Articles about Beeb


We forget NOTHING, the Beeb thunders at Europe

The BBC has decided that the EU's controversial “right to be forgotten” diktat won't succeed in making its news stories vanish from Google. To get around Google's Euro memory hole, which has resulted in the Chocolate Factory getting 270,000 requests to drop search search links, the UK national broadcaster has decided to list any …
BBC iPlayer

Apple fanbois eat static as Beeb, Sky web stream vids go titsup on iOS

Apple fans' expensive iOS gadgets have been cut off from video-on-demand services from the BBC and Sky due to an unknown fault. The Beeb's iPlayer, Sky Go and Sky's Now TV have been inaccessible since midnight last night, at least for Cupertino gear, and none of the companies involved have provided an explanation of exactly what …
Peter Capaldi as Dr Who. Credit: BBC

New Doctor Who's new costume newly REVEALED by Beeb

The BBC has taunted bereft Doctor Who fans with the first images of their new Doctor, Peter Capaldi, in costume. Peter Capaldi in costume as Doctor Who El Reg won't hazard a guess as to how much Crombie and Doc Marten paid to be mentioned by name in the teaser, but while the new Doctor's dark blue trousers and white shirt are …
Doctor Who in Listen

Think beyond the Beeb: Gov consultation is crucial for free telly

Breaking Fad Do you like your free-to-air TV? It looks like a reasonable chunk of spectrum will be saved for terrestrial broadcasting at the WRC–15 meeting later this year, but the battle for Freeview is far from over. Doctor Who in Listen Listen up: it's time to have your say on the BBC A couple of months back, the BBC Trust gave the …
Nigel Whitfield, 31 Jul 2015
Public domain, right size for index

BBC veterans require skilled hands to massage their innards

The National Museum of Computing (TNMOC) has made an appeal for volunteers who could help them keep their BBC Micro computers – which the museum uses to give visiting young'uns a taste of hacking history – in good health. TNMOC is looking for people familiar with the BBC Micro computer and its peripherals, as it is seemingly …
The Register breaking news

Ofcom's head Ed may yet run the Beeb: UK gov 'mulls axing BBC Trust'

Is Ofcom boss Ed Richards' middle name "Lucky"? The UK watchdog's supremo could yet end up running the BBC without leaving his desk at Southwark Bridge. Last year, the former Labour policy wonk – who helped create Ofcom – applied to get the top job at the Beeb, only to lose out to George Entwistle. Now it's claimed the …
Andrew Orlowski, 09 Sep 2013

BBC joins war against Flash, launches beta HTML5 iPlayer

It may not be the definitive decision which propels humanity towards our inevitable end, but in a post on the Beeb's internet blog, James East, the Media Playout Product Manager, stated that his team is now confident they can "achieve the playback quality you'd expect from the BBC without using a third-party plugin." HTML5 has …
Doctor Who and Sarah

SCRAP the TELLY TAX? Ancient BBC Time Lords mull Beeb's future

It was as good as anything on the telly. Four past BBC chiefs were giving MPs their opinions at Westminster. The Commons media select committee is running an enquiry into the future of the BBC, looking at how it should be governed, and as technology and habits change, whether should there even be a per-household fee levied on …
Andrew Orlowski, 13 Feb 2014
The Register breaking news

Beeb stuffs $21tn into Olympic-sized swimming pools

The BBC has agreebly calculated that the amount of wonga Brits have squirrelled away in offshore accounts would fill no less than 10,000 Olympic-sized swimming pools. The total in question is $21tn, or £13.5tn. Were this substantial wedge "denominated in $1 bills", it would occupy rather a lot of Olympic Park Aquatics Centres. …
Lester Haines, 30 Jul 2012
Diagram showing micro:bit spec

BBC Micro:bit delayed by power supply SNAFU

The BBC has admitted that the Micro:bit, the computer it plans to give to up to one million children, is not going to arrive on time due to quality problems. The Micro:bit was announced in March as a "get kids coding" initiative. Delivery was anticipated to occur in September, so that every 11 or 12 year-old in the UK could be …
Simon Sharwood, 18 Sep 2015

Arctic ice EMBIGGENS, returns to 1980s levels of cap cover

The Arctic ice cap has not, contrary to the predictions of climate alarmists, completely disappeared: in fact it has been growing rapidly, increasing by an entire third just in 2013 and more since. "It would suggest that sea ice is more resilient perhaps. If you get one year of cooler temperatures, we've almost wound the clock …
Lewis Page, 21 Jul 2015
Grand Theft Auto Lindsay Lohan lookalike

Grand Theft Auto maker lobs sueball at BBC over biopic

A spat between the creators of Grand Theft Auto and the BBC has spilled over into a legal feud. Take-Two Interactive, parent company of Rockstar Games, has filed suit against the UK broadcasting company over allegations of trademark infringement for its decision to cast a biopic about the games developer's history. According to …
Shaun Nichols, 21 May 2015

BBC websites GO TITSUP – Auntie blames 'internal system failure'

Updated The BBC is suffering a major outage, after its websites – including News and the public service broadcaster's iPlayer system – buckled in the past hour. It's unclear, at time of publication, what was behind the Beeb's technical woes. An unknown number of people attempting to visit various online BBC services were greeted with a …
Kelly Fiveash, 14 Mar 2015

Seven months of Basil Brush on YouTube: Er, boom boom?

Legendary stuffed TY character Basil Brush will now be available on YouTube, after TV bosses reportedly refused to give him fresh airtime. According to the Daily Mirror, Brush will be releasing a new sketch every Monday for the next 32 weeks. Brush, who, we are told, is currently on a nationwide tour, said: “I was on the Beeb …
Gareth Corfield, 21 Feb 2015
BBC Testcard

BBC waves £230m of feepayers' dosh at tech backbone deal

The Beeb is dangling hundreds of millions of license fee payers’ pounds in front of network sellers for upgrading its plumbing and serving up connectivity services for years to come. The contract notice, published in the Official Journal of the European Union, reveals Auntie is seeking to appoint a “single supplier” for the next …
Paul Kunert, 07 Apr 2015
The Register breaking news

Beeb measures Blighty in doormats

The BBC's improbable units department was in fine form last week when it decided to quantify the land area of the United Kingdom in doormats. In this illuminating piece on just how may noughts a trillion has, Auntie notes that Blighty's 244,820 sq km area is the equivalent of 1,000,000,000,000 doormats, based on a standard foot- …
Lester Haines, 01 Nov 2011
Higher Education and Further Education

Ex-Beeb online news guru joins Brit speech-analysis startups

Former BBC guru Matt Karas has left his post as CTO of private course provider FutureLearn to back two new British speech startups. One of those startups, Speech Engineering Ltd, employs new algorithms for identifying the acoustic features of speech - such as the speaker’s emotional state and regional accent. It’s pitched at …
Andrew Orlowski, 29 Oct 2013
The Register breaking news

Beeb's iPlayer dismisses radio show as 'b011ckxs'

Fans of comedy urls are invited to raise a pint this afternoon to the Beeb's iPlayer, which is currently providing added value to Episode 7 of the 74th series of Radio 4's The News Quiz: As our informant Tom Davie puts it: "What a great URL :)". …
Lester Haines, 03 Jun 2011
The Register breaking news

Don't tell the D-G! BBC-funded study says Beeb is 'too right wing'

A study funded by the BBC into editorial bias has concluded that it isn't Left Wing enough: it's too friendly to business, and far too hostile to the European Union. The "voice of the licence-fee payer", the BBC Trust, commissioned the study, and gave the job to academic Mike Berry of the Glasgow Media Group - the latter a Dave …
Andrew Orlowski, 09 Sep 2013
The Register breaking news

Beeb rolls out global paid iPlayer app in €urope

Expats or foreigners who own an Apple iPad and are interested in a weekly dose of Brit TV gruel – grisly East End folk, crappy daytime shows or pointless period dramas – should rejoice, as the Beeb is launching an international version of iPlayer. The on-demand service app will be available in 11 European countries in the …
Paul Kunert, 28 Jul 2011

Journos to be spared replacement by robots, BBC claims

It's sighs of relief all round here at Vulture Central today as a handy BBC guide as to whether or not you're scheduled to be replaced at work by a robot reveals that journalists are at a mere eight per cent likelihood of automation*. Screengrab showing the BBC's prognosis for journalists The chilling facts are these: …
Lester Haines, 15 Sep 2015
Cybermen in Dark Water

BBC clamps down on ILLICIT iPlayer watchers

A gang of British licence fee payers have grabbed their virtual pitchforks and marched on the Beeb in protest against its decision to ban iPlayer RSS feeds. The changes are designed to stop naughty viewers from using third-party clients to watch the Beeb. Several Register readers have contacted us and complained about the …
Jasper Hamill, 03 Nov 2014
Emojis from Apple's beta of iOS 6

Gay emojis? GAY EMOJIS?! Not here in Russia, comrade

The Russian government is reportedly looking to ban "gay" emoji symbols over fears the same-sex pictures could violate censorship laws. Russia's Izvestia newspaper reports that Russian senator Mikhail Marchenko has issued a complaint that a collection of new emojis depict same-sex couples. Marchenko argues the emojis are in …
Shaun Nichols, 01 Aug 2015
The Register breaking news

NDS says Beeb's Panorama emails were 'manipulated'

TV crypto company NDS says the BBC misled viewers in a Panorama investigation broadcast on Monday. The former Murdoch company, which was acquired by Cisco earlier this month, has released what it says are the original emails. The Beeb alleged that NDS gave a "hacker honeypot" website named Thoic access codes that could be used …
Andrew Orlowski, 29 Mar 2012
The Register breaking news

Beeb rights swapper swaps shop to swap-shop for red-tops

James Lancaster, the former head of rights negotiations at the BBC, has been picked for the new UK digital copyright exchange project. The exchange is intended to allow easier licensing and use of copyrighted digital material. Lancaster will head the new Copyright Licensing Steering Group (CLSG), and his work will involve …
Andrew Orlowski, 21 Nov 2012

And on that bombshell: Top Gear's Clarkson to reappear on Amazon

Amazon Prime has signed up Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May for a car show intended to rival Top Gear on its streaming service. The show will be produced by their long-time executive producer Andy Wilman, said the company in a gloating press release. The trio have committed to three seasons as part of the TV …
Kat Hall, 30 Jul 2015
A person's chubby legs are seen above a scale. Photo via Shutterstock


Research by a crack team from the Department of the Bleedin' Obvious indicates that the UK's growing fat crisis could be tackled by people stuffing less grub into their faces. In fairness to the University of Cambridge nosh squad responsible for this shock conclusion, the actual finding is that "reducing the portion sizes …
Lester Haines, 16 Sep 2015

French say 'non' to Netflix, reveals entertainment report

French consumers prefer to stick to good, old-fashioned live telly rather than those new-fangled digital services such as Netflix, a report has revealed. According to the reserch – carried out by Futuresource Consulting – 75 per cent of French respondents say live TV is still their primary viewing choice. The Beeb needs to be …
Jennifer Baker, 19 Aug 2015
A humpback whale shows its open mouth as it breaches the surface of the sea.

EXTREME FEEDING: BLUE whales' gluttonous gobbling of fishy fluids

Marine mammal boffins are less baffled by blue whales, having discovered that stretchy nerves allow the beasts to gobble the gallons upon gallons of water and food they are famous for guzzling. In a paper with the pleasantly explicit title "Stretchy nerves are an essential component of the extreme feeding mechanism of rorqual …
The Register breaking news

Beeb flogs Doctor Who episodes via Facebook

BBC Worldwide has begun offering episodes of the Corporation's hugely popular Doctor Who as rental options via Facebook. "As we have grown internationally, we've seen through our Facebook channel that fans who are loving the new series are asking for a guide into our rich Doctor Who back catalogue," said the Beeb's commercial …
Kelly Fiveash, 13 Jul 2011
The Register breaking news

The Beeb is broken

The BBC homepage is on an outage at the moment, with visitors greeted with a stripped down version of the normal site. Screenshot of the BBC homepage at 13:42 Fri Nov 4 2011 Whoops A little info icon directs you to the following explanation: Due to technical problems, we are displaying a simplified version of the BBC …
The northern giant mouse lemur and its improbably large testicles. Pic: Melanie Seiler

Biologists gasp at lemur's improbably colossal bollocks

Scientists are marvelling at a lemur with testicles so large that were a human chap to carry equivalent plums in his trouser department, they'd be the size of a couple of grapefruit. The average male northern giant mouse lemur (Mirza zaza) tips the scales at just 280g, but has "an average testes volume of 15.48 cubic centimetres …
Team Register, 03 Jul 2015

BBC gives naked computers to kids (hmm, code for something?)

Comment The Beeb is trying to recapture the past glories of the BBC Micro with the “Micro Bit”, a single board computer it’s giving to every single 12-year-old in the UK, with the hope of inspiring them to learn programming or (perhaps more politically correct) coding. This still-in-development device, part of the wider Make it Digital …
Dominic Connor, 16 Mar 2015

Rampaging fox terrorises rural sports club, victim sustains ‘tweaked groin’

Shaken members of a Cambridgeshire sports club have recounted a terrifying ordeal at the jaws of a rampaging fox. According to an entertaining BBC report, the victims were confronted by the "vicious" creature as they attempted to leave Alconbury Sports and Social Club last Saturday night. In the ensuing panic, chairman Bruce …
Team Register, 03 Jul 2015
BBC iPlayer

BBC goes titsup: iPlayer to News websites down – Auntie working to fix it

Updated The BBC's web servers fell over today, taking down its online news and iPlayer services – but it's unclear whether the outage relates to the significant Distributed Denial of Service attack hitting Sony's gaming network right now. Sony's Entertainment Online chief confirmed earlier today that the media giant was suffering a " …
Kelly Fiveash, 24 Aug 2014

Holy sh*t! Amsterdam man in pop-up public toilet shock horror

RoTM A man in Amsterdam suffered minor injuries last night after a toilet emerging from the ground flipped a moped into the air, which then struck the victim. UriLift loos were installed in the wacky baccy Dutch city in an effort to stop blokes taking a slash in the streets. As this vid shows, the toilets appear to rise up from the …
Team Register, 29 Nov 2014
The Register breaking news

Beeb deploys ISS as unit of measurement

It's hats off to the Beeb today for creating the "most marvellously pointless measurement", as our informant Alex Cooksey puts it. In a bold challenge to the linguine, the double-decker bus and the brontosaurus, Auntie has calculated that the estimated $1.1bn in dollar coins currently languishing in US government vaults would, …
Lester Haines, 10 Aug 2010
MINOS Experiment image taken by Peter Ginter for Fermilab - The MINOS experiment sends a beam of neutrinos 450 miles straight through the earth from Fermilab to northern Minnesota - no tunnel necessary

Beaming boffins feel the rhythm as neutrinos oscillate over 500 miles

Scientists working on the NOvA experiment have spotted what they say is evidence of oscillating neutrinos for the first time in the lab's particle accelerator. Since February 2014, boffins have been stashing data and recording interaction of the abundant, yet elusive, subatomic particles as they interacted in the specially- …
Kelly Fiveash, 09 Aug 2015
Doctor Who in Listen

Does Father Christmas expect a happy ending with Clara in Doctor Who?

Vid Shaun of the Dead star Nick Frost will appear in Doctor Who's Christmas special as Santa Claus. Youtube Video Viewers of last night's finale on the Beeb will have seen Frost arrive at the entrance to the Tardis as a deadpan Father Christmas, after the Doctor's cryptic farewell with Clara. Coo-eee! [knock, knock] Hello. [knock …
Team Register, 09 Nov 2014
Grant Shapps, Conservative Party chairman. Pic: Sportsfile Web Summit

BBC (sort of) sorry for Grant Shapps Wikipedia smear reportage

The BBC has apologised to MP and former Conservative Party chairman Grant Shapps for the way it reported allegations regarding Shapps and Wikipedia, which were based on a single anonymous source. Shapps lost the position of party chairman and left the Cabinet, despite running a successful general election campaign. He is …
Andrew Orlowski, 30 Jun 2015
The Register breaking news

Beeb rescues old Who episodes

The BBC has announced that two of the “missing” 1960s-era Dr Who episodes have turned up and been added to the Beeb’s archives. The latest recoveries, the first since 2004, made their way somehow from Australia to the BBC via Southampton. Like most broadcasters, the BBC had trouble storing bulky pre-digital recordings of years …

National Lottery website goes TITSUP again

The UK National Lottery website was down and out for the second time in days this morning, indicating further plumbing work was required following last weekend’s network wobble. The site first crashed early on Sunday for roughly 18 hours due to a technical glitch that lotto operator Camelot Business Solutions told us had been …
Paul Kunert, 03 Feb 2015

BBC: We'll give FREE subpar-Raspberry-Pis to a million Brit schoolkids

The BBC is to dish out tiny primitive computers to all 11-year-olds in the UK this autumn. Under its "Make it Digital" campaign, designed to get kids into writing software and getting hands on with electronics, the broadcaster will hand out one million of the "Micro Bit" gadgets. The name is a homage to the BBC Micro computer …
Kat Hall, 12 Mar 2015
The Register breaking news

Beeb creates new global iPlayer post

The Worldwide wing of the BBC has hired Mark Smith as its global iPlayer launch director, in its latest attempt to get its video-on-demand service off the ground outside the UK. That plan is scheduled for next year, but it needs approval first. So Smith’s job is presumably to push for approval of the overseas extension. The …
Kelly Fiveash, 10 Sep 2010
Artist Impression of Giant Magellan Telescope

Half a billion for BLOODY BIG telescope in Chile

The planned largest optical telescope in the world, the Giant Magellan Telescope looks to go ahead, with its consortium signing off on the US$500 million build cost. The telescope is ambitious engineering: seven mirrors spanning a total of 25 metres, which the project says will focus “six times” the amount of light collected by …

700,000 beautiful women do the bidding of one Twitter-scamming man

Satnam Narang of Symantec says one scammer was so taken with Twitter he established 750,000 accounts. The senior security response manager found the one man spam plague set up the mind boggling number of Twitter accounts he calls 'mockingbirds' to flog Green Coffee Bean Extract earning cash for visitors referrals. Narang said …
Darren Pauli, 27 Mar 2015
The Register breaking news

Beeb reinstates teaboy in Pestogate scandal

Its fair play to the Beeb this morning as it appears to have brought the Pestogate image scandal to an end by giving El Reg a two-finger salute*: The BBC finally sticks its own photo on the piece Splendid. That's a BBC photo of a BBC building all right, and here for the record are some other photos of BBC buildings not by the …
Lester Haines, 02 Jul 2010
Image of HAL eye from 2001 movie with Chrome logo in eye

A MILLION Chrome users' data was sent to ONE dodgy IP address

A team of security researchers have found malware in a popular Chrome extension which may have sent the browsing data of over 1.2m users to a single IP address. ScrapeSentry credits its researchers with uncovering "a sinister side-effect to a free app [...] which potentially leaks [users'] personal information back to a single …

World's largest ship swallows 900 MEGATINS of baked beans

The BBC is having an Olympic swimming pool-sized field day at the news that the world's largest ship – the CSCL Globe - has docked at the Port of Felixstowe. According to Auntie, the China Shipping Container Lines-owned behemoth "is more than 400m (1,312ft) long, the equivalent of eight Olympic-size swimming pools", while its …
Lester Haines, 09 Jan 2015
Parrot Ar.Drone

Drone in NEAR-MISS with passenger jet at Heathrow airport

An unidentified drone came very close to colliding with a passenger jet in the summer, an official report to be published this week will say. According to the Sunday Times (£), which has seen the Civil Aviation Authority's document on the risks associated with the growing popularity of drones, an Airbus A320 was involved in the …
Kelly Fiveash, 07 Dec 2014