Feeds

Prince Harry given free run of Arizona town's womenfolk

'Thank you,' pants ecstatic waitress

Intelligent flash storage arrays

Prince Harry has been given the green light to deflower the maidens of a small US town, after the town manager explained reports Cap'n Windsor had been warned off "fornicating" as "a total fabrication".

The UK tabs were cock-a-hoop yesterday about reports that the mayor of Gila Bend, where Harry is completing a weapons course, had warned the wannabe chopper pilot away from the town's womenfolk.

While Gila Bend is miles away from anywhere in the Arizona desert, the townsfolk were clearly familiar with old English customs such as droit de seigneur, and were already loading their shotguns to fend off the famously rambunctious royal.

"Some of the dads won’t take too kindly to a prince fornicating the night away and drinking into the small hours," Mayor Ron Henry reportedly said. "It is a very quiet town with a lot of good Christian people. This isn’t a party town.”

He also said, somewhat cryptically, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and we have some very pretty girls here."

However, according to the Daily Beast/Newsweek, the reports are "a total fabrication".

“The mayor is very upset about all this," town manager Rick Buss told the Beast. "We’re honoured to have the prince here, and we will respect his privacy.”

Buss said it was the reporter who'd brought up the subject of "fornicating" in a chat with the trusting mayor. "The reporter started asking him things like, ‘Oh, what about if Prince Harry went chasing after one of your daughters?’”

As it happens, Harry appears to have already had a taste of the local delights, already leaving one local girl gasping: "Thank you, and thank you for choosing this place to come and eat."

In fact, said Josie Villagas, a waitress at Gila Bend's Little Italy Restaurant, Harry said it was "the best pizza to eat in the world". ®

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

More from The Register

next story
MEN: For pity's sake SLEEP with LOTS of WOMEN - and avoid Prostate Cancer
And, um, don't sleep with other men. If that's what worries you
Jim Beam me up, Scotty! WHISKY from SPAAACE returns to Earth
They're insured for $1m, before you thirsty folks make plans
Now: The REAL APPLE NEWS you need to know
OMG! Gravity's totes amazeballs. Calm down, George Clooney, not your film
Boffins who stare at goats: I do believe they’re SHRINKING
Alpine chamois being squashed by global warming
Let's make an app that POSTS your POO to APPLE HQ
Plus: It's OPEN WARFARE in the Linux greybeard world
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
Adorkable overshare of words like photobomb in this year's dictionaries
And hipsters are finally defined as self-loathing. Sort of
Not a loyal follower of @BritishMonarchy? You missed The QUEEN*'s first Tweet
Her Maj opens 'Information Age' at the Science Museum
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile
Data demand and the rise of virtualization is challenging IT teams to deliver storage performance, scalability and capacity that can keep up, while maximizing efficiency.
Mitigating web security risk with SSL certificates
Web-based systems are essential tools for running business processes and delivering services to customers.