Feeds

Naked vegans target Prince Harry over meaty 12-incher

Activists offer royal chopper ace spicy veggie free night out

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Exclusive Animal rights group Peta has despatched a brace of near-naked operatives to Arizona in a bid to lure Prince Harry away from the delights of meat.

The less-than-covert insertion of the pair of barely covered activists will cause yet more distraction for right royal playboy and his retinue, as Harry attempts to complete his chopper weapons training in peace.

The Mayor of Gila Bend, where Harry is undergoing his final phase of training, reportedly warned the partying Wales off fornicating with the local maidenry before saying he'd been misquoted and offering Harry a pizza and beer summit instead.

Harry had already enjoyed the delights of Gila Bend's Little Italy Restaurant, where he reportedly enjoyed the Meat Lover's pizza, replete with majestic amounts of bacon, ham, Italian sausage and pepperoni, leaving at least one waitress panting with gratitude.

However, animal rights org PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) is now seeking to dissuade Harry, and the residents of Gila Bend, from consuming carcass-based protein.

To this end, they have sent in a pair of "sexy señoritas" in chilli-pepper bikinis who openly invited the prince to a "spicy" night out in Gila Bend.

peta ops outside gila bend

For the benefit of the royal protection squad...

The pair are also handing out copies of the organisation's vegetarian and vegan starter pack to local residents.

While pushing the claimed benefits of relieving animals from suffering in farms, abattoirs and fishing boats, the highly toned operatives will also be telling Harry and anyone else who will listen that: "Eliminating meat and other animal-derived products from your diet can also lead to a sizzling physique and plenty of heat in the bedroom."

This isn't the first time PETA have targeted the Wayward Prince Wales. They've previously called on him to give up his favourite birthday treat of shooting birds, to no avail.

We think they might be onto a loser in persuading Harry to lay off the meat and birds. However, it's just possible they could distract him long enough to protect the girls of Gila Bend from any regal fornication.

peta ops and gila bend plane

Two girls, one militaristic phallic symbol

®

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it
Fondleslab-friendly beastie's wake spotted... OR WAS IT?
Japanese boffin EYES up big bucks with strap-on digi-glasses
AgencyGlass saddles user with creepy OLED display
Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet
UAVs likely to have been made in the Middle Kingdom
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Dorian Nakamoto gets $23,000 payout over Bitcoin invention saga
Maintains he didn't create cryptocurrency, but will join community
Pirate Bay's 10 millionth upload: Colour us shocked, a SMUT FLICK
P2P badboys show online piracy is alive and humping
Teen girl arrested with 70-year-old man's four inch weapon inside her
Charged with introducing .22 snubbie to penile facility. It wasn't firing blanks
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
prev story

Whitepapers

Mobile application security study
Download this report to see the alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, as well as the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.