18 Apr 09:00

BOFH: Never mind that old brick, look at this ink-stained BEAUTY

Episode 4 Episode 4 *Crash!* "Oh, I'm terribly sorry, I appear to have accidentally nudged it off the table" I say, as tears well up in the owner's eyes.
Simon Travaglia, 27 Mar 16:21

BOFH: Mmm, gotta love me some fresh BYOD dog roll

Episode 3 Episode 3 "Oh, Bring Your Own DEVICE!" the PFY blurts in mock realisation.
Simon Travaglia, 20 Mar 15:01

BOFH: The ONE-NINE uptime solution

Episode 2 Episode 2
Simon Travaglia, 27 Feb 16:30

BOFH: The Great HellDesk geek leave seek

Episode 1 Episode 1
Simon Travaglia, 20 Feb 14:57
Stained glass angels

BOFH: A miracle on PFY Street

Episode 17 Episode 17
Simon Travaglia, 26 Dec 17:33
Chicken Jalfrezi and rice with a beer. Pic by Shutterstock

BOFH: Capo di tutti capi, bah. I'm having CHICKEN JALFREZI

Episode 16 Episode 16
Simon Travaglia, 13 Dec 11:30
Santa Claus on his laptop

BOFH: Santa, bloody Santa

Episode 15 Episode 15
Simon Travaglia, 06 Dec 11:00

BOFH: Everyone deserves a little DOWNTIME

Episode 14 Episode 14
Simon Travaglia, 28 Nov 12:01
Cthulu springs from desktop printer

BOFH: WHERE did this 'fax-enabled' printer UPGRADE come from?

Episode 13 Episode 13
Simon Travaglia, 22 Nov 08:00
Milla Jovovich in Resident Evil

BOFH: An UNHOLY MATCH forged amid the sweet smell of bullsh*t

Episode 12 Episode 12
Simon Travaglia, 15 Nov 10:00

BOFH: SOOO... You want to sell us some antivirus software?

Episode 11 Episode 11
Simon Travaglia, 08 Nov 09:00
big red wheelie bin and pallet full of rubbish in London street

BOFH: Stop your tiers – when it comes to storage, LESS is MORE

Episode 10 Episode 10
Simon Travaglia, 01 Nov 07:00
Confused computer keyboard

BOFH: The current value of our IT ASSets? Minus eleventy-seven...

Episode 9 Episode 9
Simon Travaglia, 29 Aug 12:19

BOFH: We CAN do that with a Raspberry Pi, but think of the BODIES

Episode 8 Episode 8 "So what we'd like to do is have the lights turn on in the foyer when people come into the office," the Health and Safety rep says.
Simon Travaglia, 23 Aug 09:00

BOFH: The Great Backup BACKDOWN

Episode 7 Episode 7
Simon Travaglia, 01 Aug 10:28

BOFH: You can take our lives, but you'll never take OUR MACROS

Episode 6 Episode 6
Simon Travaglia, 27 Jun 10:18

BOFH: On the contrary, we LOVE rebranding here at the IT dept

Episode 5 Episode 5
Simon Travaglia, 13 Jun 06:01

BOFH: Oh DO tell us what you think. *CLICK*

Episode 4 Episode 4
Simon Travaglia, 17 Apr 07:03