Apple CEO: We've hoovered up your cash faster than ever before

Record sales of iPhone 6S, iPhone 6S Plus lead to avaricious Cook outburst

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Apple has sold more than 13 million new iPhones in just three days, the company crowed announced on Monday.

The new iPhone 6S and iPhone 6S Plus models went on sale on Friday and set a new record as fanbois scrambled to pick up their newest bauble.

“Sales have been phenomenal, blowing past any previous first weekend sales results in Apple’s history,” said CEO Tim Cook. “Customers’ feedback is incredible and we can’t wait to bring iPhone 6S and iPhone 6S Plus to customers in even more countries on October 9.”

The new phones will be available in 40 additional countries from October, including Austria, Belgium, Bosnia, Bulgaria, Croatia, the Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, Greece, Greenland, Hungary, Iceland, Ireland, Italy, Latvia, Liechtenstein, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Maldives, Mexico, Monaco, Netherlands, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Russia, Slovakia, Slovenia, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland and Taiwan, bringing the fruity firm’s world domination to 130 countries by the end of the year.

The new models run iOS 9, described modestly by Apple as “the world’s most advanced mobile operating system”, and feature new tools such as 3D Touch, which senses how deeply you press the display, and Live Photos, which allegedly “brings still images to life, transforming instants frozen in time into unforgettable living memories”.

According to the Apple gods, the iPhone 6S and iPhone 6S Plus also use the strongest glass of any smartphone (useful) and rose gold metallic finish aluminium, as used by the aerospace industry (arguably, less useful). ®


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