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Bootnotes

'4chan may be just a sysadmin who knows his way around', claims so-called expert

QoTW Plus: 'Know what hurts your brain? Googling yourself'

IT jargon is absolutely REAMED with sexual double-entendres

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Let’s bring it back to level pegging
Alistair Dabbs, 07 Sep 09:00

Jony Ive: Apple iWatch will SCREW UP Switzerland's economy

Comment Apple's chief designer forgot one crucial point about overpriced bling
Tim Worstall, 05 Sep 16:04

Data entry REAR-END SNAFU: Weighty ballsup leads to plane take-off flap

Another good reason not to treat kids as adults
Richard Chirgwin, 05 Sep 06:01

Apple Fanbois (and girls) already lining up for NEW iPHONE

You know, that one that hasn't even been announced yet?
Shaun Nichols, 04 Sep 01:17

MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS

'Prettier, better organised, more harmonious than if men were in charge'
Jasper Hamill, 28 Aug 06:02

Football legend Gary Lineker in TWITTER POO TROLL SCANDAL

Footballer targeted by puerile jokers
Jasper Hamill, 22 Aug 06:02

Get ready: The top-bracket young coders of the 2020s will be mostly GIRLS

Teen boys eclipsed in A* GCSE Computing rankings
Jasper Hamill, 21 Aug 15:27

Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD

'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Jasper Hamill, 19 Aug 06:01

Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?

Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...

Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!

Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Jasper Hamill, 18 Aug 06:05

Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people

They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Jasper Hamill, 15 Aug 06:02

Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'

Updated US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Simon Sharwood, 14 Aug 07:28
Neil and Anita's fried breakfast on Saturday

Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty

Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
Jasper Hamill, 12 Aug 06:04

eBay bans CD sales of metal band Burzum, citing offensive material

Meanwhile, sales of Mein Kampf going strong
Neil McAllister, 09 Aug 00:28

Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Examining the frothy disconnect in indie cafe culture
Alistair Dabbs, 08 Aug 12:25

Ex-Apple man Sam Sung - for it is he - sticks namebadge on eBay

Stump up via tat bazaar, do a good thing for ill kids
Jasper Hamill, 08 Aug 06:04

Check your Clungene, Irish women warned

Have a quick shufti, you may not be pregnant after all
Lester Haines, 07 Aug 14:25

Love in the time of the GPS sees chap propose with Google Map

'Writes' proposal using cycling app … and got a YES!
Simon Sharwood, 07 Aug 06:05

Help Australia's PM and attorney-general to define metadata

POLL Oz politicians want to collect it, but don't know what it is, so let's 'help' them out
Simon Sharwood, 06 Aug 23:02

Robot snaps on yellow RUBBER GLOVES, preps to invade Canada

It looks friendly, but wait until you get it in the back of a car
Jasper Hamill, 05 Aug 06:04

Plane grounded so cops can cuff semi-legless passenger

Alleged to have flung prosthetic leg, food at crew
Lester Haines, 01 Aug 13:35

'Guess what: If you use the internet, you’re the subject of experiments'

QuoTW Plus: MS 'unclear how citizens will benefit' from ODF

REGULAR FISTING is GOOD for your HEALTH, says respected surveyor

Wagwan, bruv, come bump the rock with me like Ali G, init
Jasper Hamill, 01 Aug 06:05

Nice computers don’t need to go to the toilet, says Barclays

Something for the Weekend, Sir?* Bad computers might ask if you are Sarah Connor
Alistair Dabbs, 31 Jul 11:01
Apes gather around a giant screw

Thirteen Astonishing True Facts You Never Knew About SCREWS

BuzzGasm! Threaderick the Great! And YES, we asked the Arapaho

Too rich for an iPhone 6? How about a gold-plated Brikk?

Not lobbed at your head, silly – a bling phone
Jasper Hamill, 30 Jul 06:02

Indian techies-in-training face down MAN-EATING LEOPARD - and WIN

Big cat causes big trouble at Mumbai college
Jasper Hamill, 29 Jul 06:05
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NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool

Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo

'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt

Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land

Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Lester Haines, 22 Jul 08:27