Japanese toilet can save penalty kicks
Bring on the Germans...
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Just when you thought Japan had moved on from its stereotyped image as a nation that creates bizarre, useless technology, it comes up with the Super Great Toilet Keeper (SGTK) – a bespoke toilet designed to save penalties.
The football-mad throne is a bizarre, one-off collaborative project between Japan’s leading toilet-maker Toto and a national football pools biz of the same name.
As this impressive YouTube clip shows (embedded below, too), the SGTK can save penalties propelled by professional players at 160km/h.
The technology behind the lithe loo is said to have the following qualities:
The SGTK developed by us can calculate the final destination of the ball in under 0.1 seconds, with an independently developed motion analyser using two high speed 250 frames-per-second cameras. Within 0.1s it then tilts with its ultra high-speed motor and shoots a ball out using Gadget Inc’s powerful spring system.
The sight of a keeper/khazi shooting a small ball at high speed out of its bowl is enough to give even the biggest football fans a slight sense of forboding next time they are caught short, but it's still probably more useful than Toto's last effort - the Toilet Motorcycle.
The SGTK is labelled as a “Green Collaboration project”, with little else by way of explanation, but then when you’ve got a WC that can save balls travelling at 160km/h, who needs an explanation?
According to Japan Daily Press, an SGTK will set you back around 600,000 yen (£4,687) – around a thousandth of England goalkeeper Joe Hart’s annual salary – and offers probably the best chance of success in a major footballing tournament since 1966. ®
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COMMENTS
The difference between 'merkins and Japanese
Japan: toilet-maker produces something hi-tech, completely useless but fun.
USofA: similar technology but instead of a toilet-maker it's DARPA, Raytheon or such and instead of completely useless it's a new, creative way of killing people. And instead of fun, well it's still fun, but...
So...
... You're sitting on the loo, minding your own business and one of your "mates", for a laugh, kicks a ball under the loo door...!!!

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