Feeds

Ohio man cuffed for shagging inflatable pool raft

Pink, bouncy victim abducted in back-alley tryst

Seven Steps to Software Security

The grandmother of an Ohio man with a serious penchant for plastic has suggested her grandson needs urgent help after he was cuffed earlier this week for engaging in "sexual activity" with a pink inflatable swimming pool raft.

Edwin Charles Tobergta, 32, had already been arrested five times on public indecency charges when cops slapped on the bracelets after he was spotted getting down and dirty with the inflatable in Harmon, roughly 20 miles south of Akron.

The owner of the raft clocked Tobergta in an alleyway having his evil way with the pink pool accessory, and shouted at him to knock it off, at which point the perp took to his heels, taking his synthetic lover with him.

Cops finally caught up with him at his home, where he "admitted to the crime and begged for help", according to the police report.

The rap sheet explains: "Defendant advised officers that he was doing it but only because he has a problem and that he needs help and please don't send him to prison but send him somewhere to get help."

The plastic lover's gran, Linda Tobergta, claimed the poor bloke is suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder, and that the family's attempts to get him treatment had come to nothing. She said: "He has a lot of mental problems and he's always had a fascination for plastic. That's just it. That's all of it. We never could get the proper care for Edwin. It's like nobody cares."

Regular readers will note with interest that this is the second time we've been able to deploy the "Ohio man cuffed for shagging [insert object]" headline formula. Back in 2008, another Ohio man was cuffed for shagging a picnic table. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to Pat Coughlin for the tip-off.

Seven Steps to Software Security

More from The Register

next story
Delaware pair nabbed for getting saucy atop Mexican eatery
Burrito meets soft taco in alleged rooftop romp outrage
Japanese artist cuffed for disseminating 3D ladyparts files
Printable genitalia fall foul of 'obscene material' laws
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Apple: No, China. iPhone is NOT public enemy number 1
Beijing fears it could beam secrets back to America
Canuck reader threatens suicide over exact dimensions of SPAAAACE!
How many As? Reg hack's writing cops a shoeing
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
The Essential Guide to IT Transformation
ServiceNow discusses three IT transformations that can help CIO's automate IT services to transform IT and the enterprise.
Mobile application security vulnerability report
The alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, and the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
Consolidation: the foundation for IT and business transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.