Feeds

Pakistan bans rude text messages

'Fondleslab' is offensive apparently

Build a business case: developing custom apps

Text messaging has long been derided for diminished linguistic skills and increased profanity, especially among yoof.

In a bid to tackle the issue, officials in Pakistan have forced mobile operators to block all texts that feature specific offensive words.

The country's telecoms regulator, the Pakistan Telecomminication Authority, has produced a list of more than 1000 words and phrases that operators must look out for, The Guardian reports.

We're not just talking F-bombs, C-nuts and other usual suspects. Seemingly inoffensive words such as "flatulence", "deposit" and "fondle" are also on the censor's list. Residents better not brag about playing with their fondleslabs over there, then.

Obscure phrases like "flogging the dolphin" and "pocket pool" have been barred too, along with terms like "strap-on", "crotch-rot" and "beat your meat".

iPhone censored

Watchdog director Muhammad Talib Doger wrote to the country's various mobile operators insisting "the system should be implemented within seven days... and a report submitted to PTA on monthly basis on the number of blocked SMSs".

Attached to the letter was a list of 1109 English phrases - and 586 more in Urdu - which the PTA wants banned. Even more are apparently facing the chop in the near future. WTF?

While it will be hard to completely restrict the use of every phrase, operators expect fines should they not comply.

It's probably about time the folk in Pakistan started downloading the Viz Profanisaurus app. Surely the watchdog will struggle to stop people asking if the wife fancies a "Dutch oyster" later as one's "trouser truncheon" needs a good "snake charm". You never know, though. ®

The essential guide to IT transformation

More from The Register

next story
Reg man looks through a Glass, darkly: Google's toy ploy or killer tech specs?
Tip: Put the shades on and you'll look less of a spanner
So, Apple won't sell cheap kit? Prepare the iOS garden wall WRECKING BALL
It can throw the low cost race if it looks to the cloud
One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot
Latest cleaner available for world+dog in September
Samsung Gear S: Quick, LAUNCH IT – before Apple straps on iWatch
Full specs for wrist-mounted device here ... but who'll buy it?
Apple promises to lift Curse of the Drained iPhone 5 Battery
Have you tried turning it off and...? Never mind, here's a replacement
Now that's FIRE WIRE: HP recalls 6 MILLION burn-risk laptop cables
Right in the middle of Burning Mains Man week
Apple's iWatch? They cannae do it ... they don't have the POWER
Analyst predicts fanbois will have to wait until next year
Tim Cook in Applerexia fears: New MacBook THINNER THAN EVER
'Supply chain sources' give up the goss on new iLappy
HUGE iPAD? Maybe. HUGE ADVERTS? That's for SURE
Noo! Hand not big enough! Don't look at meee!
prev story

Whitepapers

Top 10 endpoint backup mistakes
Avoid the ten endpoint backup mistakes to ensure that your critical corporate data is protected and end user productivity is improved.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Backing up distributed data
Eliminating the redundant use of bandwidth and storage capacity and application consolidation in the modern data center.
The essential guide to IT transformation
ServiceNow discusses three IT transformations that can help CIOs automate IT services to transform IT and the enterprise
Next gen security for virtualised datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.