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'We screwed up' sighs Sony bigwig after gaming portals collapse in DNS cock-up riddle

A couple of Sony's websites disappeared from the internet on Tuesday, leading some angry console fiddlers to accuse the Japanese giant of forgetting to pay its domain name bills. The websites www.soe.com and www.SonyOnline.net serve as portals to Sony Online Entertainment's gaming world, allowing players to take part in games …
Jasper Hamill, 16 Jul 2014
The Register breaking news

London Mayor shows off GIANT BLUE COCK in busy square

Mayor of London Boris Johnson has unzipped the flies on the latest work of art to be commissioned for Trafalgar Square's fourth plinth: a giant blue cock that proudly stands at 4.72 metres high. The unkempt, shock-headed Tory couldn't resist a bit of willy-waving in the direction of Prime Minister David Cameron either, by sagely …
Kelly Fiveash, 26 Jul 2013

Systems cock-up plagued new hospital in Melbourne

An Australian hospital is reportedly in chaos after a partnership with a cancer clinic resulted in the collapse of its booking system. According to The Age, the opening of the Olivia Newton-John Cancer and Wellness Centre, operated in conjunction with Austin Health, heralded the introduction of a new booking system in May 2013 …

Japan airport staff dash to replace passcodes after security cock-up

The dangers of writing passwords down on paper were laid bare in the Japanese airport of Haneda this week after a member of staff managed to lose a note containing key security codes ahead of US president Barack Obama’s arrival today. The unlucky Skymark Airlines employee dropped the memo – which contained a list of the codes – …
Phil Muncaster, 23 Apr 2014

New iPhone sells out, millions in hands of lucky fans, Cook cock a hoop ...

Apple has given itself a pat on the back after shifting nine million of its latest iPhone 5S and 5C models over their first weekend on sale. However, while we know that the iPhone 5S has sold out across the world, the success of the cheaper plastic-sheathed 5C is less clear. Apple has not broken down the new iPhone 5-series …
Jasper Hamill, 23 Sep 2013

COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO: NASA rovers scrawl giant willy on Mars

Space cadets tittering at the mention of Uranus have a new celestial object to giggle at: A giant penis drawn on the surface of Mars by NASA robots. Hard-up NASA in space knob outrage ... the rover's actual pic. Credit: NASA The US space agency's $820m exploration rovers Spirit and Opportunity set out for Mars in 2003 and, …
Jasper Hamill, 24 Apr 2013
The Register breaking news

Finance bods probe RBS over bank-crippling IT cock-up

A banking watchdog has launched an investigation into the IT meltdown that crippled bank accounts held by millions of NatWest, RBS and Ulster Bank customers in June last year. The Financial Conduct Authority (FCA) has begun a probe into the disaster, which saw the RBS group unable to process payments following a catastrophic …
Jasper Hamill, 10 Apr 2013

The TRUTH behind Microsoft Azure's global cloud mega-cock-up

Windows Azure suffered a global meltdown at the end of October that caused us to question whether Microsoft had effectively partitioned off bits of the cloud from one another. Now we have some answers. After a bit of prodding, Redmond sat us down with Windows Azure general manager Mike Neil, who explained to us why a sub- …
Jack Clark, 08 Nov 2013

Total Computer Networks latest to cock a snook at downturn

Total Computer Networks (TCN) booked another double-digit sales hike in calendar 2012 on the back of a surge in consolidation projects from mid-market customers. The Northampton-based HP- and Microsoft-Gold accredited partner saw turnover bounce 22 per cent, year on year, to a little over £20m - during the worst recessionary …
Paul Kunert, 24 May 2013

Elop's enlarged package claim was a cock-up, admits Nokia chairman

Nokia's chairman has admitted he was wrong to say that CEO Stephen Elop's €18.8m (£15.6m) payoff was all very regular and run of the mill. As the Finnish giant came under political pressure for promising its outgoing chief exec the whopping windfall, chairman Risto Siilasmaa incorrectly told the press last week that Elop's …
Andrew Orlowski, 25 Sep 2013
The Register breaking news

How an Amazon engineer's slip-up started a 20-hour Netflix cock-up

An Amazon engineer hit the wrong button on Christmas Eve, deleting critical data in its load balancers and ultimately knackering vid streaming biz Netflix for 20 hours. The Netflix outage hit customers in the US, Canada and Latin America on 24 December, particularly those using games consoles and mobiles to watch films, while …
Anna Leach, 02 Jan 2013

Microsoft coughs up compensation for Azure cloud cock-up

Microsoft has vowed to compensate users of its Azure cloud after an expired SSL certificate took the service offline. Victims of the Blue Sky of Death, which lasted 12 hours, will get credits as per their service-level agreement (SLA), the Redmond giant confirmed on its website. Windows Azure was knocked offline globally …

Most UK privacy cock-ups are 'careless' spaffing of personal data - watchdog

Most of the data breach incidents analysed by the Information Commissioner's Office (ICO) in a three-month period earlier this year concerned errors in the way personal information was disclosed, the watchdog has said. The ICO said that it had looked at 335 data breach incidents between 1 April and 30 June 2013 and found that in …
OUT-LAW.COM, 13 Aug 2013
The Register breaking news

Natwest freezes debit cards, online banking in fresh cock-up

Another IT cock-up at Natwest halted customers' debit card transactions last night and took down online services. The RBS-owned bank reckons its latest screw-up was fixed at 9.40am, some 16 hours after it first admitted things had gone to pot at 4.30pm. Customers complained that debit payments couldn't be made, sparking major …
Anna Leach, 27 Jul 2012
Not for hobbits

Waving an Eye-of-Sauron pulsating mock cock? STOP IMMEDIATELY

Ann Summers has declared one of its vibrators is NSFW - and the last letter doesn't stand for working. The High Street sex shop chain has recalled its range of Ultimate O sex toys over fears that power supplies may be faulty. Anyone who purchased one of the pink pleasure-givers can return it to Ann Summers for a refund. " …
Jasper Hamill, 10 Jun 2013
The Register breaking news

Virgin Media punters stung in mobile data bill cock-up

A number of Virgin Media customers were wrongly billed for mobile data usage last month due to a system error, The Register has learned. However, the telco was unable to tell us exactly what had gone wrong. A Virgin Media spokesman assured El Reg that customers who had been incorrectly billed needn't worry as the ISP is …
Kelly Fiveash, 08 Aug 2012
The Register breaking news

Teachers get earful of racy XXX chat in Capita IT cock-up

Capita's school IT wing is on the naughty step after putting teachers and administrators through to advertisements for adult chat lines. Anyone trying to get through to the support helpdesk for the Capita School Information Management System in the last few days has instead been transferred to wrong numbers, including some XXX- …
The Register breaking news

Man killed by own cock

A Bengali man has reportedly suffered a gruesome demise after he pushed his metal-enhanced cock that bit too far. Singrai Soren, a trainer of fighting roosters, was killed in Mohanpur in West Bengal after one of his birds apparently turned on him, the Daily Mail soberly relates. According to a friend, Soren forced the cockerel …
Sarah Bee, 21 Jan 2011
The Register breaking news

Let's talk about the RBS IT cock-up

One month ago a rookie IT mistake crippled the banking network of the RBS Group. Sixteen million customers – individuals and companies - of RBS, NatWest and the Bank of Ulster were locked out of accounts, unable to withdraw cash or pay into accounts for days. The cause? An “inexperienced operative” pressing the wrong button on …
Gavin Clarke, 20 Jul 2012
Photo of Microsoft Surface Windows 8 Pro, with Touch Cover

No UK date, no biz disties: Will Microsoft cock-up the Surface Pro too?

Microsoft may be playing its cards too closely to his chest for its Windows 8 Surface Pro slate: there's no word on a UK launch date nor any effort to bring the business-to-business distribution channel onside. As revealed yesterday, the Intel-powered Pro slab - billed as an office PC replacement - will be rolled out in North …
Paul Kunert, 24 Jan 2013
ebuyer

Ebuyer on the naughty step for fondleslab promo cock-up

Ebuyer has been rapped for a "misleading" tablet promotion and ordered not to repeat similar claims of cost savings in future. The Advertising Standards Agency gave the online IT bazaar a stern ticking off after receiving a complaint about an email sent to customers touting the Storage Options' Scroll Extreme Tablet PC. The …
Paul Kunert, 11 Jul 2012
T-Mobile Vairy Touch II

Auto-correct cock-up sends schools into lockdown

Auto-correct is known to be the cause of many a hilarious text misunderstanding, but when one student sent a message to say they were "gunna be" at school and the word became "gunman", you can imagine the chaos it would cause. Particularly in America. That is exactly what happened to one student at Lanier Technical College in …
Caleb Cox, 01 Mar 2012
The Register breaking news

Vodafone loses access to punters' records in IT cock-up

Vodafone is investigating a glitch with its billing system that left its workers unable to access UK customer accounts today. Punters contacting Voda to chat about their accounts were told that was impossible because the computers that host their details were down. Voice calls and data on the mobile operator's network carried on …
Anna Leach, 06 Aug 2012
The Register breaking news

Olympic Security cock-up was down to that DARN software

The CEO of beleaguered security company G4S blamed his "scheduling system" as he explained his company's failure to adequately secure the Olympics. Facing MPs on the Home Affairs Select Committee yesterday, Nick Buckles said that the company took 100 per cent of the responsibility for the cock-up that has led to 3400 squaddies …
Anna Leach, 18 Jul 2012

Accounts probe stings IT distie giant Tech Data on the bottom line

The residual effects of Tech Data's accountancy blunder have emerged in the distribution goliath's figures for the first quarter of its new fiscal year. While the numbers published today show rising sales, profits – hit by a series of charges including a $12.2m cost related to the accounts cock-up – are well off the pace. Tech …
Paul Kunert, 29 May 2014
The Register breaking news

Thousands of fingered crims, informants spaffed in web security COCK-UP

An IT blunder splashed photos of suspected criminals and details of Brits who reported them over the internet, The Register can reveal. The Facewatch website, which allows police and businesses to upload and share evidence of alleged petty crimes, was left wide open thanks to a web-server misconfiguration. The schoolboy error …
Jasper Hamill, 19 Jun 2013
Near-death...or the London Underground - is it one in the same..?

Sacre BLEURGH: Google thinks London's Victoria station is on the PARIS Metro

Google Maps is sloppily displaying the French Metro symbol for some route options on the subway London Underground. The UK capital's iconic Tube brand has been replaced with the letter "M" in some instances on the ad giant's mapping app, which is a symbol used by the subterranean transport network in Paris, France. Reg reader …
Kelly Fiveash, 29 May 2014
The Register breaking news

Castleford locals storm Tickle Cock bridge

Irate locals in Castleford, West Yorkshire, have forced the council to reinstate the suggestive name of Tickle Cock bridge - a railway underpass traditionally used by courting couples to do their... courting. The powers that be apparently decided to change the name as part of a regeneration exercise, and one official reckoned " …
Lester Haines, 18 Feb 2010
The Register breaking news

Distressed cock whipped out of wheelie bin

Animal lovers have lashed out at 'callous criminals' who left a cockerel trapped in a wheelie bin. The Telegraph reports the outrage today, adding that it has raised fears of a wave of copycock cat animal/wheelie bin outrages. Freddie the cockerel was apparently scooped out of a wheelie bin at a block of flats in Gloucester on …
Joe Fay, 07 Oct 2010

Google Nexus 7 shipping cock-up enrages fandroids

Google hasn't cloaked itself in greatness if the number of complaints from a legion of frustrated customers awaiting the arrival of the Nexus 7 is anything to go by. Those who pre-ordered the Jelly Bean Android-powered fondleslab from the web giant's online Play store late last month have told of shipping delays and poor …
Paul Kunert, 19 Jul 2012
The Register breaking news

RBS: June's tech enormo-cock-up cost us £125m

RBS's software upgrade blunder in June has cost the banking group £125m so far this year, with further costs expected. The bulk of that money was spent on compensating customers, with the cost of the actual technical fix "unlikely to cost a meaningful amount", according to group finance director Bruce Van Saun. RBS also clocked …
Anna Leach, 03 Aug 2012

Japanese finally produce a ROBOT which isn't DEAD INSIDE

Boffins have unveiled a robot that, we're confidently told, can understand human emotions. Named Pepper, the shiny machine has what appears to be a tablet computer strapped to its chest, and it resembles a cross between a mermaid and a, ahem, marital aid. It is the work of SoftBank Mobile Corp, a Japanese cell network, and …
Jasper Hamill, 05 Jun 2014
The Register breaking news

Email cock-up blamed in Check Point domain expiry snafu

Check Point has downplayed the significance of a domain renewal mix-up that resulted in its home page being replaced by a holding page for a brief period on Monday. The problem arose because Network Solutions sent the security firm's domain renewal notice to the wrong email address, a statement by the firewall and VPN firm …
John Leyden, 03 Apr 2012

Amazon offers Blighty's publishing industry 'assisted suicide'

Amazon wants to dictate book prices, and even print copies of publishers' books itself, a report in trade mag Bookseller suggests. UK publishers are, we're told, none too happy. Over in the US, Amazon is already locked in battle with Hachette, the first publisher whose terms with Amazon are coming up for renegotiation: Amazon …
Andrew Orlowski, 27 Jun 2014
Tactical facepalm

Intelligence blunder: You wanna be Australia's spyboss? No problem, just walk right in

The Australian Security Intelligence Service, ASIS, has seemingly demonstrated a peculiar weakness in its access control systems. A fluke administrative stuff-up allowed its Director-General – its most senior and therefore most sensitive role – to turn up and function for five days while he wasn't actually employed by the …
Picard Facepalm

PayPal says sorry: Fat fingers froze fundraiser for anti-spy ProtonMail

PayPal has lifted its embargo on ProtonMail, the Swiss startup raising funds via Indiegogo to build a communications system hardened against surveillance. The payment giant claims the account freeze wasn't a matter of policy, but a simple cock-up. We are happy to announce that @PayPal has restored our account access. Thanks …
Iain Thomson, 01 Jul 2014
Dunce

Immigration Dept: we have NO IDEA how many people saw asylum-seeker data

Here's why Australia's government wants the telecoms industry to do its metadata collection for it: it can't read its own syslogs. Following an astonishing cock-up earlier this year, in which the Department of Immigration published the private details of thousands of asylum seekers in a statistical publication meant only to …

Did a date calculation bug just cost hard-up Co-op Bank £110m?

A programming blunder appears to have landed the cash-strapped Co-op Bank an unexpected bill for £110m. In its financial report [PDF] for 2013, which last week revealed a £1.3bn loss, the bank said it had to stump up nine-figure "costs relating to breaches of the Consumer Credit Act". Specifically, the scandal-hit bank noted: " …
Gavin Clarke, 15 Apr 2014
The Register breaking news

Nielsen cops to iPad stat cock-up

The customarily competent media-survey firm, The Nielsen Company, has backtracked on its startling claim that one-third of all iPad users have never download an app. The company now says that the number of download virgins is fewer than one in ten. "This article and the related download have been amended to reflect updates to …
Rik Myslewski, 25 Oct 2010
Apple product placement

Apple Safari, Mail and more hit by SSL spying bug on OS X, fix 'soon'

Apple has admitted a bug in Mac OS X 10.9.1 allows hackers to intercept and decrypt SSL-encrypted network connections – and has promised to release a fix "very soon." Sensitive information, such as bank card numbers and account passwords, sent over HTTPS, IMAPS and other SSL-protected channels from vulnerable Mac computers could …
Chris Williams, 23 Feb 2014
Sergey Brin and Marissa Mayer

Google! and! Facebook! IDs! face! Yahoo! login! BAN!

Yahoo! doesn't want to play nice with Google and Facebook anymore. The result: the pair of competing free-content ad networks will be booted off Yahoo!'s turf. The purple-tinged web giant plans to stop its users from logging into sites such Flickr, Fantasy Sports and other Yahoo!-owned stuff using their Google and Facebook IDs …
Kelly Fiveash, 05 Mar 2014
The Register breaking news

Tesco pricing cock-up provokes beer stampede

Scots with an eye for a bargain and a healthy thirst mobilised en masse yesterday to storm several Tesco stores after a pricing error offered boxes of beer at irresistable prices. The deal was supposed to be "buy three boxes of beer and save £11", but punters soon realised that instead of charging 20 quid for the triple whammy, …
Lester Haines, 02 Jun 2011

Ten… top tech cock-ups of 2012

The past year provided us with some wonderful tales of innovation and expertise, but we all like to see a car crash as much as success story, right? So here's a roundup of the most colossal cock-ups of the last 12 months, including face-plants by Google, Facebook, Apple, and others who succumbed to that most universal of human …
Iain Thomson, 26 Dec 2012

Mystery bidder plunders the whole haul in Silk Road Bitcoin auction

The US Marshals Service says the entire hoard of Bitcoins seized from shuttered online drugs souk Silk Road have gone to a single bidder in an auction held on Friday. The 29,656.51306529 Bitcoins that prosecutors wrested from wallets belonging to Silk Road have an estimated real-world value of around $19m at today's exchange …
Neil McAllister, 02 Jul 2014

Former Tech Data UK beancounters may face rubber-glove treatment

The Financial Reporting Council will probe the processes used by staff linked to Tech Data UK's monumental three-year financial blunder. Blighty's largest technology distributor, previously known as Computer 2000, unearthed accountancy errors for fiscal 2011, 2012 and 2013 last spring. A subsequent internal investigation forced …
Paul Kunert, 12 May 2014
Github octodex

US giant NBC 'leaks' PRIVATE Amazon keys in Github Glenn gaffe

A London-based developer claims he was accidentally given the keys to US broadcaster NBC Universal’s websites – thanks to a username mix up on GitHub. Glenn Shoosmith was an early adopter of Github, and thus bagged the short-and-sweet user ID Glenn in July 2008. Repositories can be public and viewable by all, or private and …
John Leyden, 20 May 2014
LSI WarpDrive section

Seagate in surprise $450m LSI Flash gobble

Wow! Didn’t see that one coming; Seagate has scooped up the LSI flash business from Avago, rewriting the flash product supply business at a stroke, and speeding the concentration of flash product supply into fewer hands. Avago bought LSI in December 2013 for a cool $6.6 billion. Now Seagate will buy LSI’s flash biz, the …
Chris Mellor, 29 May 2014

PANIC OVER DROOPING house prices hits MEMBER-shaped estate

Residents of an estate in Wirral fear house prices might be seriously affected by the revelation that their sleepy corner of Merseyside resembles a giant gentleman's undercarriage when viewed from aloft. The penis-shaped configuration of houses in Wirral The ensemble of Edward Road, George Road and Yeoman Cottages do indeed …
Lester Haines, 22 Nov 2013

RBS Group hopes £750m IT shakeup splurge will prevent next bank mainframe meltdown

RBS Group has spent £750m overhauling its IT – which includes replacing the systems at the heart of its mainframe mega-meltdown in 2012. The banking giant has established three separate batch schedulers to process transactions at NatWest, Ulster Bank Northern Ireland, and Ulster Bank Republic of Ireland. It's hoped this will …
Gavin Clarke, 06 May 2014

ZOMBIE apocalypse! The 'LIVING DEAD' are HERE – Fox News confirmed it

Within the past hour, Fox News declared today is "World Zombie Day", and urged us all to "bring out the living dead" in an online cock-up. Initially it was feared the US news outlet's website had been hacked and defaced – but the broadcaster was quick to blame an "internal production problem" for the gaffe. The Fox News web …
Shaun Nichols, 05 Nov 2013