Yummy Claire gets in touch with The Reg

Well, following on from the Claire swallowing saga that is currently doing the rounds on email, we have found two so-called responses from Ms Swire herself.

Of course, what you have to bear in mind is that the Christmas party season has kicked off and so young professionals staggering back from long, boozy lunches are liable to spend more time knocking out daft fake replies than do the work they're paid to do.

And so we lead to the "responses".

Claire, an Excite account, says:

"I can't believe this!!!

"First of all, I don't know any of you!! What do you care about my social life? Don't you sad bastards have anything better to do with your time? Shouldn't you all be working. I'm going to make it a point to send this email to your company just so that people can see what you do with your time!

"To you Girls: You've all swallowed at one time or another, so don't judge me!

"To the Guys: All you're going to get is a fantasy, so go do what you're good at... tossers!

"Yum!

"Claire"

Claire, on a Freeserve account, however, says:

"You may be one of the people who has been 'privileged' to receive a rather childish e-mail which has been doing the rounds from my time at Norton Rose.

"For the record: yes I exist; yes I used to work at Norton Rose; and yes I told a guy his cum was "yum". But for God's sake, grow up! It was yum! I'm not ashamed of that. And for all you guys who thought this was all a hoot, let me ask you this: which one of you has never told a girl that your cum tastes great or that its full of proteins/good for your hair/excellent skin conditioner etc etc or basically any old lie which gets your girl for the night to take it in the mouth?

"So don't laugh at me, but rather laugh at yourself for the pathetic lengths to which you are prepared to go in order to get yourself a lousy blow job from some syphilitic ridden piece of scrag. Have a great day. And by the way, working for Norton Rose sucks more than I could ever manage!!"
So there you have it. Hope that makes everything clear. ®

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