Original URL: https://www.theregister.com/2012/03/19/lohan_wildlife/

LOHAN's fantastical flying truss menaces kiddies

'Please quit releasing balloons', pleads animal lover

By Lester Haines

Posted in Science, 19th March 2012 09:27 GMT

We at El Reg's Special Projects Bureau generally have little contact with the internet mosh pit, where the bottom feeders vie for immortality in the pantheon of the obtuse.

However, from time to time, we're obliged to confront the unwashed masses down at YouTube, which as readers will be aware is the Rwandan genocide of cyberspace in which angry netizens trade violent verbal insults and spout breathtakingly witless criticism.

Rest assured, we've got the "Allow all comments with approval only" button checked on all our vids, but here's one piece of feedback on our LOHAN's fantastical flying truss which we decided to let through for its Friday afternoon entertainment value:

And all goes well until the truss falls from the sky and impales an unsuspecting child as he play with this [sic] friends in the schoolyard.

Please quit releasing balloons - this harms our environment and kills wildlife.

Well, the balsa wood truss weighed a hefty 173g, so you can imagine the kind of damage it could do to the innocent wildlife if it did indeed plummet into a schoolyard. It's a sobering thought. ®

Bootnote

While I was having a look at some of the more sensationally stupid comments down at YouTube, I was reminded of a time I was obliged to drive from London to Bristol with a work colleague dubbed "The Village Idiot" for company.

After an hour of banal gibbering, he said: "What's your favourite car?"

I replied: "I don't like cars."

Undeterred, he insisted: "Yes, but if you did like cars, what would be your favourite?"