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Gareth Corfield

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Liquor bottle. Pic: Shutterstock

Today is the 211th anniversary of the Battle of Trafalgar

Today marks the 211th anniversary of the Battle of Trafalgar, in which Admiral Horatio Nelson gave the combined naval might of France and Spain a bloody good kicking. The battle was fought off Cape Trafalgar, near Cadiz in south-west Spain. Admiral Nelson's fleet of 27 ships comprehensively defeated 33 French and Spanish …
Gareth Corfield, 21 Oct 2016
Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain

Hack us and you're basically attacking America, says UK defence sec

Britain is splurging £265m on military cyber security – and that includes offensive capabilities, according to Defence Secretary Sir Michael Fallon. Speaking at the Royal United Services Institute yesterday, Sir Michael said the investment into the Cyber Vulnerability Investigations programme would “help us protect against …
Gareth Corfield, 21 Oct 2016
Boris saying 'I am invincible'! Pic: Eon Productions

Oh joy. You can now buy a gold plated quadcopter drone

Rich fools who like remote control toys can now splurge £20,000 buying a gold-plated DJI Phantom quadcopter, we are breathlessly told. Courtesy of Drones Direct, the remote-controlled drone is covered in 24 carat gold plate. In exchange for your 20 large you get the drone itself – branded theDJI Phantom 4 Gold Edition – the …
Gareth Corfield, 21 Oct 2016
Screengrab of a control room in new Royal Navy aircraft carrier. One of the screens sports unmistakable Windows XP desktop

Britain's fight to get its F-35 aircraft carriers operational turns legal

An earth-shaking blow has been struck in the never-ending battle to get Britain’s F-35 fighter jets and the Queen Elizabeth class aircraft carriers to sea: Whitehall has asked the Americans for legal help. Rather than getting help on kicking contractors’ backsides into gear so Britain actually has enough jets to send HMS Queen …
Gareth Corfield, 20 Oct 2016

Vodafone says it'll launch NB-IoT network in EU early next year

Vodafone has announced it will start rolling out its narrowband Internet of Things (NB-IoT) focused network in four EU countries from the start of next year – and folk across industry are rolling their eyes. NB-IoT is a low-power network aimed at devices such as smart meters. Vodafone has said it is wheeling out the new tech …
Gareth Corfield, 20 Oct 2016

'Doubly unacceptable' Swiss vegan forces his way into the army

A militant vegan has succeeded in forcing himself into the Swiss Army – and avoided paying extra tax as a result. Antoni Da Campo, a “strict vegan and member of Swiss animal rights organization PEA” had previously been rejected from the Swiss Army because the army would not cater for his vegan diet and because he refused to …
Gareth Corfield, 20 Oct 2016
Cat stares at vacuum cleaner robot. Photo by shutterstock

The Internet of Things is 'dangerous' but won't ride to the rescue

The Internet of Things is “dangerous”, according to some bloke trying to rebrand it as the “Internet of You” – and the government ain't going to pass new laws to sort it out. According to a press release, one Jim Hunter of Greenwave Communications quite rightly warned the Broadband World Forum this morning that putting …
Gareth Corfield, 19 Oct 2016
Cable confusion, image via Shutterstock

No, Russia is not tapping into Syria's undersea internet cables

Rumours abound on odder corners of the internet that a Russian signals intelligence ship has tapped into one of the main internet cables serving Syria. Sadly for the conspiraloons, it's almost certainly not true. Various tinfoil hat nutters on Twitter – and, rather embarrassingly, Vice Media's tech offshoot Motherboard – are …
Gareth Corfield, 19 Oct 2016
Sonar scan of German submarine UB-85 wreck

Soz, folklore fans! Negligence, not Nessie, sank WWI German sub

A sunken German submarine from World War One has been found at the bottom of the Irish Sea – and excitable folk are claiming the Loch Ness Monster sank it. The official story of UB-85's sinking, as logged by the crew of Royal Navy sloop HMS Coreopsis and reproduced on authoritative U-boat history website, is that she …
Gareth Corfield, 19 Oct 2016
The Microscope satellite. Pic: CNES / D.Ducros

Vodafone and Inmarsat hang satellites over potential Internet of Things customers

Vodafone and satellite phone firm Inmarsat have inked a deal to provide backhaul for Internet of Things devices in far-flung corners of the globe. According to this morning's Financial Times, the mobile network operator is seeking to expand into providing IoT connectivity for driverless cars, smart cities, smart farms and …
Gareth Corfield, 18 Oct 2016

Dell bundles bundle of systems-bundlers into its IoT van

The Dell EMC borg has chucked a slack handful of systems integrators into its Internet of Things Solutions Partner Program, it says. The routine business decision “is reflective of Dell’s effort to build a holistic ecosystem of IoT solutions that span industries” according to the usual burbling from Dell's PR speakers. The …
Gareth Corfield, 17 Oct 2016
Pic: Shutterstock

Drone idiots are still endangering real aircraft and breaking the rules

Drones are still presenting a haphazard hazard to British pilots, with four near-miss reports being made during a five-day period in June alone. Two near-misses occurred on 23 June, with the aircraft involved being a Boeing 747 and a light aircraft. In the case of the 747, its pilot reported seeing “a drone” while flying at …
Gareth Corfield, 17 Oct 2016
HMS Forth on her remote control trolley. Pic: BAE Systems

Puny human sailors still needed... until drone machine learning tech catches up

Drones won’t replace proper sailors anytime soon because, believe it or not, they need more manpower to operate, a Royal Navy admiral has insisted. Naval drones are “not about reducing the requirement for people”, Rear Admiral Paul Bennett told a press briefing attended by El Reg on Friday. Instead, they are for putting people …
Gareth Corfield, 17 Oct 2016

Drone exercise will transform future naval warfare, says Navy

The Royal Navy’s ongoing drone exercise Unmanned Warrior has been a “transformational opportunity”, Rear Admiral Paul Bennett said this morning. Admiral Bennett, assistant chief of the naval staff for capability, speaking via video link from Scotland, told a press briefing at the Centre for Maritime Intelligence Systems at …
Gareth Corfield, 14 Oct 2016
Group of young people yawning/looking bored. Photo by shutterstock

A robot kitchen? Whatever. Are you stupid enough to fall for this?

Are you the sort of gullible idiot with millions of pounds or dollars to splurge on a “robot kitchen”? No, us neither. Hey, when you have a vaporware “startup” offering something like this, what's reality got to do with it? Moley – for that is this startup's name – is punting a robotic kitchen, which it claims can rival …
Gareth Corfield, 13 Oct 2016
Johnnycab with Arnie. Screen shot from Total Recall

Without new anti-robot laws, humanity is doomed, MPs told

RotM Robots will destroy humanity unless we write new laws to control them, a UK Parliamentary committee has been told. “The key question is: if something goes wrong, who is responsible?” pondered the Commons Select Committee for Science and Technology, in a report released today. Microsoft's Dave Coplin, the firm's “chief …
Gareth Corfield, 12 Oct 2016
Her Majesty the Queen. Crown copyright/MoD

Queen Lizzie awarded good behaviour medal

Her Britannic Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second has been awarded the Long Service and Good Conduct medal for 65 years' military service without a criminal record. The news of Her Maj's gong, along with a similar one for her hubby Prince Philip, was rolled out in a government statement. Previously awarded to non-commissioned …
Gareth Corfield, 12 Oct 2016
Ronnie Barker and Tenniel Evans in The Navy Lark

Roboats hunt 'mines' and 'submarines' on Ex Unmanned Warrior

RotM The Royal Navy's Unmanned Warrior roboat exercise is currently taking place off the coast of Scotland. Featuring about 40 autonomous systems – mostly seaborne, though including a handful of aerial vehicles as well – the exercise is partially running alongside the main Joint Warrior tri-Service exercise. The Unmanned Warrior …
Gareth Corfield, 11 Oct 2016

Social media flame wars to be illegal, says top Crown prosecutor

Social media users who engage in flame wars or retweet the doxing of others will be treated in the same way as those making fake bomb threats over social media, British prosecutors have announced. Released this morning, the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS)'s latest “Guidelines on prosecuting cases involving communications sent …
Gareth Corfield, 10 Oct 2016

Devs! Here's how to secure your IoT network, in, uh, 75 easy pages

An in-depth security guidance report aimed at Internet of Things developers has been released by the Cloud Security Alliance. Titled Future-proofing the Connected World: 13 steps to developing secure IoT products, the report offers practical and technical guidance to devs trying to secure networks of IoT devices. “An IoT …
Gareth Corfield, 07 Oct 2016

Secure cloud doesn’t always mean your stuff in it is secure too

IPExpo “Picking a secure cloud partner is not as trivial as it may seem. Don't assume that because the cloud is secure, your business within the cloud is secure,” Unisys’ chief trust officer Tom Patterson said today. Alongside Patterson and giving a joint keynote speech about lowering costs and risks in the cloud this morning was AWS …
Gareth Corfield, 06 Oct 2016
Man wrapped in turqouise cable-knit blanket sips from hot drink - is clearly ill. Photo by Shutterstock

Internet of Things will turn up the compute heat for data centres

IPExpo The Internet of Things will put more demand upon mid-range and co-lo data centres, according to the marketing manager of data centre kit firm Minkels. Speaking at London’s IPExpo conference this morning, Minkels’ Niek van der Pas explained how, in his view, the explosion of IoT device usage will push more and more workloads …
Gareth Corfield, 06 Oct 2016
Parachutists and cloud image via Shutterstock

Trust the cloud, we’re getting the hang of securing it, says Unisys security chief

IPExpo Everyone’s starting to believe in public cloud but security remains an uphill battle, Unisys’ chief trust officer Tom Patterson told The Register this morning. “There are no four walls any more,” he said, sipping a cappuccino in London’s ExCel conference centre and referring to the traditional security model where threats were …
Gareth Corfield, 06 Oct 2016

What's not to love about IoT – you can spy on customers as they arrive

IPExpo Siloed databases will be the downfall of your Internet of Things venture, warned Avaya’s chief technologist Jean Turgeon on stage at IPExpo Europe today. Turgeon’s talk, titled IoT: Forget the hype, this is reality, didn’t really live up to the promise of its name, though he did make a few good points in amongst the subtle …
Gareth Corfield, 05 Oct 2016

Psst. Need some spy-on-employees tech? Ask Oriium

IPExpo Yorkshire-based "IT solutions" firm Oriium was hawking its CX:inSync spy-on-your-employees platform at ITExpo Europe today. Its cx:inSync product is sold as an endpoint device management solution. Its big selling point is the ability for network admins to implement deduplicated backups of end-user devices. Bundled with that …
Gareth Corfield, 05 Oct 2016