Original URL: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2001/04/21/hello_john_want_a_new/

Hello, John, want a new fighter?

No flying car, but fast jets galore

By Lester Haines

Posted in Letters, 21st April 2001 14:17 GMT

Flights of fantasy

Kutty Chaathen thinks that we've been a bit frivolous over this flying car stuff:

Just a few points about the story in today's Reg. Nice story, brought a smile to an old man's face, but your general negative spin on the story wasn't so cheerily received

Typical of The Reg of late I thought, but I just had to contact you on your overzealous sarcasm, when you commented: "For a bit extra I can buy a Harrier jump-jet right now"

Excellent, if you could you give me the telephone number / email address / name of person or persons who will source you this bargain I would be eternally grateful. Since the Harrier is one of the aircraft I have the greatest difficulty in procuring.

I can "right now" offer you the technically inferior (and considerably cheaper) Dassault Mirage F.1C Fighter for a measly $9,400,000, excluding the relevant export taxes. I unfortunately don't supply "Sidewinders" even as an "optional extra", but we do include the Cyrano IV Radar system (which I just know you will need once you take to the skies)

If you consider $8,700,000 to be "a bit extra" and fancy one just drop me a line. I have access to six immediately and can locate three others if required. (All units are in superb condition, have ATAR 9K50-A60 engines and include full maintenance schedule logs.) Oh, you also have to prove you are a governmentally licensed arms distributor or entity, just a formality.

I think that $700,000 for a 400mph, 50,000ft ceiling hotol vehicle is quite reasonable. But then again, what do I know?

The bloke with the Harrier is Dave from Romford. Obviously, I can't give you his name but I can arrange a meet at the dog track if you want. A Mirage F.1C? You must be joking. Tell you what, I'll give you two hundred quid and you throw in a tank of petrol and some furry dice. Don't worry about the paperwork, if you know what I mean. Oh, I agree, $700,000 might be quite reasonable for the Moller X400. So, where's my nearest showroom?