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Greyhound spatters Nashville with semen

Emergency cleanup as considerable ½-litre wad splurged

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A Greyhound bus caused a bit of a rumpus in Nashville earlier this week when it lost its considerable load of bull semen.

The vehicle was negotiating a curved on-ramp to the Interstate 65 at around 5am when it discharged four canisters of frozen taurine oysters. The bus went merrily on its way, unaware it had bust a nut.

Police and fire services were alerted to a "foul odour" at the scene, and discovering the malodorous quartet of steaming containers, closed the on-ramp and called for HAZMAT back-up.

Bus tickets found at the scene pointed to Greyhound involvement, and the authorities managed to raise the driver, who clarified the canisters were filled with nothing more harmful than "straws of frozen sperm packed in liquid nitrogen".

After a quick bit of mopping up, the on-ramp was reopened by 9am.

A Greyhound spokesman noted it was "not uncommon that the bus was carrying bull sperm", since liquid nitrogen can only be transported by road. He stressed that such cargo is stowed in a separate compartment below the bus, and not near passengers' luggage.

The load in question was travelling between Columbus, Ohio and a breeding facility in Laredo, Texas. According to this report, the canisters could have contained as many as 300 to 400 straws, each packing one millilitre of bull goodness.

The going rate for the sperm is apparently $18 to $50 per straw, depending on the quality of the donor, so the value of the spunked Greyhound wad could be as high as $80k. ®

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