Articles about large hadron collider lhc

The Register breaking news

LHC boffins turn lead into quarko-gluotic Big Bang incrediblo-stuff

International boffins are vying with one another in a race to topsy-turvinate the world of physics this week, with a flurry of results due in imminently from radical fabric-of-time-and-space-rending experiments at the Large Hadron Collider - most brutally powerful particle-pummeller ever assembled by the human race. “It …
Lewis Page, 29 Nov 2010
The Register breaking news

Hadron Collider switches to heavy ions, tinfoilers wet pants again

Particle-punishing boffins at the Large Hadron Collider - the most outrageously powerful matter-rending apparatus and largest machine of any kind assembled by the human race - have switched ammunition. The colossal superconductor massdriver cannons of the LHC are now firing "fully stripped" ultrahypervelocity lead projectiles …
Lewis Page, 8 Nov 2010
The Register breaking news

Boffins riot as Hadron Collider upgrade is delayed

Budget cuts are forcing international science alliance CERN to postpone upgrades to the most potent particle-punisher currently operated by the human race - the subterranean Large Hadron Collider (LHC) outside Geneva. CERN has also been compelled to temporarily shut down other accelerators, and has seen "protests" from boffins …
Lewis Page, 20 Sep 2010
The Register breaking news

Boffin-botherer's LHC doomsday case thrown out on appeal

Eccentric botanist and soi-disant physicist Walter L Wagner of Hawaii, continuing his futile battle in the US courts against the Large Hadron Collider, has been handed another stinging legal bitchslap. Wagner's original case was thrown out in 2008, but he appealed this decision and found himself back in Hawaii's federal court …
Lewis Page, 27 Aug 2010
The Register breaking news

'Beauty with antimatter bottom' created out of pure energy

Physicists at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), the most powerful particle punisher ever assembled by the human race, say that experiments there are going well. In particular, they have managed to create out of pure energy a thing which they describe as a "beauty" featuring an antimatter bottom. LHCb Beauty particle collision …
Lewis Page, 23 Apr 2010
The Register breaking news

LHC particle-punisher in record 7 TeV hypercollisions

It's official: as this is written, the most powerful particle collisions ever achieved by the human race are taking place inside the great subterranean detector caverns of the Large Hadron Collider (LHC). An initial hiccup this morning saw an overly-jumpy automatic protection system quench a magnet and dump one of the beams, …
Lewis Page, 30 Mar 2010
The Register breaking news

Tinfoil Condition Red! LHC 7 TeV mega-blasts today

Tuesday will be a big day at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), far and away the most powerful particle-punisher ever assembled by the human race. For the first time ever, boffins operating the colossal machine will cross the streams produced in its twin mighty hadron cannons, colliding particles at never-before-seen 7 Tera- …
Lewis Page, 29 Mar 2010
The Register breaking news

'The LHC will implode the Moon or PUT OUT THE SUN'

Tinfoil Tuesday Here on the Reg Large Hadron Collider (LHC) desk, where we follow the rollercoaster triumphs and disasters which occur at the world's mightiest particle-thrasher, there are occasional quiet spells. Right now, for instance, the titanic machine is shut down for a couple of days' technical tweaks. On such days we cast about us …
Lewis Page, 16 Mar 2010
The Register breaking news

Large Hadron Collider briefly back on over weekend

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC), mightiest particle-masher ever assembled by the human race, briefly circulated its first hadron beams of 2010 at the weekend. However the vast machine has now been shut down again to remedy further technical snags. Following last week's unfortunate multi-magnet quench incident, which saw large …
Lewis Page, 1 Mar 2010
The Register breaking news

Large Hadron Collider in multi-magnet quench hiccup

A technical hiccup has delayed the planned restart of the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), the titanic subterranean magno-doughnut particle smasher situated deep beneath the Franco-Swiss border. The LHC, most outrageous matter-rending machine ever assembled by the human race, had been expected to fire up its circulating hadron …
Lewis Page, 25 Feb 2010
The Register breaking news

Large Hadron Collider to fire up again next Thursday

Exclusive The Large Hadron Collider (LHC), most powerful particle-smasher ever assembled by the human race and possible portal to other dimensions, is to fire up its beams following the Xmas break in a week's time. Official spokesmen for international particle-punishing science alliance CERN have thus far remained cagey about the exact …
Lewis Page, 18 Feb 2010

US gov's emptying of vast Texan helium-tank dome 'wrong'

A hefty sci/tech body has said that the USA's current policy of selling off its enormous reserves of helium gas - which it keeps stored in a gigantic subterranean dome reservoir in Texas - is all wrong. This is partly because the plan is cocking up the global helium market, and partly because helium is vital for many activities …
Lewis Page, 5 Feb 2010

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