Jacques Chirac ditches devil dog
Three strikes and you're out, chien diabolique
French former grand fromage Jacques Chirac has been forced to exile his "beloved" mutt Sumo, after it laid into him for the third time.
The Maltese terrier was apparently a bit miffed about being shifted from the spacious grounds of the Élysée Palace to a Paris apartment when his owner stepped down from office in May 2007. Chirac's missus Bernadette said the dog had been "treated for depression" as a result of the move, and has manifested his unhappiness by launching a trio of assaults on hubby.
In January, he sank his teeth into an "unnamed body part" belonging to his owner. The BBC does not chronicle the second harrowing incident, but explains that the third occurred when "Sumo had been lying quietly at [Mrs Chirac's] feet but flew into a violent rage on the approach of her husband".
The poor old ex prez suffered a bite to the stomach, and decided enough was enough. His wife confirmed Sumo had been exiled to a farm in Seine-et-Marne and was "very happy" there. Bless. ®