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I need a password to BRAKE? What? No! STOP! Aaaargh!

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Welcome to the age of the self-crashing car
Alistair Dabbs, 22 Nov 07:00

Dragon Age Inquisition: Our chief weapons are...

Game Theory Bioware's fantasy forces in fine fettle
Lucy Orr, 21 Nov 11:48

'Cleantech' a dirty word for VCs? RUBBISH!

Worstall on Wednesday They just think the current schemes are terrible
Tim Worstall, 19 Nov 08:53

It’s PAYBACK time as HUMANS send a PROBE up ALIEN body

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
Alistair Dabbs, 15 Nov 07:02

Shoot to THRILL: Assassin's Creed: Unity and Halo: Master Chief Collection

Game Theory Is Ubisoft's bugfest really that bad?
Mike Plant, 14 Nov 12:46

Columnist Roll

Alistair Dabbs

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Alistair Dabbs is a freelance technology tart, juggling IT journalism, editorial training and digital publishing.

I need a password to BRAKE? What? No! STOP! Aaaargh!

Something for the Weekend, Sir? “Why are Volvos called Volvos? Because their drivers are cunts.” Youtube Video So pronounced one of my bosses in my student holiday job days, as he sat, Buddha-like, at the head of the baggage-handlers’ crew-room at Leeds-Bradford Airport, delivering his words of wisdom to a weary audience of one. I eventually learned that …
Alistair Dabbs, 22 Nov 2014
2001 HAL poster

It’s PAYBACK time as HUMANS send a PROBE up ALIEN body

Something for the Weekend, Sir? “We hit something the size of South London from ten years away.” Thus spake commentard Colin Ritchie the other day in response to The Register’s ongoing coverage of Rosetta’s extraordinary space odyssey. 2001: A Space Odyssey - The Monolith On The Moon The significance of such an achievement should not be underestimated. In the …
Alistair Dabbs, 15 Nov 2014
Moments of perspiration

Got a STRAP-ON? Remember to TAKE IT OFF at WORK

Something for the Weekend, Sir? As soon as I arrive at a client’s office, I take everything off. The scratchy, suffocating feeling produced simply by wearing stuff drives me to distraction, so whenever I get the chance, off it comes. Oh to feel the air on my skin... My clothes, you will be relieved to learn, remain distributed in rough approximation of current …
Alistair Dabbs, 08 Nov 2014

Me GIVE you $14 SQUILLION gadziddly-DILLION

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Youtube Video I wish to notify you that my Late client Late. Engr. Alberto Gruber made you a beneficiary to his WILL. He left the sum of Seventeen Million Two Hundred Thousand Dollars (US$17,200.000.00) to you in the codicil and last testament to his WILL. After many years of relative calm in my spam box, a slow but steady …
Alistair Dabbs, 01 Nov 2014
iPad Psycho image

SKYPE has the HOTS for my NAKED WIFE

Something for the Weekend, Sir? My wife is parading naked in front of a webcam again. Here's the funny thing, though: she doesn't even know that the webcam is on. In fact, it's not even her computer – it's mine – and she's not doing it deliberately. Come to think of it, I wasn't even aware that my webcam was on until just now when the green LED illuminated all …
Alistair Dabbs, 25 Oct 2014
The Queen Mother by Phil Houghton

Sign off my IT project or I’ll PHONE your MUM

Something for the Weekend, Sir? When you have to go, you have to go. And when you do, don’t rush it otherwise you can end up with damp socks… as my father-in-law discovered during a hurried slash-and-dash in a not-so-lonely lay-by one night. I might revisit that particular anecdote later. For the moment, I invite you to consider what the computer has brought …
Alistair Dabbs, 18 Oct 2014