Articles about Christmas

Image: Seinfield. Credit: NBC.

Speaking in Tech: Did an open source guru just ask us to join Amazon?

Podcast speaking_in_tech Greg Knieriemen podcast enterprise This week our intrepid tech podcasters – Ed, Greg and Melissa – ham it up with Tyler Britten of the office of the CTO at IBM Cloud Platform to discuss containers, open source, AWS, Snapchat, Samsung's Note 7 and periodic corporate reorgs. Don’t sweat the tech, everything is …
Team Register, 07 Dec 2016
Apple Watch wireless charging

Everything at Apple Watch is awesome, insists Tim Cook

Apple typically leaves the phone ringing when reporters call, so an instant rebuttal from the CEO is almost newsworthy in itself. Yesterday Tim Cook broke his monastic silence to respond to a report that Apple Watch sales were in a funk. Nonsense, said Cook, who emailed the Reuters news agency to tell it that the Apple Watch's …
Andrew Orlowski, 07 Dec 2016

Veritas lays off a third of its sales staff – merry Christmas, everyone!

Veritas has axed 30 percent of its sales staff in the US and Europe, The Register has learned. The data security biz was spun out of Symantec and entered private ownership just after the turn of the year. The company is based in Mountain View, California, and employs about 7,000 people. We asked Veritas about this festival …
Chris Mellor, 06 Dec 2016
Mail rail Royal Mail courtesy of The British Postal Museum and Archive

Going underground: The Royal Mail's great London train squeeze

Geek's Guide to Britain For the last 13 years, a tiny train tunnel running through the centre of London has remained empty and unused, maintained by just four engineers. But these engineers don’t work for Transport for London or Network Rail – they work for the Royal Mail. The small gauge tunnel, running for 10.46km (6.5 miles) from Paddington to …

Online advent calendar offers mystery VM every day until Christmas

Here's something fun for Christmas: the folks behind the free and open-source hosted QEMU hypervisor have whipped up an online advent calendar that offers you a new virtual machine to download every day between now and Christmas. The 2016 QEMU Advent Calendar kicked off last week with a download of the 56kb MikeOS, apparently …
Simon Sharwood, 06 Dec 2016

1.4bn records from HaveIBeenPwned offered for your analytical pleasure

Security researcher Troy Hunt had better hope his anonymisation works: he's decided to offer up most of his “HaveIBeenPwned” data set for other security researchers to analyse. He's deduped his nearly two-billion record dataset – there's a lot of pwnage in the world, people – down to a domain-based 135-megabyte text file that …

Violin Memory axes staff just before Christmas, gives CFO $150k bonus

Violin Memory is cutting staff while rewarding chief financial officer Cory Sindelar with a bonus to persuade him to stay for another two months. Merry Christmas, Silicon Valley style. Chief marketing officer Amy Love told The Register today: “Violin is resizing the company as part of its overall turnaround efforts. More news …
Chris Mellor, 02 Dec 2016
Building IoT London

Building IoT London: More speakers, workshops added to programme

We’ve added more speakers to the lineup for Building IoT London and are ready to announce our first two workshops, meaning it’s really a good time to slip a few early bird tickets into your pre-Christmas shopping basket. Recent additions include sessions on MQTT, Blockchain, and Apache Spark, and a brace of workshops spanning …
Team Register, 02 Dec 2016
Server, photo via Shutterstock

Server market slumps as everyone stops buying

Abacus-shuffler IDC's Worldwide Quarterly Server Tracker for the year's third quarter makes for ugly reading: the firm says just about all categories of server sales have stalled. Revenue was down 7.0 per cent, year over year, and shipments decreased 4.6 per cent. It's not all bad, there's still 2.38m machines and US$12.5 …
Simon Sharwood, 02 Dec 2016
Sock with Eugene Kaspersky's face on it, given out by his company

Eugene Kaspersky is now personally defending your feet

How secure are your feet? With these exclusive socks from, er, Kaspersky, your tootsies will never be subject to another bout of ransomware again. Sock with Eugene Kaspersky's face on it, given out by his company The stylish black footwear was being handed out, along with advent calendars, at Kaspersky's Christmas bash in …
Gareth Corfield, 01 Dec 2016
Homer Simpson wearing a Glass headset to bed

The future often starts as a toy, so don't shun toy VR this Christmas

An acquaintance recently asked if he should buy his child an expensive virtual reality system for Christmas, worried that it would be used for little more than gaming. I put his fears to rest, informing him that simply having an amazing device like that at hand - regardless of how it gets used - changes the way you think. We …
Mark Pesce, 28 Nov 2016

Here's the thing: We've pressed pause on my startup

Radbot Previously, you intimated that most of you would not relish a night out on the tiles with our team (boo). No pony for you So, it turns out that this is the real world, and even when the CEO wishes for a pony*, it doesn't always trot up. And that means, dear readers and commentards, that you get to hear when it doesn't go to …

Make Christmas Great Again: $149 24-karat gold* Trump tree ornament

President-elect Donald Trump's online shop has released a tremendous ornament, the best ornament, for Christmas trees. Costing "just" $149, the bauble is officially described as a Red Cap Collectible Ornament, and it is very collectable. People are telling us how collectible it is. Potential purchasers are encouraged to "get …
letters stuffed in a mailbox. Photo by SHutterstock

Snail mail thieves feed international identity theft rings say Oz cops

You may run security software, encrypt everything, protect your very complex passwords and use two-factor authentication for everything, but the humble mailbox and the snail mail it contains can still see your identity stolen. So say Police in the Australian State of New South Wales, where Fraud and Cybercrime Squad detectives …
Simon Sharwood, 23 Nov 2016
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Amazon's Netflix-gnasher to hit top gear In December

Amazon.com looks like it is about to wade deeper into competition with Netflix, by making at least one of its new self-produced programs available for viewing around the world. At about the 45-second mark of the video below, James May of new "Amazon Original" The Grand Tour says “In December we will be launching the show …
Simon Sharwood, 21 Nov 2016
Image by Dr Flash http://www.shutterstock.com/gallery-182053p1.html

Fujitsu says 1,800 UK job cuts needed to boost ailing margins

Fujitsu’s plans to axe 1,800 jobs in the UK despite making £86.5m in profit last year is a necessary boost to margins which are “significantly below market expectation” – the firm’s UK and Ireland chair Michael Keegan has said. The Unite union announced fresh strike action at the firm’s Manchester site today to coincide with …
Kat Hall, 16 Nov 2016

Celeb-backed music TV phallus Electric Jukebox finally ready for launch

Over a year after it was first announced, the UK music startup described as "the most ridiculous digital music launch in history" will finally be available to punters tomorrow. Electric Jukebox bundles music with a £169 remote control and a dongle, so you can play tunes on your TV. After that, it's £52 a year, and the company …
Andrew Orlowski, 08 Nov 2016
The British Pound - Sterling currency tumbles post Brexit

Brexflation: Lenovo, HPE and Walkers crisps all set for double-digit hike

A second wave of double-digit price hikes are coming to a reseller or retailer near you from the start of next month, both Hewlett Packard Enterprise and Lenovo have confirmed. Since the referendum, the UK's currency has fallen from $1.49 to £1 to $1.21, a drop of 18.7 per cent and many IT makers have reacted, from the cloud …
Paul Kunert, 08 Nov 2016
An angry mob

Fujitsu staffers strike over pay, job security and pensions

Three hundred unionised Fujitsu workers braved the bitter cold on Monday to attend the first of a two-day UK strike over pay, pensions and job security. The brothers downed tools for 24 hours last week in protest of work conditions, and turned out again today, leafleting current and prospective punters in Salford's media city …
Paul Kunert, 07 Nov 2016

Happy ending for Kettering as soapy veteran replaces Mean Girl Lindsay

Kettering has drafted in EastEnders veteran Cheryl Fergison to turn on the town for Christmas – after abandoning hopes of child-star-turned-adult-car-crash Lindsay Lohan following through on her post-Brexit promise to light up Northamptonshire. Lohan made the pledge after dissing the home of Weetabix in the course of her all- …
Clodagh Doyle, 07 Nov 2016
Shot of a new Macbook Pro

Apple drops dongle prices to make USB-C upgrade affordable

Apple won't admit it got the pricing wrong, but has nonetheless slashed the cost of USB-C-to-connectors-people-actually-use dongles. Apple's new Strip Poker edition MacBook Pro offers only USB-C ports, a pain in the peripheral for anyone who has accrued a collection of USB 2.0 gadgets over the last decade. Which is to say, …
Simon Sharwood, 07 Nov 2016

Brexit judgment could be hit for six by those crazy Supreme Court judges, says barrister

Interview Britain's exit from the European Union could be guaranteed by the Supreme Court if the government has the cojones to appeal Thursday's Brexit-bashing Divisional Court verdict, says barrister Greg Callus. Speaking after the verdict was handed down in the case against the government, Callus told The Register that although the 23 …
Gareth Corfield, 03 Nov 2016
Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego

Qualcomm makes China pay

Qualcomm has had quite a boffo quarter to round off a pretty sound year. The California-based mobile processor and cellular modem designer says it now has nine of the top 10 Chinese handset manufacturers paying it royalties in one form or another on its wireless technologies. (Qualcomm has had a colorful history with Chinese …
Chris Williams, 03 Nov 2016
Thanks, I suppose. Woman contemplates unwanted gift. Photo by Shutterstock

Seagate has a flash early Xmas present for Xbox gamers

Seagate has produced an external 512GB flash drive for capacity-strapped Xbox One gamers. This Xbox-branded half TB is said to be enough for 15 titles and hooks up to the console with a USB 3.0 cable, meaning no separate power cord. It's claimed to load games and their contents faster than a similarly connected external disk …
Chris Mellor, 31 Oct 2016
Boy writes a letter to Santa. Pic via Shutterstock

Could Heather from EastEnders turn on Kettering if Lohan is no-show?

The good burghers of Kettering have been left in a pre-Christmas tizzy as Lindsay Lohan appears to be on the brink of reneging on her promise to turn on the Northants powerhouse for Christmas. La Lohan had promised to flick the switch on the town’s Christmas lights back in June, after being accused of insulting the midlands …
Joe Fay, 28 Oct 2016

Let's praise Surface, not bury it

Comment Yes, I know the new Surface kit unveiled by Microsoft (hands-on and roundup) is both lavishly over-engineered and ludicrously expensive. You know that. We all know that. But that's not the point. The Surface extravaganza is a good thing. Faced with a mortal threat, Microsoft is doing something it should have done years ago – …
Andrew Orlowski, 27 Oct 2016
iPhone 7 Plus

Squeaky bum time for Apple: It hasn’t made enough iPhone 7 Pluses

Analysis Santa may have an empty sack this Christmas, crushing the dreams of fanbois (and fanfilles). Apple admitted yesterday it was unable to meet the demand for its iPhone 7. Six weeks after the launch, Apple’s own online store is still showing long delays for several configurations of the iPhone 7. These will continue into December …
Andrew Orlowski, 26 Oct 2016
Statler and Waldorf - copyright - The Walt Disney company - the muppets studio

What will happen when I'm too old to push? (buttons, that is)

Something for the Weekend, Sir? I'd like you to consider my underwear. As we move inexorably towards another Christmas – for American readers, I understand you prefer the euphemism "Holiday Season" for its more generous syllable-count – close relatives have begun asking what gifts I might like to receive on the big day. What I want, of course, is toys. …
Alistair Dabbs, 21 Oct 2016

NSA, GCHQ and even Donald Trump are all after your data

Comment As production and usage of data keeps growing globally, it’s worth remembering that the US government wants access to your information and will use warrants, decryption or hacking to get to it. That’s not news and the US government has many tools in its box. Many had already heard of the Uniting and Strengthening America by …
Frank Jennings, 20 Oct 2016

Ubuntu 16.10: Yakkety Yak... Unity 8's not wack

Canonical's Ubuntu 16.10, codenamed "Yakkety Yak", is nowhere near as chunky an update as 16.04 LTS was earlier this year. But that doesn't mean there's nothing new. In fact, the firm's second release of the year has quite a few fresh features to hold users over until the bright and shiny future of Unity 8 and Mir arrive some …
Continuous Lifecycle London 2016 logo

Continuous Lifecycle 2017: Meet the committee...

If you’re still working up your proposals for our Continuous Lifecycle London conference next year, you might want to consider the calibre of tech pro who’ll be perusing your proposals. Whether you’re a prospective speaker, or attendee, you’ll be pleased to know we’ve got a mix of Continuous Lifecycle London veterans and some …
Team Register, 17 Oct 2016

Post-referendum UK still part of Euro cyberterror stress test... for now

European enterprises are teaming with information security agencies and governments to run a pan-European cyberwar readiness exercise today. Cyber Europe 2016 - which involves thousands of experts from all 28 EU Member States, Switzerland and Norway - is being co-ordinated by European Union security agency ENISA. It's the …
John Leyden, 14 Oct 2016
lego robot sits at lego pc. Photo by Shutterstock -EDITORIAL USE ONLY MUST CREDI cj macer

Google TensorFlow AI bots drafted into Ocado call centre service

Like so much in Britain, you can credit the weather for this. Ocado has rolled out AI using Google’s open-source TensorFlow to improve service at its customer call centre. The online food retailer took six months to build and install a system based on machine learning., using Python, C++, Kubernetes on Google Compute with …
Gavin Clarke, 14 Oct 2016
Lumia 215

Nokia crawls towards comeback with new phones announcement

The “new Nokia” appears going for volume rather than margins as it makes a comeback into phones. A new venture called HMD Global has licensed the rights to the Nokia brand for use in phones, which will be made by Foxconn. Three or four new Nokia-branded devices will be launched, Nokia’s China chief suggested in August [ …
Andrew Orlowski, 10 Oct 2016

Samsung's profits may not be as explosive as its products, says firm

Samsung Electronics has told investors to expect a modest increase in its operating profits between July and September this year, despite the costly recall of its new Galaxy Note 7 smartphones. Profits for Q3 2016 are expected to have grown by more than 5.5 per cent to between 48tn and 50tn Korean won (£5.7bn), although actual …
image by TSHIRT-FACTORYdotCOM http://www.shutterstock.com/gallery-110716p1.html

Smash and grab PoS pwners ready with pre-Xmas malware update

A smash and grab malware gang has updated its FastPoS point of sales hack app to plunder credit cards more efficiently ahead of the festive season. The FastPoS author is known for issuing an annual update to the malware which throws stealth to the wind in favour of quick and noisy raiding. The technique marks FastPoS as …
Darren Pauli, 07 Oct 2016
Virtual Skydiving at Pioneers Festival 2015

Y'know that ridiculously expensive Oculus Rift? Yeah, it just got worse

Excited gamers are going to have to dig even deeper if they want to use the new Oculus Rift virtual reality system. It's bad enough that the basic system costs $599 – almost double the expected price of $350. Today, the Facebook-owned biz revealed a range of accessories that will push its cost even higher. If you want a pair …
Kieren McCarthy, 06 Oct 2016

Amazon to hire 20,000 seasonal workers in UK

Amazon is advertising to fill more than 20,000 seasonal roles within its UK fulfilment centres. The biz currently has 10 fulfilment centres in the UK. Two new ones centre are also opening - in Manchester and Coalville, Leicestershire - next month, creating 1,500 new permanent jobs over three years. The outfit claims it has …
Kat Hall, 05 Oct 2016

Microsoft Azure sets up shop in France

Microsoft is to open "multiple" data centres in France next year as part of its $3bn (£2.6bn) cloudy investment in Europe. Chief exec Satya Nadella said the Windows giant has more than doubled its cloud capacity in Europe in the past year. Last month Microsoft opened shop in Blighty with three data centre locations in London, …
Kat Hall, 03 Oct 2016

Dirty diesel backups will make Hinkley Point C look like a bargain

Britain signed off on the most costly energy deal it has ever made this week – but the price we agreed for energy from Hinckley is still lower than the peak prices that will hit British wallets even harder, and sooner. Current commitments to renewable generation will cost each household £466 by 2020/21, the centre-right think …
Andrew Orlowski, 30 Sep 2016

ZX Spectrum Vega+ will ship on time, developer claims amid doubts

Retro Computers, the biz behind the Sinclair-compatible ZX Spectrum Vega+ handheld console, is rebutting claims by critics that the gizmo will not be ready in time for its target launch date. Earlier this week, Retro Computers announced to the world that the ZX Spectrum Vega+ is to get an official launch on October, as …
Dan Robinson, 29 Sep 2016

Sinclair fans rejoice: ZX Spectrum Vega+ to launch October 20

Ageing fans of 1980s home computer games will soon be able to get their hands on Sir Clive Sinclair’s rebooted ZX Spectrum device, which is now set to be launched in October and available just in time for Christmas. The eagerly awaited Sinclair ZX Spectrum Vega+, which was bankrolled via crowdfunding site Indiegogo, is to get …
Dan Robinson, 27 Sep 2016

The server's down. At 3AM. On Christmas. You're drunk. So you put a disk in the freezer

On-Call The On-Call inbox is full to overflowing, so we felt like letting another reader's tale of late-night weirdness into the wild. In this tale, reader “Nic” told us that “Back in the 1990s when being a web designer was a job and ISDN was considered hot stuff I worked as a sysadmin at an outfit strategically located above a guitar …
Simon Sharwood, 27 Sep 2016
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Earliest ever recording of computer-generated music is restored

Audio Kiwi boffins have claimed to have restored the earliest known recording of computer-generated music, from 1951. The recording, released today by the Guardian, opens with what the Guardianistas describe as the "staunchly conservative" national anthem, God Save the King. It was made by the BBC at the University of Manchester in …
Cambridge bikes photo MK Jones via Shutterstock

Turing, Hauser, Sinclair – haunt computing's Cambridge A-team stamping ground

Geek's Guide to Britain King’s Parade in Cambridge looks like the last street on earth to have anything to do with computing. On one side is an absurdly ornate college gatehouse in yellow stone and King’s College Chapel, which combines the barn-like shape of a tiny chapel with the scale and detail of a cathedral. The other side is lined by tall …
SA Mathieson, 26 Sep 2016

Korean cargo line bailout saves Christmas for tech companies

Bankers have loaned US$100m to Korean shipping line Hanjin, likley saving Christmas for tech companies, distributors and retailers. Hanjin's finances ran aground in late August, when it filed for bankruptcy. That filing meant that the company's 97 container ships and the half a million or so containers they carried entered …
Simon Sharwood, 23 Sep 2016
Icomp's licensed C64 cases

World+dog to get retro classic Commodore 64 for Christmas

German retro enthusiast Jens Schönfeld of Individual Computers is about to start manufacturing new Commodore 64 cases from the classic home computer company's original injection moulds. His announcement follows a licensing deal with the outfit that now owns Commodore's trademarks, Polabe Holding. Schönfeld's announcement …
Venomous snake

1TB SanDisk flash cam card

Western Digital's SanDisk unit has developed a prototype 1TB capacity SDXC camera flash card. SanDisk intoduced a 512GB SDXC format card in 2014. The doubled capacity product is suited for 4K and 8K photo and video use, and operators can store more on a card before having to change it. We might expect the product to ship in …
Chris Mellor, 20 Sep 2016

Three outsources staff to Capita

Staff at Three are poised to receive a very early Christmas present - in the form of a Transfer of Undertakings Protection of Employment notice to everyone's favourite outsourcer Capita. Under the £70m deal over the next seven years, 450 employees in customer service, sales and operational management in Three’s Glasgow contact …
Kat Hall, 20 Sep 2016
Hololens

Hololens for biz shocker: Surprisingly, it doesn't totally suck

Review At $3,000 Microsoft’s Hololens isn’t going to be in too many gamers’ Christmas stockings this year, being more of a chance for corporates to work out the business case for augmented reality. I did manage to get my hands on, and head in, a Hololens set. I did so thanks to Kazendi who – for £17,500 – can knock out a fixed-price …
Dominic Connor, 12 Sep 2016