7th > March > 2014 Archive

P/2013 R3 breaking up

Hubble 'scope snaps 200,000-ton chunky crumble conundrum

Vid The Hubble space telescope has filmed strange asteroid P/2013 R3 disintegrating chunk by chunk as it screams around our Sun.

Who loves office space? Dell does: Virtualization to banish workstations from under desks

Dell, along with partners Nvidia and Intel, has opened a new center at its Austin, Texas, headquarters to make it easier for customers to deploy virtualized-workstation installations, and for ISVs to certify their software running on such setups.
Rik Myslewski, 07 Mar 2014
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Sony US PlayStation supremo Jack Tretton ejects after 19 years

Sony Computer Entertainment of America (SCEA) is parting ways with its longtime chief executive Jack Tretton: he will step down from his post and leave the company at the end of the month.
Shaun Nichols, 07 Mar 2014
VSAN Tweet GA week of
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Wanted: Virtual Steve Jobs to tell us one more thing about VSAN

It's a shame that VMware's VSAN launch didn't use Steve Jobs' trick of revealing “one more thing”, because there's one important detail missing from yesterday's event.
Simon Sharwood, 07 Mar 2014

Windows 8.1 Update 1 spewed online a MONTH early – by Microsoft

Early leaks of upcoming builds of Windows are common enough, but the latest leak of code purporting to be Windows 8.1 Update 1 comes from an unusual source – Microsoft itself.
Neil McAllister, 07 Mar 2014

I NEVER DONE BITCOIN, says bloke fingered by new Newsweek

A father of six living in Los Angeles County has denied he is Bitcoin creator Satoshi Nakamoto following a Newsweek cover story that claimed otherwise.
Shaun Nichols, 07 Mar 2014
management cloud2
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Om Nom Nom Nom: AWS to eat Windows Server 2012 VMs

Amazon Web Services' has added yet another feature, this time unveiling the ability to import and export Windows Server 2012 images to EC2.
Simon Sharwood, 07 Mar 2014
Traffic in Beijing during period of heavy pollution

China to blow away smog with DRONES

China is set to unleash a fleet of unmanned aerial vehicles to clear the smog from its skies as part of Beijing’s newly declared “war on pollution”.
Phil Muncaster, 07 Mar 2014
Borked computer keyboard
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Twelve million hit as Korea suffers ANOTHER massive data breach

The South Korean government was forced to launch an inquiry today after another massive data breach rocked the country, time the theft of account information belonging to 12 million customers of telco KT Corp.
Phil Muncaster, 07 Mar 2014

Zaphod Beeblebrox style third arm cyborg prosthesis unveiled

Yet another development ripped from the pages of that great work, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, has moved a large step closer to reality this week as a professor in the US reveals a special prosthetic arm which - rather than being intended solely to replace missing limbs - could be used instead to create "a three-armed cyborg".
Lewis Page, 07 Mar 2014
Oscar Mayer's Bacon Odour Dongle

Can you smell bacon? Yes! And it's coming from your iPhone!

US processed meat concern Oscar Mayer has brought the world a dongle that imparts the scent of bacon to the iPhone.
Simon Sharwood, 07 Mar 2014
Injustice - Gods Among Us
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comiXology's Phantom Zone breached by villainous Haxxor

E-comics outfit comiXology has written to customers advising them to change their passwords after “recent review and upgrade of our security infrastructure … determined that an unauthorized individual accessed a database of ours that contained usernames, email addresses, and cryptographically protected passwords.”
Simon Sharwood, 07 Mar 2014
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China bans TXTing and Tweeting in Parliament

Delegates at China’s largely ceremonial parliament, the National People’s Congress, have been warned to keep their smartmobes firmly in their pockets during the annual ten-day snoozefest meeting.
Phil Muncaster, 07 Mar 2014
Avere schematic diagram
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Avere gets edgy, speeds up flash flier filer

Avere produces clusterable FXT filer accelerators using tiering across RAM, Flash/SSD, fast SAS disk, and nearline SATA/SAS disks to accelerate access to file data from a filer behind it.
Chris Mellor, 07 Mar 2014
Canary Wharf at night

FCA drafts new rules to protect crowdfunders' lenders

Loan-based crowdfunding platforms will be required to hold a certain amount of capital in reserve to mitigate against the risk of their business failing and leaving lenders out of pocket, the UK's Financial Conduct Authority (FCA) has said.
OUT-LAW.COM, 07 Mar 2014

A potted history of cloud computing

Slideshow Slideshow
David Gordon, 07 Mar 2014

Ballmer: 'Microsoft would have a stronger position if I could redo the last TEN YEARS'

Quotw This was the week when MtGox finally admitted that it had probably lost all its Bitcoin investors' money, although it refused to give any definitive statements.
Psion Organiser II

Bugger the jetpack, where's my 21st-century Psion?

Way back in 2011 we covered a handy category of portable computer that has completely disappeared. The early A4 portables were a specialist item, much beloved of journalists but not a big hit with the wider world. It took a different design to win those hearts.
Liam Proven, 07 Mar 2014
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Nutanix photo-bombs VMware's selfie with delayed patent release

On 3 December, 2013, the US Patent And Trademark Office signed off patent 8,601,473, titled “Architecture for managing I/O and storage for a virtualization environment”.
Simon Sharwood, 07 Mar 2014

Why can’t I walk past Maplin without buying stuff I don’t need?

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Good news – after weeks of slaving over a seemingly interminable office refurb, occupying seven days a week and painstakingly documented in this column ad nauseam, I finally found some time to get some chores done.
Alistair Dabbs, 07 Mar 2014
balaclava_thief_burglar

British Pregnancy Advice Service fined £200k for Anon hack, data protection breaches

The British Pregnancy Advice Service (BPAS) has been fined £200,000 after a serious breach exposed thousands of people’s personal details to a malicious hacker.
John Leyden, 07 Mar 2014
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Violin CEO gazes at red-smeared accounts: Firm posts $149m loss

Incoming CEO Kevin DeNuccio has presided over Violin Memory's first quarterly results since assuming the hot seat and painted a real poor picture. The only way is up, right?
Chris Mellor, 07 Mar 2014
Woman looks immensely happy while staring into blank screen of unplugged monitor

Women! You too can be 'cool' and 'fun' if you work in tech!

Hey ladies! Did you know it's cool to work in tech? EU commish Neelie Kroes is here to tell you all about it, after a study claimed that the lack of women in ICT roles was costing the European Union billions of euros.
South Park: Stick of Truth

'Mommy got me an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000 for Xmas!' South Park: Stick of Truth

Game Theory Over the last few seasons South Park has become a bit of a stinker – and, more often than not, licensed video game adaptations are pretty whiffy too. When I first heard rumblings of South Park: The Stick of Truth I was dubious whether it would be any good, despite assurances that the production was being overseen by the creators of the animated classic.
Lucy Orr, 07 Mar 2014
New_Jawbone_man

How AGILE DIPLOMACY will spike PUTIN'S GUNS

¡Bong! One by one the faces in the Google Hangout flickered into life.
Steve Bong, 07 Mar 2014
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Northamber grabs ladder, claims PC market burning

Northamber's colourful chairman is forecasting a "more worthwhile future" - one that is less dependent on tech hardware - but the latest financials still bear the scorch-marks of attempts to put out its burning PC biz.
Paul Kunert, 07 Mar 2014

Privacy warriors lob sueball at Facebook buyout of WhatsApp

Privacy groups have filed with the US Federal Trade Commission to try to block Facebook's $19bn acquisition of WhatsApp until the social network comes clean on how it's going to use the personal data of the messaging service's 450 million users.
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Cops probing 'unnatural' death of Singapore Bitcoin exchange boss

Police in Singapore are investigating the "unnatural" death of of a virtual currency exchange boss.
Jasper Hamill, 07 Mar 2014
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Will the blighters pay this time? Betting big on developers

Comment Not too long ago, selling middleware and tools to software developers was a big business.
Michael Cote, 07 Mar 2014
padlock

Microsoft to push out penultimate XP patch on March Patch Tuesday

Microsoft plans to push out five bulletins - two of which cover critical flaws - as part of the March edition of Patch Tuesday.
John Leyden, 07 Mar 2014
Dolphins play in the water
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Brit and Yank data watchdogs ink deal to share case info

Britain's Information Commissioner's Office has inked a memorandum of understanding with bods at the US Federal Trade Commission to strengthen ties on probing outrageous online privacy howlers that happen across borders.
Kelly Fiveash, 07 Mar 2014
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High-end SAN peddler Dot Hill delivers profit – market says 'meh'

Three consecutive quarters of profit and a full year profit after seven years of losses: Dot Hill is looking good and CEO Dana Kammersgard can breathe more easily.
Chris Mellor, 07 Mar 2014

What do you mean there are no Surface Pros? HAND 'EM OVER, yell Microsoft resellers

Microsoft has yet to correctly forecast production of Surface Pro machines to match demand with supply, and shortages could continue into the summer.
Paul Kunert, 07 Mar 2014

Google's mystery barge flounces out of San Fran, heads to Stockton

Google's mysterious barge has dropped anchor at Stockton after it was forced to set sail from its former home in San Francisco.
Jasper Hamill, 07 Mar 2014
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Brit education tech supplier comes back to life after collapse

The company formerly known as Tribune Business Systems is about to be reanimated after Dubai-based investment firm VMS bought it out of administration in a classic pre-pack arrangement.
Paul Kunert, 07 Mar 2014

No sex please, we're Twit-ish. Vine bans non-educational nudity

A six second sexual encounter is bound to disappoint and annoy. So it's little wonder that the teeny-weeny video service Vine has called an end to them.
Jasper Hamill, 07 Mar 2014

Dell thuds down low-cost lap workstation for cheap frugal creatives or engineers

Dell has introduced an entry-level mobile workstation, the 15.6-inch Precision M2800, to fill the gap between business-level laptops and top-of-the-line mobile workstations such as the 17.3-inch Dell Precision M6800 and HP ZBook 17 Mobile Workstation.
Rik Myslewski, 07 Mar 2014

eBay stockholders! There's MORE to COME, thunders Carl Icahn

Activist investor Carl Icahn is continuing his campaign to get eBay to spin off PayPal, writing yet another letter to shareholders that said he hadn't even begun to fight to get his way.
Joe Tucci EMC
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Humdrum Documentum momentum makes EMC glum? Off alone into the scrum it should be spun

Blocks and Files An analyst at 451 Research has suggested EMC set its Information Intelligence Group and its Documentum software free by spinning them off or selling them.
Chris Mellor, 07 Mar 2014
Samsung 60nm 1Gb DDR 2 DRAM chip and DIMM

The long war on 'DRAM price fixing' is over: Claim YOUR spoils now (It's worth a few beers)

Remember getting hosed on those 128MB DIMM RAM sticks back in Y2K? Well, it's time to exact your revenge: with a $10 payout.
Shaun Nichols, 07 Mar 2014

The land of Milk and Sammy: Free music app touted by Samsung

Seeking to capitalize on its dominance of the Android smartphone market, Samsung has launched a free online streaming music service in the US that's only available to owners of its Galaxy-branded mobes.
Neil McAllister, 07 Mar 2014
International Space Station

Twin GEEKS: NASA studies identical brothers – one on Earth, one IN SPAAAACE

NASA on Friday announced a set of ten experiments designed to study the effects of spaceflight on the human body by comparing identical twins – one being up in space and the other down on Earth.
Neil McAllister, 07 Mar 2014

LOHAN chap hooks up with busty stratominx in cosmic pleasure cruise

NSFW vid The Register's Low Orbit Helium Assisted Navigator (LOHAN) team has expressed its shock and dismay that member Dave Akerman has chosen to play away from home with a lads' mag busty stratominx.
Lester Haines, 07 Mar 2014