Feeds

Erotica 2011 stands firm against rise of the sex machines

Old-school tools hit of leather and vibes bash

Gartner critical capabilities for enterprise endpoint backup

The 'interactive' fleshlight

Last up, and scariest of all, are the simulated touch mechanisms. One seriously hyped – but so far quite successful – incarnation of this technology is the Real Touch, billed as "teledildonics from a former NASA engineer".

One end of this device hooks into your PC's USB port, where it syncs with your choice of videos: the other end wraps itself lovingly around your private parts and then... allows you to simulate having sex with the porn star of your choice. So long as nothing shorts out – or catches fire!

If that sounds a little direct, simulated touch technologies – from body suits to nerve implants – are emerging on an almost daily basis, allowing wearers to experience anything from a full-on sexual encounter, to a gentle touch on the forearm.

Does this need spelling out? Put it all together – automation, teledildonics, artificial touch – and some folks may never leave the house again.

Sadly, though, if you are looking for the latest developments in this area, Erotica is probably not the place for you. Instead, you might consider Arse Elektronika, an annual conference on sex and sexual technology, taking place in San Francisco. Too late for this year ... maybe next. ®

Next gen security for virtualised datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE
Examining the frothy disconnect in indie cafe culture
Ex-Apple man Sam Sung - for it is he - sticks namebadge on eBay
Stump up via tat bazaar, do a good thing for ill kids
Check your Clungene, Irish women warned
Have a quick shufti, you may not be pregnant after all
prev story

Whitepapers

5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup
IT departments are embracing cloud backup, but there’s a lot you need to know before choosing a service provider. Learn all the critical things you need to know.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.
Rethinking backup and recovery in the modern data center
Combining intelligence, operational analytics, and automation to enable efficient, data-driven IT organizations using the HP ABR approach.
Next gen security for virtualised datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.