Feeds

REGULAR FISTING is GOOD for your HEALTH, says respected surveyor

Wagwan, bruv, come bump the rock with me like Ali G, init

Intelligent flash storage arrays

In the 21st Century it seems there are more ways to shake hands than there are Facebook gender categories (which number 56, if you're wondering). So what's an Englishman to do when faced with this breakdown of traditional decorum?

Boffins at Aberystwyth University have suggested you make like Ali G and master the art of the fist bump, which involves bumping your clenched fist against a chum's. It's healthier, apparently, and helps prevent the spread of mitt-borne bacteria like E coli.

Sadly though, new research from the survey bods at YouGov has revealed that British folk haven't taken to fist-bumping. Just two per cent of Blighty's residents employ this new-fangled form of greeting, compared to seven per cent of Americans.

Younger people (the filthy swines) are more likely to fist than grown-ups, with just 65 per cent using traditional handshakes compared to 85 per cent of the over-60s.

The popularity of punch-based greetings was boosted when Barack and Michelle Obama publicly fisted each other.

YouGov explained: "The fist bump has become politicised in the United States, where President Barack Obama, a Democrat, has made the fist bump part of his personal brand. A TV anchor's characterization of the president's gesture as a 'terrorist fist jab' was famously satirised on the cover of New Yorker magazine."

Republicans are particularly opposed to fist-bumping, with just three per cent using it versus nine per cent of Democrats.

This correspondent's last use of the fistbump technique came when he told a coffee shop worker about his penchant for a genre of aggressive British electronic music called grime.

"That is sick," the worker said with his mitt held aloft suggestively. "You don't look like a grime man."

Your scribe then awkwardly, yet affectionately, fisted the poor chap in front of all his colleagues.

El Reg doesn't like to quote the Khmer Rouge in diapers Wikipedia, but whilst the editor is looking the other way we'd like to draw your attention to its page dedicated to fist-bumping.

"A fist bump is also called dap, pound, fist pound, brofist, donsafe, spudding, fo' knucks, box, Bust, pound dogg, props, Bones, respect knuckles, bumping the rock, or knuckle crunching," its crowdsourced mob wrote.

"Ali G is regularly seen giving the greeting, which is popular amongst UK lovers of hip-hop culture, where it is also nicknamed 'nudging' and 'spudding'."

So now you know. ®

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Google's whois results say it's a lousy smut searcher
Run whois google.com or whois microsoft.com. We dare you, you PIG◙◙◙◙ER
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
prev story

Whitepapers

Driving business with continuous operational intelligence
Introducing an innovative approach offered by ExtraHop for producing continuous operational intelligence.
Why CIOs should rethink endpoint data protection in the age of mobility
Assessing trends in data protection, specifically with respect to mobile devices, BYOD, and remote employees.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Protecting against web application threats using SSL
SSL encryption can protect server‐to‐server communications, client devices, cloud resources, and other endpoints in order to help prevent the risk of data loss and losing customer trust.