Original URL: https://www.theregister.com/2000/11/24/we_are_slaves_to_technology/

We are slaves to technology – official

More speed, less haste

By Kieren McCarthy

Posted in Legal, 24th November 2000 15:08 GMT

New technology and sexy gadgets are making us less productive, more stressed and removing what little life we have left. Or so says a new survey by Priority Management.

The arrival of new bits of kit have caused us to throw time and work management skills out the window, found the company - which specialises in providing time and work management skills.

That's right, we are the "tech rich: time poor" generation. The 500 people quizzed were found to be busier than ever but were failing miserably to get the most out of hoarded new technology. A quarter of them said they were using the Internet/mobiles/PDAs just to keep up with the Joneses.

A hefty 92 per cent said they weren't using new technology to their maximum potential and 60 per cent admitted to feeling stressed three or more days a week. The survey concluded that all the techno garbage was making us miserable and ruining our social lives.

Helpfully, Priority Management has the solution and it comes in a 12-step plan. Beginning with "Start your day with a plan, not your e-mail", work your way through "Take a quiet hour" and end up with "Put your technology to the test", and suddenly the birds will start singing, the sky will be bluer and you'll get laid all the time.

Of course, we have our own pet theory. Yes, people are becoming more miserable and unhappy. Technology plays a part of course, but so does TV and mass consumerism. Here is our simpler 4-step plan:


  1. Talk to people for chrissakes. Don't live your life through the sodding TV. Go and meet up with mates or stay at home and talk with your family - and talk about something other than the TV. How about hopes/aspirations/feelings?
  2. Buying things will NOT make you happy. Honestly. Spend the money on activities or things you've always wanted to do. That is what money is for, don't you remember?
  3. A job is something you do to give you a focus and purpose in life. It also provides money which pays for your home and food and supports your family. The rest can then be used to make your life outside work more enjoyable (see point 2).
  4. Stop bloody whingeing all the time. No one likes moaners. And we just don't care if you're stressed or not - we're not you. So what's the point? Just get on and do it. And stop trying to find other things that you can blame for the fact that you're a whingeing, boring, overworked bastard.

There you go. Feel better? ®