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iPad iPod app

Apple hit by INSIDER LEAK: New iPad Mini 3, iPad Air 2 blabbed

Apple is expected to show off new iPads at an event on Thursday – but if you want to know the features of Cupertino's latest fondleslabs before they're announced, you need look no further than the company's own user manuals. Pages in Apple's iPad User Guide for iOS 8.1, which hit the iTunes Store on Wednesday, diagram some of …
Shaun Nichols, 15 Oct 2014
Apple iPad 3 aka new iPad

Is Apple incubating a Macbook, iPad bastard child?

What do you think would happen if an iPad made sweet, sweet love to a Macbook? Just go with it please, for the sake of argument. It would give birth to a misshapen, outsized fondleslab, running a delicate and (probably) delicious integration of OSX and iOS. And a full suite of apps, naturally. But it's not going to happen, is …
Jasper Hamill, 07 Oct 2014
Apple iPad Air 2

Apple spent just ONE DOLLAR beefing up the latest iPad Air 2

New iPad Air 2 components cost Apple just one dollar more than the previous model, according to the teardown bods at IHS. The no-frills 16 gigabyte Wi-Fi flavour of fruity fondleslab reportedly costs Apple about $275 (about £167), compared to $274 for the first iPad Air. Seeing as the iPad sells for just under £400, this would …
Jasper Hamill, 29 Oct 2014
Tim Cook as Mr T

Apple's new 'iPad Air 2' sliced open, revealing (possible) A8X core

Cruel Apple fans have exposed the innards of what they claim is the forthcoming iPad Air 2, giving the world a glimpse of what could be the most intimate parts of a slab millions will soon be fondling. The rabid fanbois who run a Taiwanese site called Apple Club have posted pictures purportedly showing the rudest parts of the …
Jasper Hamill, 14 Oct 2014
iPad Photos app

Hey, Apple! We can land a probe on a comet, but we can't have a 12.9in iPad 'until mid-2015'?

Apple has delayed plans to tout a fabled 12.9-inch iPad, if you are inclined to believe the latest round of speculation. Analyst house KGI Research (via AppleInsider) said the MaxiPad will be pushed back from the first quarter to the second quarter of 2015. It's claimed Apple's assembly lines and component suppliers have been …
Shaun Nichols, 13 Nov 2014
Asus MeMO Pad 7 Android tablet

OFFICIAL: Fondling of Apple's slab declines – iPad sales DOWN in Q3

Global Q3 2014 iPad sales of have fallen by almost 13 per cent, year on year, against a backdrop of worldwide fondleslab growth, according to analyst figures released on Friday. However, Apple still owns the lion's share of the market, with iPads comprising nearly one in three tablets sold, said IDC. Shipments sank by 12.8 per …
Kat Hall, 31 Oct 2014
Apple iPad and iPad 3g

Child diagnosed as allergic to iPad

A report in the American Journal of Pediatrics suggests that the presence of Nickel in Apple's first-generation iPad may have exacerbated an eleven-year-old child's dermatitis. iPad—Increasing Nickel Exposure in Children tells the story of an un-named child who suffered persistent and severe rashes. The report's authors, …
Simon Sharwood, 15 Jul 2014
Admiral Ackbar

Wanna hop carriers with your iPad's Apple SIM? AVOID AT&T

If you're pumped about using the new iPads' multi-carrier Apple SIM in the US, don't pick AT&T as your first choice – or you'll lose the ability to switch to another operator altogether. Cupertino's marketing claims the new, flashable Apple SIM that comes in the iPad Air 2 and iPad Mini 3 allows customers to "choose the plan …
Neil McAllister, 24 Oct 2014
iPad mini 3

iPad AIR 2 and iPad MINI 3, 5K iMac: World feels different today – and it IS

Confirming what had been widely expected, Apple has unveiled two new iPad models – small and large – and laid out plans for a third. There's also a new shiny 5K iMac. The big news, though, is that the "soft SIM" war his finally begun. At a launch event in Cupertino for its pet hacks, Apple said the new iPad Air 2 will be …
Shaun Nichols, 16 Oct 2014
iPad mini 3

Same old iPad? NO. The new 'soft SIMs' are BIG NEWS

Buried in the hypegasm around the new iPad Air 2 and Mini 3 is a genuinely earthshaking reveal from Apple that could seriously change the way people buy their data. The iGiant has a introduced a software SIM card in "cellular" versions of the iPad Air 2 and Mini 3 models that can be configured to work with various carriers in …
Shaun Nichols, 17 Oct 2014
Tim Cook as Mr T

Apple is GOLDBRICKING IT: BEHOLD the iPad Glister-Slab

Apple is rumoured to be preparing to unleash a blinged-up golden iPad to satisfy some perceived consumer demand for ever more ostentatious devices. Perhaps suspecting the fanboi world has adopted the sort of goldlust more associated with Mr T than Mr Cook, the fruity firm is reportedly planning to give its new iPad Air 2 the …
Jasper Hamill, 01 Oct 2014
Our artist's impression of how BA handles lost baggage complaints

iPAD-FONDLING fanboi sparks SECURITY ALERT at Sydney airport

An iPad-obsessed bloke reportedly triggered an irritating security alert at Sydney Airport in Australia earlier today. The passenger apparently skipped the screening process and instead used an exit at the airport's Terminal 3, which is used for domestic flights, because his head was buried deep in his fondleslab. It would seem …
Kelly Fiveash, 27 Sep 2014
Apple iPad Air

Apple's new iPad WON'T be late: Tablets kicked to suppliers' factories

Apple has reportedly sent the designs for two new iPad models to its manufacturing partners to begin production on the "one large, one small" pair. A report from Bloomberg, citing unnamed sources, says that Apple has kicked off manufacturing operations. According to Bloomberg, the factories will be building both a 7.9-inch and …
Shaun Nichols, 12 Aug 2014
iPad Air

iPad 4 is so OVER: 5 times as many fanbois now using iPad Air - survey

App design and research firm Fiksu has claimed that five times more fanbois are using iPad Airs than the iPad 4 after their release late last week. Fiksu measured the numbers of people who were using apps designed using its platform. It found that 0.88 percent of the people using its apps were accessing them on an iPad Air, …
Jasper Hamill, 04 Nov 2013
Picard Facepalm

Yahoo! finally! releases! Flickr! app! for! iPad! BUT! shuns! Windows! fans!

Yahoo! has finally developed a Flickr app for Apple's iPad – but the move has upset Microsoft Windows' fans who have accused the Purple Palace of having "selective hearing" about its userbase. The Marissa Mayer-run company, which bought photo-sharing site Flickr in 2005, said on Friday that it had cooked up an app for Cupertino' …
Kelly Fiveash, 19 Oct 2014

Thin naked model slips out of Apple's secretive lab ... it's an 'iPad Air 2'

A fresh set of pictures from China show what could be the outer casing for the next iPad, possibly a thinner iPad Air 2. A user on social network Weibo posted a trio of images with the claim that the pictures depict Cupertino's new fondleslab. The report does not provide any technical details on the hardware. Screen-grab of the …
Shaun Nichols, 05 Aug 2014

Revealed: The amazing magical innovation in the iPad Mini 3 – a lick of paint

Ready to ditch your iPad Mini 2 for the latest and greatest miniature fondleslab from Apple? You may not get much more for your money. Hardware teardown specialist iFixit has dismantled of the iPad Mini 3 and found that, underneath a pile of glue and some gold paint, it's more or less the same tablet as the iPad Mini 2. iFixit …
Shaun Nichols, 24 Oct 2014
iPad and iPad mini

HOT AIR-FILLED Apple fanbois SHUNNED iPad 2 at Xmas

Novelty-seeking Apple fanbois turned their backs on the iPad 2 in the run up to Xmas, heralding the imminent demise of the ancient legacy fondleslab. The fruity firm still sells the iPad 2, which costs about 20 per cent less than the super duper iPad Air, which is the latest model. According to a report from Consumer …
Jasper Hamill, 22 Jan 2014
Fail and You

Microsoft's TV product placement horror: CNN mistakes Surface tabs for iPAD STANDS

Last month Microsoft announced a partnership with CNN for its mid-term election night coverage, with Redmond providing tech for the news anchors to use. Unfortunately, the anchors used their shiny Surface tablet to prop up or hide their Apple iPads. CNN commentators using Microsoft @surface tablets as iPad stand. Facepalm. pic …
Iain Thomson, 05 Nov 2014

Leaked photos may indicate slimmer next-generation iPad

Photos have surfaced that purport to show Apple's next iPad having a bonded LCD and front-panel glass display, allowing it to be even thinner than the current 7.5mm (0.29-inch) thick iPad Air – or perhaps the same thickness, but with a larger battery. Leaked photo of purported new iPad display, back Here's the back of the …
Rik Myslewski, 18 Apr 2014

Tim Cook: I'm NOT worried about CRAP iPad sales. It's just a 'speedbump'

Tim Cook has claimed the slowdown in fondleslab sales is not a sign of Apple's imminent demise, but merely a "speedbump" along the path to tablet world domination. Both Apple and arch-rival Samsung have been experiencing poor tablet sales, with partners of the South Korean firm sitting on some 300,000 units that no one wants to …
Jasper Hamill, 27 Aug 2014
Apple iPad 3 aka new iPad

HUGE iPAD? Maybe. HUGE ADVERTS? That's for SURE

Apple is preparing to turn its relatively humble fondleslab into a monster hand advertising billboard. The fruity firm has opened up its new iAd platform to developers, giving them the ability to show full-screen adverts on the iPhone, iPad and any future devices that use Apple's iOS. These imposing corporate messages could …
Jasper Hamill, 27 Aug 2014

Today in IT news: iPad Fleshlight a reality

From frightening-looking prototype to reality: Fleshlight has at last, er, released its iPad faux-rifice. According to its blurb, the coyly named LaunchPAD offers a "whole new perspective on masturbation..." "Annual tablet sales are now surpassing the number of PC sales with an estimated 70 million iPads being sold across the …
Team Register, 27 Jun 2014

Apple BANS 2 chemicals from iPhone, iPad final assembly line

Apple has reportedly banned its suppliers from using two potentially hazardous chemicals in the final production of the company's iThings. It made the decision to ban benzene and n-hexane from factories where suppliers were building Cupertino's fondleslabs, smartphones, MP3 players and Mac computers after it was claimed that …
Kelly Fiveash, 14 Aug 2014
Microsoft Excel for iPad

Microsoft's ALREADY telling of bugs in Fondle-Office for iPad

Microsoft has pointed out that the newly released Office for iPad won't immediately work for users of its SharePoint 2010 collaboration suite. As explained in two blog posts, one covering Excel documents and the other addressing PowerPoint files, the problem is that SharePoint 2010 “requires a plugin or active X to launch client …
Simon Sharwood, 28 Mar 2014
Apple iPad Air

Apple's new iPad Mini: ALREADY set for Black Friday PRICE SLASH

The new iPad Mini Retina has barely been available to buy for a few hours but already retailers are talking about discounts. Target has jumped ahead of the pack, by including the Mini in its Black Friday sale. Anyone who buys the fun-sized fondleslab will be handed a $75 gift card to spend on anything else they fancy. Buy the …
Jasper Hamill, 12 Nov 2013
Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella

Satya Nadella's first act may be to launch Office for iPad

New Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella is reportedly about to reveal Office for the iPad. Invitations to an event at which Nadella will appear on March 27th have started to land on reporters' desks around the USA, and favoured outlets like the WSJ-refugee-founded Re|Code and Reuters appear to be receiving pre-event whispers to the …
Simon Sharwood, 18 Mar 2014
Google Docs for iOS

Google sees Microsoft's iPad bet, raises with fondleslab Docs and Sheets

Google is bringing its Docs and Sheets applications to Apple's iOS as a pair of standalone apps for the iPad, iPhone and iPod Touch. The company said that the two productivity apps will be tailored for both Apple's handset and tablet lines with the ability to function with online, or offline as local tools. Both Docs and Sheets …
Shaun Nichols, 30 Apr 2014
Samsung Google Nexus 10 Android tablet

Don't wait for that big iPad, order a NEXUS 9 instead, industry little bird says

Google is planning to steal some of the thunder from Apple's October 16 event by quietly unveiling a new tablet running the next generation of its Android OS the day before, a report claims. Cupertino is widely expected to take wraps off its latest iPad on Thursday – which may or may not be a 12.9-inch "maxi" model that may or …
Neil McAllister, 14 Oct 2014

iPad 5, Retina iPad mini with 'A7X' chip home for the holidays – report

Apple is readying its fifth-generation iPad for launch and is moving up the debut of its second-generation iPad mini – which will have a Retina display and will be powered by an upgraded processor – from next year to the fourth quarter of this year, if a new report by a longtime Apple-watcher is correct. "Since iPad mini 2 will …
Rik Myslewski, 05 Sep 2013
Photo of burning books

Flaming heck! Watchdog scolds Apple Mac, iPad fab in staff safety probe

Apple is back in the crosshairs of human rights groups, which claim the corporation has not done enough to stamp out alleged mistreatment of workers at iThing factories. China Labor Watch and Green America claim that a joint investigation has uncovered dangerous conditions and excessive working hours at a plant that produces …
Shaun Nichols, 04 Sep 2014
Google Glass

The iPad age is over: The time of the iPad Mini and phablet is upon us

The age of the iPad is over, as tablets like the iPad Mini that sport screens of eight-and-a-half or fewer inches will out-sell their larger brethren and come to represent the largest population of in-use fondleslabs around the world. So says global consultancy Deloitte in its annual Technology, Media and Telecommunications …
Simon Sharwood, 30 Jan 2014

iPad? More like iFAD: We reveal why Apple fell into IBM's arms

Apple has been talking up its strong Mac and iOS device sales in its latest quarter – but the real news was a stonking slump in iPad numbers. The Cupertino giant said the three-month period ending June 28 was its best-ever fiscal third quarter on record. It reported revenues of $37.4bn, up six per cent year on year, which led to …
Shaun Nichols, 22 Jul 2014
The block of flats at Coronation Avenue, seen after the bombing

KRAKOOM! iPad Air EXPLODES in FIREBALL, terrified fanbois FLEE Apple store

Apple fanbois around the world are on red alert after one of the latest fruity fondleslabs caught fire and exploded in an Australian Vodafone shop. A demonstration model of the new iPad Air caused a fire so intense that the fire brigade were called. Although no-one was hurt in the fire, fanbois around the world will be sleeping …
Jasper Hamill, 08 Nov 2013

Microsoft may pick iPad for first release of Fondleslab Office™

The first tablet-optimized versions of Microsoft Office could debut on the iPad, if a recent report holds true. Veteran Microsoft correspondent Mary Jo Foley cites company sources when reporting that the first Windows 8 tablet build of Office, dubbed "Gemini", is now on pace to arrive on the market after the company releases …
Shaun Nichols, 15 Feb 2014
iPad and iPad mini

APPLE EATS ITSELF: iPad Mini set to wolf Air's market share

Shipments of Apple's latest bijoux fondleslab are expected to double next year as sales of other models dwindle. According to a report from KGI analyst Ming-Chi Kuo circulating on Apple blogs, shipments of the iPad Mini Retina will shoot up by 101 per cent in the first quarter of 2014 at the expense of the iPad Air. Meanwhile, …
Jasper Hamill, 14 Nov 2013
iPad mini with Retina display

HUMANITY STUNNED - Apple Retina iPad Mini arrives. A solemn moment

OMFG! It's true! All the signs and portents have borne fruit. After the ritual disembowelling of an Apple support tool, auguries foretold that on this day a new iPad should come forth, and lo, the Apple stores verily did shut down. Then as the day dawned, behold, even such an iPad did appear. It is the Retina iPad Mini, which - …
Team Register, 12 Nov 2013
Smashed Apple Store window

WHEEE... CRUNCH! iPad Mini tops list of most breakable slabs, mobes

Be careful, fanbois: Apple iThings have topped a list of the "world's most breakable gadgets". In a distinctly unscientific test, a group of testers from the insurance firm SquareTrade Europe dropped "gadgets" (although only pricey tablets and smartphones appear to have made the list) from a great height and dunked them in water …
Jasper Hamill, 10 Feb 2014
Laurel and Hardy on the phone

Google bigs up iOS Gmail app, leaves room for fat fingers of iPad-fondlers

Google has updated its rinky-dink Gmail app to make it easier to navigate on Apple's fondleslabs. The ad giant has finally squirted the iOS version with a full screen, portrait view of a user's stream of emails. Those who prefer to scroll through their messages while holding their iPad in the landscape position, meanwhile, will …
Kelly Fiveash, 15 Nov 2013

That Retina display iPad mini delay scuttlebutt? Fuggedaboutit

The Taiwanese market-watchers and rumor-mongers at DigiTimes have done a one-eighty on a recent report about Apple's upcoming "Retina display" iPad mini, and now say that it will be released in October of this year. Just this Monday, as Apple-watching Reg readers will remember, DigiTimes reported that the high-res iPad mini …
Rik Myslewski, 19 Jul 2013

The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event

It's just the most exciting sort of news there is: the Apple launch had the world a-jism all through yesterday UK time, before its entirely predictable events had even begun to unfold. Obviously it would be madness to simply wait until the announcement and then mention anything which was actually new in the form of a brief …
Team Register, 16 Oct 2014
Apple iPad Air 2

iPad Air 2: Vulture chews on new Apple tablet

This year’s update to Apple’s full-size iPad looks like a minor one. With headline changes like a Touch ID sensor, a faster processor, and a further reduction in thickness and weight, it is tempting to write off the mods as a little window dressing to raise the iPad’s profile in time for the winter sales fest. Apple iPad Air 2 …
Richard Brenner, 28 Oct 2014

Barclays Bank counter staff to become iPad-toting 'community bankers'

Barclays Bank is following the lead of London Underground and replacing counter staff with machines and people loitering around to show customers how to use them. The move will affect all 6,500 cashiers, who will be renamed “community bankers” and will be armed with iPads. Barclays already has 37 counterless branches, but the …
Simon Rockman, 15 Jul 2014
ipad_big_teaser

Apple to grieving sons: NO, you cannot have access to your dead mum's iPad

A bereaved man has launched a legal bid to force Apple to unlock his late mother's two-year-old iPad. Josh Grant, a 26-year-old Londoner, told the Beeb he did not know his mum's Apple ID and password. The fruity firm then refused to open up the fondleslab (presumably locked to her Apple ID) even though he has sent them copies of …
Jasper Hamill, 06 Mar 2014

Opera unveils iPad-only browser

Opera has released a browser designed specifically for the iPad. 'Coast' dispenses with a 'back' button, an omission Opera argues is sensible because a touch-enabled device shouldn't need one when a leftwards swipe can do the job. “Websites and apps today invite you to interact in new ways, but browser design for tablets has …
Simon Sharwood, 10 Sep 2013
Apple iPad 2

Apple says sayonara to Samsung's ninjas: iPad, iPhone don't infringe comms patents – report

Apple's iPhone 4 and 4S and iPad 2 products do not violate Samsung-owned patents, a judge in Tokyo ruled today, according to reports. The South Korean giant had taken its rival to court in Japan and demanded damages for alleged patent infringement, and is now considering lodging an appeal, we understand. The ruling, as reported …
Shaun Nichols, 25 Mar 2014

New Retina iPad Mini not sold out HOURS after launch - world REELS

Analysts worldwide are increasingly dumfounded today as it appears that the new Retina iPad Mini from Apple has not, according to Apple's online stores, sold out within hours of becoming available. As this article is written the UK Apple Store website still shows all models of Retina Mini available for delivery within just days …
Team Register, 12 Nov 2013
Microsoft Surface bomb

Hello! Still here! Surface 2! Way better than iPad! says slightly desperate Microsoft

Microsoft has attempted to revive the fortunes of its ailing fondleslab Surface 2 with a comparative ad campaign that pits the blue tablet against the latest iPad. In a pair of YouTube polemics, Redmond tells the world exactly what the iPad doesn't have: a kickstand, hands-free gestures and a way of monitoring your kids' online …
Jasper Hamill, 27 Nov 2013
Eve in the Garden of Eden talking to a rather angry God on Snapchat

Got an iPhone or iPad? LOOK OUT for MASQUE-D INTRUDERS

Security experts have now probed further into the vuln in non-jailbroken iOS 7 and iOS 8 devices which was exploited by the previously revealed WireLurker USB-hopping malware. Dubbed a “Masque Attack”, the tactic allows hackers to install iOS apps on iPhone or iPad via email or text message. The attack takes advantage of a …
John Leyden, 10 Nov 2014
The Register breaking news

iPad mini to outsell iPad, get Retina Display? iPad to slenderize?

It was close. We Apple fanbois nearly had to endure an entire week without an iPad rumor, but as the week drew to a close those intrepid rumor-mongers at DigiTimes gifted us with two – in the same brief article, no less – and NPD Display Search added a third. Rumor #1: According to the ocasionally accurate Taiwanese market …
Rik Myslewski, 14 Dec 2012