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Battle for ctrl

Washed out summer? Fear ye not: DVDs for DevOps droogs

Stob Hurrah! Summer is at last well under way, so how better to pass the weekends than pulling the curtains on the rainscape, lolling on the sofa and inhaling a few dozen hours of downloaded TV? I am aware that such an introduction sets up certain expectations. However, rather than treat you to ill-informed speculation regarding …
Verity Stob, 26 Jul 2016
Poison pill

Micron sets a canary to watch over its stock in case of takeover

A filing in the Securities Exchange Commission has set the hounds running on speculation that Micron Technology is the latest takeover target in the ongoing consolidation of the chip business. The filing, in the arcane language of SEC documents, gets to the point in this statement: “[N]o person will become an Acquiring …
ClusterStor_L300_bezel_detail

Seagate's south UK factory hasn't a future but HDDs do (it hopes)

Seagate is closing down its factory in Havant on the south coast of the UK and axing 327 jobs. The redundancies are part of a renewed focus by the Californian giant on its disk drive technology roadmap to boost revenues and profitability. The Havant closure is part of the restructuring announced earlier this month, along with …
Chris Mellor, 25 Jul 2016
UK pound crashes after Brexit

Lenovo: Our gear will be 10% more pricey from 1 August

Exclusive Lenovo has confirmed the price of its hardware is going to get more expensive in the UK from the start of next month. It is the latest vendor to react to the downward swing in the value of the British pound vs the US dollar. Confirmation of the double digit price hike – seen by us – was sent to channel partners late last week …
Paul Kunert, 25 Jul 2016
phishing_648

Is digital fraud big in UK? British abacus-botherers finally have some answers

Reports of fraud have doubled, according to official statistics – because the Office for National Statistics (ONS) is now including cyber crimes in its figures. The UK's ONS reckons, in crime statistics released last week, that more than two million computer misuse offences and 3.8 million online fraud offences took place in …
John Leyden, 25 Jul 2016
The hit augmented reality smartphone app "Pokemon GO" shows a Pokemon encounter overlain on a real world trail in the forest in Santa Cruz, California. Photo by Matthew Corley for Shutterstock. EDITORIAL USE ONLY!.

I don't like Mondays, Pokemon, Twitter or Facebook – Sir Bob Geldof

RSA Asia Activist pop star Sir Bob Geldof hates Pokemon Go, Facebook and Twitter, has never bought anything online, and uses a Nokia 3100 which he says avoids the need for mobile security. Sir Geldof Sir Bob and his Nokia relic. The muso and Irish punk-now-pop icon took aim at the meaningless obsessions of the modern world during a …
Darren Pauli, 25 Jul 2016
The Funai ZV427FX4 VHS/DVD combo box

No, the VCR is not about to die. It died years ago. Now it's VHS/DVD combo boxes' turn

Japanese company Funai will stop making VHS devices this month, marking the end of the road for the venerable video tape standard. But the company has told The Register that low demand is not the reason for VHS' demise, despite being cited widely based on a brief Japanese language report. Funai told us it sold 750,000 VHS …
Simon Sharwood, 25 Jul 2016
Woman looking sceptical. photo by shutterstock

They kept that quiet. PC sales via distributors DID rise in Q2

It is a Friday and El Reg is pleased to be able to answer the burning question on the lips of readers across the land - just how did PC sales via distribution do in the second quarter? They went well. Though retailers and wholesalers bought in stock conservatively, as recorded by Gartner and IDC, channel analyst Context …
Paul Kunert, 22 Jul 2016
shutterstock_184661174

Oh dear, Vodafone: Sales dip in UK

Sales at Vodafone in the UK dropped 3.2 per cent in the first quarter of its financial year to €1.84bn (£1.5bn) - with the biz pointing to issues with its new billing system. Overall revenue dropped by 4.5 per cent to €13.37bn (£11.2bn), with sales in Europe also dipping by 3.5 per cent to €8.7bn (£7.3bn). The biz blamed its …
Kat Hall, 22 Jul 2016

Stack Overflow takes on technical documentation

Stack Overflow, a popular site for developer and IT admin problem solving, is taking on technical documentation, with support from companies including Microsoft, Paypal, Twilio and Dropbox. The Stack Overflow site was created in 2008 by Jeff Atwood and Joel Spolsky, and originally focused only on developer questions. It was …
Tim Anderson, 21 Jul 2016
brexit_crashing_pound_currency

ASUS first Asian PC maker to warn of price hikes... in 2.5 months

Exclusive ASUS has confirmed the UK list price of computers are expected to rise on average by nine per cent in the Christmas quarter due the weakening of the British pound versus the US dollar. Unlike American rivals Dell and HP Inc, the Asian PC makers have been far slower to react to currency swings, with Lenovo and Acer still unable …
Paul Kunert, 19 Jul 2016
Hadoop

Commvault stomps out with protection for Hadoop, Big Data analytics systems

Backgrounder Commvault’s Chief Communications Officer Bill Wohl was in London yesterday, and wanting to emphasise how well Commvault has recovered from the dip in its fortunes caused by customers moving to the cloud faster than anticipated. He said Commvault was, in our words, a bridge between product systems and their data and a protected …
Chris Mellor, 15 Jul 2016
Woman watches TV with cat, uses remote to change channel. Photo by Shutterstock

Ad blockers responsible for rise in upfront TV ad sales, claims report

The upfront market for broadcast and cable networks has taken an unexpected U-turn from last year’s dip, seeing an increase in advertising sales of $800m to $18.6bn in the most recent completion. According to research firm Media Dynamics, this 4.5 per cent increase in TV ad revenue is a blow to OTT video platforms on PCs and …
Faultline, 15 Jul 2016
Big pipe, photo via Shutterstock

5G: Mother of all pipes, or actually useful?

The 5G standardization timeline is set, demos and proofs of concept are proliferating, and claims to 5G world firsts are on the rise. Yet, many mobile operators and vendors don’t really know what future 5G networks will be needed for beyond better mobile broadband services, and they’re calling on potential industry users for …
VMware nutella

Virtual mirror on the wall, what will happen at VMware's ball?

VMware saves its biggest announcements of the year for its late August VMworld conference. The company of course keeps its cards close to its chest, but the content catalog for the conference generally offers some clues about what we can expect. The Register's virtualisation desk has long predicted that the current vSphere …
Simon Sharwood, 14 Jul 2016
Ben Mezrich, Once Upon a Time in Russia: The Rise of the Oligarchs and the Greatest Wealth in History

Russian gang who exploited hacked bank accounts jailed

Five members of an international money-laundering gang based in London have been jailed after cops unravelled their malware-enabled conspiracy. The gang, composed exclusively of Russian nationals, was led by a pair of men who were both named Aslan. Aslan Abazov, 30, of Cromwell Road, London SW7,was sentenced to seven years …
DJ at mixing deck. Photo by Shutterstock

IBM puts Global Tech Services staff at risk in 'skills remix'

A second round of UK redundancy consultations are set to kick off for IBMers working in the Global Business Services (GBS) division, company insiders have told us. Big Blue initiated numerous job-cutting programmes this year as it reacted to fewer big ticket outsourcing deals and the rise of cloud computing by sending more …
Paul Kunert, 13 Jul 2016
Stranded_ships

Falling PC tide strands Seagate's disk drive boats. Will WDC follow?

Comment Seagate has announced its latest quarterly results will be unexpectedly good but there will be employee bloodshed. Another 6,500 layoffs on top of the 1,600 announced in June will take place. WDC did say it was cutting 507 US staff in June but these are the tip of an expected iceberg, which will see thousands of positions …
Chris Mellor, 12 Jul 2016
The British Pound - Sterling currency tumbles post Brexit

HP Inc: Double-digit bounce due on PC prices next month

HP Inc has blamed the wobbliness of the British pound for a double-digit price hike in the UK due to kick in from the start of next month on all its commercial PC kit – but for some reason the print range is to avoid the upward swing. Sterling has slumped to a 31-year low following the outcome of the EU referendum and some …
Paul Kunert, 11 Jul 2016

Kotkin on who made Trump and Brexit: Look in the mirror, it's you

Interview Two American writers have attempted to grapple with the rise of “populism” exemplified by Donald Trump and Brexit, with both starting (if not finishing) from the Left. Both Death of the Liberal Class by Chris Hedges and The New Class Conflict by Joel Kotkin both make uncomfortable reading for the complacent chatterati. Both …
Andrew Orlowski, 11 Jul 2016
Kevin Turner

Farewell to Microsoft's Sun Tzu: Thanks for all the cheese, Kevin Turner

Kevin Turner’s departure as Microsoft’s chief salesman after 11 years marks the final passing of the Redmond old guard. Chief operating officer Turner - KT, as he was known - was a chief of the old-school corporate kind; sales, marketing and Microsoft’s stores all reported into Turner. His departure is part of a massive sales …
Gavin Clarke, 08 Jul 2016
Double pizza, image via Shutterstock

Rise up! Rise up! Rise up to the OpenPOWER Developer Challenge

Promo IBM has created a virtual hackathon for all you lovely developers to test drive your data-intensive applications on the OpenPOWER server, GPU and accelerator platform. And there’s $27,000 worth of prizes on the table. Want to give it a go? Check out the competition rules and register for the OpenPOWER Developer Challenge. The …
David Gordon, 08 Jul 2016

Gartner: Brexit cluster-fsck has ballsed up our spending forecast

Tech spending forecasters at Gartner are all in a tizzy – Brexit and currency fluctuations are both to blame. At the start of this year, the crystal ball stroker estimated the industry would grow 0.5 per cent in 2016, then flip flopped and reduced this prediction by a full percentage point to $3.49 trillion, blaming the …
Paul Kunert, 07 Jul 2016

The Great Brain Scan Scandal: It isn’t just boffins who should be ashamed

Special Report If the fMRI brain-scanning fad is well and truly over, then many fashionable intellectual ideas look like collateral damage, too. What might generously be called the “British intelligentsia” – our chattering classes – fell particularly hard for the promise that “new discoveries in brain science” had revealed a new …
Andrew Orlowski, 07 Jul 2016
pic from imperial colllege study

Behold the ROBOT RECTUM... medics' relief

Rise of the machines: Spare a thought for the only Rectal Teaching Assistant in the UK who has lost his livelihood to a cold, metal bastard. A bionic booty, comprised of prosthetic buttocks and anus with in-built robotic tech was developed by the white coats at Imperial College London to help doctors and nurses practise …
Katyanna Quach, 06 Jul 2016
Brexit financial crash

Dell confirms price rise post Brexit vote as UK pound stumbles

Dell has blamed a Brexit-induced sterling meltdown for a double-digit price hike across its portfolio in the UK. As we revealed last week, the British pound has weakened to a 31-year low against the US dollar, making price rises inevitable. Today’s rate is 12.4 per cent lower than before the EU referendum. Channel partners …
Paul Kunert, 05 Jul 2016

Wealthy youngsters more likely to be freetards than anyone else – study

The well-groomed throng of bourgeois protesters that shunned the weekly Waitrose shop and headed for London’s Parliament Square on Saturday had something in common other than a common desire to remain in the EU. The demographic that closely mirrors keen Remain voters is more likely to download content illegally than any other UK …
Andrew Orlowski, 05 Jul 2016
Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg, speaking at the 2015 F8 conference

Israel's security minister suckers Zucker for Facebook'ed killings

Israel's Public Security Minister Gilad Erdan has blamed Facebook founder Mark Zukerberg for the killing of Hallel Ariel and Michael Marks. The Minister told local program Meet the Press Facebook does not do enough to alert security forces to terrorist-related posts after Ariel's killer Muhammad Tarari posted to the social …
Darren Pauli, 05 Jul 2016

Crown Commercial Services is to slap SMEs with price hikes

Government procurement body the Crown Commercial Service is to start hiking up the amount it charges suppliers to sell stuff to the public sector. CCS already pockets fees from government frameworks – last year taking a cut of £72m from the £15bn total managed spend it facilitated. However, it will now more heavily rely on …
Kat Hall, 04 Jul 2016
The British Pound - Sterling currency tumbles post Brexit

Sterling's post-Brexit dollar woes are forcing up tech kit prices

Tech vendors don’t want to admit it but CIOs will need to return to their spending plan spreadsheets: hardware is going to get more expensive post-Brexit as sterling slides against the US dollar. The UK currency fell 12 per cent on 24 June when the outcome of the EU referendum emerged, and this week the pound plunged to a 31 …
Paul Kunert, 01 Jul 2016
Lawyer up

Broker DP Data shuts up shop after HP's lawyers took a bite out of them

Grey broker DP Data Systems is facing a trademark infringement case brought by Hewlett Packard that ultimately convinced management to pull down the shutters, the business has claimed in its latest financial filing. As exclusively revealed by El Reg, the Manchester based wholesaler of HP, Cisco, IBM, Juniper and Lenovo shut up …
Paul Kunert, 30 Jun 2016
ETA telco cable contest winners

Loop Dreams: Top college talents showcase their skills … in cabling

Students from around the US gathered recently in Louisville, Kentucky to take part in a series of contests based on installing, maintaining, and troubleshooting lines for telco networks. The SkillsUSA Telecommunications Cabling Championship brought high school and university students together to compete in events including 25- …
Shaun Nichols, 30 Jun 2016
Ben Mezrich, Once Upon a Time in Russia: The Rise of the Oligarchs and the Greatest Wealth in History

Kremlin hackers and the Democratic National Committee: How deep is the rabbit-hole?

Well publicised attacks against the US Democrat National Committee exposed earlier this month are part of a wider pattern of attacks against a much broader range of US political targets, according to new research by Dell SecureWorks. The same group of cyber-spies is predominantly spying on Russia and neighbouring countries but …
John Leyden, 29 Jun 2016
Digital feet, photo via Shutterstock

Body of evidence: Biometrics and YOU

The proliferation of password protection has become an assault on the senses. The rise of biometric authentication is helping to create some balance, enabling verification with a simple interaction, which, for many, is the fingerprint reader on a mobile phone. And once you start using the fingerprint/phone combo for NFC payments …
Bob Dormon, 29 Jun 2016
Woman motorist waves from a red car. Photo by Shutterstock

What Brexit means for you as a motorist

The UK has voted in favour of leaving the European Union and in the past few days the markets have reacted violently, plunging the pound to its lowest level against the US dollar since the mid-1980s. Nobody’s really sure what the future holds for the UK or for its economy, but the referendum result has gone against the wishes …
Ryan McElroy, 29 Jun 2016
Brexit financial crash

Post Brexit tech spending to rise like a lead balloon

Yet another analyst has delivering a damning forecast for tech spending following last week’s UK referendum decision to leave the European Union as major suppliers prepare staff for what could months of slowing sales. Channel-watcher Canalys projected local sales spending of $90bn to $100bn for the year before Brits voted to …
Paul Kunert, 28 Jun 2016
his low-angle self-portrait of NASA's Curiosity Mars rover shows the vehicle at the site from which it reached down to drill into a rock target called "Buckskin." The MAHLI camera on Curiosity's robotic arm took multiple images on Aug. 5, 2015, that were stitched together into this selfie. Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech/MSSS

The best way to find oxygen on Mars? Friggin LASERS, of course

A chemical camera sitting atop Curiosity, the Mars rover, has spotted signs that the Red Planet may have once had oxygen in its atmosphere, fuelling further speculation that it was once Earth-like. Today, Mars is a barren wasteland. Its surface is dry and caked in rust-coloured iron oxide dust particles – a stark difference …
Katyanna Quach, 28 Jun 2016
ianatlas_robot_648

Sharing your work cubicle with robots may not be such a bad thing

Keep calm and carry on; artificial intelligence will not take all our jobs and achieve world domination, according to a report released by Forrester. Prominent figures including Elon Musk, co-chairman of OpenAI, and Professor Stephen Hawking have publicly warned people about how the advent of AI will cause an existential …
Katyanna Quach, 28 Jun 2016

Jkanime dropping Neutrino

Forcepoint reckons the Jkanime site was popped last week to serve up the Neutrino exploit kit, demanding 1.2 Bitcoin from victims to release their files. Infected users had their files encrypted by CryptXXX 3.0, the advisory states. Neutrino has been on the rise since the Angler Exploit Kit dropped off the radar. ®

Violin goes for reverse stock split

As expected, Violin Memory has decided on a reverse stock split to avoid NYSE delisting, as its stock price is too low. The delisting criteria are based on a stock's price being less than $1, on average, for 30 days, and Violin easily passed under that bar back in January, and has stayed mostly under it since. Violin's board …
Chris Mellor, 24 Jun 2016

Vendors suspend tech orders as Brexit slaps Brit pound

BREXIT If there is one thing the IT industry despises it is uncertainty and there was lashing of the stuff poured across the UK following the Brexit vote. Most major vendors already came out in favour of the Remain camp - including Microsoft, IBM, HPE, SAP, EMC, Cisco and many others - the result was so unexpected for the community …
Paul Kunert, 24 Jun 2016
Pennies in a jar. Photo via Shutterstock

Technology shares slide with Brexit vote, except ARM

BREXIT Shares in British technology companies are mostly sliding after citizens of the United Kingdom voted for the nation to leave the European Union. The FTSE 100 fell more than 8 per cent at opening this morning, slicing over £100bn off of the market capitalisation of the UK's most highly rated bluechips, although this has since …
EU egg timer, photo via Shutterstock

Why you should Vote Remain: Bananas, bathwater and babies

Comment I like this tweet: History of Europe: War War War War War War War Arguments about bananas. To be honest, I'll probably go with banana arguments. #remain — Pavilion Opinions (@pavilionopinion) 29 April 2016 Never mind any arguments about the UK being sucked into a superstate and whether that's a good thing or the …
Ireland and Great Britain map, image via Shutterstock

Three non-obvious reasons to Vote Leave on the 23rd

Comment I'm just about old enough to remember the 1975 Europe referendum. Old enough to remember leaflets thudding onto the doormat (for every 'NO', there were three for ‘YES’). Most vividly of all I remember my father and our Austrian GP, who lived a few doors down in Teesside, discussing the EEC as he walked his dog past our house. …
Andrew Orlowski, 22 Jun 2016
Ross Bridge in Chattanooga TN

Chattanooga mayor credits muni broadband with aiding city's revival

The mayor of Chattanooga, Tennessee, is crediting the city's recent economic surge to a decision to defy national ISPs and build its own broadband network. Speaking at an event in his city hosted by the Fiber to the Home Council, Mayor Andy Berke said that over the last three years, unemployment in Chattanooga has fallen from …
Shaun Nichols, 20 Jun 2016
Venus UV

Astroboffins discover rapid 'electric winds' blowing on Venus

A team of planetary scientists has found that an 'electric wind' whisks away water in Venus' atmosphere, which explains why the terrestrial planet is so dry, according to new research published in Geophysical Research Letters. Venus, the second planet from the Sun, has a thick atmosphere surrounded by hazy clouds. It is the …
Katyanna Quach, 20 Jun 2016
Terminator head

Baidu tech chief: AI smart enough to take our jobs, not our lives. Yet

ISC (RotM) Artificial intelligence is about to transform society in the same way electricity did 100 years ago, but researchers are nowhere near producing the sort of self-aware sociopathic systems beloved of sci-fi writers. At least that’s what Andrew Ng, Silicon Valley-based chief scientist at Chinese Web giant Baidu, when he kicked …
Joe Fay, 20 Jun 2016

Dad of student slain in Paris terror massacre sues Google, Twitter, Facebook for their 'material support' of ISIS

A grieving father has sued Google, Twitter and Facebook, alleging the web giants enabled the Paris terrorist attacks that killed his daughter. Nohemi Gonzalez, 23, was a student spending a semester in the French capital when she and 129 others were murdered by gunmen and suicide bombers aligned with ISIS. She was the only …
Iain Thomson, 17 Jun 2016
Facepalm by https://www.flickr.com/photos/the-magic-tuba-pixie/ cc 2.0 attribution generic https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

Should we teach our kids how to program humanity out of existence?

Something for the Weekend, Sir? "Kids tend to spend far too much of their childhood in an unproductive way," it says here. I quite agree. It was the same when I was a child. All that counting numbers and spelling words they made me do over the years was a massive drain on my television-watching time. "Research shows that children have an increasing problem …
Alistair Dabbs, 17 Jun 2016
Lester poses with the Vulture 2

Lester Haines: RIP

It is with incredible sadness that El Reg must report that Lester Haines, one of our finest story-tellers and an all-round good bloke, passed away on Monday. Lester, who was 55, died of a heart attack at his home in Spain. He will be cremated on Friday 17 June. Readers will know Lester for his biting wit, his piloting of the …
Team Register, 16 Jun 2016