Cash'n'Carrion Well, UK satirical site The Rockall Times may be closed until 2 February for "refurbishment" (actually a new, all-singing, all-dancing CMS they tell us), but the site is still addressing some of the burning issues of our times.

Like smoking. There's been a bit of a rumpus this week, with stethoscope-wielding gangs of British doctors demanding a US-style ban on smoking in all public places.

It seems the Rockall boys are as taken with this entirely practical and intelligent proposal as they are with the government health warnings which now cover practically the entire outer surface of UK cigarette packets.

They are, however, not convinced that the warnings themselves were sufficiently hard-hitting to inform smokers of the real dangers of this filthy and anti-social habit. Sure, everyone knows that smoking causes impotence, cancer, stroke, heart attack and death, but did you know that:

That's right - the truth is shocking indeed. And to make sure this message is delivered with maximum impact, it is

on a premium-quality white cotton t-shirt for a nicotine-busting £12.76; (£14.99 inc VAT). Sizes range from medium to XXL.

The Rockall Times inform us that all proceeds from this and the remaining stocks of their Reg-sponsored "Rockall Britannia" shirt will fund not beer and, er, fags, but rather their new CMS. So, you can support web satire and fight the War on Smoking simultaneously at Cash'n'Carrion. Splendid. ®

Last order dates for pre-Xmas delivery

The last dates on which you can order from Cash'n'Carrion for pre-Xmas delivery are:

• UK: Thursday 18th December
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• Europe: Thursday 11th December
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• Rest of World: Sunday 7th December