Columnists

It’s DEJA VU: Customer forgets to tell us about essential feature AGAIN

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Been there, seen it, haven't done it
Alistair Dabbs, 25 Jul 07:01

Object storage adoption: Why, when, where… and, importantly, but

Comment Build a better interface and the world will... wait, where are you all going?
3

Being common is tragic, but the tragedy of the commons is still true

Worstall @ the Weekend Ostrom's work more than simply disproving Hardin
Tim Worstall, 19 Jul 07:00

Evil computers sense you’re in a hurry and mess with your head

Something for the Weekend, Sir? And printers play silly buggers for fun
Alistair Dabbs, 18 Jul 07:00

Time for a brutal TELLY-OFF: Android TV versus Firefox OS

Breaking Fad The fight for the living room's future is on
Steve May, 17 Jul 12:18

Game of Thrones: Where to now for headless Nintendo?

Game Theory Finding direction and picking an heir to the late Satoru Iwata
Mike Plant, 16 Jul 12:09

Columnist Roll

Alistair Dabbs

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Alistair Dabbs is a freelance technology tart, juggling IT journalism, editorial training and digital publishing.
Bank vault

Windows 10: Buy cheap, buy twice, right? Buy FREE ... buy FOREVER

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Microsoft wants to give me Windows 10 for free! Hooray for freebies! OK, some of my software no longer launches or works quite the way it’s supposed to, but I got used to that after upgrading to Windows 8, and then again with Windows 8.1. Free software, yay! Give it away, now! Youtube Video To be honest, I only thought about …
Alistair Dabbs, 01 Aug 2015

It’s DEJA VU: Customer forgets to tell us about essential feature AGAIN

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Déjà vu. I’ve just walked into the offices of a prospective new client for the first time and everything looks familiar, from the faux marble cladding and chromed door handles in the reception to the roughened white wallpaper and very specific shade of blue carpet tiles on the main floor. The Matrix - Déjà vu For all their …
Alistair Dabbs, 25 Jul 2015
2001: A Space Odyssey

Evil computers sense you’re in a hurry and mess with your head

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Error 51: Consult service manual. Error 51? Is that supposed to be a joke? I mean, it sounds like a bad pun on “Area 51”. Oh, those wacky error-message coders on the firmware development team, they kill me, they really do. Let’s try again. Print. Error 51: Consult service manual. Come on, come on, don’t give me that. …
Alistair Dabbs, 18 Jul 2015
"Composition with yellow, red, black, blue, and grey" by Piet Mondrian (1920)

What do you MEAN, 'Click on the thing which looks like a Mondrian?'

Something for the Weekend, Sir? A minicab driver is cross with me. As we swing around the tidy little streets of 60s-built suburbia, none of which look familiar, he fixes me in his rear-view mirror and snarls: “Don’t you know where you live?” Yes I do, I reply in calming tones, adding – less helpfully – it’s you who doesn’t know where I live. If I’m guilty …
Alistair Dabbs, 11 Jul 2015
Nikola Tesla's fake lightning, Recuerdos de Pandora on Flickr CC2.0 license

Let me PLUG that up there, love. It’s perfectly standaAAARGH!

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Want a new driveway? No problem, mate. Fix your garage door? Sorted. Oh, what, you want the the garage door to open on to the driveway? Oh no no no no, no can do, pal, that’s not done, they is sep’rate. Tell you what, though, I got a mate who could build you a shortcut so you can get the car from the drive to the garage through …
Alistair Dabbs, 04 Jul 2015
Darth Vader choking someone

That man told me to stuff a ROLE up my USER ENTRY!

Something for the Weekend, Sir? “Who are you, again?” Well, that’s just great. I’ve been talking to tech support customer services for barely two minutes and already he’s forgotten my name. To be honest, I can hardly blame him, considering my own inability to memorise names instantly, as recounted in this column many times. Tell me your name and within 10 …
Alistair Dabbs, 27 Jun 2015