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James Bond's metal-toothed nemesis Richard Kiel dies at 74

Obituary Richard Kiel, the actor who played imposing metal-toothed henchman Jaws in two James Bond films, has died aged 74. Kiel appeared in the Roger Moore maritime and space capers The Spy Who Loved Me in 1977 and Moonraker, two years later. His character joined a very short list of competent adversaries to grapple with and give HM’s …
Gavin Clarke, 11 Sep 2014
Doctor Who meme

BBC Trust candidate defends licence fee, says evaders are CRIMINALS

The Government's choice for BBC chairman defended the licence fee, criminal penalties for non-payers, and digital "education" initiatives before MPs today. BBC executives will have been delighted by what former Pearson director Rona Fairhead told the DCMS Select Committee (if you have Silverlight installed, you can have a look …

Applelutely fappulous: Fashionistas bow down before the JESUS PHONE

Fashionistas are a rare sight at tech events, where the level of stylishness on display tends to be more dowdy bore than haute couture. But that could be set to change following Apple's decision to welcome the fashion set into its fruity fold for the very first time. Cupertino has invited a number of trendy folk to a not-so- …
Jasper Hamill, 9 Sep 2014
TiVo Mega

Rack-mount 24TB RAID 5 disk array for $5,000. Let's just check the label here. Uh, it's TiVo

Pic TiVo has unveiled a massive new digital video recorder that costs $5,000 and can hold nearly three years of SD video, or 24 weeks of HD material. The TiVo Mega box is supposed to rid users of the pesky problem of ever actually running out of storage space by packing a 24TB RAID 5 system into a broadcast video recording box. …
Shaun Nichols, 9 Sep 2014

SHIP OF FAIL: How do we right capsized institutions we thought would NEVER go under?

Crawling from the Wreckage John Watkinson writes the first in a series of essays for El Reg in which he examines failures in society from banking and education to transport and IT. But why whine about this stuff so much, he ponders, when we can simply get on with the business of problem solving? The last seven or so years since the economic crash has not …

The Schmidt hits the clan: Google chief mauls publishers' 'abuse of dominance' claims

Google's exec chairman Eric Schmidt has hit back at publishers for complaining about the multinational's alleged dominance in the search market in Europe in a series of splashy newspaper ads today. He said in a blog post this morning that the "serious nature" of the claims - that Google favours its own search products, such as …
Kelly Fiveash, 6 Sep 2014
Nicole Kidman (Christine Lucas) in Before I Go To Sleep

Before I Go To Sleep turns out tense enough to keep you awake ...

Film Review The mark of a good thriller is usually that you don’t guess the who or the why or the what of it. Or, if you do manage to guess the who, why or what, at least you shouldn't be able to guess the how. But sadly, all that can be undone, if, after the big reveal, your first thought is: "But wait a minute, then why didn’t X and Y …
iPad iBooks app

Shareholders throw the book at Apple for ebook price-fix drama

Apple is once again being sued by its own investors – this time they're irked by the ebook price-fixing brouhaha. The lawsuit alleges the iThing maker part in the scandal harmed its reputation and thus shareholders' investments. According to a court filing obtained by journalist Jeff Roberts, Apple chief Tim Cook, executive Eddy …
Shaun Nichols, 6 Sep 2014

FCC boss Wheeler: Lack of broadband choice is screwing Americans

US Federal Communications Commission chairman Tom Wheeler has issued his most damning indictment of America's broadband infrastructure to date – claiming more than half of citizens have only one ISP in their area offering 25Mbps or faster connections, and that competition has been crippled by a telecoms duopoly. "The simple …
Iain Thomson, 4 Sep 2014
Ginger girls. Credit: Eddy Van 3000, Flickr

Speaking in Tech: Uber TRACKS me via GPS? Meh, it's just a taxi

Podcast speaking_in_tech Greg Knieriemen podcast enterprise It's another episode of El Reg's weekly tech podcast, stuffed with news and views on everything that's happened in our world this week. Join your hosts Greg Knieriemen, Ed Saipetch and Sarah Vela with special guest (and favourite ginger) Josh Atwell of SolidFire. This week …
Team Register, 4 Sep 2014
SOURCE:  http://www.sxc.hu/browse.phtml?f=view&id=1412135

Foxtel promises triple-play launch in early 2015

In a move designed to stave off the threat posed by operations like Netflix and FetchTV, Foxtel says its vaunted “triple-play” broadband-and-TV-and-phone service will land at the start of 2015. The Pay-TV outfit has also dropped its entry level package to $AU25 per month. The service was first announced in December 2013, on the …
Jade Goody and pals

The BNP can rip off your works for ‘parodies’ – but only if it's not racist

The Court of Justice of the European Union has ruled on who can use copyrighted work in a parody, and said it’s fair game – as long as it’s not, er, sexist or racist. Traditionally, authors have been able to use moral rights to disassociate their work from a derivative. But this latest interpretation of the EU’s parody exception …

Jimbo tells Wikipedians: You CAN'T vote to disable 'key software features'

Wikipedia’s maximum leader Jimbo Wales has declared a new era at the online encyclopaedia. Rather than the unpaid volunteer community voting on what software it uses, it will have to use what the wealthy WMF Foundation tells it to use. The community responded with what one veteran contributor described as an “unprecedented” …

CNN 'tech analyst' on NAKED CELEBS: WHO IS this mystery '4chan' PERSON?

Vid "If your password is password, change the 's' to a dollar sign." That's the advice from US news network CNN's "technology analyst" Brett Larson, who also thinks that 4chan is some sysadmin bloke who knew how to "hack things" so he could leak saucy, private photos of Jennifer Lawrence and other female celebrities. The confusion …
Kelly Fiveash, 3 Sep 2014

Twitter: La la la, we haven't heard of NUDE JLaw, Upton SELFIES

Twitter's top policy bod has refused to dismiss claims that people who tweet the leaked private photos of naked female celebrities are having their accounts suspended on the social meeja site. The company's Nu Wexler told The Register: We do not comment on individual accounts, for privacy and security reasons. Our rules …
Kelly Fiveash, 1 Sep 2014
Still from Miley Cyrus music video for Wrecking Ball

Facebook, Google and Instagram 'worse than drugs' says Miley Cyrus

Offensively-and-dangerously-in-control of her sexuality popette Miley Cyrus has declared that social media is worse than drugs. In an interview with Australian news magazine program Sunday Night ahead of a tour down under, Cyrus was asked whether her use of marijuana has deleterious effects on her health. Her response was to …

Facebook to let stalkers unearth buried posts with mobe search

Facebook is testing a search feature on its mobile application that will allow users to immerse themselves in forgotten old posts on the free content ad network. At present, the Menlo Park, California-based company is only experimenting with the tool on a small group of people who use Facebook, according to a Bloomberg report. …
Kelly Fiveash, 30 Aug 2014
Using a giant machine gun for propulsion

Love XKCD? Love science? You'll love a book about science from Randall Munroe

Page File They say you shouldn’t get a fan to review a book and it’s certainly tough to be critical when you pick up the new book from Randall Munroe, the much-loved creator of awesome science webcomic XKCD. What If? is a series of usually ridiculous questions from the public to XKCD’s inbox that Munroe answers using science and …

Are we there yet, are we there yet? Ballmer 'like a small child' upon buying basketball club

Microsoft mogul Steve Ballmer was as happy as a kid on Christmas morning getting a new toy, according to the woman who sold him a basketball team. Shelly Sterling, the former caretaker owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, said that Ballmer's enthusiasm to purchase the NBA club was "like a small child." Speaking in an interview …
Shaun Nichols, 30 Aug 2014
Regina Egbert, El Reg's virtual news anchor

Vulture News anchor Regina Eggbert is (sort of) LIVE from London

Vid Youtube Video Join us once again in the Vulture Central newsroom as anchorbeing Regina Eggbert presents the choicest morsels from the all-you-can-eat buffet that is this week's IT news. You can find all the stories from this week – from iAds to data security – here, here and here.® Regina Egbert, El Reg's virtual news anchor …
Peter Capaldi as Dr Who. Credit: BBC

Ofcom will not probe lesbian lizard snog in new Dr Who series

Ofcom has declined to probe the BBC after it received complaints about the screening of a kiss between a lizard-like character and her human wife during an episode of Doctor Who. The watchdog received half a dozen complaints after the characters, played by Neve McIntosh and Catrin Stewart, shared a crafty live-saving snog* as …
Jasper Hamill, 29 Aug 2014
Mozilla's 'Tiles' ad format

Mozilla's 'Tiles' ads debut in new Firefox nightlies

The Mozilla Foundation's controversial plan to bring ads into the Firefox browser has commenced, with new nightlies of the Firefox browser now including the Directory Tiles feature that users hated in its last implementation. Directory Tiles have now morphed into “Sponsored Tiles”, the distinction being that the former are …
Simon Sharwood, 29 Aug 2014
Money image

Comcast-Time Warner merger: CloudFlare's fare flare fair warning

Distributed web host CloudFlare says its costs rise dramatically in places where telcos have little to no competition. The company, which is hired by website owners to rapidly sling pages and other stuff at visitors, today published a report detailing its peering operations – and the deals it signs with internet connection …
Shaun Nichols, 26 Aug 2014
Star Trek Into Darkness

Next blockbuster you watch could be rendered on Google: Star Trek fx biz Zync gobbled

Google has confirmed its gobble of Zync, a cloud-based special effects rendering service. "Creating amazing special effects requires a skilled team of visual artists and designers, backed by a highly powerful infrastructure to render scenes. Many studios, however, don’t have the resources or desire to create an in-house …
Iain Thomson, 26 Aug 2014
Two teenage girls - one whispering in other's ear

6 Obvious Reasons Why Facebook Will Ban This Article (Thank God)

1. Facebook has declared war on "click-baiting headlines", slamming them as "spammy". 2. The social network has noticed that lazy, poorly written headlines that lure in readers with an ultimately unfilled promise are almost universally hated 3. BuzzFeed and Upworthy-style 'you won't believe this' garbage is drowning out …
Chris Williams, 25 Aug 2014
ISIS Islamists in Iraq

No, thank you. I will not code for the Caliphate

¡Bong! Late last year, in a dimly lit meeting room... Outside, the chant of the mob grew louder, and ever more terrifying. “Death to the Jews! Death to the Christians!” I gulped hard. My assistant มาลัย (which means "Garland of Flowers" in Thai) gripped the table. Through the open window I could smell burning paper, and possibly …
Steve Bong, 24 Aug 2014

Fast And Furious 6 cammer thrown in slammer for nearly three years

A man who illicitly recorded action film Fast And Furious 6, uploaded it to the internet and then sold copies online has been locked up for nearly three years. The jail term was handed down to Philip Danks, 25, of Livingstone Road, Bloxwich on Thursday, according to the Walsall Advertiser. A copy of the Universal Pictures' …
Kelly Fiveash, 23 Aug 2014
Amazon founder and CEO Jeff Bezos

Amazon to dig DEEPER into YOUR shopping habit BRAIN with targeted ads system

Amazon is reportedly expanding its own in-house ads system in a move for the online retail giant to compete with Google. According to the Wall Street Journal, which cites people familiar with the matter, the company is developing software that is eventually expected to unseat Google's ad placement platform on its own service. …
Kelly Fiveash, 23 Aug 2014

Jarvis versus Jarvis: Don't DISRUPT the DISRUPTION GURU!

Comment Thin-skinned media “guru” Professor Jeff Jarvis is furious about the acclaimed satirical Twitter account created by an English ex-pat techie in his name, which has built up a cult following. Jarvis claims his satirical alter-ego is damaging his reputation. The real Jarvis, author of the book What Would Google Do? describes …
Andrew Orlowski, 22 Aug 2014

Primetime precrime? Minority Report TV series 'being developed'

Steven Spielberg is reportedly working on a Minority Report TV series. The director of the 2002 sci-fi movie starring diminutive Hollywood actor Tom Cruise is understood to be developing the drama with Godzilla writer Max Borenstein, according to reports on The Wrap and Deadline. Amblin Television is said to be "in the very …
Team Register, 22 Aug 2014
BrickArms' Toy taliban figure

True fact: 1 in 4 Brits are now TERRORISTS

One in four Brits could be facing imminent arrest by the Metropolitan Police after apparently falling foul of the boys in blue's astonishing new definition of a terrorist. As we revealed earlier this week, simply viewing a beheading video is enough for the cops to label you a card-carrying threat to public safety. Now it turns …
Jasper Hamill, 22 Aug 2014

Football legend Gary Lineker in TWITTER POO TROLL SCANDAL

Gary Lineker is a celebrated footballer, telly host and crisp salesman. But it turns out that on the internet, what he's really remembered for is taking a big poo on the pitch during the 1990 Italia World Cup. But now the face of Walker's Crisps has had enough of internet trolls and has issued a broadside against the social …
Jasper Hamill, 22 Aug 2014
Netflix streaming service screenshot on Samsung

Netflix swallows yet another bitter pill, inks peering deal with TWC

Netflix has inked yet another peering deal with a major US telco, this time signing an interconnect agreement with Time Warner Cable. The streaming video giant confirmed that it had put in place faster direct connections between its own network and those of the US cable provider. Netflix issued a brief statement on the matter, …
Shaun Nichols, 20 Aug 2014
Galaxy Tab 4 Nook

Barnes & Noble: Swallow a Samsung Nook tablet, please ... pretty please

The lovechild of bookseller Barnes & Noble and electronics giant Samsung – the new Galaxy Tab 4 Nook tablet – is now on sale. The, surprise, surprise, Android-powered novelslab is a standard-issue 7in Galaxy Tab 4, running Barnes & Noble's e-reader software. The unit will be Wi-Fi only. The Sammy Nook, unveiled in June, is …
Shaun Nichols, 20 Aug 2014

I don't see dead people: Twitter to nix some images of deceased folk

Twitter users whose loved ones have recently died can now submit requests for the removal of distressing photos and videos of the deceased to the micro-blogging company. It comes after the late actor Robin Williams' daughter Zelda said she was ditching social media following a stream of abuse that she received about her father's …
Kelly Fiveash, 20 Aug 2014

Video of US journalist 'beheading' pulled from social media

Twitter and Facebook have taken steps to close down the accounts of militant Islamic State supporters after the publication of a video that appeared to show a man with a British accent "beheading" the American journalist James Foley. The video is thought to have first surfaced on an account called @mujahid4life which was …
Jasper Hamill, 20 Aug 2014

Kate Bush: Don't make me HAVE CONTACT with your iPHONE

Warbling '70s pop sensation Kate Bush has urged fans not to take photos and video footage during her upcoming London gigs, which will be the singer's first live tour in 35 years. The shows at the Hammersmith Apollo kick off next week, but Bush is already fretting about poorly captured images of her concert appearances being …
Kelly Fiveash, 20 Aug 2014
Video

US TV stations bowl sueball directly at FCC's spectrum mega-sale

US television broadcasters are suing the FCC over the regulator's planned auction of TV spectrum space to mobile phone networks. The National Association of Broadcasters (NAB) said it has objections to the framework the watchdog has laid out for an auction in which broadcasters sell off their spectrum space to carriers who will …
Shaun Nichols, 19 Aug 2014
Call of Duty: Ghosts

Call of Duty daddy considers launching own movie studio

Videogame kingpin Activision Blizzard is reportedly considering launching its own movie studio division to turn its games into films and TV shows. Milla Jovovich in Resident Evil This movie adaptation of Resident Evil was quite popular for some reason... Videogame adaptations have had mixed success to say the least, with some …
Kindergarten Cop

Caught red-handed: UK cops, PCSOs, specials behaving badly… on social media

In the past five years a surprisingly small number of police employees in England and Wales have been sacked, retired early or forced to resign in connection with serious cockups using social media. A silly season Freedom of Information trawl* of cop shops carried out by the Press Association and reported by the BBC found 828 …
Kelly Fiveash, 19 Aug 2014
Aphex Twin

Tor-rorists get sneaky Aphex Twin album peek in dance guru hypegasm

Richard James, aka electronic music composer Aphex Twin, has been using the power of Tor to hype his new album – and to remind computer users about their own system's security. http://syro2eznzea2xbpi.onion — Aphex Twin (@AphexTwin) August 18, 2014 The .onion link above leads to a web server hidden in the Tor anonymizing …
Iain Thomson, 18 Aug 2014

Class war! Wikipedia's workers revolt again

Wikipedia's workers are in uproar again, this time about the cash-rich Wikimedia Foundation giving itself "superpowers" to override community decisions. As a consequence of the ruckus, the head of engineering at the Foundation has had his community admin account suspended for a month on the German Wikipedia. It's another …
Andrew Orlowski, 18 Aug 2014