Feeds

Catapults, subsidies, and benefits: Bongonomics explained

Our VC's on FIRE at Burning Man and the Paralytic Games

Security for virtualized datacentres

Paralytics

I shall confess the real reason I have spent a couple of silent weeks since my triumphant Olympic Opening Ceremony: it's one of logistics. I haven't been able to get to the Bong Ventures HQx in Shoreditch. Literally.

The Bong Ventures loft complex normally provides a laidback and congenial co-working hub for my start-ups. But for the past month it's been chaos. I've had guys in wheelchairs throwing things at each other, and one particularly scary dude who is half-man, and half a gigantic-spring, vaulting through the ceiling. It's caused havoc with my feng shui and there are broken bottles of Puyehue water everywhere.

Nobody told me that after the Olympics was over, there would be another games festival - this time for people on Sickness and Invalidity Benefit. And nobody thought to tell the Bongster that Bong Ventures HQ had been designated as a training camp. What the FUCK?

This is doubly embarrassing, not just because of my long and mutually fruitful relationship with LOCOG as social branding enforcement consultant, but because I have been doing some strategic consulting for a fine outfit called Atos. Atos performs a vital role in ensuring that Catapults which should rightfully go to start-ups in Shoreditch are not being frittered away on spongers.

So far the Incapacity Benefits claimants haven't found the iPad app we developed for Atos, which creates a mobile geolocation-aware Benefit Integrity Centre for inspectors which is fully Retina Display™-capable.

Look, I'm as compassionate as the next Shoreditch Venture Capitalist, but unless you can make a meaningful contribution to the Post-Profit Economy, such as being able to write a social media engagement strategy, and show some real Hashtag-Traction, then it's money down the drain. You have to earn your keep. It's called tough love.

Bong Out. ®

on Twitter

Steve Bong is the founder of Bong Ventures, an early stage investor and incubator focussing on innovative new technology startups based in Shoreditch, London. He enjoys parties, foreign travel, Open Data and draws his inspiration from Ayn Rand and His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama. He advises No.10 policy guru Rahul Sativa on mindfulness and innovation, Mark Zuckerberg on the Perfect IPO, LOCOG on brand enforcement, and imagineered the Olympic Opening Ceremony with Danny Boyle.

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Facebook pays INFINITELY MORE UK corp tax than in 2012
Thanks for the £3k, Zuck. Doh! you're IN CREDIT. Guess not
Google Glassholes are UNDATEABLE – HP exec
You need an emotional connection, says touchy-feely MD... We can do that
Just don't blame Bono! Apple iTunes music sales PLUMMET
Cupertino revenue hit by cheapo downloads, says report
US court SHUTS DOWN 'scammers posing as Microsoft, Facebook support staff'
Netizens allegedly duped into paying for bogus tech advice
Feds seek potential 'second Snowden' gov doc leaker – report
Hang on, Ed wasn't here when we compiled THIS document
Verizon bankrolls tech news site, bans tech's biggest stories
No agenda here. Just don't ever mention Net neutrality or spying, ok?
Inside the EYE of the TORnado: From Navy spooks to Silk Road
It's hard enough to peel the onion, are you hard enough to eat the core?
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
The Heartbleed Bug: how to protect your business with Symantec
What happens when the next Heartbleed (or worse) comes along, and what can you do to weather another chapter in an all-too-familiar string of debilitating attacks?