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Dyson Air Multiplier

'Fan docks' are about to become a thing

Yesterday at Computex, Intel announced the new Core M, a new CPU architecture based on a Broadwellian 14nm process, and said it is destined to appear in premium tablets and two-in-one typoslabs. Today, Chipzilla revealed a little more about the new product by showing off a reference design for a Core-M-equipped typoslab called …
Simon Sharwood, 04 Jun 2014
Deskinned Mac Pro

Ban-dodging Mac Pro to hit Blighty's shops as Apple bows to fan fears

Apple is preparing to release a new version of its high-end Mac Pro computer in Blighty almost a year after Eurocrats banned the sale of a previous model. A shipping date has been set for the new Mac Pro, which is the only fruity computer which allows any sort of upgrading. The Pro is aimed at business customers who need enough …
Jasper Hamill, 13 Jan 2014
Doctor Who on Kill The Moon

'Utter killjoy Reg hacks have NEVER BEEN LAID', writes a fan

Last week’s Doctor Who review of Kill The Moon certainly sparked some strong opinions. On Twitter, there were those who couldn’t agree more: Preach it #doctorwho http://t.co/HE7rdFEgFG — ℓilliane (@MakeItLast) October 5, 2014 . @TheRegister reviews the rather un-Physicsy #DoctorWho ep http://t.co/hjzMImzqqz — Stephen …
A cow

Bulls hit city streets after alleged Samsung ad shoot hits the fan

The hipster-infused suburb of Newtown in the Australian city of Sydney was today treated to the sight of two water buffalos walking down its main street, reportedly thanks to a SNAFU at a shoot for a Samsung advertisement. News of the bovine visitation broke in the tweet below and the strolling beasts quickly became a talkback …
Simon Sharwood, 25 Mar 2014
Thermaltake Black Element Cyclone Gaming Mouse

Mad fan-fitted mouse keeps mitts moisture-free

Suffer from excessively sweaty palms when you're gaming on your PC? Accessory maker Thermaltake has a - rather bizarre, IMHO - answer: a mouse with its own tiny clip-on fan. The Thermaltake Black Element Cyclone Gaming Mouse blows a gentle breeze over a player's hand, thanks to its detachable USB-powered air cooler. The …
Caleb Cox, 29 Jun 2012

Funds flung at 9-inch fan-built Raspberry Pi monitor

It's hats off today to Alex Eames of RasPi.TV and Dave Mellor from Cyntech, who've Kickstarted their way in spectacular style to an "affordable 9-inch high-def screen for the Raspberry Pi". Responding to popular demand, the enterprising duo set out to build a "small and portable" screen to take advantage of the fruity …
Lester Haines, 04 Nov 2013
The Register breaking news

Lego fan constructs Bletchley Park Colossus

It's a tip of the hat today to Lego fan James Pegrum, who's created a splendid miniature representation of Bletchley Park's famous Colossus Mark 2: James Pegrum's Lego Colossus. Pic: James Pegrum James Pegrum's not-so-colossal Colossus Mark 2 Working from an original photo of the Colossus, Adult Friend Of Lego (AFOL) James …
Lester Haines, 10 May 2013
The Register breaking news

Apple seeks cooling fan patent for iPhone, iPad

A future iPad – or even iPhone – might have a cooling fan inside, if a just-published patent application ever makes it off the drawing board and into an iOS device. The application, "Cooling System for Mobile Electronic Devices", was published on Thursday by the US Patent and Trademark Office, and describes the combination of a …
Rik Myslewski, 09 Nov 2012
Commodore 64

Retro-tech fan seeks cash for Commodore 64 clones

A brand new 1982-style Commodore 64 for just $75 (£48)? Yes, it is crazy, but that’s not stopping one enterprising retro-tech fan from trying to make it happen. Daniel Biehl has a Commodore 64 - a real one - but he knows it won’t last forever. So he wants to build a machine that will run all the C64 software out there and work …
Tony Smith, 09 May 2013
Hey presto! 3,400 likes in 45 minutes

Malcolm Turnbull's website makes funny Facebook fan numbers

Australia's communications minister Malcolm Turnbull has once again outlined how everyone - his predecessors, the press, people who disagree with him - have messed up Australia's national broadband network. A speech he delivered yesterday to the NBN Rebooted conference offered a spirited defence of his position that fibre-to-the …
Simon Sharwood, 18 Nov 2013

Big data hitting the fan? Nyquist-Shannon TOOL SAMPLE can save you

You are working on a big data project that collects data from sensors that can be polled every 0.1 of a second. But just because you can doesn’t mean you should, so how do we decide how frequently to poll sensors? The tempting answer is to collect it all, every last ping. That way, not only is your back covered but you can also …
Mark Whitehorn, 23 May 2014
Screenshot from the Facebook video Q&A with U2

Bono apologises for iTunes album dump

Bono has apologised for sending U2's latest album into every iTunes library in the world. The singer's apology came, ironically, in a video to promote the album to those who didn't get it for free in iTunes. That video, posted to Facebook features a Q&A session in which a fan asked U2 never to release an auto-downloading album …
Simon Sharwood, 15 Oct 2014
The Register breaking news

Facebook restores fan page of social scam warning site

Facebook has restored the fan page of an anti-scam site after earlier turfing out the Bulldog Estate. The expulsion, decried by security watchers, meant that a site which serves the useful purpose of warning about survey scams and malware on Facebook disappeared off the social network. Scam Snipper, another similar service, …
John Leyden, 21 Apr 2011
Our Playmonaut celebrates with three members of his fan club

Plucky Playmonaut parties as LOHAN hits Kickstarter goal

It's with the traditional portentous drumroll and mighty fanfare of trumpets that we announce we've hit our Kickstarter target to take the Low Orbit Helium Assisted Navigator (LOHAN) mission to Spaceport America. Thanks very much to all our generous backers, and we're right on the case sorting the magnificent rewards which will …
Lester Haines, 19 Sep 2014
VMSAX detail

Storage fan seeks 'mature' cash cow for 'something more'

It may come as a surprise to some people, especially reading this, but I quite like the Symmetrix (VMAX) as a platform. Sure, it's a bit long in the tooth - in marketing speak, "a mature platform". It's also a bit arcane at times - Symmetrix administrators sometimes speak a different language and use acronyms when a simple word …
StorageBod, 11 Mar 2013
The MQ-9 Reaper drone in flight

Footie fracas: MYSTERY DRONE waves flag, incites Balkan brawl

A banner-dangling partisan drone caused a mass brawl between rivals players, fans and officials during a Euro 2016 qualifying match between Serbian and Albania on Tuesday night. Suspended beneath the unmanned aerial vehicle was a banner bearing the Albanian flag and a map that included Kosovo, along with the slogan “greater …
Gavin Clarke, 15 Oct 2014
Kim Jong-un

HTC profits slump but Kim Jong Un's a fan

Taiwanese smartphone maker HTC's profits slumped 91 per cent in the last quarter, but the firm received an unlikely endorsement after North Korean leader Kim Jong Un was apparently seen using one of its devices. The company has spent most of 2012 fighting arch rival Apple in court and trying to streamline its operations. Its …
Phil Muncaster, 05 Feb 2013

Fan whips out own pair of iPhone 32Cs, 'unlocks' mobe using breasticle

A pair of fanbois in China have exposed their chests to the world in a bid to prove the iPhone 5S fingerprint scanner can be tricked into accepting nipples. The internet has been ablaze with rumours that toes, penises, noses and even the paws of a pet cat can be used to trick the iPhone 5S fingerprint detector. However, …
Jasper Hamill, 25 Sep 2013
Dyson DC37 vacuum cleaners

One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot

Video of Dyson's new hoover, sucking away. Dyson is trying out the Apple school of marketing with a teaser video for its newest product, due out on 4 September. The vacuum cleaner and fan manufacturer has popped a 26-second short on its YouTube account that appears to be shot from a camera mounted on the new piece of tech. …
The Register breaking news

Phillies fan tasered for field incursion

A 17-year-old Philadelphia Phillies fan, who "scurried around the outfield" during his team's clash with the St Louis Cardinals last night, had his home run attempt brought to an abrupt end by a solid tasering. The unnamed male jumped a fence and managed to dodge two security operatives before taking a high-voltage hit from a …
Lester Haines, 04 May 2010
Roughly 150kg of gold

IBM, HP, others admit products laced with NORK GOLD

IBM, HP, Seagate, and other companies have admitted that some of their products include gold from North Korea. The companies disclosed in recent financial filings – first spotted by Foreign Policy – that some of their suppliers sourced gold from the "Central Bank of the DPR of Korea", according to filings with the US Securities …
Jack Clark, 03 Jun 2014

Trolls have DARK TETRAD of personality defects, say trickcyclists

Are you a fan of "everyday sadism"? Then you might just be a troll, according to the boffins responsible for a study which looked into the habits of these comment thread Caligulas. In a study called "Trolls Just Want To Have Fun", eggheads from the University of Manitoba asked 1,200 online trolls what they like doing best. …
Jasper Hamill, 10 Oct 2014
Intel's 14nm package, codenamed "Broadwell"

Intel admits: Broadwell Core M chip looking a bit thin, no fans found at all

Intel disclosed on Monday technical details of its new microarchitecture for chips baked using its latest 14-nanometer process, known by the codename "Broadwell." "This new microarchitecture is more than a remarkable technical achievement," Intel VP and general manager of product development Rani Borkar said in a canned …
Neil McAllister, 11 Aug 2014

Leak: Intel readies next round of NUC

Slides of what's widely reported to be the next iteration of Intel's NUC have hit the Web courtesy of fan site Fanless Tech. The slides, here, indicate that as well as giving the fanless boxes more grunt across the board, the NUC 2.0 line will also get gamer versions. The details are straightforward enough: Core i3, i5 …
The Register breaking news

Latvian film fan pops cap in loud popcorn eater

Latvian cops cuffed a 27-year-old man on Saturday for allegedly popping a cap in a fellow cinemagoer for eating popcorn too loudly during a screening of Black Swan. According to a report by local news agency Leta, regurgitated in the Guardian, the 42-year-old victim died of wounds sustained during a screening of the …
Lester Haines, 21 Feb 2011

Speaking in Tech: 'It's as sexy as enterprise storage. Not sexy at all'

speaking_in_tech Greg Knieriemen podcast enterprise It's another episode of our enterprise tech-cast, hosted by Greg Knieriemen, Ed Saipetch and Sarah Vela. This week, the whole crew is together again with special guest Mark Twomey (aka Storagezilla). And he's not a fan of Eddie and Sarah's lunch plans! They also chat about …
Team Register, 30 Jul 2014
Denmark Minecraft map

What the BLOCK? Microsoft to gobble Minecraft-maker 'for $2bn'

New Microsoft boss Satya Nadella has set his sights on Minecraft maker Mojang as his first major acquisition, according to whispers. The move is probably worth the rumoured $2bn price tag in “woah” value alone, since it's practically the only thing that could have diverted attention away from Apple's iStuff launch on Tuesday. …
channel

Hitachi spins up 'leccy fan motor sans rare earths

Japanese electronics giant Hitachi has unveiled what it claims to be a highly efficient mid-sized electric motor built without using the rare earth minerals which have become essential to the production of much of modern technology. The 11kw motor is designed to power pumps or fans in factories and tunnels and should be ready …
Phil Muncaster, 13 Apr 2012
chalk outline of  human body at crime scene

Watch out! KILLER HP firmware update bricks ProLiant server mobos

HP has warned customers that one of its firmware updates can accidentally brick the network hardware in 100 ProLiant Server models. The Service Pack for ProLiant 2014.02.0 can potentially murder HP Broadcom-based network adapters in G2 to G7-series machines. A server relying on a dead NIC is not much use at all – and may well …
Paul Kunert, 25 Apr 2014
Cassette tape exposed

Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape

2015 will see the internet finally replace an answering machine that uses cassettes as its storage medium, or at least the answering machine used by alt.rock outfit They Might Be Giants' iconic Dial-A-Song service. They Might Be Giants created Dial-A-Song in 1983 when one member broke his wrist and the other's home was burgled. …
Simon Sharwood, 17 Oct 2014
The Register breaking news

Facebook Fan Check scareware begets malign ware-scares

Searching for information about a supposed virus threat affecting Facebook might itself be hazardous. The blogosphere was alive with talk (here and here) about an application called "Facebook Fan Check" and the possible threat it might pose. However, searching for the term "Facebook Fan Check Virus" might itself be hazardous, …
John Leyden, 07 Sep 2009

Cops: Bloke makes bet with wife. Wife loses - so hubby TASERS her

A Chicago Bears fan was cuffed on Monday night after allegedly giving his missus a right royal tasering - purportedly the result of a bet that the Illinois team would prevail over the Green Bay Packers. According to the police report, 42-year-old John Grant and his wife Nicole - a Packers fan - were watching the two teams clash …
Lester Haines, 07 Nov 2013
Alain Crozier microsoft

Le whoops! Microsoft France boss blows lid off 'Windows 9' event

When Microsoft sent out invitations to a secret press event for September 30 in San Francisco, rumors spread that it would mark the next major release of Windows. Now the president of Microsoft France has blown apart Microsoft's attempt at Applesque PR – by letting slip that "Windows 9" is indeed coming. "Last year we had …
Iain Thomson, 23 Sep 2014
Star Wars: The Complete Saga

Han Solo headed for lengthy stay in bacta tank after Bay Door Control cockup

Someone at Pinewood Studios' equivalent of Bay Door Control is probably in a good deal of trouble after septuagenarian Hollywood heart-throb Harrison Ford had his ankle broken "by a garage door" on the set of the new Star Wars movie. Ford, 71, is to reprise his role as interstellar smuggler scamp turned Rebel general Han Solo. …
Lewis Page, 13 Jun 2014

IT bods: How long does it take YOU to train up on new tech?

I’m a big fan of data networking blogger Greg Ferro, who writes under the moniker Etherealmind. Greg and I are really on the same page with regards to work/life balance but his latest thoughts on that topic struck a chord with me. Drawn from his latest blog post, the key part says: Why am I focused on work life ? After 25 or so …
Chris Mellor, 09 Apr 2014

Facebook scammers raking in $200 MEEELLION in illicit profits

A pair of Italian security researchers investigating the practice of Facebook scamming estimates that the trade brings in around $200m a year. Andrea Stroppa and Carlo De Micheli analyzed the pricing of Facebook spam on 20 black-market websites offering access to Facebook users for a price. The spammers set up fan sites and …
Iain Thomson, 30 Aug 2013
Doctor Who meme

Doctor Who season eight scripts leak online

Scripts for the first five episodes of the yet-to-be-screened and highly-anticipated series eight of Doctor Who have been leaked online. The leak is said to have come from BBC Worldwide's new Miami office, which was arranging translation of the new series for non-English speaking markets. The scripts are said to bear a BBC …
Darren Pauli, 08 Jul 2014

South African kids win global cluster glory at HPC fest

Our last day's talk with Team South Africa did nothing to tip us off that they were going to be the eventual winner of the entire ISC’13 Student Cluster Challenge. But I wasn’t the only one in the dark – I don’t think they had any idea they had a chance to win it all. Team South Africa displayed their normal good-spirited, fun …
ipod u2 edition

Bono: Apple will sort out monetising music where the labels failed

U2 singer Paul Hewson (aka Bono) has hinted that Apple is working on a new music format that will make buying music “irresistible” all over again. With Bono – who is a director of a VC fund with an interest in interactive media - it’s hard to tell to what extent he may be hyping his own interests, or how much he’s hyping Apple’s …
Andrew Orlowski, 19 Sep 2014
Asus Z97-A motherboard

Asus Z97-A puts Intel's 9 Series chipset through its paces

Here we are again. Another Intel chipset series sees the light of day – but at least this time there isn’t a new socket to contend with... Well, at the very high end there is, but that’s for the X99 Express coming later. Intel 9 Series chipset overview At launch there are two 9 series chipsets: the Z97 Express and the H97 …
Simon Crisp, 27 May 2014

Fondle my slab, baby: Inside the tactile world of Apple-fan iDating

Reg Hardware Sex Week Even in the hearts of Apple fanboys, there's room to love another human being as well as machinery. But it's better if the human receiving that love also has an iPad, say those who are presumably experts in the matter. Working on the basis that Apple fanbois/girls will be happier if they date other …
Anna Leach, 13 Feb 2012
The Register breaking news

Fondle my slab, baby: Inside the tactile world of Apple-fan iDating

Even in the hearts of Apple fanbois, there's room to love another human being as well as machinery. But it's better if the human receiving that love also has an iPad, say those who are presumably experts in the matter. Working on the basis that Apple fanbois/girls will be happier if they date other lovers of fruitchomp-branded …
Anna Leach, 13 Feb 2012

PlayStation 4 a doddle to fix: Handy if it OVERHEATS, for instance

Electronics repair biz iFixit gave Sony the thumbs-up after finding the PlayStation 4 console to be fairly easy to repair. The screwdriver-wielding bods said a first look at the new Sony games machine turned up a system with components which can easily be accessed by owners to service or repair. Peeling away stickers on the …
Shaun Nichols, 16 Nov 2013
Blik's Original Super Mario Wall Decals

Apple KILLS SUPER MARIO. And Zelda. And Sonic

Certain slab-fondling fanbois will soon be forced to cough up for a Wii U wave goodbye to their childhoods following Apple's decision to close a loophole in the next version of iOS 8 that allowed console emulators to run on iPhones and iPads. A fresh beta version of iOS 8.1 landed in developers' laps on Tuesday, and it was …
Jasper Hamill, 09 Oct 2014
JustinSheehy

CTO of NoSQL database upstart Basho beams over to VMware

NoSQL database biz Basho's chief technology officer Justin Sheehy is heading to VMware – where he will be the site leader for the virtualization giant's office in Cambridge, Massachusetts. The distributed systems executive told El Reg on Tuesday that he will report to VMware's senior vice-president of research and development, …
Jack Clark, 11 Mar 2014
Barack Obama in the Oval Office

NSA sez NO to prez: Spooks ban Obama from using iPhones

US President Barack Obama, a well-known BlackBerry fan, has said that he’s not allowed to have an iPhone for “security reasons”. In a speech at the White House promoting his healthcare changes to a youth audience, Obama said that he couldn’t use an iPhone, though he joked that his daughters seemed to spend a lot of time on …

Want a free Bosch steam iron? You'll have to TALK TO THE DEAD

Bosch have invited British punters to commune with the spirit world in order to claim a free steam iron. Anyone who buys a Bosch WAP28360GB or WAQ243D0GB washing machine at Currys is eligible to claim a free steamer, as long as they agree to hand over a small wodge of personal information. One of the questions asks customers …
Jasper Hamill, 14 Apr 2014
The Register breaking news

Escaped con regularly updates Facebook fan page

An escaped convict has provided an insight into his thinking, and irked pursuing authorities, by continually updating his Facebook status since going on the run back in September. Craig "Lazie" Lynch, 28, was serving the back-end of a seven year sentence for aggravated burglary when he failed to return to HM Prison Hollesley Bay …
John Leyden, 29 Dec 2009
World of Starcraft

Blizzard green-lights fan-made StarCraft mod

Blizzard has claimed it never intended to hinder development of the World of Starcraft massive multiplayer online (MMO) mod being developed by Ryan Winzen, even though removed a preview video from YouTube yesterday. The company insisted that the removal of the video was simply a routine procedure while it discussed with the …
Caleb Cox, 21 Jan 2011

Apple fanbois SCREAM as update BRICKS their Macbook Airs

Apple fanbois have erupted in rage after an update bricked their Macbook Airs. On the official Apple support forum, dozens of angry customers claimed that the latest software update for the 2011 Macbook Air had gone horribly wrong. Some posters said their Airs had been totally borked by the update, while others reported …
Jasper Hamill, 23 Jul 2014