Marriage makes women get fat, divorce does same to men
Lonely swingbellies scoff chips once wife departs
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Modern-day feminists will tell you that marriage is good for men and bad for women, and now they have the research to back it up.
Getting married puts women at risk of piling on the pounds, while for men, divorce is the foundation of flab, according to a new study from Ohio State University.
“Married women often have a larger role around the house than men do, and they may have less time to exercise and stay fit than similar unmarried women,” said Dmitry Tumin, lead author of the study and doctoral student in sociology at Ohio State University.
“On the other hand, studies show that married men get a health benefit from marriage, and they lose that benefit once they get divorced, which may lead to their weight gain.”
Unfortunately, the data gathered can't tell us why these weight gains happen so we'll have to assume that all that stuff in the movies about recently divorced men subsisting on TV dinners Stateside – or fish, chips and curry here in the UK – is true. And that the modern have-it-all woman still finds the time to force her husband to consume the odd salad.
The researchers used data on 10,071 people surveyed from 1986 to 2008 to determine weight gain in the two years following a marriage or divorce.
The study also concluded that the older you were, the more likely the "shock" of a "marriage transition" would cause you to balloon, although one could conclude that the older you are, the more likely you are to be carrying a little extra weight anyway. ®
COMMENTS
call my a sexist cad but...
[anonymous because I'm scared of the wielder of the funnel and ramrod]
...I always assumed the women got fat because they'd already trapped their man ;)
Mines done an impressive job of fattening me up as well, I assume to discourage competition. I lose weight quickly when she's away and I'm not being treated like a foies gras goose! My brothers tend to quickly get back down to 'pulling weight' between women, however acrimonious the split was.
Of course extrapolating any weight related issue from research in the United Flab of America to the rest of the planet is wasted effort ;)
Let's apply Occam's razor here
Women let themselves go once they've had their dream wedding. Long hair tends to go shortly after the nuptials, too. I think it was Thomas Hardy who observed that women would like to have a wedding without being married, and me would like to be married without having a wedding.
Married wome DO get exercise
trouble is, its just the muscles that they use for sitting at home, phoning, texting, nagging, and buying stuff with credit cards.

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