The Week in Summary

Bug bounties

Adobe launches cashless bug bounty

Adobe has launched a bug bounty program that hands out high-fives, not cash.
Darren Pauli, 06 Mar 2015
The Tanami Desert en route to Willowara

Australia's new broadband satellites won't be all the help Willowra needs

One of the things we've been asked about our project to figure out how to improve network performance at the Wirliyajarrayi Learning Centre in the remote Australian town of Willowra is why we are bothering.
2

US Senators hope to crack down on the trade of private information

Four US senators are introducing legislation aimed at turning the screws on businesses that gather up and sell citizens' personal information.
Shaun Nichols, 06 Mar 2015
VR

AMD LiquidVR toolkit takes the vomit out of virtual reality

AMD, always the more graphics-minded of the two x86 powerhouses behind PCs, is gearing up to cash in on the virtual reality craze with a developer kit that should smooth out some of the problems with the nascent technology.
Iain Thomson, 06 Mar 2015
Quooker Fusion
2

Microsoft comes right out and says backup software is dead

Microsoft's been making lots of noise lately about its send-your-snapshots-to-the-cloud service Azure Site Recovery. But now it's come right out and said it: Redmond reckons backup software deserves to die.
Simon Sharwood, 06 Mar 2015

Australia's digital technologies curriculum parked AGAIN

Australia's proposed digital technologies curriculum, which would see kids taught computational thinking for the first ten years of their schooling, has been parked again.
Simon Sharwood, 06 Mar 2015
9

FREAKing hell: All Windows versions vulnerable to SSL snoop

Microsoft says its implementation of SSL/TLS in all versions of Windows is vulnerable to the FREAK encryption-downgrade attack.
Darren Pauli, 06 Mar 2015
Telstra phone booth by Ed Dunens from Flickr https://www.flickr.com/photos/blachswan/
1

Telstra to let customers access their own metadata for AU$25

Australia's dominant carrier, Telstra, will give its customers the chance to access their metadata, for a fee.
Simon Sharwood, 06 Mar 2015
Keep out sign with deleted expletive
8

US watchdog: Anthem snubbed our security audits before and after enormous hack attack

A year or so before American health insurer Anthem admitted it had been ruthlessly ransacked by hackers, a US federal watchdog had offered to audit the giant's computer security – but was rebuffed.
Shaun Nichols, 05 Mar 2015
Docker Red Hat

Red Hat seeks cloud critical mass with Atomic Host

Red Hat says its stripped-down Linux variant for containerized cloud deployments is ready to roll, giving Red Hat customers a simplified, easy-to-manage platform for hosting Docker containers.
Neil McAllister, 05 Mar 2015

Turnbull says no need to future-proof NBN

Those who feel Australia should invest in a future-proof National Broadband Network (NBN), and that a fibre-to-the-premises (FTTP) network offers the best long-term investment, have new reason to take umbrage with the nation's communications minister Malcolm Turnbull after he yesterday said a quick-and-cheap approach is the best way to deliver broadband.
Simon Sharwood, 05 Mar 2015
Google car

Bad news: Robo-cars will make you work BILLIONS more hours. Good news: In 2040

A new report from management consultants McKinsey & Co. suggests the widespread adoption of autonomous cars will save billions of man-hours a year (or make us all work more hours, depending on your outlook) but not for a while.
Iain Thomson, 05 Mar 2015
Invasion of the Body Snatchers

VMware sued, accused of ripping off Linux kernel source code

Linux kernel developer Christoph Hellwig has sued VMware in Hamburg, Germany, over alleged violations of the GNU General Public License.
Neil McAllister, 05 Mar 2015

Canadian bloke refuses to hand over phone password, gets cuffed

A 38-year-old Canadian citizen has been arrested for refusing to hand over his smartphone's password to border agents.
Kieren McCarthy, 05 Mar 2015
Intel NUC
7

Intel slaps Iris Pro GPUs into Core i7 silicon to woo desktop gamers

Intel is bunging its Iris Pro graphics circuits into its fifth-generation "Broadwell" Core i7 processor to catch the eyes of gamers. And the chip giant has been working with Microsoft and GPU toolkit-maker Raptr to optimize game code.
Iain Thomson, 05 Mar 2015
9

Office for Mac 2016 Preview: This letter will self-destruct in 60 days

Microsoft has released the first preview build of Office for Mac 2016, its next edition of the software for Apple PCs.
Shaun Nichols, 05 Mar 2015
Houses of Parliament at night-time
4

World’s oldest IT dining society breaks into the House of Lords

Promo If you’ve ever wanted to network like a lord while having your brain stretched, now’s your chance. Venerable tech dining society The Real Time Club is holding a dinner at the House of Lords on 12 March.
Dominic Connor, 05 Mar 2015
3

IBM System x biz sales: The numbers are out... and they're not pretty

The extent of the slide in System x sales in Blighty during the final year under IBM ownership was laid bare today, and the eye-watering declines were bad: bad meaning bad, not bad meaning good.
Paul Kunert, 05 Mar 2015
3

Sales up at NSA SIM hack scandal biz Gemalto

Sales at the world's biggest SIM card maker, Gemalto, which was last month revealed to have been hacked by the NSA and GCHQ, rose by five per cent to €2.5bn (£1.8bn) in 2014.
Kat Hall, 05 Mar 2015

Danwood CEO: No more M&A disco watching for us

Danwood no longer wants to be the loner at the edge of the M&A dance floor as romance blossoms between local rivals, especially now its finances suggest it isn’t destined for the scrapheap.
Paul Kunert, 05 Mar 2015

Revealed: Facebook Boss Zuckerberg's One Weird Trick When Hiring

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg only hires people he would work for, which, using the same principle of reciprocity, presumably means he'd work for every single person contributing freely to his giant content farm ad platform.
Kat Hall, 05 Mar 2015
she should look alarmed

Virtual reality WHIPLASH CHAIR in shutdown scare

MWC 2015 Incongruous among the mobile marketing solutions and miscellaneous apps in the Spanish section at Mobile World Congress was the VR experience from Spanish company Whiplash.
Simon Rockman, 05 Mar 2015
4

PATCH FREAK NOW: Cloud providers faulted for slow response

Hundreds of cloud providers are still vulnerable to the serious FREAK cryptographic vulnerability.
John Leyden, 05 Mar 2015
Jeff_Hausman

The Hausman interview: CloudPhysics' analytics strategy revealed

Harmsel biz blog CloudPhysics uses Big Data analytics techniques to look into virtualised infrastructures and improve data centre operations. It operates with a Software-as-a-Service (SaaS) model and offers predictive analytics.
a coffee cup topped with cappucino foam with a wi-fi symbol sprinkled on top in powdered chocolate
6

Why Wi-Fi won't solve mobile telcos' data dilemma

If mobile operators rely upon Wi-Fi to relieve themselves of data traffic they are going to need to find some way to get the data home. Right now they're heading for a data bottleneck.
Simon Rockman, 05 Mar 2015

Upper house of Parliament joins the drone debate

The House of Lords has today called for an online database or app to track and manage the growing use of civilian drones.
Kat Hall, 05 Mar 2015

‪Obama criticises China's mandatory backdoor tech import rules

US prez Barack ‪Obama has criticised China's new tech rules‬, urging the country to reverse the policy if it wants a business-as-usual situation with the US to continue.
John Leyden, 05 Mar 2015
NS5700

Super SSD tech: Fancy a bonkers 8TB all-flash PC?

Fancy an 8TB SSD? Put one in a PC or notebook and you've got yourself a smoking hot system, fast and with a gaping capacity for data.
Chris Mellor, 05 Mar 2015
Despair.com's definition of Idiocy
9

Another day, another load of benchmarketing, this time from HDS

Storagebod I had hoped we’d moved beyond the SPC-1 benchmarketing but it appears not. If you read HDS veep Hu Yoshida’s blog, apparently the VSP G1000 is "the clear leader in storage performance against the leading all flash storage arrays."
StorageBod, 05 Mar 2015
3

Symantec: Corporate divorce starts on April Fool's Day

Symantec is to operate as two separate storage and security organisations from April Fool’s Day, as the deadly serious game of long-term survival begins in earnest.
Paul Kunert, 05 Mar 2015
3

CloudExpo makes me thirsty. Barman, a pint of storagebeer for my friend

Storagebod It’s late notice for the CloudExpo crowd, but it has been suggested that we need another #storagebeers event and a pretty good opportunity has presented itself.
StorageBod, 05 Mar 2015
Retro room lighting

How many Androids does it take to change a light bulb?

Breaking Fad For an awfully long time, there have been just two types of lights, more or less. There were ordinary incandescent bulbs and there were fluorescent ones. Sometimes, there were fancy circular fluorescent ones, but that was about as complicated as it got – save for fiddly things like the battle between weirdo continental screw fittings and the mighty British bayonet cap.
Nigel Whitfield, 05 Mar 2015

Win! El Reg exceedingly fine mug collection

Prize draw OK Muggles, we are promoting Cash 'n' Carrion, The Register's merchandise store, this time with a mugtastic prize draw.
David Gordon, 05 Mar 2015
A boffin
1

Cisco, MapR first to top Big Data TPC benchmark tree

Cisco and MapR have posted the first Big Data TPCx-HS benchmark, but, of course, there's nothing to actually compare it with yet.
Chris Mellor, 05 Mar 2015

Broadband routers: SOHOpeless and vendors don't care

Feature Feature "It is far more common to find routers with critical flaws than without" - Craig Young "It's sad that end-user education about strong passwords, password safes, and phishing can be undone by something as innocuous as the blinking box in the corner of your room. - Peter Adkins Introduction Home and small business …
Darren Pauli, 05 Mar 2015
Angry woman on mobile

Euro ministers ditch plan to ban roaming charges

Europe’s telco ministers appear to have done a U-turn over a proposed total removal of mobile phone roaming charges by the end of the year.
Jennifer Baker, 05 Mar 2015
The European flag
7

EU annoys industry and activists with net neutrality proposal

Europe’s telco ministers have finally come to an agreement on net neutrality – but it’s one that makes both digital activists and industry unhappy.
Jennifer Baker, 05 Mar 2015

UK spaceport, phase two: Now where do we PUT the bleeding thing?

The UK's Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) has narrowed its shortlist of potential locations for Europe's first spaceport, which would provide a UK base for future commercial space flights and satellite launches.
OUT-LAW.COM, 05 Mar 2015
Web browsers
5

Choc Factory splatters 51 bugs, Mozilla bumps cert checker

Google and Firefox have upgraded their flagship browsers, crushing bugs and cracking down on bad certificates along the way.
Darren Pauli, 05 Mar 2015

'Hi, I'm from Microsoft and I am GOING TO KILL YOU'

Apparently, the growing hobby of tagging along with “Microsoft tech support” scam calls to waste their time is starting to bug the scammers, with a Canadian man reportedly threatened by a caller from India.
4

'Domain shadowing' hijacks registrar accounts to spawn attack sites

Fiends behind the world's most infamous exploit kit Angler are stealing login credentials to create tens of thousands of pop-up domains used in hit-and-run -style attacks.
Darren Pauli, 05 Mar 2015
Sex, Drugs and Rock n Roll
9

IBM's secret growth plan is … Karaoke?

IBM might be planning a karaoke-led-resurgence, if a new patent application titled “Enhancing karaoke systems utilizing audience sentiment feedback and audio watermarking” is any guide.
Simon Sharwood, 05 Mar 2015
Huawei HQ
2

Huawei to build 5G patent book

MWC1015 Huawei has talked up its plans for 5G at Mobile World Congress, with an emphasis on building its patent book for the next mobile standard.

.hotels. .hoteis ... not a typo but a window into ICANN's baffling world

Analysis Domain-name overseer ICANN is facing widespread criticism after it emerged victorious from an independent review into its decision over the top-level domain .hotels.
Kieren McCarthy, 05 Mar 2015

Australia threatens to pull buckets of astronomy funding

A political impasse is putting at risk Australia's participation in the ginormous Square Kilometre Array (SKA) radio telescope*, along with a slew of other major research science projects.
Frontier Developments' Elite:Dangerous Logo

Frontier promises it won't 'dumb down' Elite: Dangerous for Xbox

The Elite: Dangerous massively multiplayer online role-playing game is breaking its reliance on the PC and coming to consoles, but maker Frontier Developments has told players not to panic – there'll be no compromises made in the translation.
Iain Thomson, 05 Mar 2015
Homo jaw

Boffins find Earth's earliest Homo in Ethiopian hilltop

It looks like mankind's earliest ancestors go back a lot further than first thought. After 13 years digging in the Rift Valley region of Ethiopia, team of researchers have found a 2.8-million-year-old jawbone from our genus.
Iain Thomson, 05 Mar 2015

Apple: We could expose our WHOPPING 12 INCH iPad - but it's not real

Apple has reportedly delayed the manufacturing of its much speculated-upon - yet never confirmed - 12.9in iPad.
Shaun Nichols, 05 Mar 2015

Storm in a K-Cup: My SHAME over the eco-monster I created, says coffee pod inventor

The inventor of the increasingly popular – and apparently environmentally unfriendly – coffee pod feels guilty about his invention.
Kieren McCarthy, 05 Mar 2015
Hadoop_elephant

Cisco wraps Hadoop in warm embrace of resale partnership

Cisco wants to keep it in the family: since the Internet of Things is going to be a source of lots of data, it's signed reseller agreements with Cloudera, Hortonworks and MapR.

Snowden, NSA spying, hard drive malware ... what we need is a UN privacy watchdog!

The Electronic Frontier Foundation thinks the United Nations needs to get its arse in gear and safeguard people's privacy from government snoops.
Shaun Nichols, 04 Mar 2015
Files on shelves
3

Connected Data gets serious about the business of file sharing

It’s now available in Europe – yep, Connected Data has upped its peer-to-peer, file sync ’n share game with Transporter for Business, a way of sharing files that has no public cloud security risk at all.
Chris Mellor, 04 Mar 2015
Containers

Docker hires'n'acquires to cure its security, networking headaches

Application container firm Docker is staffing up, having brought on new talent to further its security and networking development efforts.
Neil McAllister, 04 Mar 2015
Deflated dome at Waihopai Base

Complicit Kiwis sniffed Pacific comms says Snowden

New Zealand snooped on friendly Pacific island nations' communications to hand the haul to the NSA, according to the latest nugget to pop out of Edward Snowden's PR machine.
Uber - living the dream
1

Uber snaps up hip map startup

Uber, the "sharing economy" company which rose to infamy for being accused of profiteering during the Sydney siege, has bought data mapping and search startup deCarta.
Kat Hall, 04 Mar 2015
Earth
1

'Data center OS' Mesophere plans 2015 hire and roadmap drive

When Mesosphere landed $36m VC funding in December 2014 it also released the first part of its Datacenter Operating System (DCOS).
Gavin Clarke, 04 Mar 2015
IBM Watson QA Power7 cluster
5

IBM buys 'deep learning' upstart Alchemy API, hires 40,000 devs

Big Blue has taken a break from its busy axe wielding cost-cutting schedule to buy startup AlchemyAPI and insert 40,000 developers into its "community".
Kat Hall, 04 Mar 2015
Shield controller

Nvidia waves 4King big Android Shield at games console warzone

Pic Nvidia is tossing its hat into the already crowded home console market with an Android-powered gaming device - the Shield.
Shaun Nichols, 04 Mar 2015
Total War: Shogun 2
8

WHY are GoDaddy and Verisign stockpiling patents? Do I smell war?

A raft of patent applications has presaged a possible legal war in the rapidly expanding domain-name industry.
Kieren McCarthy, 04 Mar 2015
Stegosaurus

Sophie the Stegosaurus was a teenaged fat lass claims triple-D model

Pic + vid Scientists at the Natural History Museum have used 3D models to work out what its famous Stegosaurus would have weighed when she was alive. And the answer is: a lot.
Iain Thomson, 04 Mar 2015

International effort to wrangle t'internet from NSA fizzles out in chaos

The launch of the ICANN-Brazil-led internet power grab dubbed NetMundial has been cancelled for a second time, raising questions over its continued existence.
Kieren McCarthy, 04 Mar 2015
HP cloud
4

HP: Windows Server + OpenStack will lure biz bods from the Amazon

Hewlett-Packard is gunning for Amazon's corporate cloud business, with fully backed Windows Server on its cloud.
Gavin Clarke, 04 Mar 2015
Parliament in the clouds
3

Stop press! NHS trust finds G-Cloud, BUYS SOMETHING with it

G-Cloud can help public sector buyers dodge the bureaucracy of a European tender process – but there is no centralised coalition-led push to get more agencies and departments using it.
Paul Kunert, 04 Mar 2015
Samsung pre-announces Office 365 deal with Microsoft

Samsung-Microsoft deal will bundle Office 365 with Android Knox

MWC 2015 The man behind Samsung Knox, Dr Injong Rhee, says a deal with Microsoft will see Office 365 bundled with the Knox secure enterprise workspace.
Tim Anderson, 04 Mar 2015
Files in manager's desk drawers: manila folder marked "Redundancies". Image via shutterstock
6

IBM may swing axe on same departments more than once

Such is the lack of job security at IBM that staff in certain departments could be at risk of redundancy on more than one occasion during this year, The Channel can reveal.
Paul Kunert, 04 Mar 2015

Paul Allen hunts down sunken Japanese WWII super-battleship

Pics A team led by Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen has located the final resting place of monster Japanese battleship Musashi, some 70 years after she was consigned to the depths off the Philippines during the 1944 Battle of Leyte Gulf.
Lester Haines, 04 Mar 2015
L'Entreprenant over the battle of Fleurus
6

SanDisk flash array launch signals imminent AFA battle

Comment With SanDisk joining the ranks of all-flash array vendors, that makes 15 AFA suppliers I know of: far, far too many for industry stability.
Chris Mellor, 04 Mar 2015
Statler and Waldorf - copyright - The Walt Disney company - the muppets studio
2

Speaking in Tech: Tinder Plus: 4 times pricier... if you're an OVER-28 wrinkly

Podcast Podcast It's another episode of El Reg's best and only tech podcast with your hosts Greg Knieriemen, Ed Saipetch and Sarah Vela. This week, they dig into HP's acquisition of Aruba, Tinder pricing for the *cough* elderly and the prospects for Google+.
Team Register, 04 Mar 2015
Sagus_V2 Top Spec phone
8

Saygus aims buffed up V2 Android mobe at Samsung

MWC 2015 At a pre-MWC preview, Utah-based Saygus showed off its V2 Android phone, which turns up a notch all the specs.
Simon Rockman, 04 Mar 2015

Lost WHITE CITY of the MONKEY GOD found after 500 years

In a scene straight from Raiders of the Lost Ark, archaeologists believe they have found the fabled lost White City of the Monkey God in Honduras.
Kat Hall, 04 Mar 2015
Man in an orange jumpsuit clutches prison bars. Image by Shutterstock
4

Ex-Systemax execs Carl & Gilbert Fiorentino jailed over $27m fraud

Shamed former Systemax execs Gilbert and Carl Fiorentino were last night sentenced to five and six years in the slammer respectively for masterminding a $27m fraud when employed at the company.
Paul Kunert, 04 Mar 2015
TwitterIPO

Twitter fears big EU tech payout to pacify lawmakers over data-slurping concerns

A fretful Twitter has told investors that it may be forced to shell out cash on IT infrastructure in Europe if the Safe Harbor pact between the EU and the US collapses.
Kelly Fiveash, 04 Mar 2015

Mummy, what's the point of Evgeny Morozov's tedious columns?

Worstall on Wednesday I often find myself mystified by Evgeny Morozov and his writings. I find it terribly difficult to work out what he's actually for, or what worldview it is that he thinks he's propagating.
Tim Worstall, 04 Mar 2015
connections_global_internet

How does a global corporation switch to IP Voice?

Not so long ago I worked with a company that had more than a dozen offices around the world. Each had its own phone system – a total of five different makes – of which only two could handle IP telephony.
Dave Cartwright, 04 Mar 2015
6

'Security, privacy' main barrier to 'government cloud' rollout in EU

Security and privacy issues are holding back "the cloudification of governmental services" in the EU, according to a new report.
OUT-LAW.COM, 04 Mar 2015
Good riddance to bad Java

Oracle's piping hot new pot of Java takes out the trash (faster)

Oracle's latest update to the Java Development Kit doesn't add any new language features or change any APIs, but it still includes a number of enhancements that should please Java developers and users.
Neil McAllister, 04 Mar 2015

Privacy? What privacy? EU's draft law on your data is useless, say digital rights orgs

Activists have leaked the latest draft of Europe’s planned data protection law – which is supposed to safeguard Europeans' personal information when in the hands of businesses and governments.
Jennifer Baker, 04 Mar 2015

D-Link removes fingers from ears, preps mass router patch

Domestic router Daddy D-Link is patching dangerous remote access flaws in several models of its networking gear.
Darren Pauli, 04 Mar 2015

£280k Kickstarter camera trigger campaign crashes and burns

Backers of a Kickstarter campaign which raised a whopping £290k for the development of the Triggertrap Ada modular camera trigger have been left furious and seriously out of pocket after the company behind the product announced it couldn't deliver and would refund just 20 per cent of punters' cash.
Lester Haines, 04 Mar 2015
Digital Globe's 30cm satellite imagery vs. 70cm snaps

Bigfoot now visible in commercial satellite images

Last March the USA noticed a market disparity: French companies could sell higher-resolution satellite images than American companies. By June of the same year bans on US companies selling sharper space snaps were lifted. And last week the US company agitating for that change, DigitalGlobe, started to sell 30cm-resolution snaps to anyone who wants them.
Simon Sharwood, 04 Mar 2015
NGMN 5G Vision

Carriers want 5G to do everything, for anything, anywhere

MWC2015 The Next Generation Mobile Networks (NGMN) carriers' club has sorted out its ideas of what 5G's future, and set forth a blueprint of its preferred vision of a post-4G world.
Icefield
1

Bringing Hadoop in from the cold: MapR is throwing adoption barriers on the fire

Comment The pace of Hadoop development is relentless. Hortonworks recently has had its IPO. Distribution owners strive to get their version deployed faster. Alliances are forming fast. MapR is extending its own reach by adding features so the software can be adopted more easily.
Chris Mellor, 04 Mar 2015
rockstar games bully/canis canem edit
4

Australia's social media censorship law – for the children - all-but passes

The Enhancing Online Safety for Children Bill 2014 has passed Australia's Senate, meaning the nation now has a regime for compelling social networks to remove material deemed to represent bullying of children.
Simon Sharwood, 04 Mar 2015
Block diagram of the Power8 chip
1

IBM's Softlayer cloud to tout bare-metal Power8 boxes by the summer

In brief If you're dying to boot up bare-metal Power8-powered servers hosted in the cloud, today's your lucky day, and not in a I've-got-a-winning-lottery-ticket-outta-here sorta way.
Chris Williams, 04 Mar 2015

Botched NBN installs leave folks with no internet, or recourse

Australia's Telecommunications Industry Ombudsman Simon Cohen says the agency can do little to help subscribers dealing with broken National Broadband Network (NBN) installations.
Darren Pauli, 04 Mar 2015
Clouds in blue sky

Juniper, Amdocs show off vCPE at MWC

Juniper Networks has placed both feet under the Network Function Virtualisation, using Mobile World Congress as the venue to demonstrate virtual customer premises equipment (vCPE).
Picture by Afonso Lima

CONFIRMED: Tiny Windows Server is on the way

Microsoft's plans to decompose Windows Server into a far lighter and leaner beast are real. On Monday we reported on the emergence of a Microsoft slide deck outlining a “Nano” version of Windows Server aimed at the cloud.
Simon Sharwood, 04 Mar 2015

East Timor was officially removed from the internet yesterday

The country of East Timor was officially removed from the internet this week, with the '.tp' registry and all domains under it deleted from the "root zone".
Kieren McCarthy, 04 Mar 2015
Android 4.0 Ice Cream Sandwich

Google Chrome suffers brain freeze on Android Ice Cream Sandwich

Google says Chrome 42 will be the last version for phones, tabs and other things running Android 4.0 to 4.0.4, aka Ice Cream Sandwich (ICS).
Shaun Nichols, 04 Mar 2015
Baseball umpire

You're outta here! Baseball star strikes out sleazy trolls who targeted teen daughter

A former star of Major League Baseball hit a pair of alleged Twitter trolls out of the ballpark this week – by naming and shaming them on his blog, causing one to be fired and the other suspended from school.
Shaun Nichols, 04 Mar 2015
Enlighten Subway demo
2

ARM, Geomerics: Don't go to the dark side. Use the Forge, Luke

GDC 2015 Brit processor designer ARM and its gobbled subsidiary Geomerics want to shed some more light on gaming graphics – literally, with an update to Enlighten.
Shaun Nichols, 04 Mar 2015
Ama_Dablam

HGST goes on Himalaya expedition with Amplidata purchase

HGST is buying its way into object storage by acquiring Amplidata, a start-up whose technology is OEM’d by Quantum as its Lattus product and included in StorNext.
Chris Mellor, 04 Mar 2015
French fries
7

Sysadmins: Step away from the Big Mac. No more Heartbleed-style 2am patch dashes

Patching is a necessary evil for network administrators. Unfortunately, an awful lot of them have been burning not only the midnight oil, but also the weekend oil to keep up with patches such as – but not limited to – Heartbleed and Shellshock.
Stuart Burns, 04 Mar 2015
Curiosity's robotic arm probes first rock

Curiosity rover rendered armless by short circuit

Humanity's Mars-resident nuclear-powered, laser-packing space tank Curiosity has a broken arm.
Simon Sharwood, 04 Mar 2015

Reg exec in deluxe roo-skin pen case beernami trauma

We're shaken to report that El Reg big cheese Linus "Fish Fingers"* Birtles yesterday suffered a traumatic beernami which left the contents of his executive leather case "totally f@@k€d".
Lester Haines, 04 Mar 2015
Woman rides a Ford modePro electric bike

Ford to save you from BIKE FITNESS HORROR

MWC 2015 Ford is looking at electric bicycles as part of an intelligent, integrated future for mobility.
Simon Rockman, 04 Mar 2015
Flytrap
3

Outbreak! Fake Amazon voucher offer seeds mobile malware attack

Spoofed Amazon vouchers are being used to spearhead a campaign to contaminate Android mobiles with malware, messaging security firm AdaptiveMobile warns.
John Leyden, 04 Mar 2015

FREAK show: Apple and Android SSL WIDE OPEN to snoopers

Security researchers are warning of a flaw in OpenSSL and Apple's SecureTransport – a hangover from the days when the US government was twitchy about the spread of cryptography.
Iain Thomson, 03 Mar 2015
Fawlty Towers
1

Neuralytix report: Cleversafe fumes over classification

Privately object storage seller Cleversafe has got itself in a tizzy after being classified as Up and Coming in a recent Neuralytix report (seen by El Reg), based on an apparent lack of third-party integration.
Chris Mellor, 03 Mar 2015
Scary Skeleton Samba

Pull on your dancing shoes, the server market's ALLLLIVE

It looks like execs behind the biggest server-makers can dust off those dancing boots and get jiggy with it again – the market is expanding in both box shipments and the value of them.
Paul Kunert, 03 Mar 2015
Netflix House of Cards remake
4

Optus joins iiNet with free-to-download Netflix offer for Australians

Australia's second-largest ISP Optus has followed the third-largest, iiNet, by announcing Australians will be able to watch Netflix without the downloads counting towards their monthly data cap.
Unity-based game running in a browser via WebGL
5

Unity, Mozilla team up to bring PEW! PEW! PEW! to browsers, too

GDC 2015 The latest version of the Unity cross-platform game development toolkit is helping to bring advanced 3D graphics and gaming to the web, albeit in baby steps.
Neil McAllister, 03 Mar 2015
Steeden NRL ball
6

National Rugby League boots 'metadata' right into Australia's face

Australian politicians and activists frustrated at their fellows' apparent indifference to the metadata data retention debate have cause to thank the National Rugby League (NRL).
HP cloud

HP adds Eucalyptus to Helion cloud, but OpenStack still reigns

HP has restored Amazon Web Services compatibility to its Helion cloud product line, just over a year after it dropped support in favor of focusing on a mix of OpenStack and its own, in-house technology.
Neil McAllister, 03 Mar 2015
Samsung Galaxy Note Edge

Samsung Galaxy Note Edge: A side swipe at smartphone design

Review Edge. Get used to the word. From here on in, if the scuttlebut is to be believed, several flagship Samsung devices will be available with an Edge variant.  An Edgy version of the Galaxy S6 has already been confirmed.  A what? In simple terms with a bit of extra screen that curves around the right hand edge of the device.
Alun Taylor, 03 Mar 2015
Exploded iPhone

'Fry-OS 8' iPhone BLEW UP MY PANTS wails roasted Johnson

A bloke on Long Island, New York, claims an iPhone 5C exploded in his pants, putting him in hospital for 10 days with second and third-degree burns.
Iain Thomson, 03 Mar 2015
Bill Gates

He can't give it away FAST ENOUGH: Bill Gates richest man in world again

Despite Bill Gates' best efforts to offload his massive pile of cash, it seems there's literally nothing the Microsoft founder can do to avoid being the richest man in the world.
Kat Hall, 03 Mar 2015
David Petraeus and Paula Broadwell

The spy who leaked me: Ex-CIA boss Petraeus 'fesses up to blabbing intel to his mistress

The US Department of Justice has reached a settlement with General David Petraeus allowing the former military leader and ex-head of the CIA to avoid prison for handing over classified information to his lover.
Iain Thomson, 03 Mar 2015
Apple phone payement.

Apple Pay a haven for 'rampant' credit card fraud, say experts

Apple and its banker pals may have inadvertently lowered the barrier to credit card fraud by adding pay-by-wave technology to iPhones, security experts fear.
John Leyden, 03 Mar 2015
Edward Snowden's asylum documents. Source: RT

Snowden 'ready to return to US', claims lawyer

NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden is ready to return home to the US, according to his Russian lawyer.
John Leyden, 03 Mar 2015

Europe's digital chief wants China's help on standardising 5G

MWC 2015 Europe’s digi Commissioner Gunther H-dot Oettinger wants China’s help in deploying 5G.
Jennifer Baker, 03 Mar 2015
Sandisk_Infiniflascard
5

To InfiniFlash and beyond: SanDisk wheels out Big Data box

SanDisk has announced its InfiniFlash all-flash array for Big Data, a 3U box holding up to 512TB of data, 10 times more than the ION Accelerator appliance, and capable of running the same software stack – or Ceph.
Chris Mellor, 03 Mar 2015
management regulation1
9

Belgium will drag Facebook to court if it has to – privacy minister

Belgium’s privacy tsar says he is ready to hand the Facebook case to prosecutors if consultations with the social network over alleged EU law breaches fail.
Jennifer Baker, 03 Mar 2015

EU: Competition Commissioner met Google chief Schmidt

The European Commission is remaining tight-lipped about what was said in a meeting yesterday between Google supremo Eric Schmidt and Competition Commissioner Margrethe Vestager.
Jennifer Baker, 03 Mar 2015
Photo of the White House at dusk

Hillary Clinton draws flak for using personal email at State Dept

Hillary Clinton allegedly used a private email account while presiding over the State Department, potentially violating US federal record-keeping laws in the process.
John Leyden, 03 Mar 2015
Riot police in London. Pic: Steve Jackson

The BBC wants to slap a TAX on EVERYONE in BLIGHTY

The BBC could resurrect Margaret Thatcher's hated Poll Tax as well as turning itself into a technology giant to fend off "colonising" American media outfits, BBC director general Tony Hall has said.
Kat Hall, 03 Mar 2015
HP cloud

Telefonica seals deal with HP's 'carrier grade' OpenStack phone cloud

MWC 2015 Telefonica will roll out software-defined network and cloud services using an x86 system from Hewlett-Packard.
Gavin Clarke, 03 Mar 2015
Glorious future of China
6

Huawei preps to drop mobile & wearables lovebombs on U.S.

Chinese comms kit giant Huawei plans to try to woo American consumers in a marketing blitz promoting its mobes and wearables in the US – a country where it has failed to expand thanks to national security concerns expressed by the White House.
Kelly Fiveash, 03 Mar 2015

Pebble Time Steel ready in May. Plus: Now you can strap on sensors, GPS ... Geiger counter

MWC 2015 Pebble is opening up its eponymous smartwatch to third-party hardware makers. They’ll be able to build straps or other attachments that that can provide a range of additional functionality to a Pebble – such as specialist sensors for fitness or medical tasks – or just additional power.
Andrew Orlowski, 03 Mar 2015
Slow downloads

Nokia boss smashes net neutrality activists

MWC 2015 Nokia's CEO has ridiculed the idea of a one-speed “neutral” internet, arguing that some IP packets are simply more important than others.
Andrew Orlowski, 03 Mar 2015

Microsoft to Android OEMs: 'Show me the money'

Exclusive Microsoft has reserved the right to nail firms making Android devices running its Office suit for possible Windows patent infringements.
Gavin Clarke, 03 Mar 2015
3

End in sight for Google, Apple, Intel and Adobe wage-fixing lawsuit

An end to the four-year legal battle against Google, Apple, Intel and Adobe for alleged wage-fixing is in sight, with a judge having set a final hearing date for the proposed $415m (£270m) settlement.
Kat Hall, 03 Mar 2015
BlackBerry Leap smartphone

BlackBerry gets flirty with QWERTY IP, launches $275 Leap

MWC 2015 BlackBerry's CEO told The Register today that everything in the company’s IP portfolio is up for grabs, including hardware IP for BlackBerry’s hallmark QWERTY keyboards.
Andrew Orlowski, 03 Mar 2015

SanDisk launches 200GB microSD card

MWC 2015 The new SanDisk 200GB microSD card costs $399, making it more valuable weight-for-weight than blue sapphire.
Simon Rockman, 03 Mar 2015
Borg
1

Internet of Things? Pah! Biz bods, you're wasting your money

Mobile operators could be pissing away $46bn in their excitement over the Internet of Things and wearables.
Simon Rockman, 03 Mar 2015
First look at Windows 10 Universal App Platform

Microsoft opens kimono on Windows 10 Universal App Platform

MWC 2015 Microsoft's Windows 10 Universal App Platform has been explained in detail for the first time, at a developer event in Barcelona as part of Mobile World Congress.
Tim Anderson, 03 Mar 2015
Vivaldi

Sick of Chrome vs Firefox? Check out these 3 NEW browsers

Browsers have been making a comeback. There have been three brand new browsers released and even Firefox, which seems to be sliding further into irrelevancy every day, has released a new version aimed at developers and claims to be working on a WebKit-based version for iOS devices.
Prototype Vulkan debugger from Valve and LunarG

Here comes Vulkan: The next generation of the OpenGL graphics API

GDC 2015 The Khronos Group, non-profit custodian of the OpenGL cross-platform graphics API, has announced its replacement, called Vulkan.
Tim Anderson, 03 Mar 2015
Ebola virus virion
3

How a HPC array helps humanity destroy the Ebola virus

Comment Deadly diseases like Ebola are frightening. They kill people in horrible ways and destroy the host communities’ ability to fight the spread of the virus. Agencies fighting the outbreak have had to understand where the outbreak is spreading, where communities in its path are most vulnerable and where to focus their treatment and containment efforts to ring-fence the affected areas.
Chris Mellor, 03 Mar 2015

Marlinspike brings end-to-end crypto texts to iOS

Privacy bods can snub Cupertino's iMessage and instead encrypt their Apple iTexts using Moxie Marlinspike's Signal 2.0, released for iOS today.
Darren Pauli, 03 Mar 2015
Joe Tucci and Pat Gelsinger
3

Here's what keeps VMware CEO Pat Gelsinger awake at night

VMware has released its Form 10-K, the annual report in which entities listed in the USA are required to offer a warts-and-all account of all the things that could possibly go wrong.
Simon Sharwood, 03 Mar 2015
Oracle frankenstein
1

Oracle finds a port in the SDN/NFV storm with two new ethernet switches

Who said Ethernet was dull? Oracle certainly doesn't: it's floated a couple of switches down the slipway and off into the oceans of the data centre.

Atomic keyring's eerie blue glow lights SPB lab

The news last week that El Reg merchandising tentacle Cash'n'Carrion had sourced new tritium-powered glowrings prompted some atomic-powered nostalgia from those readers who'd bought the original Traser.
Lester Haines, 03 Mar 2015

EasyGroup continues bizarre, time-travelling domain crusade

easyGroup is at it again. Despite having been told repeatedly that it does not own everything that includes the word "easy," the budget company took the owner of the domain 'easygroup.com' to the World Intellectual Property Organization (WIPO) arguing that it violated its trademark.
Kieren McCarthy, 03 Mar 2015
5

Google's broadband-in-the-sky goes TITAN-ic

After a couple of years of selective reveals to favoured media, Google has made an uncharacteristic to-all-comers announcement about its broadband plans at Mobile World Congress in Barcelona.
Waves and particles (original resolution)

Is light a wave or a particle? Beaming boffins prove it's BOTH

The old conundrum is right: not only is light both a wave and a particle, but Swiss boffins have captured it behaving as both at the same time.
management regulation2

IBM sued for talking up semiconductor business it couldn't give away

A US public pension fund has filed a class-action lawsuit against IBM, claiming the company misrepresented the value of the semiconductor business it offloaded to GlobalFoundries in October.
Neil McAllister, 03 Mar 2015
Citrix X1 mouse
1

Citrix reveals next-gen Receiver and StoreFront, then buries them

Citrix has revealed, and then hidden, previews of a new version of its Receiver and Store Front applications.
Simon Sharwood, 03 Mar 2015

Forget 1,000 lashes for Facebook posts, Saudis now want to behead blogger Raif Badawi

Saudi blogger Raif Badawi – sentenced to ten years in prison and 1,000 lashes for announcing he is an atheist on Facebook – may now be beheaded by his government.
Iain Thomson, 03 Mar 2015
5

50 shades of grey can turn Adobe Reader into a hot mess

Hackers can duck antivirus programs and execute malware in Adobe Reader by using greyscale images, says Danish security boffin Dénes Óvári.
Darren Pauli, 03 Mar 2015
management regulation2
3

ACCC slaps iiNet over prices in ads

Second-tier telco and major ISP iiNet has forked over AU$204,000 to settle infringement notices from the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission.
Tinder screenshots

Tinder Plus charges oldies MORE to ogle young hotties' pics

Hookup app Tinder has launched a premium service charging older users more dosh to mingle with potential mates still in their prime.
Shaun Nichols, 03 Mar 2015

Brocade's pen poised over cheque to buy Connectem

Brocade is putting its foot into the mobile infrastructure hokey-pokey dance, announcing that it wants to buy Connectem, a specialist in virtual Evolved Packet Core (vEPC) software.
DSS 35 deep space telescope

NASA upgrades Rosetta, Voyager and moon landing tracker

NASA has upgraded the Australian facility housing antennae that captured signals from the first Moon landing and still helps to track the Voyager missions.
Simon Sharwood, 03 Mar 2015

90% of mobile data eaten by TINY, GREEDY super-user HOTSPOTS

+Comment Usage of mobile data is extremely unevenly distributed. This is the conclusion of a report by the Location Intelligence business unit of a major communications equipment company.
Simon Rockman, 03 Mar 2015
IBM Dynamic Buy

IBM continues fanboi courtship with fresh crop of iOS apps

IBM has released a trio of enterprise applications for iOS devices, as part of its Businesslab partnership with Apple.
Shaun Nichols, 03 Mar 2015

$250K: That's what Lenovo earned to RAT YOU OUT with Superfish

Lenovo bagged a paltry US$250,000 from the deal that saw it install the Superfish certificate slurper onto PCs, according to reports.
Darren Pauli, 03 Mar 2015
Minority Report. Source: Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
5

Cisco offers carriers adware-as-a-service for fun and profit

MWC 2015 Cisco has clouded up a new way to snoop on mobile users “combine network, user, and business intelligence … to realise business outcomes.”
Cloud security

Xen bug latest: Cloudpocalypse averted, says Amazon

Amazon Web Services now says that despite the recent security vulnerabilities discovered in the Xen hypervisor, the vast majority of its Elastic Compute Cloud (EC2) customers won't need to reboot their virtual machine instances after all.
Neil McAllister, 02 Mar 2015
xperia m4

Chasing pennies, Sony, Microsoft and smartphone biz rivals retreat to mid-range

MWC 2015 Before you read this, or any phone news at all this week, keep in mind one statistic. According to Strategy Analytics, for every Great British pound of profit made in the entire smartphone industry, Apple pocketed 89 pence. Everyone else is left with 11.7 pence. Everyone. In an industry that generates $300bn in wholesale revenue, everyone except Apple is scrambling for those few pennies.
Andrew Orlowski, 02 Mar 2015
Android 5.0 "Lollipop"

Google's 'encrypted-by-default' Android is NOT encrypting by default

Updated Last year, Google said Android 5, codenamed Lollipop, will encrypt the contents of smartphones and tablets by default. Now it's had to do some backtracking.
Iain Thomson, 02 Mar 2015
Double Facepalm; when one facepalm is not enough.
5

ICANN switches off dot-word admin portal amid security leak scare

Global domain-name overlord ICANN has found another security hole in its systems.
Kieren McCarthy, 02 Mar 2015
Malcolm Turnbull
3

Turnbull's Digital Transformation Office already missing deadlines

On January 23rd, Australia's prime minister Tony Abbott and communications minister Malcolm Turnbull announced a Digital Transformation Office (DTO) modelled on the UK's Government Digital Service (GDS) and charged with taking government services online.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
Netflix House of Cards remake

March 24th: The day most Australian download allowances become inadequate

Netflix has named the day on which its Australian (and New Zealand) service will commence: March 24th, 2015.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015

Twitter probes terror threat: Medieval murder mob ISIS allegedly puts co-founder in crosshairs

Twitter says it is investigating menacing threats made against its employees allegedly by deranged terror bastards ISIS (or IS, or ISIL, or whatever.)
Shaun Nichols, 02 Mar 2015
SpaceX launches electric satellites into orbit

SpaceX lofts two all-electric ion-drive comsats to Clarke orbit

Pics Another month, another successful SpaceX launch. This time, a Falcon 9 sent into orbit a twin set of communications satellites that eschew chemical-engine propellant in favor of solar power.
Iain Thomson, 02 Mar 2015

US court rubber-stamps dragnet metadata surveillance (again)

A US federal court has rubber stamped approval for the NSA to carry on with its controversial dragnet collection of Americans' phone records.
John Leyden, 02 Mar 2015

Insight: Have you heard about Windows Server 2003 support?

As organisations using Windows Server 2003 march - perhaps with ill-found confidence - toward the expiry date for Microsoft support, Insight Enterprises has scare stories galore warnings for them.
Paul Kunert, 02 Mar 2015
Groovy programming language

Groovy Java guy off for Restlet

Guillaume Laforge, leader of the Groovy project, is joining Restlet, a small company which supports the open source Restlet framework.
Tim Anderson, 02 Mar 2015
Flash_IOPS_and_latency_as_load_changes
9

HDS blogger names HDS flash array as latency winner

Flash array response times climb as load increases, with good ones able to delay the response time uptick for longer.
Chris Mellor, 02 Mar 2015
French fries
9

NXP snaps up Freescale to form new chipzilla

Dutch chip company NXP has snapped up US rival Freescale Semiconductor for $11.8bn (£7.7bn).
Kat Hall, 02 Mar 2015
Sailfish OS

Jolla launches Sailfish 2.0, now with added security

MWC 2015 Jolla, the smouldering platform which was born out of Nokia’s decision to go Microsoft, has announced its new version of the Sailfish OS.
Simon Rockman, 02 Mar 2015
Sundar Pichai
8

Google dips toe into U.S. mobile market with 'small scale' offering

MWC 2015 Google confirmed on Monday that it plans to enter the wireless carrier market Stateside within the "coming months".
Kelly Fiveash, 02 Mar 2015
HP

HP gulps down Aruba Networks for $3bn

After a period of abstinence from mega buys, HP has dipped into its cash reserves to find $3bn (£2bn) for wireless infrastructure biz Aruba Networks.
Kat Hall, 02 Mar 2015
silent circle
5

Silent Circle revamps secure smartphone

MWC 2015 Silent Circle ‪has lifted the lid of the Blackphone‬ 2 smartphone and ‪Blackphone‬+ tablet.
John Leyden, 02 Mar 2015
Pwned
8

ASML‬ plays down mystery hack attack

‪Semiconductor supplier ASML‬ has admitted that unnamed hackers broke into its systems.
John Leyden, 02 Mar 2015
IBM Headquarters, Armonk, NY
8

High Court: IBM staff refused pay increases can claim damages

IBM employees who were refused salary increases because they would not agree to changes to the company's pension scheme are entitled to claim damages, the High Court has ruled.
Kat Hall, 02 Mar 2015

First peek at the next Ubuntu 15.04 nester line-up

Ubuntu 15.04 is here – almost. The first beta of Vivid Vervet has been delivered, and with it have come images of the penguin flock that nestles on this OS.

Coms CEO: Sorry about accidentally buying 20k shares, I'm off

The chief of Coms Plc appeared to be close to the exit following his public spat with the rest of the board last week. Sure enough, the company today confirmed he’s stepped down.
Paul Kunert, 02 Mar 2015
6

Ericsson, Telstra and Qualcomm up the ante with 600Mbps demo

MWC 2015 Qualcomm, Ericsson and Telstra are set to demonstrate a new tri-carrier LTE-A solution capable of delivering 600Mbps over mobile at this week's Mobile World Congress.
Simon Rockman, 02 Mar 2015
BlackBerry Classic QWERTY key smartphone

Have it all: BlackBerry to port crown jewels to iPhone, Android

MWC 2015 At Mobile World Congress, BlackBerry said it will port key client platform features – like its soft keyboard, Universal Search and Hub – to iPhone and Android, and also throw them into its enterprise software bundles.
Andrew Orlowski, 02 Mar 2015

Would you trust 'spyproof' mobes made in Putin's Russia?

A Russian firm is developing its own anti-surveillance enterprise smartphone prototype - the TaigaPhone.
John Leyden, 02 Mar 2015

3 spectastic Lumias for price of 1 rival flagship: Microsoft sells biz on cheapie experience

MWC 2015 Former Nokia CEO Stephen Elop emerged from cryogenic storage at Microsoft to announce two new phones and give a glimpse of mobile Office for Windows 10. But not a lot – more will be revealed at Microsoft’s developer event, Build, in April.
Andrew Orlowski, 02 Mar 2015
Generic mast

Network vendors need something far more real than ‘5G’

MWC 2015 The big infrastructure vendors all made significant announcements in advance of Mobile World Congress, holding their beauty parades before the distractions of the event itself. While there was a lot of the inevitable "5G" vision-making on show, the main focus was on something more real: new platforms which could be deployed in a one-to-two-year rather than a five-year timeframe.
Wireless Watch, 02 Mar 2015
Bradley Horowitz. Image credit: Google

Bradley Horowitz on ailing Google+: Islands in the stream, that is what we are ...

Google product veep Bradley Horowitz is now heading up the ad giant's fading fast Google+ service, but its name appears to have put the willies up Mountain View's execs lately – to the point where they simply don't mention it any more.
Kelly Fiveash, 02 Mar 2015
chain_relationship_channel

HP Services engineer dispatch tool 'broken', say engineers

An automated service call system pilot at HP – which we are told cost $72m to develop – is fundamentally flawed because it often relies on patchy web connectivity, engineers are complaining.
Paul Kunert, 02 Mar 2015
Tangle of cables attached to a telegraph pole
1

VMware makes NFV telco play by snuggling up to OpenStack

MWC 2015 VMware has clambered aboard the network function virtualisation (NFV) bandwagon with “vCloud for NFV” - and has announced that Vodafone has been in production with the software for a while.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
WD_MyCloud_EX4100

WD reveals NASty new boxes for home and small biz use

WD has updated its My Cloud NAS products, adding more oomph for prosumers and two boxes for small-business-filing fanatic users.
Chris Mellor, 02 Mar 2015
Car-2-Car

The car in front has Kaspersky deep inside

Kaspersky Lab is taking anti-virus in a different direction by embedding it in SCADA-based industrial control systems, components of the Internet of Things, and yep, even cars.
John Leyden, 02 Mar 2015
Hitachi mining shovel and rigid dumptruck

HDS makes its move beyond storage with telco data analyser

MWC 2015 Hitachi Data Systems (HDS) has taken big step away from storage by releasing a realtime telco traffic monitor.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
Zombie rising from the grave

Windows XP's market share grows AGAIN!

It's the first Monday of the month, so time for us to have a look at desktop operating system market share again!
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
9

Just want a simple, low-power GPU for your smart-gumble? Try using your Imagination

MWC 2015 Getting tired of chip designers bragging how their latest and greatest GPUs are stuffed full of transistors and can process a bazillion polygons a second? Well, Imagination has an antidote – the PowerVR G6020, which is aimed at smartwatches and embedded stuff where a slick 2D user interface is preferred over 3D might.
Chris Williams, 02 Mar 2015

Tulsa woman bludgeons man mercilessly with laptop

This is not a good way to come out of deep sleep. A US man was awoken from his drunken stupor by the pain of his girlfriend sinking her fangs into his gentleman’s sausage and bludgeoning him with her laptop.
Paul Kunert, 02 Mar 2015
4

Twitter triples abuse team, knocks dox

Twitter has tripled the size of its abuse support team after the number of reports it handled increased five-fold in six months thanks to an expansion of harassment controls.
Darren Pauli, 02 Mar 2015

US military SATELLITE suddenly BLOWS UP: 'Temperature spike' blamed

In a story reminiscent of the movie Gravity, near-Earth orbits have a bunch of new space junk chunks to worry about after a satellite exploded.

Bad movie: Hackers can raid networks with burnt Blu-Rays

British hacker Stephen Tomkinson has found two Blu-Ray-borne attacks.
Darren Pauli, 02 Mar 2015
One Windows: Windows 10 will be delivered on multiple device types

Microsoft working on 'Nano' version of Windows Server for web-scale ops

Microsoft appears to be working on a new version of Windows Server aimed at web-scale operations.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
Clouds in blue sky

Citrix targets carriers with NetScaler

MWC 2015 Citrix is taking a leap into carrier-grade network function virtualisation (NFV) with a new release of its NetScaler platform.
Kim Dotcom

It's a Mega blast: PayPal drops Dotcom's Mega

PayPal has pulled support for Kim Dotcom's Mega.
Darren Pauli, 02 Mar 2015
Microsoft-themed Monopoly board
6

Microsoft Swarms all over Docker Machines

Microsoft has expanded its cloudy support for Docker, adding Docker Machine to Azure and Hyper-V, and supporting Docker Swarm.

Blockheads bork Bitcoin Foundation board election

Those with doubts about Bitcoin's viability have some new ammunition, after the Bitcoin Foundation fluffed a board election it tried to run using its own technology.
Simon Sharwood, 02 Mar 2015
Cellular basestation antenna

Telstra takes lead in 5G, just like everybody else

Australia's dominant carrier, Telstra, has joined World+Dog in promising to take the lead in the 5G race, with a roadmap that reaches all the way to next year.
fire damaged hard disk drive

Seagate NAS owners: hide it behind a firewall. Fast.

An Australian security researcher says a bunch of Seagate NAS devices carry serious vulnerabilities and should be kept away from the Internet.
6

BitDefender bit trip slaps 'valid' on revoked certs

Bitdefender is set to fix a security flaw in its products that meant revoked certificates for potentially malicious sites could be replaced with legitimate ones.
Darren Pauli, 01 Mar 2015
Planet Labs' Doves in their coop
9

Satellite cannon starts shooting Doves, this time under control

The nano-sat launcher aboard the International Space Station has stopped malfunctioning and started spitting its payload into space as intended.
Parliament House Canberra by Flickr user OzMark17 used under CC Share and Share alike licence
4

Turnbull's model e-gov service is HIPSTER SHAMBLES

Australia's communications minister Malcolm Turnbull has often expressed his admiration for the United Kingdom's Government Digital Service (GDS), going so far to say as to say it is the model and/or inspiration for the recently-revealed Digital Transformation Office (DTO).
Simon Sharwood, 01 Mar 2015
Galaxy S6

Phabba-dabba-do: Samsung hypes up Galaxy S6 and S6 Edge

MWC 2015 The grandeur of today's Samsung S6 phabgasm in Barcelona reminded your correspondent of the scene in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy when the day dawned for the announcement of the Answer (to life the universe and everything).
Simon Rockman, 01 Mar 2015
HTC and Valve's Vive

In Barcelona, no one can hear you scream ... HTC, Valve unleash Giger-inspired VR headgear

MWC 2015 HTC has followed in the footsteps of Facebook-owned Oculus and Microsoft with its own VR headset.
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Mar 2015
Spacewalking outside the ISS. Image credit: NASA TV

NASA 'nauts complete another EPIC SPACEWALK to route cables around ISS

Astronauts working on NASA's International Space Station have snaked yet more cabling around the orbiting science lab.
Kelly Fiveash, 01 Mar 2015

Out of time: Huawei, LG unveil watches nobody wants to buy

MWC 2015 China’s Huawei and South Korea’s LG showed off new watches in Barcelona today. The “smartwatch” is a misnomer: both will stop telling the time after a day, unless they are charged. Then they can tell you the time for another day.
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Mar 2015

HTC One M9 hands on: Like a smart M8 in a sharp suit

MWC 2015 HTC's One is like a tasteful band that has been the critics' choice for years but never quite breaks through from cult status to superstardom. It's by far the classiest thing on the market – but its distinctiveness and craftmanship hasn't been rewarded by runaway success.
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Mar 2015

BOOM! MediaTek parks tanks on Qualcomm's lawn

MWC 2015 This time last year MediaTek was still smarting about sniffy comments made by Qualcomm. "You can’t take eight lawnmower engines, put them together and now claim you have an eight-cylinder Ferrari," Qualcomm's senior VP Anand Chandrasekher had said, referring to MediaTek’s 610 and 615 eight core smartphone chips.
Andrew Orlowski, 01 Mar 2015
wankband

W*nkers of the world unite to SAVE THE PLANET one jerk-off at a time

A standout smut peddler wants its customers to take a shot at saving the planet with a kinetic power generator, tastefully dubbed the Wankband, which uses the wrist action favoured by onanists.
Iain Thomson, 01 Mar 2015
7

Watch out hipster nerds – Granny Beskind's behind you!

In a push back against the twenty-something, misogynistic Silicon Valley culture – along comes nonagenarian Barbara Beskind.
Kieren McCarthy, 01 Mar 2015
Acer M220 Windows Phone

Acer enters Windows Phone fray with cheap Liquid M220 mobe

MWC 2015 Acer is entering the Windows Phone market, with a low-end model that will retail for just €79, making it the cheapest mobile in the vendor’s range.
Tim Anderson, 01 Mar 2015
Hadoop_elephant
1

Hadoop gets native C/C++ injection

Like Hadoop but it’s just a bit too Javary? There’s now an answer for that: MapReduce for C (MR4C).
Gavin Clarke, 01 Mar 2015
Panasonic TH-103PZ600

Telly behemoths: Does size matter?

Feature This month, the fabulously wealthy owners of houses with curved walls will be delighted to know that the world's largest curved TV arrives at the Knightsbridge tat-palace Harrods. With a 105-inch screen, LG's new set, the snappily named 105UC9V boasts a 21:9 aspect ratio, and all the latest technology.
Nigel Whitfield, 01 Mar 2015
Raphael's School of Athens

C'mon! Greece isn't really bust and it can pay its debts

Worstall @ the Weekend As I write we've just got the latest news that Greece has been saved from default, bankruptcy, being thrown out of the euro and everything is going to be lovely for The Men Without Ties. Which is, of course, lovely, but there really wasn't quite as much to worry about as people seemed to think.
Tim Worstall, 01 Mar 2015
Power lines

Ikea to start making electrified furniture. What could possibly go wrong?

MWC Ikea, having successfully branded Sweden as a country associated with family disputes and cupboards with wonky doors, has now taken on the challenge of improving how we all live through Qi wireless charging technology.
Simon Rockman, 01 Mar 2015
Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott

Tony Abbott says food importers deserve help denied to telcos

Australia's government decided this week to impose two major new regulations on business.
Simon Sharwood, 28 Feb 2015
Tim Cook

Tim Cook chills the spines of swingers worldwide

Apple boss Tim Cook has claimed that Cupertino's Watch, which will be wheeled out on 9 March, will replace car keys.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Feb 2015
Google UK roof terrace
6

Blurred vision: Google dreams of a campus mixing buildings with nature

Google has submitted plans to redevelop four sites at its headquarters in Mountain View, California.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Feb 2015
Grad James Stevenson, astronomer Jonathan Lunine and chemical engineer Paulette Clancy, with a Cassini image of Titan in the foreground of Saturn, and an azotosome, the theorised cell membrane on Titan. Credit: Cornell University

BOFFINS: Oxygen-free, methane-based ALIENS may EXIST on icy SATURN moon Titan

Scientists believe they have come up with a solid model for a new type of methane-based, oxygen-free life form that could thrive in the harsh, icy conditions of Saturn's mysterious freezing moon, Titan.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Feb 2015
Hyperloop plans

Elon Musk plans to plonk urban Hyperloop subsonic tube on California

Billionaire space baron Elon Musk has inked a deal with land developers in California to allow his company to begin installing an over-hyped, loopy new transport system appropriately dubbed Hyperloop.
Kelly Fiveash, 28 Feb 2015
Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds movie still

At night, scary wildlife comes out to play in the chemical factory

On-call Welcome to On-Call, our semi-regular-ish weekend feature in which readers share experiences that happened late at night, in odd places.
Simon Sharwood, 28 Feb 2015
Apple iPhone 6 and 6 Plus

MEGA PATENT DUMP! Ericsson, Smartflash blitz Apple: iPhone, iPad menaced by sales block

Linkfest Emboldened by its $533m patent-infringement win against Apple just a few days ago, Smartflash is suing the iPhone maker AGAIN – and Ericsson is joining the fray.
Shaun Nichols, 28 Feb 2015
Bang by Guian Bolisay

'The troll stats saddened me as a human, but didn't surprise me as a boffin'

QuoTW This week, we saved the internet, screwed up our smart TVs and made absolutely no money from our YouTube accounts. In the process, we uttered some memorable lines.
Team Register, 28 Feb 2015
The Nether

Murky online paedo retreat: The Nether explores the fantasy-reality divide

Theatre Review On a bare stage, two chairs face each other across a table. At the table sits Morris, an investigating detective employed by The Nether – the virtual counterpart to the In-World – where users in the year 2050 can live out their every fantasy. Opposite sits her quarry, Sims, a businessman in his 60s who has been up to no good. His crime: he has created a virtual space, or “realm”, that breaks the rules.
Steve Caplin, 28 Feb 2015
Shamed book cover
3

So You've Been Publicly Shamed, Style and The Buried Giant

Page File El Reg bookworm Mark Diston leafs his way through three forthcoming releases. Remains of the Day author Kazuo Ishiguro's first book in a decade takes us on a mythical journey. Jon Ronson engages in a journey of his own having been victim of a social networking stunt. And Joseph Connolly entertains with his tale of guilty pleasures and domestic obsessions.
Mark Diston, 28 Feb 2015
Sad cloud
8

EU governments are CRAP at cloud, moans Brussels' infosec watchdog

European governments haven’t got a clue how to implement cloud services. So say the EU's own cybersecurity experts.
Jennifer Baker, 28 Feb 2015

I, ROBOT ~ YOU, MORON. How else will automated news work?

Something for the Weekend, Sir? They want to replace me with a robot. This is an excellent idea. In a world of unlimited connected information, it’s about time that the middleman stopped getting in the way. Things happen, facts materialise, they end up online, then you read them. Simple, really. What’s a journalist for?
Alistair Dabbs, 28 Feb 2015
Github octodex

FORK ME! Uber hauls GitHub into court to find who hacked database of 50,000 drivers

Uber has subpoenaed GitHub to unmask netizens suspected of hacking its database of thousands of taxi drivers.
Kieren McCarthy, 28 Feb 2015
Panic button
5

New Xen vuln triggers Amazon, Rackspace reboot panic redux

Newly discovered vulnerabilities in the open source Xen virtualization hypervisor have once again sent major public cloud companies scurrying to patch and reboot their systems before attackers can pull off a massive exploit.
Neil McAllister, 28 Feb 2015
Icelandic chasm

FCC says cities should be free to run decent ISPs. And Republicans can't stand it

Analysis A decision by the FCC has opened up a partisan chasm by quashing US state laws that hamper the rollout of city-owned broadband.
Kieren McCarthy, 28 Feb 2015
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella

He's baaack: Microsoft's axeman Nadella to give Chinese staff the chop

More Microsoft staffers will lose their jobs next month when the software giant closes two smartphone factories in China, according to reports.
Neil McAllister, 28 Feb 2015