Feeds

'Executed ex' of Norkers' bonkers Kim Jong-un rises FROM THE GRAVE

Reports of Nork chanteuse's demise greatly exaggerated

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

We're delighted to announce that reports of the execution last year of North Korean chanteuse Hyon Song-wol appear to have been greatly exaggerated.

The former lover of Nork supremo Kim Jong-un was allegedly dragged before a firing squad along with fellow musicians on charges of "videotaping themselves having sex and selling the videos" and having "Bibles in their possession".

However, the North Koreans insist Hyon appeared alive and kicking at the at the "National Meeting of Artists" in Pyongyang last Friday, and have a video to prove it:

The blurb explains: "In 2013, a lot of western media reported false information about about the alleged murder of Hyon Song Wol, former singer of Pochonbo Electronic Ensemble and Wangjaesan Light Music Band.

"A milions of people believed that our government kills every single person for almost everything. Today, we're giving you a proof that Hyon Song Wol is ALIVE and that nobody was killed."

It chides: "See how you are being manipulated by western media and south Korean puppet regime, who is still giving false information about Democratic People's Repulic of Korea. Thruth will always win. No matter when."

In November last year, the international press followed its Hyon Song-wol explosive newsgasm by publishing unconfirmed reports that the Norks had topped 80 people for watching banned South Korean soap operas and smuggled DVDs of Desperate Housewives.

No doubt an official video of happy North Korean families enjoying unfettered access to Eva Longoria will surface in due course. In the meantime, cast you eyes over Hyon performing A Girl in the Saddle of a Steed, which demonstrates what attracted the Communist state's chubby tyrant to her in the first place:

®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Delaware pair nabbed for getting saucy atop Mexican eatery
Burrito meets soft taco in alleged rooftop romp outrage
Japanese artist cuffed for disseminating 3D ladyparts files
Printable genitalia fall foul of 'obscene material' laws
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
prev story

Whitepapers

Seven Steps to Software Security
Seven practical steps you can begin to take today to secure your applications and prevent the damages a successful cyber-attack can cause.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.
Consolidation: the foundation for IT and business transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.