Paul Kunert

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Paul Kunert is the editor of Channel Register

Former Intel EMEAR sales director takes Chipzilla to tribunal

Intel Corp's former Europe, Middle East, Africa, and Russia (EMEAR) sales director, who lost her job a year ago, is making an employment tribunal claim against the company which includes a series of accusations including sexual discrimination. Mary Guiney left the chipmaker in November 2016 and her case is to be heard at …
Paul Kunert, 15 Dec 2017
Sharp knife slices at a salami as previously sliced pieces lay on the chopping board. Photo by Shutterstock

IBM to expunge over 500 people in latest redundo round

Updated Almost 1,900 front line services personnel at IBM UK are at risk of redundancy and more than 500 of those will leave the company as part of the latest cost purge, multiple insiders have told The Register. This includes 1,118 heads at risk in IS Delivery (ISD), where IBM wants to ease one in three of them – 362 positions – out …
Paul Kunert, 11 Dec 2017
A large hand flicks an icon of a little red man. Image via shutterstock (Lasse Kristensen)

Cost-hurling IBM seeks more volunteers for employment bonfire

It wasn't only staff in IBM's Technical Services Support (TSS) unit that this week received the memo urging volunteers to come forward to toss themselves on the redundancy heap, folk in IS Delivery (ISD) got it too. Sources at IBM told us the only difference between the letters the departments received was the name of the …
Paul Kunert, 8 Dec 2017
Man hangs up desk phone after a clearly irritating call. Photo by Shutterstock

IT buyer? Had enough of pesky resellers cold calling? You aren't alone

IT buyers are pestered by between nine and 40 unsolicited sales calls from resellers each and every day, collectively wasting hours of their life that they’ll never get back. This was according to 60 per cent of 200 people questioned as part of a mini poll that was commissioned by, er, reseller Probrand. On average, these …
Paul Kunert, 7 Dec 2017
happy smiley ghost character

Meet the woman with a supernatural affinity for stiff lovers

It takes all sorts to make a world and some on the fringes of life often turn up on daytime TV. And so El Reg was fascinated by the story of Amethyst Realm, who dumped a human in the, er, physical realm to become a ghostbuster banger. Realm, a 27-year-old spiritual guidance consultant, told her tale of the lucky stiffs to …
Paul Kunert, 7 Dec 2017

IBM opens emergency escape hatch to TSS volunteers

IBM is seeking volunteers in Technology Support Services (TSS) to throw themselves down the redundancy chute by the end of the year. As revealed by The Reg last week, Big Blue’s UK top brass told staff to form a body of employees for both TSS and IS Delivery to represent the workforce as the latest round of layoffs take shape …
Paul Kunert, 7 Dec 2017

DXC Technologies UK boss QUITS

Just months after Nick Wilson landed in the UK hot seat at Frankenfirm DXC Technologies - the merger between CSC and HPE’s outsourcing division - he has quit, multiple sources have told The Reg. Wilson is understood to have resigned roughly a fortnight ago and to be working a six-month notice period. It is unlikely he is …
Paul Kunert, 7 Dec 2017
Cannabis leaves

O Christmas wreath, O Christmas wreath, thy potent skunk's in bunches

Nothing says Christmas like a wreath. Except of course a reefer wreath. But why stop at Jesus and Mary, when you can add a full ounce of Mary Jane, dressed with eucalyptus, wheat and rosemary that stoners can use to decorate their knockers this festivus. The seasonal arrangement, only on sale in Los Angeles, is the result of a …
Paul Kunert, 6 Dec 2017

VMware UK boss quits 'suddenly' – sources

VMware’s UK boss has insisted it was his decision to quit Virtzilla to pursue pastures new and spend more time with his young family. David Phull left VMware on Friday, but sources claimed he had meetings still booked in his diary and that his exit seemed abrupt, with no permanent replacement lined up. A spokeswoman at the …
Paul Kunert, 5 Dec 2017
Man sleeping at desk

Viagra's Irish plant STILL giving local men and dogs stiffies (not really)

The near two decade-old story that refuses to lie down aroused interest again at the weekend: folk from Ringaskiddy in rural Ireland complained once more that a nearby Viagra plant was still giving local men and, um, dogs a chubby. The village first popped up in 1998 when reports surfaced that the smell of chemicals used by …
Paul Kunert, 5 Dec 2017

Nationwide UK web bank and app take unscheduled nap

Updated Nationwide UK’s online presence is anything but this morning, what with an unspecified tech infrastructure glitch that has prevented customers across Blighty from logging into their accounts or using ATMs. Sorry, Internet Banking & the Banking app are currently unavailable. We’re working to get them back up and running ASAP. …
Paul Kunert, 4 Dec 2017
Burning a £20 note. Pic: Shutterstock

No 2017 bonus for you, HPE tells employees

Exclusive Thousands of employees at Hewlett Packard Enterprise will not be taking home a bonus after falling short of sales targets for fiscal 2017, The Register can reveal. HPE closed off the year ended October 31 with a 6 per cent drop in total revenue to $26.21bn. All of the major hardware units reported declines, professional …
Paul Kunert, 4 Dec 2017
empty_pockets_648

Freelance techies moan about DXC billing snafu: No pay for three weeks

Contractors plying their trade for DXC Technologies remain in the dark over what some claim is a billing system screw-up that has meant they'd gone unpaid for the past three weeks. The tech hands-for-hire told El Reg they were unable to input time sheets since November 11 on Beeline, the internal process used to manage third- …
Paul Kunert, 4 Dec 2017

Aviva dumps DXC, shoves data centre support at Atos

Exclusive Atos is lined up to replace DXC Technologies as the sole supplier of data centre hosting services to insurance giant Aviva when the existing deal times out in some 19 months. As El Reg exclusively revealed in November, Aviva was one of a number of customers that had decided to look for alternatives rather than renew contracts …
Paul Kunert, 1 Dec 2017
Auctioneer with hammer

Today is your last chance to pick up a piece of channel history

The old saying "a fool and his money are soon parted" clearly doesn't spring to mind as bidding starts to simmer on the Misco car registration plate that went under the hammer last week. As El Reg revealed, Misco Group's private equity backer Hilco Capital launched an online sale following the collapse of the reseller in …
Paul Kunert, 30 Nov 2017
Files in manager's desk drawers: manila folder marked "Redundancies". Image via shutterstock

Jingle bells, IBM tells more staff it is D-day ♫

IBM's Technology Support Services (TSS) teamsters in the Global Technology Services (GTS) UK division are braced for further job cuts as they enter yet another redundancy consultation process. Staff received the memo on Monday, the same day that Big Blue told its people working in the IS Delivery department, also housed within …
Paul Kunert, 29 Nov 2017
Galaxies stretching back into time across billions of light-years of space. The image covers a portion of a large galaxy census called the Great Observatories Origins Deep Survey (GOODS).

Stephen Hawking's boffin buds buy HPE HPC to ogle universe

Well, would ya look at that? Hewlett Packard Enterprise has retained a customer. Stephen Hawking's Centre for Theoretical Cosmology (COSMOS) has slurped the firm's latest data-crunching HPC system to better understand the universe. The Superdome Flex server was deployed eight days ago at the unit, part of the University of …
Paul Kunert, 28 Nov 2017

IBM does what IBM does best: Raises the chopper again

Exclusive With the wider ambition to base eight in 10 services personnel to lower-cost wage locations, IBM has commenced the latest job-cutting process in the UK and Ireland. Big Blue wrote to staff in the Global Technology Services division yesterday to warn of a 45-day consultation, indicating that at least 100 heads are going to roll …
Paul Kunert, 28 Nov 2017

Vanity, thy name is: M1SCO company car reg plates for sale

Whichever fool once proclaimed money can’t buy one class clearly wasn’t privy to the inventory of now defunct tech reseller Misco Group that was recently put up for sale by private equity backer Hilco Capital. The reseller, based in Wellingborough, England, went down in October after running out of cash and failed to find a …
Paul Kunert, 27 Nov 2017

Death, taxes, DXC job cuts: Three of life's sure bets

DXC Technologies is spreading some festive cheer by dangling voluntary redundancy (VR) terms in front of customer support teams, according to a confidential document seen by The Register. Peter Hands, UK and Ireland veep of the “deliver” division confirmed – for the second time in as many months – that DXC was seeking front …
Paul Kunert, 27 Nov 2017

SagePay's monster wobble... On the third day of sale week, UK retailers start to weep

What started as a Saturday afternoon nap for SagePay turned into a three-day snooze fest, angering retailers that were as of last night still struggling to process sales in a peak shopping week. The online payment service, which boasts about letting retailers get on with the business of retailing while it manages multi-channel …
Paul Kunert, 21 Nov 2017
bars broken in jail cell

UK private sector joins public in... Escape from DXC Max

Updated Insurer Aviva and energy supplier Centrica are the latest big customers to indicate plans to ditch outsourcing giant DXC Technologies, The Register can reveal. DXC, which is hell-bent on eking out $1bn in cost savings in its fiscal 2017, recently bemoaned contract run-offs after the UK Department for Work and Pensions refused …
Paul Kunert, 17 Nov 2017
Man bows head amongst piles of crumpled paper

DXC Tech asks staff to profile their skills

DXC Technologies employees fear a company request to profile their skills on a new management portal will be used by top brass to elbow them out of the door in the next round of compulsory redundancies. Staff were given two week deadline to complete their “individual profile” on the Saba Cloud, a new “skills management system …
Paul Kunert, 15 Nov 2017
Sharp knife slices at a salami as previously sliced pieces lay on the chopping board. Photo by Shutterstock

World Vasectomy Day: 15k men line up for live vent-blocking

SFW The Reg readership might be interested to know that the coming Friday does not just signal the end of the working week and time to cut loose, it is also World Vasectomy Day. WVD, to use the acronym, isn’t a new thing per se, it first started in 2013 to celebrate men around the world who are “stepping up for their partners, …
Paul Kunert, 15 Nov 2017
Tripping over

DXC spills AWS private keys on public GitHub

Miscreants racked up a $64,000 bill on DXC Technologies' tab after a techie accidentally uploaded the outsourcing firm's private AWS key to a public GitHub repo. It was red faces all round as the business opened up on the classic crypto key fumble in a PDF memo to staff, the contents of which were seen by The Register. " …
Paul Kunert, 14 Nov 2017

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