HP's great – I prefer it on bacon rather than my printer, though

Another week of your below-the-line asides and broadsides

CoTW What do you do when you find out someone's been shipping PCs with a series of critical flaws baked into the software on them? You blame Microsoft, of course, even though they were completely unrelated to anything that happened.

Bronze-badged 'tard Buzzword did just this after reading about Lenovo's Superfish scumware, which came to light earlier this week:

You wouldn't find this on an Apple computer, because a single company controls both the hardware and the software. Microsoft's reputation is being undermined by crap like this. They need to copy Apple and start shipping their own hardware.

Lots of downvotes helped the world tell Buzzword exactly what they thought of this rather silly suggestion.

Meanwhile, on the news that HP's management are getting ever more distant from each other ahead of the company's planned split later this year, this Anonymous Coward chipped in with a blinding insight:

I don't understand all the hateful comments about HP? I have to confess, I don't understand the ins and outs of the proposed split, but I LOVE HP. It's easily the best sauce on a bacon sandwich.

Good point, well made, nice use of colour. Personally we like ketchup, but each to his own.

In other news, Microsoft's patching system went titsup – again – last week. And silver-badged commentard hplasm said what we were all thinking ...

A patch that breaks Powerpoint? What's wrong with that?

Oh, we can dream.

The Wooden Twig of Fail

An Anonymous Coward decided it would be a "funny" thing (ho ho!) to post this somewhere on the site this week.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

No. Just no. 60 downvotes later, it's "no" from you lot too. Terrible, tedious and utterly unproductive – so thoroughly deserving of the Wooden Twig of Fail.

The Golden Vulture Dropping of Excellence

This week's best comment came in response to a public relations person unwisely wading into El Reg's comments section. The hapless PR, after reading that none of the links to Big Blue's latest product rebranding exercise were working, posted: "The link to the press release is working now. Warmly invite you to have a look-see." To which an Anonymous Coward shot back with this pearler:

I warmly invite you to get links working a nano-second or two before any announcement such as this. Basics, my lad, basics.

Bloody well said. We'd also encourage all PRs thinking of contacting The Register to read our 10 Top Tips For PRs before doing so.

Goodbye, print safely. ®

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