Original URL: https://www.theregister.com/2014/03/07/stratominx/

LOHAN chap hooks up with busty stratominx in cosmic pleasure cruise

Spaceplane team shocked by high-altitude cleavage outrage

By Lester Haines

Posted in Science, 7th March 2014 23:36 GMT

NSFW vid The Register's Low Orbit Helium Assisted Navigator (LOHAN) team has expressed its shock and dismay that member Dave Akerman has chosen to play away from home with a lads' mag busty stratominx.

Dave's a veteran of countless balloon launches, and is regularly approached by people in bars asking to be "taken to heaven and back". Sadly, the flesh is weak, and it's with more than a degree of disappointment that we report that the ample charms of Zoo regular Caitlin Wynters proved irresistible to the previously respectable Raspberry Pi-powered flight guru.

Youtube Video

I have today sent Dave an formal email explaining that such tomfoolery might have a serious affect on the credibility of LOHAN. Fellow team member Paul "Lord Shax" Shackleton joined me in suggesting the mission lacked scientific rigour, although he did admit the ample cleavage aspect of the flight "works for me."

We have made our busty brunette space dossier available to the CAA, lest British airspace be again threatened by flying cardboard cut-out jubbery. We didn't bother to inform GCHQ, since the Cheltenham defence-of-the-realm spooks will doubtless have already tapped into the outrage on! our! Yahoo! webcams! ®


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