Feeds

Churlish HSBC drops atomic-scale accuracy

Your nearest tentacle now to within 1 mile

Security for virtualized datacentres

International banking monolith HSBC has rather churlishly reprogrammed its magnificent "Find your nearest branch" service so that customers are no longer given the distance to their closest tentacle to within a couple of quarks.

Last week, we discovered that Vulture Central and HSBC's Gerrard Street branch were separated by exactly 0.10956224649966498 miles:

HSBC branch search shows accuracy to 17 decimal places

However, following what we imagine was a fraught crisis meeting at the highest levels of the company, conducted behind closed doors as panicked execs pondered Powerpoint doomsday presentations of the potential impact of sub-atomic accuracy on the bank's share price, this is how far it now is from El Reg to Gerrard Street:

Distance to Gerrard Street branch of HSBC now 1 mile

For shame. We're sure those of you who like to know your proximity to a cash machine to the nearest femtolinguine will join us in protesting this outrageous jiggery-pokery. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to Douglas de Lacey for the update.

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
Microsoft on the Threshold of a new name for Windows next week
Rebranded OS reportedly set to be flung open by Redmond
Business is back, baby! Hasta la VISTA, Win 8... Oh, yeah, Windows 9
Forget touchscreen millennials, Microsoft goes for mouse crowd
SMASH the Bash bug! Apple and Red Hat scramble for patch batches
'Applying multiple security updates is extremely difficult'
Apple: SO sorry for the iOS 8.0.1 UPDATE BUNGLE HORROR
Apple kills 'upgrade'. Hey, Microsoft. You sure you want to be like these guys?
ARM gives Internet of Things a piece of its mind – the Cortex-M7
32-bit core packs some DSP for VIP IoT CPU LOL
Lotus Notes inventor Ozzie invents app to talk to people on your phone
Imagine that. Startup floats with voice collab app for Win iPhone
'Google is NOT the gatekeeper to the web, as some claim'
Plus: 'Pretty sure iOS 8.0.2 will just turn the iPhone into a fax machine'
prev story

Whitepapers

A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Beginner's guide to SSL certificates
De-mystify the technology involved and give you the information you need to make the best decision when considering your online security options.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.