Feeds

Huddled immigrant masses face 'British values' quiz

Never mind the bo**ocks, here's the new UK citizenship test

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Foreigners wishing to obtain a British passport will henceforth face a revamped citizenship test which "focuses on values and principles at the heart of being British".

According the BBC, the Home Office has dispensed with nonsense such as "information about water meters, how to find train timetables and using the internet". Instead, a new handbook designed to set wannabe Brits on the path to enlightenment ahead of their obligatory 45-minute exam highlights core values with posers such as: "What is the name of the admiral who died in a sea battle in 1805 and has a monument in Trafalgar Square, London?"

Other questions likely to pop up are: "What flower is traditionally worn by people on Remembrance Day?"; "The second largest party in the House of Commons is usually known by what name?"; and "From what age can you be asked to serve on a jury?"

Immigration minister Mark Harper declared: "The new book rightly focuses on values and principles at the heart of being British. Instead of telling people how to claim benefits it encourages participation in British life."

Unsurprisingly, opinion on the "radical" overhaul is divided. Don Flynn, head honcho at the Migrants' Rights Network, described it as "a big step backwards from the concerns with integration which the government is supposed to have in this area" and "more like an entry examination for an elite public school".

Speaking for the opposition, meanwhile, Labour's Chris Bryant used the announcement as an opportunity for the inevitable pop at Home Secretary Theresa May, who he reckons "should be focusing on fixing the big problems in her department not wasting time on rewriting the citizenship test".

MigrationWatch UK's Alp Mehmet, though, thinks the government is spot on with the "underlying principle and thought process" behind the move.

Red-top The Sun seems equally happy with the new test, and has suggested a few questions of its own. These include "What should you never mind if you're a Sex Pistols fan?", and it's fair to say that if citizenship hopefuls can't answer that testicular teaser, or are unaware that Brian is a "very naughty boy", then there's no place for them in this scepter'd isle. ®

Bootnote

We're sure readers can come up with their own questions highlighting the "values and principles" of Britishness. Our suggestion is: "At which supermarket chain can you get 24 cans of superstrength fighting lager for a fiver?"

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
Swiss wildlife park serves up furry residents to visitors
'It's ecological' says spokesman, now how would you like your Bambi done?
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug
US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention contacted as site supremo coughs up
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
ePassport to Transnistria: NEXTIFYING the Nation State with BONG
Hey the Man, you can't geoblock distributed democracy
Red Bull does NOT give you wings, $13.5m lawsuit says so
Website letting consumers claim $10 cash back crashes after stampede
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Trolls have DARK TETRAD of personality defects, say trickcyclists
Think psychopathy and BDSM dungeons, not desktops
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
prev story

Whitepapers

Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Win a year’s supply of chocolate
There is no techie angle to this competition so we're not going to pretend there is, but everyone loves chocolate so who cares.
Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.