Original URL: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/07/26/extra_porridge/
Masturbating lag cops 60 days' extra porridge
'Indecent exposure' rap for five-knuckle shuffle
A Miami lag who decided to crack one off without hiding his modesty beneath a blanket was sentenced to 60 days' extra porridge on an indecent exposure rap, the Miami Herald reports.
Terry Lee Alexander, 20, was caught on camera by a female Broward Sheriff's detention deputy who saw him indulging in an uninhibited five-knuckle shuffle last November while she was monitoring inmates from a "glass-enclosed master control room".
Coryus Veal told a court this week that Alexander "did not try to hide what he was doing as most prisoners do".
The case hinged on the definition of Alexander's cell. His defence attorney Kathleen McHugh argued it was a private space, but the jury eventually decided it was actually neither public nor private, but rather a "limited access public place". This turned out to be bad news for Alexander, since beating the bishop counts as indecent exposure, even if public access to the spectacle is limited.
The pre-trial jury selection provided some light relief for the participants when McHugh asked 17 potential candidates who among them had never run in single user mode. "No hands went up," notes the Miami Herald. Hughes subsequently probed Veal by demanding: "Did other inmates start masturbating because of Mr Alexander? Did you call a SWAT team?"
"I wish I had," replied Veal - probably truthfully since she also charged seven other inmates with the same onanistic outrage.
In the end, it took the jury of four men and two women just 45 minutes to find Alexander guilty. Broward County Judge Fred Berman duly sentenced Alexander to 60 days' chokey on top of the 10 years he's currently serving for armed robbery. Juror David Sherman said: "It was pretty straightforward. The prosecution's case was clear, and the defense did not dispute any of the major elements."
Of the seven other cases of Veal copping an eyeful, four pleaded guilty to indecent exposure and were sentenced to time served, one was dropped, and two are pending.
A spokesman for Broward State Attorney Michael Satz confirmed "prosecution is warranted when an inmate exposes himself in plain view of the detention staff or others". He added: "Female detention deputies are human beings, too. Why should they have to view such vulgar and indecent behaviour in their place of work?" ®