Original URL: https://www.theregister.com/2006/03/13/dea_dragnet/

DEA dragnet hunts fugitive Larry Ellison

Distribution of cocaine rap shocker

By Lester Haines

Posted in Bootnotes, 13th March 2006 11:44 GMT

We were shocked this morning to learn that the DEA is hunting Larry Ellison on a distribution of cocaine rap.

The Ellison in question is a 6'1", 235lb black man, last seen in Philly. We were aware that plastic surgeons can work miracles, but this transformation is nothing short of astounding.

So, keep your eyes peeled and be aware that if you do spot this dangerous fugitive from justice:

Sound advice. This man may be armed, and is most certainly dangerous. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to Mike Knibb for alerting us to one of America's Most Wanted.