Feeds

Santa's Xmas Caper

Jingle bell-end?

Top three mobile application threats

Bad Santa

There are some things I like about this game but that doesn’t make it good. Let me make it clear: I AM NOT SAYING THIS IS A GOOD GAME. But even as a veggie of 20 years standing, I chuckle at turkey drumstick helicopters.

Santa's Xmas Caper

The moon look's as depressed as I feel playing this festive tosh

Over seven levels - because, seriously, who wants more than seven levels of Christmassy torment? - I play a snowball-throwing substitute Santa. My supposed helpers, those pesky Elves, have decided to start a Christmas rebellion - “Occupy Lapland”, anyone? - and they have turned Christmas against me!

Before I can get back to Mrs Santa for some Christmas Pie I am going to have to swallow a lot of Christmas clichés.

Santa's Xmas Caper

Run, fat boy, run

Hopping over presents while avoiding sinister bloated perfume bottles and strange evil jellies, I am mesmerised by the complete lack of coherence in level design or even a sense of where this game is going.

The graphics could, loosely, be defined as cute but on closer inspection are actually quite menacing. I suspect these moons with Me Gusta faces will swim before me in the work Christmas party punch.

Santa's Xmas Caper

'I sense your presents'

I almost have no control of my movement as my stunted Santa decides to miss jumps and fall prey to an otherworldly and malevolent gravitational pull.

I think my reward on finishing Santa's Xmas Caper is an apocalyptic portent of the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come:

“Congratulations you have completed the game. Game over.” ®

Developer Zeppelin Games
Year of release 1992
Platforms ZX Spectrum, Amstrad CPC, Commodore 64
More Info Santa's Xmas Caper is unsurprisingly available cheap on eBay

More Retro Games

Rainbow
Islands
Doom Lemmings Flashback:
The Quest for
Identity
X-COM UFO:
Enemy Unknown

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

More from The Register

next story
Feast your PUNY eyes on highest resolution phone display EVER
Too much pixel dust for your strained eyeballs to handle
Samsung Galaxy S5 fingerprint scanner hacked in just 4 DAYS
Sammy's newbie cooked slower than iPhone, also costs more to build
Microsoft lobs pre-release Windows Phone 8.1 at devs who dare
App makers can load it before anyone else, but if they do they're stuck with it
Report: Apple seeking to raise iPhone 6 price by a HUNDRED BUCKS
'Well, that 5c experiment didn't go so well – let's try the other direction'
Rounded corners? Pah! Amazon's '3D phone has eye-tracking tech'
Now THAT'S what we call a proper new feature
Zucker punched: Google gobbles Facebook-wooed Titan Aerospace
Up, up and away in my beautiful balloon flying broadband-bot
US mobile firms cave on kill switch, agree to install anti-theft code
Slow and kludgy rollout will protect corporate profits
AMD unveils Godzilla's graphics card – 'the world's fastest, period'
The Radeon R9 295X2: Water-cooled, 5,632 stream processors, 11.5TFLOPS
Sony battery recall as VAIO goes out with a bang, not a whimper
The perils of having Panasonic as a partner
NORKS' own smartmobe pegged as Chinese landfill Android
Fake kit in the hermit kingdom? That's just Kim Jong-un-believable!
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a defence for mobile apps
In this whitepaper learn the various considerations for defending mobile applications; from the mobile application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies needed to properly assess mobile applications risk.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.