The Week in Summary

David and Goliath in the Valley of Elah

Pumping billions into data centres won't guarantee you an empire

It's not a surprise for us, in economics, to find that we've got two (or more) different processes going on, each working in opposite directions. The final result will come from the interaction of the two and we're never really sure which is going to win out.
Tim Worstall, 01 Apr 2015
Project Spartan in Wndows 10

We get our claws into Project Spartan, Microsoft's new browser

First Look Microsoft has released the first public preview build of Windows 10 to include Project Spartan, its new web browser.
Tim Anderson, 01 Apr 2015
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Newly merged Chinese taxi-hailing app now valued at $9 BEEELLION

A coalition of US hedge funds, sovereign wealth funds, and the largest of China's technology companies have invested in a merger of the country's largest taxi-hailing apps, bringing the combined company's valuation up to almost $9bn.

Boris Johnson backs trade union campaign to ungag civil servants

Boris Johnson and the FDA trade union are calling for the government to lift new restrictions on civil servants' contact with the media, which was quietly implemented following an update to the Civil Service Code slipped through earlier this month.
Costumed pirate
4

Fake Pirate Bay site pushes banking Trojan to WordPress users

Multiple WordPress sites are being redirected to a Pirate Bay copycat which in turn was being used to sling malware, anti-malware firm Malwarebytes warns.
John Leyden, 01 Apr 2015
Sydney harbour bridge poking out of the clouds
3

'Modernise' safe harbour laws for the tech oligarch era – IP czar

The Prime Minister’s outgoing IP advisor has said the shift in the balance of power to now-dominant tech multinationals means “Safe Harbour” provisions devised in the 1990s should be modernised and made fit for purpose.
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Apr 2015
Chef Logo 648p
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Chef Software cooks up new Chef Delivery DevOps product

ChefConf Chef Software has announced a new product for automating software deployment and the workflow of change management. Called Chef Delivery, it extends the company’s existing infrastructure automation product.
Tim Anderson, 01 Apr 2015
BB_PLAYBOOK_RIM_DOWN_TOILET
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Notebooks drag PC sales out the toilet, fondleslabs still falling

The PC market bounced back in the first quarter of 2015, mainly thanks to a big uplift in notebook sales.
Kat Hall, 01 Apr 2015

Locally Integrated Menus back on Vivid Vervet’s menu

Review Ubuntu 15.04, Vivid Vervet, just might be one of the biggest Ubuntu releases in several years. It might be more remarkable, though, for what you don’t see.
Bradley University offer to hackers
5

Hacked uni's admins hand ID theft prevention reward to data burglars

An Illinois university's sysadmins have seemingly handed data burglars a year-long subscription to LifeLock, an identity alert and credit monitoring system, following a data breach at the US institution which left thousands vulnerable to identity theft.
1

CSC confirms top exec suspended over Australian bank scandal

CSC has confirmed that one of its top brass – Eric Pulier – has been suspended, while it investigates allegations he gave kickbacks in the multi-million-dollar Commonwealth Bank of Australia IT contract fraud scandal.
Kat Hall, 01 Apr 2015
Register Roundtable at the Soho hotel
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Tech leaders: Is your biggest threat North Korea or your own board?

Reg Events If you're a tech boss looking to increase your profile, the one sure-fire way to make the headlines is to have a major security breach on your watch.
Joe Fay, 01 Apr 2015
Spying image
4

Mystery 'Explosive' cyber-spy campaign traced back to Lebanon

A nation-state cyber-attack campaign running since 2012 has been traced back to a somewhat unlikely launchpad in Lebanon.
John Leyden, 01 Apr 2015
China Dell fire - image courtesy HiPDA

Halifax's '24/7' online banking service is down YET AGAIN

Updated The Halifax's online banking systems, advertised as being available 24/7, 365 days a year, are down for the fourth time in four weeks.
2

Speaking in Tech: Cloud, Ellen Pao and ... er, Jeremy Clarkson

Podcast Podcast Hello, good morning, and welcome to another edition of Speaking in Tech, hosted by our old friends Greg Knieriemen and Ed Saipetch. Sarah Vela is out of the loop this week but will be back soon.
Team Register, 01 Apr 2015
SC4020
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Dell’s all-flash array receives benchmark boost

An all-flash Dell Storage Center array with six 480GB SSDs has the second-best price/performance score ever recorded in the SPC-1 benchmark.
Chris Mellor, 01 Apr 2015
Nuke blast

Nuclear waste spill: How becoming pro-organic caused a $240m blunder

Worstall on Wednesday There's a rather dry but absolutely fascinating document out from the US Department of Energy, which you can download in all its couple of hundred page glory here [PDF]. It's about the Waste Isolation Pilot Plant (WIPP) near Carlsbad in New Mexico.
Tim Worstall, 01 Apr 2015
Woman packs up contents of desk. Image via shutterstock
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IBM: No compulsory redundancies in Systems Middleware

IBM has confirmed that enough workers in the UK Systems Middleware division have volunteered to leave with a redundancy cheque, so compulsory lay-offs will not be required.
Paul Kunert, 01 Apr 2015
Downing Street road sign

So where's all these digital services GDS promised us?

The Government Digital Service has not been shy to boast about its perceived achievements, but in the space of its four year existence – and an increasing budget – its hard to point to any significant digital services that have yet emerged.
Kat Hall, 01 Apr 2015
Alation_data-graph

Metadata manipulation by Alation seeks needles in data haystack

A disparate bunch of Oracle, Apple and Microsoft guys have started up Alation, which makes metadata manipulations to present all of an enterprise's data to analysts and others so they can find stuff out.
Chris Mellor, 01 Apr 2015

The coming of DAB+: Stereo eluded the radio star

Breaking Fad Among my collection of radios, I have a couple of DAB sets, a 1940 Pilot Twin Miracle, a 1950s Ferguson that needs a bit of repair, and a rather long-in-the-tooth Marantz tuner as part of the living room hi-fi. It's a while since I powered up the Pilot, but it still more or less worked, which is not bad going for something that old. And, more to the point, there are still – for now at least – stations that can be picked up by those sets, three-quarters of a century after they were made. I suspect that the serviceable life of my old Acoustic Solutions DAB set will be a little shorter than that.
Nigel Whitfield, 01 Apr 2015
Watching You

Facebook 'violates Euro data law' say Belgian data cops' researchers

Facebook has reportedly been illegally tracking the web browsing habits of every visitor to its site, even if those visitors aren't account holders or have explicitly opted out of tracking when within the EU, according to a critical analysis by researchers at the University of Leuven and the Free University of Brussels.
Gobi_flash_flood

Samsung takes Google into third dimension of flashy storage

It's a 3D flash flood: Korean 3D flash-furtler Samsung has landed Google as a customer, according to the Korean Times.
Chris Mellor, 01 Apr 2015
Amazon data center
5

Amazon's clouds are da bomb, say EU data protection watchdogs

Amazon’s cloud services have been declared safe by Europe’s privacy rights watchdogs.
Jennifer Baker, 01 Apr 2015

UK's National Museum of Computing celebrates 10 glorious years

The National Museum of Computing (TNMoC), which yesterday celebrated its tenth anniversary as an independent organisation, will this coming weekend formally inaugurate a new membership club for enthusiasts of Britain’s computing heritage, and supporters of the museum.
Tony Smith, 01 Apr 2015
Rosetta's view of Earth on March 5th, 2005
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ESA reveals Rosetta's snaps of MARS and EARTH

The European Space Agency (ESA) has released a trove of images captured by the Rosetta probe during its journey to Comet 67P/ Churyumov-Gerasimenko.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015
Mushroom cloud explosion

It's the FALKLANDS SYNDROME! Fukushima MELTDOWN to cause '10,000 Chernobyls' in South Atlantic

Molten nuclear powerplant cores from Fukushima – having burned their way down through the planetary crust and plunged into the Earth's centre – are set to emerge again on the other side of the planet and devastate the Falkland Islands, scientists believe.
Team Register, 01 Apr 2015

Virgin Media goes TITSUP, RUINS Tuesday evening

Update UK internet service provider Virgin Media suffered a Total Inability To Support Usual Performance (TITSUP) event on Tuesday evening, leaving plenty of subscribers without broadband.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015
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Mozilla project spits out threat modelling tool for sysadmins

A trio of university undergraduates have worked with Mozilla to create an online threat modelling tool designed to help system administrators better understand the threats they face.
Darren Pauli, 01 Apr 2015
Clouds in blue sky

OpenDaylight and friends spin up 'CloudRouter Project'

Another day, another waft at the software-defined networking (SDN) and/or network function virtualisation (NFV) market, this time in the form of the new “CloudRouter Project” backed by CloudBees, Cloudius Systems, IIX, NGINX and OpenDaylight.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015
JVC HM-DH40000U D-VHS recorder

Netflix teams with AWS to launch VHS-as-a-service

Streaming video titan Netflix will shortly launch a variant of its service in which classic 1980s programs, and modern content, are streamed in a form that approximates the unbelievably bad video quality of the VHS video cassette.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015

Firefox hits prime time as version 37 manifests

Version 37 of Firefox is upon us, for ye olde PCs and Android.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015
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POODLE vuln dogs Australian consumer modems

The persistent awfulness of consumer broadband modems is once again in evidence, with the Poodle and Freak bugs present in a huge number of Australian households.

This one weird trick deletes any YouTube flick in just a few clicks

Security bod Kamil Hismatullin has disclosed a simple method to delete any video from YouTube.
Darren Pauli, 01 Apr 2015
The Ethernet Alliance's data centre roadmap
6

Ethernet Alliance plots 1.6 terabit-per-second future

Think 100 Gbps Ethernet is The Coming Thing? You ain't seen nothing yet: one of the venerable standard's custodians wants it going a hundred times faster by the end of another decade.
Cloud Hype Hoodie
1

AWS flops out massive D to vaporise big data rigs

Big data's a fine concept, but when it meets the real world of buying kit to run it on things can get nasty because the cost of the rigs required to crunch lots of data can be very considerable.
Simon Sharwood, 01 Apr 2015
A Guide to the Cockroaches of Australia
2

Harper review: break up ACCC, free up IP*, let freedom reign

Australia's federal government has conducted a review into competition policy and there's plenty in it to ponder for the country's tech sector.
cookies_eyes_privacy evercookies flash cookies

Verizon: FINE OK, you can now rid your life of our stalker supercookies

Verizon has finally got around to giving its subscribers the option to opt out of its controversial supercookie tracking program. Customers can find the switch in their My Verizon account settings, or by calling the toll-free number (866) 211-0874.
Shaun Nichols, 31 Mar 2015
Atmel SAM L21

Atmel stoops to an 'all-time low' in Internet of Things battle

Atmel reckons it has crafted the world's lowest-power ARM Cortex-M microcontrollers, a family of chips that can go for "decades" on the same batteries. The SAM-L21 family is aimed at "fire alarms, healthcare, medical, wearable, and devices placed in rural, agriculture, offshore and other remote areas."
Shaun Nichols, 31 Mar 2015
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Intel boosts low-end PCs, laptops with Atom-powered 'Braswell' SoCs

Without much fanfare, details have begun to emerge about Intel's latest line of Atom system-on-chips for low-end desktop PCs, and laptops.
Neil McAllister, 31 Mar 2015
Sign outside the National Security Agency HQ
6

US still hoarding zero-day app vulnerabilities, say EFF campaigners

The Electronic Frontiers Foundation reckons America's spooks aren't living up to the Obama administration's 2014 statement that it would disclose more vulnerabilities than it hoarded.

Telco and IT courses merged in TAFE tech teaching refresh

IT training courses offered in Australia's technical and further education (TAFE) colleges and by private training outfits have been given a major overhaul.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015
Suitcase bulging with cash
3

CSC tells execs to stay quiet on Australian bribery scandal

Senior executives at CSC have been told to say nothing substantive about the bribery scandal surrounding ServiceMesh, the source of CSC's “Agility” technology.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015

HP blasts $5.1bn sueball at ex-Autonomy execs, Lynch preps return fire

As it has long threatened to do, HP has sued two former Autonomy executives, accusing them of impropriety related to the two companies' financially disastrous 2011 merger.
Neil McAllister, 31 Mar 2015
Google Drive
8

Put those smartphones away: Google adds anti-copying measures to Drive for Work

Google has rolled out five new functions aimed at beefing up the security, administration and sharing features of its Drive for Work cloud business suite and the equivalent education package.
Iain Thomson, 31 Mar 2015
Picard Facepalm

Thanks for the data retention, tech sector

While Australians wring their hands over data retention, let's also remember the tech sector's abject failure to influence politics in the seven years the debate's been running here.
Pair of pliers with other tools
5

Microsoft to slash price of top-level MSDN subs for Visual Studio 2015

Microsoft is streamlining its service offerings for the forthcoming version of its Visual Studio IDE, cutting the prices of its high-end subscription levels in the process.
Neil McAllister, 31 Mar 2015

Bloke faces 25 years in the cooler for upsetting Thai king on Facebook

Setting a record for what may be the most unreasonable jail sentence ever handed down over a Facebook post, a Thailand citizen has started a 25-year stretch behind bars for five pictures deemed insulting to the country's monarchy.
Kieren McCarthy, 31 Mar 2015
Chromebook Flip

New dirt-cheap Chromebooks: Team Google keeps jackboot on throat of PC titans

While Google is trying to push Chromebooks upmarket with its flashy Pixel, its Chrome OS partners continue to target budget-conscious buyers with a new batch of devices priced at $250 and lower.
Neil McAllister, 31 Mar 2015

Silicon Valley gets its first 1Gbps home bro– oh, there's a big catch

Silicon Valley, or rather a small patch of it, finally has gigabit home broadband – and it's not Google Fiber. And there are two catches.
Shaun Nichols, 31 Mar 2015
Surface 3 in red

Microsoft dumps ARM for Atom with cut-price Surface 3 fondleslab

Pic + vid Microsoft's brief flirtation with ARM-powered Windows RT tablets looks to be over: the Redmond giant has unveiled its latest fondleslab, the Surface 3, which is a dinky Atom-powered slate running a full version of Windows on Intel hardware.
Iain Thomson, 31 Mar 2015
Mississippi River Lock and Dam number 7 with the I-90 Mississippi River bridge downstream. Image: Public Domain

GLOWING TAMPONS hold the key to ending pollution

A paper by a University of Sheffield research team, published Tuesday in the Water and Environmental Journal, has sought to answer one of the eternal questions facing humanity — how female hygiene products can be used to detect sewer misconnection discharge.
Rihanna in Battleship

Tidal music launch: Pop plutocrats pour FLAC on rival Spotify

Pop mega-stars including potty-mouthed rapper Jay-Z, professional non-smiler Kanye West and someone called Madonna have “launched” a music-streaming service owned by the artists.
Andrew Orlowski, 31 Mar 2015
USPTO_seal
2

SanDisk, Netlist heading to court in patent brouhaha that won't end

After its ULLtraDIMM OEM supplier Diablo Technologies walked out of the jury trial against Netlist with a big "not guilty" stamped on its brow recently, it's now SanDisk's turn to fight a little Netlist court action.
Chris Mellor, 31 Mar 2015
Brian_Pawlowski_at_Pure_Storage
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Chief architect Beepy ready to take Pure’s flash somewhere new

Pure Storage is putting ex-NetApp FlashRay engineering head Brian Pawlowski into a chief architect role.
Chris Mellor, 31 Mar 2015
Taxi Driver

UberPop granted temporary reprieve in France

A French Court has declined to ban Uber's controversial UberPop app, bouncing the decision to the country's highest appeals court.
Kat Hall, 31 Mar 2015
Roy Lichtenstein Wham! Bang!
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Kaminario playing 3D flash chippery doo-dah with its arrays

Interview Twitter can be great. There we were, we storage twits, talking about 3D flash, when Kaminario CTO Shachar Fienblit got in touch to say Kaminario was using 3D flash already.
Chris Mellor, 31 Mar 2015
Huawei HQ
2

Huawei bellows big revenue jump thanks to brisk 2014 phone sales

Huawei – which was backed by Britain last week despite repeated claims that the Chinese company's network kit could endanger national security – saw a 33 per cent leap in net profit for 2014.
Kelly Fiveash, 31 Mar 2015

Ding Dong, ALIENS CALLING

Sorry, sci-fi fans: pretty much anyone who's imagined what a near-light-speed spacecraft would look like has got it wrong, because they've forgotten its interaction with photons.

Microsoft update mayhem delays German basketball game, costs team dear

What’s the worst thing that could happen when your Windows update takes longer than expected? Ask the Paderborn Finke Baskets, a German pro basketball team who got relegated thanks to Windows’ sluggish performance.
Jennifer Baker, 31 Mar 2015
David Donatelli
1

Oracle boat picks up ex-HP hardware man Donatelli

HP exec David Donatelli has followed Mark Hurd to Oracle, and taken up an exec veep position related to hardware, according to Business Insider, citing numerous sources.
Chris Mellor, 31 Mar 2015
Snakes on a Plane, kind of

Snakes on a backplane: Server-room cabling horrors

Twisted Pair – Part 2 The internet is not something you can just dump something on. It’s not a big truck. Nor is it a series of tubes. It’s an unimaginably large collection of computers connected by cables and radio waves.
Josh Folland, 31 Mar 2015
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El Reg lays claws on RockBLOCK Mk2 Iridium sat comms unit

Heads up Our chums at Rock Seven – supplier of Iridium satellite comms units to our audacious spaceplane ballocket mission – have announced the release of the RockBLOCK Mk2.
Lester Haines, 31 Mar 2015

EU digi-chief clashes with robo-veep over geo-blocking

Gaffe-prone Commissioner Günther H-dot Oettinger is at it again. In statements to the German press (he rarely talks to anyone else), Oetti directly mocked his boss Andrus Ansip’s desire to end geo-blocking.
Jennifer Baker, 31 Mar 2015
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Life after Lord Shugs looks good, as Viglen directors' packages swell

Being a director at Viglen has become considerably more lucrative since Lord Shugs offloaded the tech supplier to Westcoast Holdings.
Paul Kunert, 31 Mar 2015

Think server vulns are the IT department's problem? Think again

Regardless of the type or size of business you're part of, the way we approach security has changed forever.
Theresa Miller, 31 Mar 2015

Encryption is the REAL threat – Head Europlod

Europe’s top cop has taken to the BBC to once again slam encryption as the biggest threat to counter-terrorism and law enforcement.
Jennifer Baker, 31 Mar 2015
hands waving dollar bills in the air
4

Managed services biz Claranet adds £107m to war chest

Acquisition-hungry European managed services provider Claranet has drummed up £107m in a refinancing deal.
Kat Hall, 31 Mar 2015

Big Blue to give car insurers IoT peeking powers

IBM has announced it will spend US$3 billion over four years on a new internet of things business unit.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015
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Wearables market action is all in the wrist says market-scryer IDC

The wearables market will be dominated by wrist action, according to market-watcher IDC, and will remain smaller than the PC market.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015
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Ebay snuffs malware upload bug

Hacker Aditya Sood has disclosed two vulnerabilities in eBay that allow hackers to upload files for drive-by-download attacks.
Darren Pauli, 31 Mar 2015
USA, Canada - which one is which?

Secret Bezos delivery helicopters operate from mystery Canadian base to evade US regulators

Amazon's relationship with Uncle Sam's Federal Aviation Authority has apparently deteriorated so much that the web-based retailer has fled its jurisdiction for the more liberal regulatory regime of Transport Canada.
Periscope and Meerkat by Flickr user Anthony Quintano https://www.flickr.com/photos/quintanomedia/
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Periscope smeared by streaming security SNAFU

Twitter's Meerkat-strangling live streaming app Periscope has had its first privacy SNAFU, leaking the titles (but not the content) of videos meant for private circulation only.
Rubbish bin

Pre-Snowden NSA grunts wanted to nix phone spying: report

Even before Edward Snowden spilled the beans on the National Security Agency's(NSA's) extensive surveillance programs, high-level US bureaucrats were considering spiking the program.
Darren Pauli, 31 Mar 2015
Sydney harbour bridge poking out of the clouds
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SoftLayer and Telstra in cloudy embrace

Australia's dominant telco Telstra, which also operates an AU$2bn a year IT services arn, has struck a deal to resell IBM's SoftLayer cloud down under and is chatting about taking the arrangement global.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015
Ganesha street art by Flickr user avlxyz https://www.flickr.com/photos/avlxyz/

Prostrate yourself before the GNU, commands Indian DEITY

The best-acronymed government department in the world – India's Department of Electronics and Information Technology (DEITY) – has laid out a new policy (PDF) commanding the nation's government to use only open source software.
Simon Sharwood, 31 Mar 2015
Inside the Google Lab where surgeons prepare the human/dog experiment

Google plans ROBOTS to SLICE YOU OPEN AND CUT YOU UP

Google has signed a deal to collaborate with Johnson & Johnson subsidiary Ethicon to work on surgical robotics applications.
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How much did T-Mobile US make from that failed AT&T buyout? How about $7.7bn

A failed 2011 merger with AT&T is paying off in a big way for T-Mobile US.
Shaun Nichols, 31 Mar 2015

AMD opens kimono on chip futures a little more

The best way to protect corporate secrets is to announce them at a tech conference in Japan, which is why word is only just arriving of AMD's February reveal of a clustering roadmap.
A hammer and bent screw
9

Cisco wipes its memory from susceptible-to-Row Hammer list

Cisco has worked through data centre and switch products that may have been vulnerable to the Row Hammer vulnerability, and decided there's nothing with the bridge brand on the front that's subject to the bug.
China censorship

Day FOUR of the GitHub web assault: Activists point fingers at 'China's global censorship'

With the GitHub distributed denial-of-service (DDoS) attack nearing its fifth day of bombardment, the code-sharing upstart said it is holding up well under fire.
Shaun Nichols, 31 Mar 2015

Anti-gay Indiana starts backtracking on hated law after tech pressure

The governor of Indiana is quietly backtracking on a law that threatens to legalize discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people – after growing pressure from tech companies.
Kieren McCarthy, 30 Mar 2015
Spotify
6

Sony snags Spotify for streaming music to Playstation gamers

On Sunday, as promised, Sony killed off its Music Unlimited song streaming service and now the replacement is in place: Spotify is slinging music to PlayStation users from the cloud.
Iain Thomson, 30 Mar 2015
Project Spartan screenshot

Microsoft's Project Spartan browser is HERE (unless you build apps or run VMs, that is)

Microsoft has shipped a new build of Windows 10 that offers a first look at its much-hyped Project Spartan web browser, but the software giant has cautioned that developers may want to hold off upgrading.
Neil McAllister, 30 Mar 2015

Feds cuffed for allegedly PILFERING Silk Road drug souk's Bitcoins

The US Department of Justice has accused two federal agents of stealing more than a million dollars in Bitcoins during the Silk Road investigation.
Shaun Nichols, 30 Mar 2015
Screenshot of the Office 2013 installer for Office 365
1

Office 365 and Dynamics go live in Australia

Office 365 files may load just a little faster in Australia today, after Microsoft announced it has flicked the switch for the local version of the service.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015

Motorola Mobility loses another patent suit to über-troll Intellectual Ventures

Motorola Mobility has suffered another defeat at the hands of patent hoarder Intellectual Ventures, with a Delaware jury finding that Moto infringed a patent describing a way for handheld devices to connect to docking stations.
Neil McAllister, 30 Mar 2015

Why Feed.Me.Pizza will never exist: Inside the world of government vetoes and the internet

The world's governments are revealing their egos and priorities by vetoing short domain names.
Kieren McCarthy, 30 Mar 2015
Sony Xperia Go rugged Android smartphone

Google cloud addicts: Now you can juggle your web apps from your Android smartie

Google developers looking to keep an eye on their cloud processes now have an app for Android, dubbed Cloud Console, that will allow remote monitoring of the Chocolate Factory's Cloud Platform.
Iain Thomson, 30 Mar 2015
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Microsoft: Office 365 IT admins get free device-wrangling controls

Microsoft has begun bundling basic mobile device management (MDM) capabilities with all commercial Office 365 subscriptions, as it said it would at last year's TechEd Europe conference.
Neil McAllister, 30 Mar 2015

NASA to take MARTIAN FLYING SAUCER for a spin

Vid NASA is promising a bit of live Martian flying-saucer action on Tuesday with a "spin-table" test of its Low-Density Supersonic Decelerator (LDSD) – the future Mars payload delivery tech which may one day combine airbags and parachutes to safely place kit on the Red Planet's surface.
Lester Haines, 30 Mar 2015
NSA's Fort Meade headquarters

Cross-dressing blokes storm NSA HQ: One shot dead, one hurt

One man is dead and another seriously hurt after they tried ramming a car into the gates of the NSA's headquarters in Fort Meade, Maryland.
Iain Thomson, 30 Mar 2015
pipes

The internet IS a series of tubes. Kinda: A Reg 101 guide to cabling

Twisted Pair – Part 1 There are so many types of cables and connectors it can be confusing when you are building a data centre. I’ve taken a look at the pros and cons of each so you can decide which is the best option for you.

Node4 buys app developer and cloud purveyor Reconnix

Lloyds Development Capital-backed Node4 has snapped up non-proprietary application development and professional services outfit Reconnix.
Paul Kunert, 30 Mar 2015

Pure CEO dons cheerleader outfit, harangues world, dog

Comment Pure’s chief evangelist officer executive officer, Scott Dietzen, has blown Pure’s trumpet about its 2014 business.
Chris Mellor, 30 Mar 2015
Vodafone adds payment cards to mobile wallet

Vodafone wants to bonk you… wait, wants you to bonk

NFC payment tech for phones, aka bonking, is coming to an Android Vodamobe near you.
Simon Rockman, 30 Mar 2015
Facebook data center - interior, lit up
6

One day all this could be yours: Be Facebook, without being Facebook

Data centre design is a costly business, costing Apple $1.2bn for a pair of “next-generation” carbon-neutral plants in Ireland and Denmark. Even the smallest average Joe data centre will easily cost north of $1m once the options such as multihomed networks, HVAC systems and other such critical kit is installed with redundancy, security and a thousand other things that only data centre designers think about ahead of time.
Stuart Burns, 30 Mar 2015
Cat yawning

Virgin Media takes its time on website crypto upgrade

Virgin Media has failed to upgrade weak encryption software that it uses for sensitive parts of the telco's website, despite complaints from customers who claim to have repeatedly flagged up security concerns to the firm.
Kelly Fiveash, 30 Mar 2015
NBN Co by Dushan Hanuska https://www.flickr.com/photos/hanuska/
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NBN Co launches fibre-to-the-building product

+Comment NBN Co, the entity charged with building Australia's National Broadband Network, says it has launched its fibre-to-the-building (FTTB) product.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015

Phoenix IT Group: we hired 20 bods for config/ distie centre

What Phoenix IT Group giveth with one hand it taketh with another: the services group is hiring 20 bods to man a new config centre, the same number it is waving goodbye to this month in the repairs biz.
Paul Kunert, 30 Mar 2015
big droplets falling from rain cloud
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Outsourcery still losing as much as it turns over

Former Dragons' Den rude boy and Outsourcery co-founder Piers Linney is likely to be forced to pitch his business to investors again for a fresh round of funding, after closing off a tough, cash-zapping year.
Paul Kunert, 30 Mar 2015
All UK police forces use Tetra

Police ICT Company finally lurches off the ground

After a four-year gestation period, the body intended to help UK coppers better splash their £1bn a year in tech spend – the Police ICT Company – has finally got off the ground.
Kat Hall, 30 Mar 2015
The Tanami Desert en route to Willowara
5

Going strictly hands-off: Managing your data centre from afar

If your core servers – and hence your core applications – live in a data centre, then by definition they're not on your premises.
Dave Cartwright, 30 Mar 2015
Cell tower, view from below. Image by Shutterstock.com

Ofcom's to-do list: Number porting, sell spectrum, buy milk

Ofcom has set out its objectives for 2015/16, and they're broadly as outlined in the draft report.
Simon Rockman, 30 Mar 2015
ice hockey puck

Don't listen to me, I don't know what I'm talking about – a pundit speaks

Storagebod A day rarely goes by without someone declaring one technology or another is dead and rarely a year goes by without someone declaring this to be the year of whatever product they happen to be pimping, or be in favour of.
StorageBod, 30 Mar 2015

Just WALK IN and buy an Apple Watch. Are you mad?

Apple has slapped some restrictions on early-bird madcap punters who want to part with hard-earned cash for a fancy wrist-job – they must shop only on white unicorns, bring virgin £50 notes and rap their order.
Paul Kunert, 30 Mar 2015
Twilight Zone, 'Time Enough At Last'

Belgium to the rescue as UK consumers freeze after BST blunder

British consumers awoke to cold houses this morning as Nest “Learning” Thermostats failed to accommodate the switch to British Summer Time.
David Cameron, Prime Minister, meets Ren Zhengfei, founder and CEO of Huawei Technologies, in Downing Street, 11th September, 2012.

Huawei networking kit gets the green light from Blighty's spooks

A board put together to double-check the work of a British government team set up to investigate Huawei has given the Chinese giant a clean bill of health.
Simon Rockman, 30 Mar 2015
Apple MacBook Air 13-inch, early 2015

Apple's 13-incher will STILL cost you a bomb: MacBook Air 2015

Review Well, it looks as though the writing is on the wall for the MacBook Air. It’s still one of the slimmest and lightest laptops around, with impressive 10-12 hour battery life. But that 1440x900 resolution is dead in the water these days – especially at Apple price levels – while the chunky metal bezel around the screen is the tech equivalent of those huge shoulderpads that Dame Joan Collins used to wear on Dynasty back in the 1980s.
Stephen Dean, 30 Mar 2015
Smart Meter keeps you on top of your spending

Smart meters are a ‘costly mistake’ that'll add BILLIONS to bills

A report from the Institute of Directors (IoD) warns that the government's rollout of smart meters “should be 'halted, altered or scrapped' to avoid a potentially catastrophic government IT disaster.”
David Cameron

David Cameron's Passport number emailed to footy-head

Last week, Australia passed mandatory metadata retention laws, over objections that personal data should only be accessible by a very small number of people under very secure circumstances because it is is bound to leak and cause embarrassment.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015
Galaxy S6 Edge Smart Manager

Galaxy S6 and S6 Edge in Vulture's claws: we find looks AND brains

FIRST LOOK Samsung's gone for beauty and brains with its new Galaxy S6 and S6 Edge, but hasn't fallen into the trap of style over substance.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015

Insight's EMEA prez: It's not our fault cloud sales are slow, blame the NSA

Services investments made by box-peddling shape shifter Insight Enterprises will start to pay dividends in Europe from next year, regional head honcho Wolgang Eberman has predicted.
Paul Kunert, 30 Mar 2015
5

Unlimited stolen Uber accounts flogged for $5

Fraudsters are flogging an 'unlimited' number of stolen Uber accounts containing personal details and limited credit card data for less than $5.
Darren Pauli, 30 Mar 2015

UN inflicts 10,000 flat pack IKEA shelters on Iraq - WITHOUT TOOLS

The United Nations Refugee Agency (UNHCR) has placed an order for 10,000 flat-pack IKEA refugee shelters.

EMC and Cloudera withdraw from Indiana big data event

The technology industry's objections to the US State of Indiana's new Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which permits businesses to decline to serve people on the basis of sexuality or other traits, have deepened after EMC and Cloudera cancelled their presence at a forthcoming conference.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015

Jailed Brit con phishes prison, gets bail

A convicted British fraudster used a fake website and fake identities to trick prison officers into releasing him.
Darren Pauli, 30 Mar 2015
ATLAS (A Toroidal LHC Apparatus) is one of six detector experiments at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) – image by Maximilien Brice CERN/Science photo library

Short circuit at Large Hadron Collider slows return to matter-mauling

The eager Igors of CERN are going to have to wait a little longer before they try to destroy the universe: it turns out that the upgraded Large Hadron Collider (LHC) has a short circuit in one of its dipole circuits.
MIT's entanglement machine

Atomic clocks' ticks tamed by 3,000 entangled atoms

MIT and University of Belgrade boffins have taken a big step in applying the quantum property of entanglement to macro systems: they're claiming to have roped together more than 2,900 rubidium atoms with a single photon.
Hitler as Fanboi

Apple is like HITLER says Chinese billionaire

One of the ways Chinese kids like to pass their time is watching video on a site called Leshi TV that's sufficiently popular the company's CEO Jia Yueting is ranked among the planet's billionaires.
Simon Sharwood, 30 Mar 2015
Clouds in blue sky

Accedian goes hybrid NFV in carrier QoS product

Rather than pull out all the stops on network function virtualisation (NFV), telcos would like to stage their implementations one piece at a time, according to Canadian vendor Accedian Networks.
Opportunity in clean room

Opportunity suffers another flash-memory 'amnesia' moment

A flash memory reformat left NASA's Mars rover Opportunity with a brief episode of what the agency calls “amnesia” – thankfully, without any loss of scientific data.
NASA 'Blue Marble' image of Earth taken on December 7, 1972, by the crew of the Apollo 17 spacecraft
2

AWS flicks switch for cloud storage replication

Amazon Web Services (AWS) has done something rather useful to its simple storage service (S3), namely making it possible to replicate data across regions.
Simon Sharwood, 29 Mar 2015
Pebble Time

Affirmative wrist action: Pebble Time raises 20 MEELLION BUCKS on Kickstarter

Startup Pebble Time – which, we're told, plans to start shipping its wrist-puter in May – raised more than $20m during a month-long Kickstarter campaign.
Kelly Fiveash, 29 Mar 2015

Frayed British Airways plays down mega hack attack on frequent flyer accounts

Wrongdoers have hacked into tens of thousands of British Airways' frequent flyer accounts, however the travel giant claimed on Sunday that no personal information had been swiped.
Kelly Fiveash, 29 Mar 2015
Yawunik kootenayi walkcycle – artist's impression. Credit: Lars Field/Phlesch Bubble

Dino-boffins discover ancient, TOOTHY-CLAWED, four-eyed MONSTER LOBSTER

Scientists have revealed a terrifying-sounding new species of lobster-like marine creature that pre-dates the first living dinosaur by 250 million years.
Kelly Fiveash, 29 Mar 2015
5

Yahoo! and! Microsoft! extend! tricky! search! deal! talks! by! 30! days!

Microsoft and Yahoo! have extended discussions about whether to remain wedded to a decade-long and at times stormy search deal that was first struck in 2009.
Kelly Fiveash, 29 Mar 2015
Still from the movie Zoolander: Derek and a fellow model try to get the 'files' out of the Mac by smashing it to pieces. copyright Paramount Pictures

'If people can encrypt their cell phones, what's stopping them encrypting their PCs?'

QuoTW This week NASA showed off its plans to lasso an asteroid, researchers mourned over a bug-riddled Chrome browser, and RSA banned buxom booth babes.
Shaun Nichols, 29 Mar 2015
Pac-Man Google game (taken from Google home page on anniversary of Pac-Man )

Google whacks CREEPY predictive search up to 11 in cheap Chrome OS beta

Google's Chromebooks are about to undergo an overhaul that puts the Chocolate Factory's creepy, predictive search tech – Google Now – at the heart of the firm's OS.
Kelly Fiveash, 29 Mar 2015
Robot Overlords

Robot Overlords: Tween babysitting fodder with no in-jokes for the adults

Film Review Robot Overlords is an old-school kids’ movie, with none of the surreptitious nods to the dragged along adult audiences that we’ve become accustomed to, just friendly, under-13s fun.
NHM Coral Reef Aquarium
7

Coral Reefs: Secret Cities of the Sea exhibition – life beneath the waves

Review There's an undeniable fascination to coral reefs and the creatures that inhabit them, whether it's tales of shipwreck on tropical islands surrounded by a lagoon, romantic snorkelling adventures, or captivating documentaries about the Great Barrier Reef.
Nigel Whitfield, 29 Mar 2015
honda crv hero shot

Honda CR-V: SUV-lite that’s also light on the pocket

Vulture at the Wheel This wasn't the car I was expecting. If I’d been paying attention I would have known that the new twin-turbo, 9-speed auto, 4WD 1.6L diesel turbo CR-V isn’t on the UK press fleet yet. What rolled up outside Vulture Central was the decidedly white-bread 2WD i-DTEC single-turbo 1.6L diesel.
Alun Taylor, 29 Mar 2015
Worstall Merkur 5 650p

Building a better society from the Czechs' version of Meccano

Worstall @ the Weekend To move a little off the normal sort of subject around here, something from an exhibition just around the corner here in Usti nad Labem in the Czech Republic. The lads I hang out with here are 40ish professionals and they were terribly excited about an exhibition being put on of “Merkur”.
Tim Worstall, 29 Mar 2015
Elop and Nadella, photo: Microsoft

Microsoft's Windows 10 build list snowballs for Lumia mobes

Microsoft has tentatively opened up its Windows 10 Technical Preview to more phones, after its initial list back in February had been extremely limited.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Mar 2015

Easy come, easy go: Euro astroboffins blast brace of Galileo sats INTO SPAAACE

The European Space Agency has successfully launched two new satellites into orbit as part of the Galileo project to offer EU citizens an alternative GPS system from late 2016.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Mar 2015
5

$23m to a WordPress biz? Why top-end hosting is big money

Analysis Website hosting may not be the first thing you consider when looking at tech industry growth, but venture capitalists North Bridge are betting different.
Kieren McCarthy, 28 Mar 2015
The Chocolate Festival, London

Exercising with chocolate: Festival and tours galore

Chocolate and exercise together, whatever next? Well, for the chocoholics and general lovers of cacao based products, there are various chocolate tours springing up at various locations around the country including Edinburgh, Oxford and one taking place in London this weekend.
Simon Crisp, 28 Mar 2015

Apple's Tim Cook and Salesforce's Marc Benioff DECLARE WAR on anti-gay Indiana

Analysis Two high-profile tech CEOs – Apple's Tim Cook and Salesforce's Mark Benioff – have publicly criticized a new Indiana law that legalizes discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people.
Kieren McCarthy, 28 Mar 2015
Liz, Pistols Girl, 1978 Copyright Phil Strongman
5

Street Culture: Reg man's snazzy snaps of punky London go on display

For the next four days a London exhibition features the youth cult photos of Register contributor Phil Strongman. Here he explains the whys and wherefores – and how technology has changed such shows.
Phil Strongman, 28 Mar 2015
Ferdinand Mount, The Tears of the Rajas book cover
2

Blood Relatives, The Tears of the Rajas and The Fifth Gospel

Page File El Reg bookworm Mark Diston looks at literature's latest with a compelling debut novel from Stevan Alcock. The days of empire in India get up close and personal due in no small part to Ferdinand Mount's well-documented family history. And for those with a taste for antiquity, Ian Caldwell's latest gives Dan Brown a run for his money.
Mark Diston, 28 Mar 2015

Dot-sucks sucks, say lawyers: ICANN urged to kill 'shakedown' now

The intellectual property constituency (IPC) of domain overseer ICANN has formally asked the organization to halt the rollout of the controversial .sucks top-level domain, due to start on Monday.
Kieren McCarthy, 28 Mar 2015
Jeremy Clarkson

Forum chat is like Clarkson punching you repeatedly in the face

Something for the Weekend, Sir? How can you condone racist violence, Alistair?
Alistair Dabbs, 28 Mar 2015
Soyuz

To BALDLY GO where few have gone before: NASA 'naut twin to spend YEAR IN SPAACE

Pic + vid Three 'nauts are on their way to the International Space Station – and two of them are going to remain onboard the orbiting lab for a full year
Iain Thomson, 28 Mar 2015
Bates Motel

Hotel Wi-Fi not only hideously expensive – it's horribly insecure

Travelers are used to getting screwed over by hotel internet access.
Iain Thomson, 27 Mar 2015
Paul Winchell and dummy

Chip rumor-gasm: Intel to buy Altera! Samsung to buy AMD! ... or not

Rumors flew fast and furious on Friday about possible acquisitions in the chip industry, with both Intel and Samsung said to be eyeing purchases that could strengthen their positions against rivals.
Neil McAllister, 27 Mar 2015

FCC supremo slams big cable in gridiron Robin Hood metaphor mash-up

Net neutrality Tom Wheeler, the chairman of US broadband regulator the FCC, fresh from no fewer than four Congressional grillings, has given a spirited defense of his radical net neutrality rules.
Kieren McCarthy, 27 Mar 2015
Slack

Flak for Slack chaps in yak app hack flap: User database whacked

Workplace chat app Slack, popular among West Coast startup hipsters and others, has been hacked, its makers said on Friday.
Shaun Nichols, 27 Mar 2015

Appeal court bombshell: Google must face British justice for 'Safari spying'

Apple Safari-using Brits, who claim they were tracked by Google's adbots without permission, can sue Google in the UK, the Court of Appeal of England and Wales has ruled.
Iain Thomson, 27 Mar 2015
Confused computer keyboard
9

Did we just wake up in an alternate universe? BlackBerry turns a profit

BlackBerry actually made money in the fourth quarter of its fiscal 2015, but the bigger picture for the ailing smartphone maker is far from rosy.
Neil McAllister, 27 Mar 2015
Ice maiden. Pic: Futurilla, Flickr

In-depth: Supermicro's youngest Twin is a real silent ice maiden

Sysadmin blog Supermicro has released the first of its new line of Twin series unblade* servers and El Reg has taken the opportunity to given them a right good kicking.
Trevor Pott, 27 Mar 2015
Great Wall of China

GitHub jammed by injected JavaScript, servers whacked by DDoS

GitHub's servers are being hammered by web traffic from an army of unwitting cyber-foot-soldiers.
Shaun Nichols, 27 Mar 2015
Octopus_Red_Hat

Red Hat explains its choice of scale-out storage hats

Which Red Hat scale-out storage product should you choose: Ceph or Gluster?
Chris Mellor, 27 Mar 2015
Person throwing rock at tank
2

Big Data will shield the Apple Watch from Android onslaught

It's possible that the arrival of a firm like Apple into wearables with its watch validates the space, just as Apple validated smart phones eight years ago.
Tim Worstall, 27 Mar 2015
Flood
7

All the flash world needs is more TLC, suggests report

Triple-level cell (TLC) flash is heading towards being nearly half of all flash shipments.
Chris Mellor, 27 Mar 2015
2

VMware channel confirms price hikes from next month

The meteoric rise of the US dollar relative to currencies in Europe and other parts of the globe is the reason VMware is reducing channel discounts by mid-to-high single digits and why user pricing will rise.
Paul Kunert, 27 Mar 2015

BOFH: Never mind that old brick, look at this ink-stained BEAUTY

Episode 4 Episode 4 *Crash!* "Oh, I'm terribly sorry, I appear to have accidentally nudged it off the table" I say, as tears well up in the owner's eyes.
Simon Travaglia, 27 Mar 2015

Europe could be drowned in 'worthless pop culture' thanks to EU copyright plans

Comment Expect more bland Europop and formulaic Hollywood blockbusters in your future if a proposal by European Commissioner Andrus Ansip are implemented, cultural industries in smaller European states say.
Andrew Orlowski, 27 Mar 2015
Three  UK Passports

Home Office awards Raytheon £150m over e-borders cancellation

The Home Office has agreed to hand over £150m to defence company Raytheon over the dispute relating to the cancellation of the £750m e-Borders contract.
Kat Hall, 27 Mar 2015
IMTF_3D_NAND_die

Everyone's getting flashy: Intel and Micron want to feed you their wafers

Four months after revealing their 3D NAND flash tech, Intel and Micron say they are now sampling product - the day after beleaguered SanDisk announced its 48-layer tech would enter pilot production in the second half of the year.
Chris Mellor, 27 Mar 2015

Euro THERMONUCLEAR REACTOR PROJECT is in TROUBLE

The International Thermonuclear Experimental Reactor project is in hot water with the European Parliament for failing to manage EU funds properly.
Jennifer Baker, 27 Mar 2015

El Reg uncages its truly demonic BOFH t-shirt

You spoke, we listened, and as of right now, you can get your mitts on a classic BOFH t-shirt down at El Reg's merchandising tentacle Cash'n'Carrion.
Team Register, 27 Mar 2015
Jeroen Hoencamp is the boss of Vodafone UK

Voda UK CEO says one thing about not-spots, Minister of Fun says another

Don’t hold your breath for better mobile phone coverage. While Vodafone UK CEO Jeroen Hoencamp is hopeful that the government will do its bit as part of the not-spots agreement, Minister of Fun Ed Vaziey claims he’s already done it.
Simon Rockman, 27 Mar 2015
John Lewis, inside Magna Park
4

John Lewis stakes £100,000 on building a working tech creche

John Lewis has launched a £100,000 technology incubator competition to encourage tech start-ups to get involved with its business.
Gavin Clarke, 27 Mar 2015
Google logo
6

Google dangles $70m before new CFO to lure her from Wall Street

It took a $70m golden hello to entice Ruth Porat – Google's new chief financial officer – away from her role at Morgan Stanley.

ZTE's stealthy Nubia: China-made Google-free Android mobe

Hands On A stealth project being shown discreetly at Mobile World Congress this month shows how far Chinese phone manufacturers have come – and how far they have to go. It’s under the umbrella of ZTE, the state-owned telecoms giant, and was officially unveiled this week.
Andrew Orlowski, 27 Mar 2015
Tim Cook as Mr T

Tim Cook: I'll give just a THIRD of what Gates gave to charity last year

Apple CEO Tim Cook has confirmed he is to hand over his relatively measly fortune to charity for the betterment of the planet – once he’s paid off his nephew’s college bill.
Paul Kunert, 27 Mar 2015
2

The hyper-collapsed data centre: Vapor IO's all-in-one info chamber

Hyper-modular data centre Vapor IO exited stealth mode recently to publicly push its vision for the hyper-collapsed data centre.
HTC One M9 Android smartphone

HTC One M9 Android smartphone: Like a M8 with a squinty eye

Review In a world of generic smartphones where even Apple and Samsung seem to be converging on the same design, HTC has designed phones that are pretty distinctive – the HTC One is one of the very few brands you can recognise from across a room.
Andrew Orlowski, 27 Mar 2015

'Why don't you buy from foreign sites?' asks Commish, snapping on the gloves

The European Commission is to probe the e-commerce sector to find out why people aren’t buying across borders.
Jennifer Baker, 27 Mar 2015

Microsoft and Oracle are 'not your trusted friends', public sector bods

Software providers such as Microsoft and Oracle are aggressively targeting public sector customers with licence "audit reviews" in a bid to plug falling subscription revenue, according to research.
Kat Hall, 27 Mar 2015
2

SanDisk slashes sales outlook as growth shudders to a stop

SanDisk expects the current quarter's revenues to be about $1.3bn, 14 per cent less than a year ago, with the flash business supposed to be a growth area. The execs must have been horrified when they heard.
Chris Mellor, 27 Mar 2015

Labour has a pop at the government over missed GDS targets

In a pre-election pop at the coalition, Labour has slammed Cabinet Office minister Francis Maude for the Government Digital Service's failure to meet even half of its digital targets for online services.
Kat Hall, 27 Mar 2015
ATLAS (A Toroidal LHC Apparatus) is one of six detector experiments at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) – image by Maximilien Brice CERN/Science photo library
8

What is HPC actually good for? Just you wait and see

High Performance Computing (HPC) is all terribly exciting. We get announcements about this supercluster or that beating the number of teraflops of that other one (or, more likely these days, petaflops). Or maybe it's data throughput or storage size or even transfer rates.
Tim Worstall, 27 Mar 2015
BT Openreach van

Vodafone: So what exactly is 'ludicrous' about the Frontier report?

Vodafone has struck back at BT’s claim that the Frontier Economics report on Openreach’s apparent profiteering is “ludicrous”, with Matthew Braovac, Vodafone's head of competition and regulatory affairs, writing to his BT opposite number asking for a justification of the claims.
Simon Rockman, 27 Mar 2015
5

Europe drags, as Accenture posts steady growth

Outsourcing giant Accenture posted a yearly sales increase of five per cent to $7.5bn (£5bn) for its second quarter results, highlighting its "digital" investments as a reason for the consistent growth.
Kat Hall, 27 Mar 2015
Dog using a satnav, Mark Robinson

Satnav launches are like buses: none for ages then three arrive at once

Satellite navigation satellites turn out to be a lot like buses: there's none for ages, then three come along all at once.
Simon Sharwood, 27 Mar 2015
Microsoft Surface Pro 3

Surface Pro 3 update has so much new stuff for sysadmins, we can't fit it all in one headline

Microsoft has released a significant new firmware update for Surface Pro 3 fondleslabs, the second to arrive this month.
Neil McAllister, 27 Mar 2015

700,000 beautiful women do the bidding of one Twitter-scamming man

Satnam Narang of Symantec says one scammer was so taken with Twitter he established 750,000 accounts.
Darren Pauli, 27 Mar 2015
Gotenna offers secure communications

Bongfire of Inanity: Jakarta rozzers enforce mass chill-out

A community in West Jakarta was left dazed, confused and peckish after the local rozzers decided to "destroy" three and a half tonnes of cannabis on a bonfire.
3

Turnbull's Digital Transformation Office to 'leave you quivering with excitement'

Australia's communications minister Malcolm Turnbull has revealed a little more about his Digital Transformation Office (DTO), the agency he's tasked with making it possible to perform all interactions with the federal government online.
Simon Sharwood, 27 Mar 2015
arrow pointing up
8

VMware tells partners, punters, to pay higher prices (probably)

VMware has almost certainly increased the prices it charges to partners and customers.
Simon Sharwood, 27 Mar 2015
Zuck's flying internet death star

LOOK OUT, Brits – is that a Facebook LASER-GUN drone above us?

F8 2015 Facebook is still banging on about fleets of solar-powered, laser-firing drones that beam a glimpse of the internet to far-flung corners of the globe.
Shaun Nichols, 27 Mar 2015
Diving Board from Seattle Municipal archives

Microsoft performs reverse full-hybrid with an on-premises twist

Microsoft has made a few changes to its Azure Site Recovery and Azure Backup services.
Simon Sharwood, 27 Mar 2015
2

Court recording biz with clients EVERYWHERE has forums breached

Australian court transcription company "For The Record" – which bills itself as "The No.1 digital evidence recording platform in the world" and says its products are "used in courtrooms throughout North America, Europe and Asia" – has had its forum hacked.
Darren Pauli, 27 Mar 2015
3

Optus must hire checkbox champion after epic router, voicemail borking

Optus has escaped a financial penalty imposed Australia's privacy boss and instead must review its internal security measures after it shipped hundreds of thousands of routers with open internet ports and default credentials, opened voice mails, and marked public scores of private phone numbers.
Darren Pauli, 27 Mar 2015
Solidfire_front
3

Hey, you just picked up a Solidfire flash box? Dude, you bought a Dell

Dell is selling Solidfire's all-flash arrays to service providers.
Chris Mellor, 27 Mar 2015
Random numbers
7

'Bar Mitzvah attack' should see off ancient and crocked RC4 algo

Security boffin Itsik Mantin has found a new attack based on old weaknesses that is the first 'practical' attack on SSL that does not require man-in-the-middle to steal sensitive data from RC4 algorithms.
Darren Pauli, 27 Mar 2015
Puppet Labs Logo
1

Puppet Labs pulls strings on Docker, AWS and bare metal

Puppet Labs is adding code management and updates to its Node Manager in a big refresh in Puppet Enterprise 3.8.

Metadata laws pass so it's time to STOP READING LISTICLES

Rugby player Sonny Bill Williams is a role model for many, a fact that's not gone un-noticed by the purveyors of a dubious fitness supplement who've created an ad that looks an awful lot like a news story about the athlete. Williams has nothing to do with the ad or the product. He's just been used to get people clicking. And if you do click on the link to the “story”, you're taken to a page on which you're offered the chance to buy the supplement.
Simon Sharwood, 26 Mar 2015
Booth babe banhammer

Bye bye, booth babes. IT security catwalk RSA nixes sexy outfits

The organizers of this year's RSA security conference have made at least one thing clear to exhibitors: no booth babes.
Shaun Nichols, 26 Mar 2015
Anthony Hopkins as Odin in Marvel's Thor
6

By Odin, Parallels thinks cloud service providers should buy Odin

Parallels is changing its branding again – partly – this time to help customers better distinguish between its virtualization software and service provider businesses.
Neil McAllister, 26 Mar 2015
Tintri
3

This just in from our Chief SATA Officer: Tintri trio takes off to mystery startup

Hybrid storage array startup Tintri has lost three executives in one fell swoop to another upstart. The trio of leavers are:
Chris Mellor, 26 Mar 2015

Silicon Valley powers: Let mass spying die in May 2015 – it's bad for privacy (and business)

Apple, Microsoft, Facebook, Google, Yahoo! – and many, many others – have appealed to American politicians and g-men to rein in mass digital surveillance this May, and bring the intelligence community under some kind of effective oversight.
Iain Thomson, 26 Mar 2015
Node.js 'hello world' webserver

Want a full-blown IDE for Node.js? You'll need a Windows machine...

Microsoft has doubled down on its support for the Node.js server-side JavaScript framework with a new set of tools that turn Visual Studio into a full-fledged Node.js IDE.
Neil McAllister, 26 Mar 2015
6

Win some, lose some: Motorola 1, patent troll 1

Motorola Mobility got some bad news and good news on Wednesday when a US jury found it ripped off an Intellectual Ventures-owned technology patent although denied a second infringement claim.
Shaun Nichols, 26 Mar 2015

I see you have the gTLD that goes .ping!

The company behind Ping golf clubs and owner of ping.com has paid domain name overseer ICANN $1.5m for the rights to the top-level domain .ping.
Kieren McCarthy, 26 Mar 2015
Don Box, Microsoft Distinguished Engineer

Hey, Microsoft, we can call Windows 10 apps anything we like – you're NOT OUR REAL MOM

Diagasm You can forget about Universal Apps, we're not supposed to use that term from now on. When Windows 10 arrives, what Microsoft has so far been calling Universal Apps will be known as "Windows apps."
Tim Anderson, 26 Mar 2015

Amazon cloud threatens to SMASH the fundamental laws of PHYSICS

Amazon hopes to knacker its competitors in the cloud world by offering endless online storage space for a flat yearly fee.
Iain Thomson, 26 Mar 2015

Light the lanterns people, Acer made a profit in 2014

A recovery of sorts is taking place at Acer with calendar 2014 P&L accounts returning to the black in a meaningful way, bringing closure to three consecutive years of losses.
Paul Kunert, 26 Mar 2015
FacebookPDU
9

Facebook sued: Data center designs 'nicked' for Open Compute

Facebook is being sued in the US by a UK biz, which claims Zuckerberg & Co stole its blueprints for data centers.
Gavin Clarke, 26 Mar 2015
4

50 BILLION devices: The future that Juniper Networks wants to tap

Juniper Networks wants to produce products capable of transforming networks to capitalise on new growth opportunities brought on by the connected world. That is, essentially, its raison d'être.
 Dummy hand grenades are used by the Marines from the 3rd Low Altitude Air Defense Battalion, for practice before throwing the M-67 Fragment Grenades at the firing range.jpg

PayPal settles over WMD sanction-breaking transaction claims

PayPal has agreed to a $7.6m settlement with the US Treasury after allegedly processing transactions for parties including a nuclear weapons proliferator.
data centre

SCC: the hosted voice market? Yep, we've got plans for that

Building more bit barn capacity, and beefing up security and hosted voice services - potentially via acquisition - are the next moves that SCC CEO James Rigby is plotting from his Birmingham-based war room.
Paul Kunert, 26 Mar 2015

Dutch Transport Inspectorate raid Uber's Amsterdam office

The Dutch Transport Inspectorate is carrying out raids on Uber's Amsterdam office as it investigates allegations that the ride-sharing company is continuing to operate its banned uberPOP service.
Web browsers
3

Google promises Pointer Events support, with or without Apple

Google has backtracked on its decision not to implement Pointer Events in the Blink web browser engine used by its Chrome browser.
Tim Anderson, 26 Mar 2015
management management

Ex-Insight director Griffiths moves to CMS Distribution

Former Insight EMEA director Justin Griffiths has rocked up at ambitious tech supplier CMS Distribution.
Paul Kunert, 26 Mar 2015
chain_relationship_channel

NetApp channel: Can the new UK boss stop the rot?

NetApp practically wrote the first chapter on how to build a well-functioning and contented channel, but that was before it was squeezed by cloud providers and converged storage upstarts.
Paul Kunert, 26 Mar 2015
3

Hedvig all set to Google-ise that enterprise storage

Start-up Hedvig aims to bring Google/Amazon cloud-style storage to enterprises, with a virtualised pool of storage aggregated from distributed silos.
Chris Mellor, 26 Mar 2015
Seattle cityscape made from computer parts
6

Watch out Wizard, Bezos wants the Emerald City for himself

Amazon has agreed to lease two more buildings in the South Lake Union neighbourhood of Seattle, in a deal leaving the company occupying a quarter of the city's best office space.
Register Roundtable at the Soho hotel
7

How tech bosses manage their teams for fun and profit

CIO Manifesto It's seven years on from the great crash and IT departments are moving from the bunker mentality of keeping the lights on and maintaining legacy VB6. But what does that mean for the way we manage tech teams?
Dominic Connor, 26 Mar 2015

Does your broadband feel faster? Akamai says it went up 20 per cent*

Broadband speeds around the world increased by 20 per cent, year on year, according to internet tentacle monster Akamai.
Shaun Nichols, 26 Mar 2015
The farmers persuade the bull into a pen
7

Part of CAP IT system may be scrapped after digital fail – MPs

The digital interface of the Rural Payments Agency's Common Agricultural Payments IT system – which was paused in an embarrassing U-turn last week – may not be reinstated, MPs heard yesterday.
Kat Hall, 26 Mar 2015
Motorway surveillance control room
6

Silent server monitoring: A neat little cure that doesn't kill the patient

It’s a typical day in IT. A quirky and poorly developed application meant to be on the testing server sneaks into production. Before anyone realises what's happened (something that can sadly take some organisations months) hundreds of external users are using it. Uh oh.
John Nicholson, 26 Mar 2015
George_Kurian

NetApp veep: 'We've shifted 750,000 all-flash arrays'. Er, really?

UPDATED Interview There has been a sea change in the FlashRay project, NetApp's ground-up all-flash array product development, with execs leaving and the project being absorbed into the overall ONTAP organisation. So we interviewed George Kurian, NetApp's product operations EVP, to find out about FlashRay's status and positioning, and NetApp's all-flash product portfolio.
Chris Mellor, 26 Mar 2015

How a hack on Prince Philip's Prestel account led to UK computer law

This week marks the 30th anniversary of arrests in the infamous Prestel hack case. It led to arrests, breached the Royal Family's security and helped give birth to the UK's first computer crime law.
John Leyden, 26 Mar 2015
Kinetic_4TB_drive
4

SNIA examines standardised access to object-based disk drives

The Storage Networking Industry Association (SNIA) has a tech workgroup looking at object-based disk drives, such as Seagate’s Kinetic product, and is aiming to standardise access.
Chris Mellor, 26 Mar 2015
Apple MacBook Pro 13-in WRD early 2015

Force your hand: Apple 13-inch MacBook Pro with Retina Display

Review Last year’s update to the MacBook Pro was more notable for its £100 price cut than the modest speed bump that accompanied it. However, this year’s model is a more interesting kettle of fish, as it introduces Intel’s latest Broadwell processors to the Mac range, along with Apple’s new Force Touch trackpad doohickey.
Stephen Dean, 26 Mar 2015
Derisive laugh

BT slams ‘ludicrous’ Openreach report as Vodafone smirks

BT has labelled a report into its apparently inflated return on broadband investment as "ludicrous", as Vodafone calls on the government to tighten the regulations surrounding Openreach.
Simon Rockman, 26 Mar 2015

Get off Facebook if you value your privacy, EU commish tells court

If you don’t want your personal info pored over by the US authorities, close your Facebook account – such is the reassuring advice given by the European Commission to the European Court of Justice.
Jennifer Baker, 26 Mar 2015

I helped Amazon.com find an XSS hole and all I got was this lousy t-shirt

Amazon has patched dangerous cross-site scripting (XSS) vulnerability in its website that exposed accounts to hijacking.
Darren Pauli, 26 Mar 2015
5

Wannabe a nano-bot-manufacturing giant? Better cozy up to Apple

Apple's demand for minute mechanical gizmos in its iThings is more or less dictating who wins and who loses among MEMS manufacturers, analysts reckon.
Shaun Nichols, 26 Mar 2015

Hacker builds cheatbot for hit app Trivia Crack

Security researcher Randy Westergren has reverse engineered super popular app Trivia Crack, recompiled it to help cheaters and along the way showed how to turn it into nastyware.
Darren Pauli, 26 Mar 2015

Google throws a 180 on its plans for Dart language

Back in 2013, Google felt the Dart language deserved a native virtual machine baked into Chrome, because it felt JavaScript couldn't deliver the speed it craves. It therefore started the process of getting Dart turned into a standard to help things along.
Simon Sharwood, 26 Mar 2015
My bowls of stew and rice

A Quid A Day for NOSH? Luxury!

WiF It's that time of year as El Reg limbers up for the Quid A Day Nosh campaign and I'm here to point out that in context this is actually a pretty easy challenge.
Tim Worstall, 26 Mar 2015
Funny money from south of the river
6

When cash is King, mobile money means economic freedom

Last month, flipping through the pages of the Daily Nation - Kenya’s tabloid newspaper of crime, politics and corruption - I came across the story of a police officer undone by his mobile. It seems this officer - who earned the equivalent of a few hundred dollars a year - saw many times that amount pass through his hands on a daily basis.
Mark Pesce, 26 Mar 2015
A 'Virtual Nose' designed to lessen motion sickness in simulations

'Virtual nose' makes VR less dizzying, say boffins

A Purdue University undergraduate has picked a way to stop virtual reality inducing motion sickness: program in a virtual nose.
Simon Sharwood, 26 Mar 2015
Privacy image

Samsung forgets fingerprints, focuses its eye on YOURS

When Samsung shoved the Galaxy S5 out the door last year, one of the things it put front and centre was the new ability to log on with one's fingerprint.
NASA ARM rock-grabber

NASA: We're gonna rip up an ASTEROID and make it ORBIT the MOON

NASA has decided that putting a lump of rock from an asteroid into orbit around the Moon is better than trying to hook a whole asteroid.
Dark Souls II knighty knight

Chipzilla spawns 60-core, six-teraflop Xeon Phi MONSTER CHIP

Intel has set some rumours to rest, giving a media and analyst briefing outlining details of its coming 60-plus core Knights Landing Xeon Phi chip.
Stanley Kubrick's The Shining
2

Cisco patches IOS to stop automation exploitation

Cisco's turned up vulnerabilities in automation software that open the door to denial-of-service and limited access to devices.
Rickmote

Chrome trumps all comers in reported vulnerabilities

More vulnerabilities were discovered in Google Chrome last year than any other piece of core internet software – that's according to research that also found 2014 clocked record numbers of zero-day flaws.
Darren Pauli, 26 Mar 2015
Columbia University's full-duplex IC
2

Big barrier to 5G cracked by full-duplex chippery

Take a look at mobile standards like LTE and you'll notice that duplexing is difficult: it's either accomplished by separating uplink and downlink in time or frequency.
Terminators
4

When will ROBOTS start chatting on WhatsApp? Don't hold your breath, says co-founder

F8 2015 As much as developers might want WhatsApp to publish APIs to allow other software to access its popular chat service, the Facebook subsidiary has no plans to do so.
Neil McAllister, 26 Mar 2015
1

Facebook hopes devs will 'Like' how mobile SDKs, Graph API have scrubbed up

F8 2015 Facebook has used the occasion of its F8 developer conference in San Francisco this year to roll out a major update to its software development kits for Android and iOS, in addition to a new version of the API for accessing its social graph data.
Neil McAllister, 26 Mar 2015
Diablo: Reaper of Souls modes
2

Diablo escapes from patent hell, condemns Netlist to legal purgatory

Diablo Technologies, a supplier of Memory Channel Storage (MCS) that makes it possible to present flash disks as memory, says it has seen off a patent lawsuit from rival Netlist.
Simon Sharwood, 26 Mar 2015
Red Hat
1

Wall Street tips fedora to Red Hat: Sales up, profit flat, everybody dance

Red Hat's shares are on the up after the Linux distro maker beat Wall Street's expectations in its fourth financial quarter, ended February 28.
Iain Thomson, 26 Mar 2015