Feeds

iPhone user SHAMEGASM: 'I beg of you', delete sex app from my purchase list

Quick, iVibe, before mum sees

Boost IT visibility and business value

The developer of a vibrator app has told guilty self-touching fanbois that it cannot wipe away their sinful past.

Users flocked to Apple's App Store to write five-star reviews of a free app called iVibe Massager. Only it seems they were not basking in post-orgasmic bliss, but wallowing in shame.

They tried to barter with the app's developer, Robot Mouse, offering to trade excellent reviews for a complete removal of the purchase from their iTunes history.

One wrote: "I saw this on a website with a friend and thought it was funny and she downloaded it and I don't want my parents to take it the wrong way!"

Since then though, the reviews seem to have disappeared. On the app store, the developers have also issued the following advice to guilty phone fiddlers:

"ATTENTION! If you wish to remove this app from your purchase list, please contact apple support. We have nothing to do with your purchase list and therefore CANNOT remove anything."

The iVibe app uses the iPhone and other mobiles into a "great personal massager" that can be used on "personal areas to spice up your life".

A picture of the begging reviews was posted on Instagram by someone called Lauren Greenberg, who describes herself with the words: "TV Writer. In a really good place emotionally."

Whilst some iVibe downloaders felt guilt, others felt no sensation at all due to iPhone's apparently limited vibrating capacity.

Here's what the expert self-pleasurers at a YouTube show called The Orgasm Challenge had to say about iVibe:

Apparently, the main problem with using an iPhone as a sex toy is "vagina dialling". If all this iMasturbing catches on, maybe Apple could rename its video-calling service SitOnMyFaceTime. ®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
NO MORE ALL CAPS and other pleasures of Visual Studio 14
Unpicking a packed preview that breaks down ASP.NET
Captain Kirk sets phaser to SLAUGHTER after trying new Facebook app
William Shatner less-than-impressed by Zuck's celebrity-only app
Apple fanbois SCREAM as update BRICKS their Macbook Airs
Ragegasm spills over as firmware upgrade kills machines
Cheer up, Nokia fans. It can start making mobes again in 18 months
The real winner of the Nokia sale is *drumroll* ... Nokia
Mozilla fixes CRITICAL security holes in Firefox, urges v31 upgrade
Misc memory hazards 'could be exploited' - and guess what, one's a Javascript vuln
EU dons gloves, pokes Google's deals with Android mobe makers
El Reg cops a squint at investigatory letters
Chrome browser has been DRAINING PC batteries for YEARS
Google is only now fixing ancient, energy-sapping bug
Google shows off new Chrome OS look
Athena springs full-grown from Chromium project's head
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Top 8 considerations to enable and simplify mobility
In this whitepaper learn how to successfully add mobile capabilities simply and cost effectively.
Application security programs and practises
Follow a few strategies and your organization can gain the full benefits of open source and the cloud without compromising the security of your applications.
The Essential Guide to IT Transformation
ServiceNow discusses three IT transformations that can help CIO's automate IT services to transform IT and the enterprise.